#sentryagent au

A Few Hours Later 

As expected, the quest was a success. John decided for himself that he wouldn’t participate on land and would rather stay on the ship. 

Late at night the prince is tied to the main mast with iron chains, the crew and the captain celebrating on the lower deck.

John, being the first mate and having a room on the upper level on the ship, can see the prince from the small window of his room. 

The prisoner has brown hair with loose locks at the ends, delicate stature– a typical fairytale prince. And those eyes. Blue, like the dark rough ocean John has been in love with since he was a little boy.

Impulsively, without so much as a second thought, John grabs his oil lamp and makes his way down to the prince. He’s curious, wanting to take a closer look at the new prisoner.

Normally royal people taken hostage by pirates were terrified, crying, screaming for help, but this prince looks…bored. He stares far off into the distance over the railing of the ship, only noticing John when he comes to a stop right in front of him. 

"Did they give you something to eat? Water?"

The brunet looks up at John, not giving him an answer, only staring at him nodding his head a little to the side. That's when John notices the bruise; a bright purple one, right above Prince Robert’s collarbone. A frown cuts its way across John's face.

"Those a gift from my men?" 

The prince lets out a soft chuckle, his own eyes wandering to his wrists. Angry red marks circle both of them, but they look a few days old.

John, not in the mood for a mystery, decides to call it quits for tonight, turning on his heel back to his room. 

With his back to his prisoner, John's ears prick up suddenly when a whisper slips through the air. 

"They won’t come for me." 

John raises an eyebrow. A few seconds pass, and the sentiment lands in the quiet: the prince really thinks his father will not come to his rescue. 

John lets out a small laugh. "Sooner or later they all come to save their loved ones, Your Highness," he smirks, turning back only to send the young prince a sly wink, and then returns to his quarters for the night. 

-------------

On the next day they were heading to Deathland Bay. In four weeks they should reach the destination for the trade.

The sun was particularly harsh that day, which gave some members of the crew the nasty idea to cool the prince down with water directly from the sea. 

After the first bucket Prince Robert already starts to hiss in pain, red spots beginning to bloom harshly on his body. The crewmembers are amused. John, however, is not having it. 

"Enough is enough, gentleman," he barks, his authoritative voice causing them to stand at attention. "I think it has slipped your mind that even pirates have moral codes. He is our prisoner, not our plaything."

"But he makes the cutest noises!" one of the crew members shouts out with a laugh, gleefully mocking him, and the rest of the crew joins in. 

John makes his way to the main mast, taking off the chains. He grabs the prince rough by his neck, evoking another hiss from the tormented Prince Robert.

"He will spend the rest of the day in my room. Nobody will go near him," John orders, no room for argument in his tone.

-------------

Robert is beginning to panic. The last thing he wants is to be locked in a room completely at the mercy of a man– no, not again. But it was this or being on display for the whole crew, so he doesn’t even put up a fight.

The remaining pirates exchange glances while First Mate John drags Prince Robert across the ship and into his cabin. 

Inside, John puts his thump under Prince Robert's chin making him look directly into John's eyes. The prince flinches because of the rough skin of John's finger and his already aching face. 

"Listen Prince, you can sleep on that bed, you can read some of the books or navigation cards but you are not leaving this room, understood?" While speaking, John glances over Bob's face. The skin looks bad enough pinkish, some crust forming around the edges. 

Prince Robert only nods not wanting to encourage the first mate's rage. 

John goes back to his crew and leaves behind an overwhelmed prince. Never in his life showed someone this much care towards him… He looks around the small room, saving the exploration for later. He takes the blanket from the bed and lays down on the small rug right in front, falling asleep within seconds. 

Meanwhile John has to deal with the captain of the ship. 

"You took away their entertainment. Are you getting soft on your old days Johnny?"

He took it as an offense. Not the getting soft thing, the age part. Yes he was the oldest pirate on this ship but he was not that old. 

"He is not entertainment, he is our leverage, nobles only pay for family members who are still alive" He practically spat right at the captain who in response only raised an eyebrow in amusement. "He will stay in my room, nobody else gets to touch him." 

