...I knew it would come to this.

Mambo Maude was mad at me when I called her on Thursday before Fet Damballah on Saturday. 🐍🍀🐍🍀

“I haven’t heard from you in so long! I don’t know why you don’t call me!” I hadn’t spoken to her since Fet Gede in November. I’m still surprised by how long I lived in denial, finding almost any excuse to justify my procrastination. What a moron I was to upset such a calm, poised woman...

I felt terrible preparing for Fet Damballah knowing that nothing going on in my life, no matter how chaotic or heavy; and no amount of introversion are good enough reasons to distract me from committing to serving the spirits. I meant to call Maude in November. I did. I even gave myself a timeline. Just... excuses. 🤥

When I got to Maude’s house for the fet at 8pm last night, I was surprised to be very warmly welcomed by the house! Many people from Fet Gede came back and remembered me, the drummers remembered me, some of the priests remembered me and Maude gave me a huge smile on her way downstairs.

I calmed down. She didn’t hold a grudge.

It was about five hours before things got started. After singing the Priye, Maude welcomed everyone to the house using her microphone. She thanked us for joining her for the occasion, thanked us for coming the distances we traveled, made a call for unified celebration and told us the date of next month’s fet. I smiled. She was in a good mood and glad that I came back.

Here’s the sneaky and scolding (without shaming) shade of a mother, an elder and a Haitian Vodou priestess:

“Make sure you enjoy yourselves and then, call me in the next few days to tell me how you liked it.” She scanned the section of the room I was sitting in but looked at no one in particular. Nervously, I giggled and shook my head, knowing she was talking to me. I was already ashamed. Shame on me. Shame!

“I’M NOT LYING!” She slightly raised her already amplified voice, looked directly at me and right in my eyes. 👀 Yikes! 😱😬😖 More nervous giggling, this time from me joined by those around me.

I heard her. I got it. This isn’t a choice. It’s a necessity. My feelings and my ego don’t matter here. It’s like the question Maude asked me when I gave her my excuses for not coming around, on the phone:

“Do you know what it is to be vulnerable?”

😟😫

She sees everything. The spirits see everything. There’s no use trying to hide here. You simply cannot hide from or escape the spirits when they want you. Like the Mafia, they will find you and if they can’t, they’ll make your life a living Hell until you remember that they’re in charge. They’ll also send a priest/ess when you ignore their reminders (which I definitely did) to discretely but directly call you out at a fet. It’s bad enough I dislike crowds, parties and strangers. When I asked Houngan Alex about this over tea, he said (paraphrased), They know us and our limits. They may push us beyond our comfort zones so we can grow but they’re not trying to intentionally embarrass or hurt us.

My biggest fear is being called into the middle of the party by a spirit and having my personal business put on front street. Okay, so they didn’t call me to the middle of the circle but they certainly called me to the carpet!

Oh! Her eyes pierced my soul! 😖 I am still cringing. I get it! I’ll commit. 😶 So embarrassing... 😞

Lowkey was bored so I made Holden in the Dispatch style!

Kind of low quality BC of tumblr 🫤 I probably will redo this in the future!

Yes this is a heavily modified Flambae... 😭

And no the things on his neck aren't tattoos, they are augments that stretch down all the way from his neck to his back. :)

This is the picrew that the design was based off!

He would sound like Caleb Widogast!

(I love OCs family dynamics, sue me)

Also wanted to know if, since he has powers, if he had once tried to be a hero (vigilante?), if he stayed as a civilian or if he already was walking paths to villany.

Those are all I can think so far 🥲.

- Moon Naiad Mod. 🩵

He has a great relationship with his parents actually but he always was a troubled kid and no one knows why. His mama is German and the dad is Norwegian but was adopted into a Italian family hence the name Gallupo (wasn't actually sure where the name Gallupo came from and there's not much results about it but a source said it had Italian origin so...)

He has attempted to be a hero before. Considering he was in jail three or four times when he was younger, he wanted to change. Do good deeds here and there. But after the Incident, he believes he can never be a hero. And I don't think he wants to be one. It will just make him feel worse.

Also I'll be nice and I'll tell one of his powers it that he has Intoxication Immunity which means he can't be drugged, poisoned and intoxicated which sucks when he wants to be really drunk.