#serpentmass

❝ don't do it ... ❞ his voice wasn't shouted, it was a plea. sebnem stood before him, the knife held out toward the other man. everything had led them here, every step of the investigation, every truth they had uncovered, every lie they had chased. into this place. into this end. yet nothing could have prepared jay for this. nothing could have told him that sebnem would end up betraying them all. especially him.

he couldn't stop the pain tightening inside his chest, the sharp ache of betrayal as she stood now before that man with the clear intent to kill him. was her freedom more important than everything they had shared ? couldn't jay help her reach it without this ? without her crossing a line she could never come back from ? didn't she trust him enough ?

jay held up his gun. it was pointed at her, steady in his hands, but he had no courage to use it, not on her. not when his heart ached for her in a way it never should have. but it was too lat to stop it now. to late to stop what he felt. ❝ don't do it, sebnem. you're better than this. please. ❞ he asked again, begged.

there was a way out, there had to be. jay dared to take a step forward. then another. he wasn't afraid for himself, that had never been the problem. what he feared was that she would do something that would change her forever. and he couldn't let that happen. ❝ this is not who you are ... ❞ suddenly she turned, the knife that had been meant for the other man was now softly pressed against jay's throat.

for a brief second the cold steel made every muscle in his body tense. the sharp edge rested just over his adam's apple, close enough that he could feel the steady rhythm of his own pulse against it. ( no. this you can deal with. and she will not hurt you. ) jay lifted one had slightly, gesturing toward the man behind her to run, and he didn't hesitat.

behind sebnem, adam ruzek appeared near the doorway, ready to step in and take her down. ❝ no ! ❞ jay shouted, the blade pressed harder against his throat. ❝ i got this, leave ! ❞ his voice was firm now, leaving no room for argument. ruzek hesitated, suspicion clear on his face, but in the end he trusted jay enough to step back and close the door, leaving them alone. silence filled the room for a second.

❝ if you're going to do it ... do it quickly. ❞ jay's eyes fell on her, there was no fear in them. not truly. he could never fear sebnem, not after everything he had seen. not after seeing who she truly was beneath all the walls and lies. and this wasn't it, she was more than this. behind those blue eyes there was only one thing left, something he couldn't hide anymore ... love.

the same kind of love she felt for him but could never bring herself to admit. ❝ if you wait too long, they'll take you down, and if you won't let me help you ... then you might as well kill me. because i won't stop trying to help you. ❞ his voice had dropped to a whisper now, the gun that had once been steady in his hand rested loosely at his side, forgotten. ❝ do it ! ❞

jay's team had just made an arrest of an underground group trying to steal some valuable, luxurious jewelry. after a long chase and a tense takedown, they had finally got them. two of jay's partners drove away with the suspects, leaving him behind with the recovered pieces so he could later return them to their rightful owner. for a brief moment, everything seemed calm. then it came out of nowhere.

the sudden shove caught jay completely off guard, slamming him hard against the ground. his grip loosened around the bag of jewelry he had been holding, it flew from his hand, skidding across the pavement. for a split second, he was stunned. ears ringing, breath knocked out of his lungs, just long enough for his training to snap back into place.

instinct took over. jay pushed himself up quickly, eyes sharp and scanning the area before landing on the woman standing over him, already reaching over his head desperately for the bag. her movements were quick, determined. almost with reckless determination. he didn't hesitate.

moving fast, jay grabbed her arm, twisting it firmly behind her back while forcing her to her feet. his other hand moved to secure her wrist, pulling both hands together as he reached for his cuffs. now who in their right mind would be dumb enough to attack an officer out of nowhere ?

❝ who the hell are you ? ❞ jay snapped, voice hard and authoritative. ❝ and are you really that dumb to attack an officer ? ❞

he could not stay any longer. the voices had grown louder with each passing day, no longer distant murmurs buried somewhere at the edge of his consciousness. they called for him now with desperate insistence, echoing through the hollow spaces of his mind like the cries of souls abandoned by their king. the underworld demanded his return. it always had. it was not merely a kingdom he ruled from afar, it lived within him just as surely as blood coursed through mortal veins. every soul that crossed its borders, every shadow that lingered within its halls, every burden entrusted to his care had become woven into the fabric of his being. to remain away for too long was not an act of rebellion, it was self-destruction.

hades had already delayed his return more times than he cared to admit. for @serpentmass, he had ignored the whispers that urged him home. for her, he had endured the growing ache beneath his skin as though parts of himself were slowly being torn away. yet even gods had limits, and the balance he had spent an eternity preserving had begun to fracture around the edges. so he turned away, because looking at nazan would weaken what little resolve he still possessed.

his back remained toward her while he stood motionless, hands clenched tightly at his sides though holding himself together through sheer force of will. he could not bear the thought of witnessing the hurt he knew wuld exist within her eyes. he could not survive seeing disappointment there, knowing he had become yet another person choosing duty over love. then her hand found his, the touch was gentle, human. warm, for one devastating moment, the voices fell silent. the underworld ceased to exist.