"Well then I hope you put your prince to good use since you're the only one who is allowed to lay a finger on him" The additional smirk on the captain's face made John go feral, but he quickly decided to let it show on the outside.

When the sun set behind the horizon John returned to his room to find a sleeping prince, right in front of his bed? It was a strange sight, the slender prince with his soft, round face laying on the hard floor like a domestic animal. Carefully he walks over to him and places the Prince into the more comfortable bed. Tucking him under the warm covers. John's eyes linger a little too long. His thoughts wandering off, the prince just looked so innocent.

John sits down at his desk and starts to write. After some time he hears a small, confused whimper. 

"Seems like the prince of sleep is finally awake, you missed the whole day, it's already dark outside."

Robert only stared at him, right into John's eyes practically stealing the air out of his lunges. 

"Prince Robert, why did you sleep on the ground? I offered you my bed, is it so disgusting to you that you would rather choose the cold hard floor." He couldn't resist mocking him a little. 

Prince Robert seemed startled. John was sure he could see the faint sight of a pout beginning to form at the corner of the prince’s mouth. 

John rises from his chair approaching the prince in a reserved manner. After the first few two steps Robert already flinches back. 

"I didn't want to invade your personal space. Aside from that, to you I am Bob or you can address me with the former titles. You will not call me Robert." At the last part his voice hardens. 

That answer left John surprised. ,,And why is that, my Prince?"

"Robert means I am in trouble." John holds his breath while the prince stares on the ground. With good intention he still comes closer to the prince holding out his hand palm open, an invitation.  

"Well then, Bob, show me your face" 

Hesitant Bob faces him, his eyes still fixated onto the floor not daring to meet the pirates gaze. John turns on his heel and pulls a jar from one of his shelves. A greenish gel reflected by one of the candles. 

He puts some of it on his fingers and brings it towards the prince's face. Bob winces in response, his eyes fixed on John's fingers. 

"I promise it will stop the pain and will make your skin heal faster, it will not hurt." John's voice soft as if he is trying to sooth a wounded animal.

The prince closes his eyes giving the pirate silent permission. The gel makes the pain go away in an instant, a small moan escapes Roberts mouth. The pirate smiled a little at the prince's reaction. After a few minutes John comes to a halt since he is finished with Bob's face.

"I thought it would heal itself throughout the day. Seems like you're a little sensitive."

Bob grabbed the pirate at his wrist with something close to urgency. 

"I need it on my chest too, please." His voice is barely a whisper. Slowly Bob opens up the buttons of his white shirt. John tried to keep his composure, while adding the gel onto the Prince's marred skin.

Bob's body went limb, faltering under the tender movement.

John got himself up from the bed. He got rid of the remaining gel of his fingers then put the jar back on the shelf. He was a little hesitant, but he didn't want to sleep in his sweat through clothes, so the first layer landed on the ground. John just went to lay down on the carpet, where the Pprince slept earlier when Bob reaches his hand out he stops.

"Please"? his voice sounds so tired as if the sleep from the day did nothing to him. For a short second John thinks about staying in his spot. He should say no, should talk some sense into the prince but how could he? Anything close to intimacy was rare on sea and John was never the type to get a quick fix at some of the brothels on land so, how was he supposed to say no to such an offer?

He carefully moves Bob to the side of the bed with the small window facing outside. Just laying next to him, his arms straight at his sides. After a few minutes he feels Bob's soft hand on his. John's mind was racing. Was the prince already asleep? Is John supposed to do something? But before he can spiral any further Bob takes the pirates hand and lays his whole arm over himself, feeling John's rough skin, his warm breath and rapidly increasing heartbeat. 

It left John confused. Maybe the prince is in a state of delusion, not aware of what situation he is currently in. 

What he couldn't know was that this was Bob's way of getting something out of this situation for himself. Every time someone might take advantage of him, Bob would cling to something, a hug, a pat on the back of his head, a praise, with John it was the pirates warm embrace. Bob clung to it so he wouldn't lose his mind.

