things you said before death snatched you.
darkness becomes you : absence of true light.
fluorescent bulbs hang above you, temporarily blinding. the bed in which you lay is full of lumps and bumps, making your back ache more than your throat — it’s almost nice, a difference in pain. sheets are pulled up to your chin, and you try to stop the shivering … but no amount of blankets or a change in thermostat will help.
beside you your wife smiles, warm and bright. ‘ you are so strong, ’ her words are murmured against your chest, but they’re not true. really it’s her who’s the strong one.
opposite of georgia sits your best friend and doctor. serenity is her, expression calm and lips pressed into a curved line. to anyone else this would be a warm smile, just as welcoming as your wife’s, but you know her too well. you can see behind the facade.
❝ georgia, ❞ you begin, voice low. ❝ would you mind going to get me some ice? ❞ a simple request and she’s quick to duck out of the room. you don’t have long until she returns. this is your chance : possibly your only one.
❝ helen, ❞ her name is said on a breath, just above a whisper. you can’t risk letting anyone overhear. and besides, you can’t speak much louder anyways. ❝ i need a favour. ❞ she starts to open her mouth but you interject before she can reply. ❝ i need you — ❞ inhale, long and deep. ❝ — to promise me that you’ll take care of her. that you’ll make sure she moves on. ❞ you all know you don’t have long left. hours, at best. ❝ both of them. ❞ you’ve only held your daughter a handful of times, never changed a diaper or fed her. chemo has made you too weak and shaky. ❝ you have to promise me. ❞ you can’t bare to look at her as you speak. slate - blue eyes trained on the dull, cream - colored walls. tears threaten you, but you can’t cry. georgia will be back any moment. you turn now to look at her so she grasps just how serious you are. ❝ promise me, helen. ❞ a simple nod is all it takes, and you sigh in relief.
it’s only seconds after that georgia returns, cup of ice in hand. she’s still smiling, but you can see the streaks where tears had flowed. you’re so, so tired but you need to comfort her before you leave. you can’t go like this. but despite your best efforts, eyes flutter shut.just for a moment, you think.
a warmth blankets your body.
darkness overcomes you.
i lost the meme / not accepting.