there were no restless souls awaiting judgment. no kingdom threatening collapse in his absence. no divine responsibilities carved into his bones. there was only her. a sharp breath escaped him as his eyes closed against the sudden wave of longing threatening to consume him whole. every instinct he possessed urged him to turn around, to gather nazan into his arms and surrender to selfishness just this once. to remain beside her until the end of her day and damn the consequences waiting beyond them. gods knew he wanted to, perhaps more than he had ever wanted anything before.

but wanting had never altered reality. slowly, painfully, hades withdrew his hand from her before the comfort of her touch could convince him to make promises he could not keep. ❝ i can't. ❞ the words emerged barely above a whisper, his throat tightened around them. ❝ i can't stay. ❞ silence settled heavily between them before he forced himself to continue. ❝ not this time. ❞ there was no coldness in his voice, just grief. ❝ not anymore. ❞ the admission carved itself through him with brutal precision. hades had endured suffering throughout his existence. he had survived cronus' cruelty. he had weathered wars and betrayals and the crushing loneliness of immortality.

but none of it compared to willingly walking away from the person he loved while every part of him begged to remain. his shoulders tensed as he struggled to steady his breathing.

everything hurt, the pain came in waves, dull one second and unbearable the next, blurred beneath whatever medication the doctors kept pushing though his system. most of the time, jay couldn't tell if he was awake or dreaming. voices drifted in and out around him, distant and distorted, faces appearing only long enough for him to question whether they had truly been there at all. the last thing he remembered clearly was voight standing over him, telling him everything was going to be okay.

jay had wanted to tell him not to lie. because somewhere between the torture, the blood loss, and the endless hours of pain, something inside him had finally given up fighting. not because of the injuries, nor the fear. because @serpentmass was gone. he had survived worse, he always had. but surviving had never felt this pointless before. the idea of spending the rest of his life carrying the memory of loving her, knowing what it felt like to belong so completely to another person only to lose them, seemed infinitely crueler than death itself.

then something changed, there was warmth. subtle at first, but unmistakable. it settled around him slowly, familiar enough to cut through the haze clouding his thoughts. there was a weight against him, gentle and grounding. the soft brush of another presence close enough to chase away the cold that had followed him ever since she left. his breathing faltered, even buried beneath painkillers and exhaustion, jay wouldn've known her anywhere.

the feeling was woven too deeply into him now, her warmth, her scent. the quiet certainty that for the first time in months, he wasn't alone. his body relaxed despite the pain still burning through his battered ribs. without thinking, he leaned instinctively toward the touch, chasing it in the same way someone stranded in darkness reached for light. if this was another dream, he didn't want to wake up. he couldn't lose her again, not like this. not after spending every day since she left trying to convince himself he could survive without the other half of his soul.

jay kept his eyes closed tightly, unwilling to risk the illusion shattering around him. instead, he focused on the feeling of her forehead resting against his, committing every detail to memory in case it was all gone again when he opened his eyes. a shake breath escaped him. ❝ dont go. ❞ the words were barely audible, slurred by exhaustion and medication. his hand twitched weakly against the hospital sheets before finally managing to move, searching blindly until his fingers found warmth.

. @serpentmass nazan asked for ares : “ i’m not wearing any underwear right now. “

his hands curled into tight fists at the words whispered against his ear. ares, the god of war, had spent centuries mastering battlefields stained with blood and fury alike, yet this felt altogether different. something stirred beneath his ribs, intense and restless in a way anger had never been. where wrath usually settled comfortably within him, another kind of hunger now demanded his attention, one far less familiar and far more difficult to command. perhaps what unsettled him most was the suspicion that nazan had never wanted restraint from him in the first place.

the faintest shadow of a smile touched his lips before one of his hands finally abandoned the futile attempt at self-control. it settled against her waist instead, firm and possessive as he drew her closer until warmth met warmth between them. around them, the world remained exactly as it had been moments before. curious glances might have lingered in their direction, whispers might have followed in their wake, but ares found himself caring very little. his attentions belonged entirely to her.

leaning closer, he allowed his lips to brush near her ear, his voice dropping into something quieter, roughened by amusement and temptation alike. ❝ you're aware, that saying something like that and expecting me not to react is remarkably unfair. ❞ his hand remained at her waist, fingers flexing slightly against the fabric beneath his touch as his gaze searched her face. there was challenge there, but also patience, a restraint offered only because it was her. the smile returned, sharper this time. ❝ should i simply take your word for it, ❞ he asked softly, while his hand moved down to the rim of her dress. ❝ or should i see for myself ? ❞