The next morning, John did leave earlier than usual. Making Bob sob a little when he woke up and realized that the pirate is no longer with him. The prince starts to stroll around the room. Looking at the Navigation charts spread on the desk, his eyes wandered to a leatherbound notebook. Bob picks it up, browsing through the pages, smiling at the small but detailed drawings which appear on every other page. Suddenly the door swings open, John storming in, placing a big Jug of water and a plate with bread, fruits and even a little cheese and meat on the desk. 

"I haven't seen you drink anything since your arrival here, so drink up" It was the roughness in his voice that made it sound like a command. With the first drop of water on Bob's lips he becomes aware of how thirsty he actually is, emptying the jug within seconds. 

"Why don't you read something nice?" He throws a disgusted look at the notebook Bob had dropped on the desk in exchange for the jug. John strolls over to his small shelf, targeting a specific book. 

"Here this one’s from your kingdom, it's about creatures who hide in the rivers made of grass." 

Bob's heart began to race. Melting at the kind gesture he took the book out of John's hand, and focused on the title, not realizing that he was holding the book upside down. 

"Oh my- you can not read? What type of prince does not know how to read?" It sounded more concerned than scolding, nonetheless Bob started to sweat and a tint of red appeared at the tip of his ears.

"My father said there is no need  for me to learn it." Bob's chest begins to tighten. 

"But you are a future king! How will you rule over a kingdom when you're not able to read contracts, pamphlets or war declarations?" 

"I told you they will not come after me." Bob's voice only being a whisper again his tone without a trace of strength, staring down at his own hands. 

"You are their only child, the only right heir to the throne, who else would your father-" John's voice came to a stop. He didn't recognise it at first but now the sun is flooding the room with daylight,  he sees them. The bruises, the cuts, the scars. The ribcage showing through the skin.

"To this day i still dont know what i did wrong. My father does not have a single bit of love for me. We never played together when I was a child, we never laughed together in the way it should go. There was only shouting and screaming. After I reached my 5th birth celebration he would beat me for my existence alone. And my Mother, how could any woman love a child that was forced upon her?" Bob's words hung heavy in the air.

John moved unconsciously, close to the prince who was staring at the floor again. The pirate carefully places his hand on the cheek of the Prince. Small tears leaving Bob's eyes while trying to look at John. Inside John there was a storm brewing, how could someone hurt his own son, how can anyone be so cruel to a Prince, to this Prince?

John started to gently stroke Bob's cheek. Wiping away his tears. 

"I can teach you a little, you can not learn it completely in the time we remain together, but maybe we can start with the letters." 

"I would like that." Bob felt a little sting in his heart but for the very first time in his life, it came from joy. "But how do you know how to-"

A loud knock on the door made the both of them jump, away from each other. 

"They need me back, see you later" John heels out of his room, out of Bob's sight, he would have liked to just stay there with him and teach him everything he knew, but he had duties. 

Bob stayed right where John left him, mind a thick and impervious fog. Letting his own hand glide over the spots where John did before. He was so kind to him without any reason it seemed. Bob was used to people trying to charm him in hopes of getting favors from the prince or even the king himself but on this ship Bob had nothing to offer, he is a prisoner.

There is nothing John could gain from him, with one exception. Bob didn't mind the thought, deciding that he will give John what he wants when he comes back later.  

Later At Night The Same Day

John was  exhausted, the thoughts about Bob's father haunted him and then the crew has been completely incompetent at handling a semi heavy storm. His limbs were sore, breath heavy, his clothes completely soaked from the rain. 

All of the unpleasantries disappeared the second he opened the door seeing Bob sitting on his bed. Barefoot, his pants rolled up right up to his knees, his shirt undone to the point where his bellybutton is. John has seen a lot but it was the first time in a very long time that his face started to redden. 

"What is going on here?" 

The prince rose up from the bed, walking right up the Pirate. Bob's hands went right to the other man's chest, slowly taking off the soaked coat. Then slowly Bob's Hand wanders to the pirates shirt, he leans in to whisper in John's ear while fiddling with the first Button. "I want to express my sincere gratitude for saving me from these savages out there and for your kindness."

For a sweet second John thinks about it, he thinks about the prince having his way with him, about all the things John would love to do to the blue eyed prince, but no. Before Bob's hands could wander to the second button John took his wrists a little too rough maybe.

"No, I don't want this, not this way." 

Bob's eye widened to an unnatural amount. John being the first man to reject such an offer from him. Now he braced himself for something else entirely, the consequences of his reckless behaviour but nothing like it would come. 

"Now, sit down at the desk, I will teach you everything I know." Bob looked hurt, he was so sure he was doing the thing he was expected to do, but as usual he was wrong. With unsteady legs Bob makes his way over to the desk. John followed right behind him. 

"I guess since you don't know how to read, you don't know how to write either?" 

The prince shook his head from left to right. Shame crawling into his face. John tries to remember how he learned it, what practice was the most useful.

"Well then we start with the individual letters." He pulls out a quill and some parchment, writing a big A on the empty parchment.

"This is an A as in Apple or Anchor. Write it out, 20 times." John hands Bob the quill. Bob tries to imitate the writing but it ends up looking like a knotted rope. After a few minutes Bob starts to become nervous, his hand trembling. That's when John pulls Bob into his lap. Taking the hand which is leading the quill.

"Easy, start a little to the left, half circle, up down and horizontal bow. Good." After a few tries together, Bob can finally do it alone. His chest bloomed with pride for once. Bob turns his face around meeting the pirates eyes already lurking on him. And for a few seconds their faces are close, their noses short before brushing.

"You're doing great Bob, we should start with the next one." Johns presses out under his breath, suddenly realizing in which situation he put himself in. Bob only gave him a small, almost hypnotized nod.

That's how it went for the next couple of days. At day Bob would practise everything John taught him the previous night. John was always checking up on him, bringing the prince water, food and also new clothes. The crew was talking about the unlikely pair behind John's back, saying they actually felt pity for the prince.

John had a reputation of being anything but gentle in many ways. Some of them were even worried the prince wouldn't be alive at the time they arrived at Deathland bay. But that's it. There were nothing more than rumors. John's longing for the sea was a gift and a curse he was born with. He could swim before he could walk. Everyone wanted to learn how to ride a horse, John wanted to know how to sail a ship. The royal navy wasn't to his liking, to many pointless and hypocritical rules , so he became a Pirate. Building a reputation of being rough and brutal but in the background he always made sure nobody got hurt beyond an extent of no repair. Secretly e was tired of it, of this two faced life.

-------------

Lost in the motion of Bob's hands he didn't hear the question at first so he tilted his head hoping for Bob to repeat his question. 

"You still haven't told me who taught you all that. We both know this goes beyond everything a pirate needs to know."

"Okay I am telling you but only if you promise to not look at me differently after."

"I promise."

"I was not born a pirate, the opposite actually. I come from a wealthy family, not a lord by any means and still wealthy." John takes a deep breath preparing himself to go on. "Shortly after I turned eleven our house burned down to its grounds, my brother, my sister, my mother and my father, they all died in the flames."

Again a deep breath is the only sound filling the room. "I only survived that day because my father sent me to sleep outside, in an empty barn nearby, when the stale smoke reached my nose, the flames were already too high."

Now he turned his gaze away from Bob all the way to the porthole. 

"Some of our neighbors prepared the funeral. I knew if I attended, someone would grab me and send me to the next orphanage. So instead I went down to the docks and stole myself on a ship that was short before sailing. Nobody minded the free labour of course. That was a long time ago, I am not even sure if I can fully remember what they looked like."

Bob said nothing, just pulled him into his arms and even though John Walker would never admit it Bob was certainly sure that his shirt started to wet. 

-------------

It happened one night that John was heavily asleep while Bob was restless. Tossing and turning in his spot. He didn't want to disobey John's commands but the cabin felt too small, suffocating, like a trap. So when the moon was nearly completely hidden he snug out. Out from John's arms, out the door of the cabin. He was cautious, looking left and right many times before closing the door behind him. He went all the way back to the stern of the ship, he told himself it was just a need for fresh air but soon enough he would find himself mindlessly grabbing the railing taking a few steps up.