. @serpentmass ophelia asked for lykan : “ What are the rules I’m not supposed to break? ”

a mischievous smile found lykan's lips the moment ophelia's question reached him. rules, the word alone sounded dreadfully dull. his head tilted slightly as though genuinely considering it, although the amusement dancing in his expression betrayed him long before he spoke. rules and not breaking them belonged in the same sentence only when theron was involved. his brother would insist they existed for a reason, that structure kept people safe, that consequences should be considered.

lykan preferres not to think that far ahead. ❝ rules ? ❞ he repeated, the word rolling off his tongue as though testing it. ❝ what a terribly boring thing to ask. ❞ a quiet chuckle escaped him before he took a step closer, then another. close enough to invade her space, close enough that most people would have hesitated. lykan, however, had never been particular familiar with hesitation. ❝ why bother worrying about the rules, ophelia ? ❞ he asked, his voice dropping into something lighter, more conspiratorial. ❝ breaking them is so much more fun. ❞

his smile widened at the edges. ❝ besides ... we wouldn't want you getting bored down here. ❞ his gaze drifted over her face for a brief moment before settling there once more. there was a certain irony in that. coming to the underworld already sounded miserable enough to most people. ❝ you've made it all the way here, ❞ lykan continued, the amusement in his tone impossible to miss. ❝ and you still want to spend your time following rules ? ❞

. @serpentmass sebnem asked for jay : “ you know i always have your back . ”

jay didn't move at first. he just stood there facing the wall beside the window, shoulders tense beneath the dark fabric of his shirt, hands buried deep inside the pockets of his jeans like holding himself still took effort. the city lights outside barely caught his attention. chicago kept moving no matter what happened in its streets, sirens in the distance, traffic cutting through the night, people going home unaware that somewhere across the city another victim had died while the man responsible kept breathing freely. usually jay knew how to compartmentalize enough to survive the job. not perfectly, but enough to keep putting one foot in front of the other. voight had spent years drilling that lesson into all of them: if you carried every case home with you, eventually the weight would crush you.

but some cases slipped through anyway. some buried themselves too deep beneath his skin to leave behind at the district. jay's jaw tightened slightly as his eyes drifted toward the reflection in the glass, though he barely saw himself there. all he could see was the scene from earlier replaying over and over in his mind, every detail sharpened by frustration and guilt. he knew who had done it. he could feel it with the same certainty that had kept him alive through years of detective work and undercover operations. the problem was certainty didn't mean anything without proof, and proof was exactly what he didn't have, again.

then sebnem touched him. the moment her hand reached him, some of the tensio locked inside his body eased without his permission. that was the part jay still didn't know how to understand, even after everything they had become to each other. he had spent his whole life relying on instinct, training, tangible things he could explain and control. but whatever existed between him and sebnem went far beyond reason. sometimes it felt less like comfort and more like she reached directly into the worst parts of him and quieted them simply by existing near him. it unsettled him in ways he rarely admitted aloud, how deeply connected he had become to her, how impossible it was now to separate where he ended and she began.

maybe that was what being soulmates truly meant, like some part of him had always been looking for her long before they met. ❝ i do, ❞ he answered quietly, finally breaking the silence between them. the words were simply, but the weight behind them settled heavily in the room. because she wasn't just someone he loved. sebnem had become the place he returned to when everything else inside him started falling apart. after nights soaked in blood and violence and the kind of darkness that made him question whether people could truly be saved anymore, she was the only thing that consistently pulled him back from the edge. jay had stopped trying to deny that truth a long time ago. if anything in this world could destroy him completely, it would be losing her.

his eyes lowered briefly before he exhaled through his nose, tiredness finally beginning to crack through the anger beneath his skin. ❝ i just know it was him, ❞ he murmured, his voice roughter now, frustration simmering beneath every word. ❝ voight had no right to pull me off the case. ❞ the whisper carried more emotion than jay usually allowed himself to show openly. fury sat underneath it, sharp and dangerous, because this wasn't only about the victim anymore. it was about failure, his failure. his shoulders stiffened again as the anger resurfaced, quieter now but heavier somehow.

❝ i should've done more. ❞ the confession barely left his lips above a whisper. that was the real wound underneath all of it. jay carried guilt like second nature, collecting it case after case until it became impossible to tell where his responsibility actually ended. in his mind, if someone got hurt, there was always something more he could've done to stop it. slowly he turned his head just enough to look sebnem over his shoulder. blue eyes tired, guarded, but softer when they landed on her than they had been a second earlier. ❝ i need to do something. ❞

@serpentmass said: you can kill me, or you can listen to what i have to say. / sadbh @ jewel

          animorphs sentence starters

               Hands were raised defensively despite mild annoyance on tired features. "I got no intention of killing anyone. Promise." Once sentence was finished, those hands were lowered so they could cross over chest. Throat was cleared before she spoke again. "I'm listening. What exactly is it that you have to say?" A small pause as witch bit her bottom lip. "And more importantly, why was your default thought was about me potentially going for the throat?"