Under him the ocean clashed in unforgiving waves, the salt present as ever, only the stars and a single lamp a few feet away spending some light in this unruly night. This could be Bob's chance, an opportunity to make one final decision for himself, made only by himself. God knows what they will do to him in a few days when they finally realize that Bob's Father has as much interest in him as a farmer in a dead horse. 

Still Bob can’t do it, his fingers, which are currently the only barrier between him and the sea, don't give in. Maybe he can allow himself a little more time since this is the first time in a long time- no the first time ever that even given this circumstances Bob felt safe. Not only that he feels seen and understood and who can blame him that he wants to relish in this for a little longer. 

So he takes a deep lunge filling breath, and jumps down the impact letting him stumble a couple of steps back right into the arms of one of the crew members. His first instinct is to scream but one of them makes sure he can’t. 

"You know I’m not the jealous type but it is custom that every prey is shared on this ship so John Walker is breaking a rule by keeping you all locked up."

Bob is sure it is the same man as the last time. Bob's instincts take over once again he is not even trying to defend himself he knows fully well he doesn't have a chance so his body lets loose, his eyes falling close hoping that whatever this will be, ends fast.

A hand tugs at his pants, another at the hem of his shirt while one stays pressed on his mouth. One of the men clears his throat in an attempt to say something but the only noise becoming present is a shot followed by the thud of a body falling to the ground. 

"You two, in the ocean with him."

"You're coming with me."

It all happens too suddenly, Bob can not proceed what is happening fast enough so the next thing he feels is how John throws him over his shoulder as if he weighs nothing. Back in the dim candlelight of John’s quarters, Bob starts to shake the second the door falls into its frame. The words he wants to say get stuck in the back of his throat forming a thick lump. 

When John steps closer Bob flinches backwards, his back hitting the desk. Again he braces himself for the worst and again he feels hands tearing at the hem of his shirt but this time they don't get stopped. The warm air of the room hits Bob pleasantly; he still doesn't dare to open his eyes. Only when he feels something warm and slightly wet on his forehead he dares to open them and is greeted with eternal worry. 

"Why did you go outside?" Bob swallows hard, guilt sitting heavy in his heart he wouldn't have guessed that he could course John in such much distress.

"I needed air, fresh air. For once."

"Then why not just take a few steps away from the door. Why did you go all the way back?"

"You're going to declare me insane when I confess something called for me?"

John has to chuckle at that. It is a story as old as time that man felt called while being on a ship, by the sea, by sirens, the wind itself.

"I would never." In silence John continued to clean Bob off from the blood that is not his. When Bob sees the thick scarlet stains in the white handkerchief he begins to tremble again tears slowly building up behind his eyelids. 

"You took that man’s life, without warning." 

"Oh he has been warned more times than one, now he paid the price."

"I am uncertain if I am worthy of such a high price."

"Dont, don’t do that. He was a bad man who couldn't follow the rules. He knew the consequences. I am sure no one on this ship will touch you again."

"No one?"

A Few Days Later

The prince and the pirate were laying in bed, Bob's head resting on John's chest. The pirates hand carefully stroking the brown soft locks of the prince.

"How certain are you that your father will not come to rescue you." Bob holds his breath for a second and faces John. 

"He will not come." Not a trace of doubt in his words. 

"Bob I- I am sorry for you." 

"Please don't, being on this ship is the first good thing that ever happened to me. When the crew came into my chambers I wasn't scared, I just hoped it would go quickly. I honestly didn't expect to be kidnapped, I thought everyone in this world knew my father hates me." A small laugh escapes his mouth. 

"You are telling me all this and still, you laugh, unbelievably." 

"John, what will happen when they realize my father is not coming." The captain will be feral is the first thing that comes to John's mind, the crew will also go wild because of the disappointment. 

"Nobody will do you any harm, my prince, I promise." His strokes wander from Bob's hair to his face. Bob's eyes watering at the pirates words. For once John's eyes were not fixed on the ocean eyes of the prince but rather his fine, pink lips. Bob tries to close the distance between them, John stops him, the heart of the prince breaking a little.

"My prince, I am not worthy of yours." John tried to convince the both of them. 

"That, is not for you to decide anymore."

"So your ordering me?" 

"I take the burden of decision away from you, yes." For the very first time Bobs voice is strong and certain. When a prince demands your attention you're obliged to give it to him and with this realization all rational thinking left the room. 

John placed his hand at the back of Bob's head. To John these are the softest most divine lips he ever tasted. Bob on the other hand was surprised, John's lips were dry like the rest of his skin but the kiss was incredibly gentle. 

"I am not sure if I can stop myself if we continue, my prince." 

"Then don't stop yourself, please" The plea made John shiver. Awakening something inside of him. He wants to hear more of those sweet words of the prince, he wants to ruin him.

With one swift motion Bob is under him. John placed kisses along the prince's neck, while opening the buttons of his shirt. The shirt landed somewhere next to the bed. John kisses continue down Bob's chest to his belly, stopping right at the hem of his trousers. 

"John, please I've been patient, I did everything you wanted me to do, so please no teasing." He was aware he sounded pathetic, almost like a whore, but he didn't care. 

"That is true my prince you've been a perfect student, always doing as you're told. So be a little more patient and you will get everything you want." Bob whines out shamelessly, while John can only smirk at the cute noises the prince makes for him. He places his hand at the hem of Bob's trousers and pulls them down, slowly. So agonizingly slow that Bob starts to wiggle his hips. 

"Please John, please." The whines grew louder, till the pants were all the way down, Bob's cock freed from the fabric. John gave himself a few seconds to admire the view fully. He looked like a painting, one of those that hung in churches and castles. John's mouth starts to fill up with salvia.

"John is something w- oh god."  Before the insecurities could go to Bob's head, John had Bob's length in his mouth. Not all the way at first, giving the prince and himself time to adjust. Slowly going up and down using his tongue.

"Oh my god John I don't think- I don't think I can do this, it's too much."

"First you are begging me and now you're saying it's too much? Not a lot going on inside this pretty head of yours, my prince." John's mocking could have made him come right on the spot. Bob whines out and thrust his hips a little. 

Moments pass, Bob’s hair sticks to his forehead. The Pirate messes with him, taking up speed then when Bob nearly reaches his high he slows down. Driving Bob dangerously close to the edges of sanity

"John I swear, if you continue your stupid game with me." The Prince spatted through gritted teeth. 

"Then what? Are you going to punish me? My devotion to you is the biggest punishment the gods had to offer and I wouldn't want it any other way." Bob's eyes went wide, that was the last bit. With all his strength he holds the fairly larger pirate in place, trusting his own hips up. The noises leaving the both men were filthy and raw.

"I am going to come and you will take it, everything of it." It wasn't a question, it was a command which sent a shock of pleasure through John, moaning with his mouth closed on the prince's cock. With one final thrust Bob releases himself, down Johns throat, the moan sealing this affair making sure that every crew member knows what is going on in John's room.  

Bob was shaking in completely bliss. His body relaxing for the first time in forever. Both men were trying to catch their breaths, John getting back into his spot next to Bob. 

"I am so sorry, I lost control, did I- did i hurt you? Are you hurt? What can I do?" Bob was overwhelmed he was not used to this, to have to have the upper hand, to be in control. He looked at John, worried sick but John just started to laugh.  

"Everything is fine, I feel great. Besides," He looked down on himself, a bright white spot on his pants, "You made me come in my pants like a little boy." 

"I apologize. I didn't mean to- I can still return the favour, just tell me when you're ready."

"Bob, everything is fine, why are you concerned? You're a prince, everyone has to bow to your orders, and I mean that in a good way."

"Well there are some men at my fathers court who would beg to differ." 

The following silence in the room was unbearable for John.

John settled his hand on Bob's cheek. "What, what did they do to you?" 

"Well, since they knew that they had no consequences to fear they used me like they pleased. Most of them were older, stronger, bigger than me. They made sure it always hurt."  

Tears unintentionally came down Bob's face. John pulled him into his embrace in an attempt to comfort him, loud sobs escaping Bob's lips.

"I will kill them all. One after the other. I will save your father last so he chokes on his own fear and blood."

-------------

The next few days nothing out of the ordinary happened. Until one cloudy evening the navigator of the ship approaches John in a reserved manner. "We will reach deathland bay in 3 days." 

It didn't matter to John. If Bob's father against all odds would demand his son back, John would sooner or later return to the Kingdom by himself. When the crew realizes that the king will not come, things will get messy but John already has a plan, if you can call it that when it solemnly relies on the captains pride and greed.

Bob wasn't fond of the news, John could read it in his face.  

"Don't you want to leave this ship, this cabin, feeling solid ground under your feet?" 

"I don't want to leave you, I can't bear the thought of being away from you." 

"You will not leave me, nothing on this ship holds me here."

"I thought about something. Maybe if my father hates me enough, he will send someone to get me only to lock me away at his court, I would never be allowed to leave the castle again. John please, don't let them take me."

"Nobody is ever going to harm you again, my Prince." The night was long, Bob and John savouring each other's embrace. 

Yet it was the night before their arrival that the energy started to change. Bob seemed more tense, more absent minded. John on the other hand never felt so sure in his life. 

Both laying in John's bed together. Bob's anxiety gets out of hand and to ease his mind, he starts to kiss John with a deep, uncontrollable hunger. His hands roaming over John's body without shame or hesitation.  

"John please, I want to feel you, all of you." 

In John's head prayers were forming and he wasn't a religious man by any means. "god forgive me for I am about to sin". His mind goes crazy under Bob's delicate and soft fingers.  Like a man possessed John started kissing, licking and even softly biting every inch of skin his mouth could find, ravishing the prince as if he was his last supper.

"That is not how it is supposed to go." 

"What do you mean?" 

"I am a prince I am supposed to be atop of you." 

"Oh, really? That's how it goes? I think we both know that's not going to happen."

"Bastard." 

With their mouths colliding, formalities and the rest of the world were fast forgotten. There was no time to waste a fact the both of them were aware of. John's hands made quick work of Bob's remaining clothes brushing him on every inch of skin possible. Bob squirmed under it, under John's calloused fingers, under the firm yet tender grip. 

Soon sweat would keep them company while the air around them is getting thicker by the minute. John's tongue left Bob's mouth and gave him the short chance to breathe again while John worked it down his neck sucking at all the right spots, leaving bruises for sure but none of them cared. 

Bob tugs at John's pants who ultimately takes them off, at the sight Bob nearly chokes on his own spit. John notices his reaction bringing his lips close to Bob's ear. 

"Don‘t worry I take care of you. It will not hurt. I promise."

He doesn't know why exactly but Bob felt the need to shake his head to confirm what John just said. There was no room for indecision anyway as John continued his work on Bob. Making his way to the protuberant collarbone down to his belly coming to halt there. 

"Give me a second." He doesn't have a chance to protest, with a wink John is up making his way to the shelf in the corner of the room. Bob pledges to himself that someday he will get this ass painted if John wants it or not. 

When he comes back Bob is confused to say the least, in John's hand rested a small bottle which contains a lipide that seemed to be of the same consistency John used on Bob for his burns yet this one is see-through. 

"John, what is that?"

"It makes sure you don't feel any pain." 

The fact that Bob does not know about it nearly lets John break the bottle. His answer seemingly did nothing to take away Bob's confusion. 

"Lay back and let me show you. I never break my promises." Without a second thought Bob falls back into the pillows trusting John with every fiber of his heart. Bob hears how he pops the cork, then John's now cold fingers brushing at his entrance the small buck of Bob's hips lets John chuckle under his breath.

"It works even better when you let go." Bob focuses his eyes on the ceiling along with a deep exhale John carefully pushes his index finger inside and with that Bob is gone. His mouth falls open, his hands fisting the sheets under him, back arching slightly off the bed. With every finger added everything started to feel lighter, sweeter. When John is pleased with his work the sight underneath him nearly frightens him, Bob is completely and utterly delirious. 

"Maybe we should save the rest for another-" Before John can finish his sentence Bob has cupped his face in his small hands with an intense pressure. 

"If you stop now I will never let you touch me again."

"Is that so, my prince?" Bob falls back onto the bed, stars forming behind his eyes. Sweet little whines slipping through his lips. 

With the rest of the liquid prepares himself and before pushing in he stops again. Patting Bob's cheek just slightly. "Are you really sure?" 

With the little bit of strength left Bob presses his heels into John's back and every ounce of restraint leaves John at once. He planned on pushing slowly instead it is a long motion which Bob takes without trouble still his back leaves the bed completly now.

"Gods I- Bob you're so tight I- I don’t think I will last long." 

"Doesn’t matter just move, please." 

Oh and John does for the first thirty seconds he even manages to be gentle then his hips fall into an barbaric rhythm if you can call it a rhythm at all and Bob? He moves his hips with John, it drives him insane so much that he has to press Bob's hips down so John doesn't come on the spot. The firm grip pulls a frantic moan out of Bob's throat. 

Bob digs his nails in John's skin, his back, his waist, his shoulders even his teeth make their way into his skin. John tries his very best but it is no use, his high is building up way too fast, he pulls Bob legs on his shoulders and bends them till his knees are at the same height as his chin. The angle sends butterflies to Bob's stomach while John nearly combust. 

"Do you want me to pull-"

"For heaven's sake John, don’t." And with one deep thrust John spills himself inside Bob, relief washed over him because Bob nails dug in deeper than before a rigged moan escaping him while Bob comes between them, nearly at the same time.

When John pulls out Bob sobs at the loss but is grateful for the chance to breathe properly again. John next has his sweet time cleaning Bob. Taking in every hiss and every crunch of his nose. 

Careful John rests himself next to Bob pulling the blanket over both of them. Bob's arm is around John's chest in the blink of an eye. 

"Thank you." 

"You don't have to thank me, really."

"Yes I do. You might not be the first to touch me yet you are the first who showed me that it doesn't have to be painful." A single tear steals its way down Bob's cheek and John is fast to stroke it away with his thumb. His own chest blooming with pride and sorrow at the same time.

"I hope it was not only not painful but also pleasurable."

"It was indeed." Bob's hand wanders dangerously far down John's torso.

"In fact I might wish for you to do it again." 

Before Bob can reach too low John catches his hand in his placing a gentle kiss on the back of it. 

"How can I say no to a prince?"

-------------

The navigator was right. When the sun was high in the sky they arrived at their destination. Bob put on the clothes in which he arrived. John made his way to the lower deck, Bob didn't know why. John suggested it was better for the prince to know as little to nothing. The door to the cabin swung open, Bob turning to the door. 

"John you're back?" 

"No Prince Robert, Johnny remains somewhere else."

Bob froze in his movement. His smile dropped to the bottom of the ocean. He goes into a defensive posture without realizing it.

"Oh don't worry prince, I am not going to hurt you, you're way too precious for that. But I decided that John's mind is not clear enough for the handover, I got the impression that he may not let you go when it matters." 

The captain came close, too close for Bob's liking. "Prince, we can do this the hard way or you do as you're told, one way or the other your time on this ship is over." It sounded cruel but for once Bob decided to not give in without a fight.

He gives the captain a kick in the knee attempting to run to the door but the captain was fast to catch Bob. The kick was just not efficient enough. In seconds Bob's mouth was gagged with a handkerchief, his hands and arms tied, the end of the rope in the hands of the captain. 

The prince was dragged outside, the sun stung his eyes. John was just coming up from the lower deck seeing Bob in the hands of the captain. 

"Johnny I thought you wouldn't mind. I decided you will not be with us for trade since you always prefer staying on the ship anyway?" The captain was laughing thinking it would get a reaction out of John but he was as cold as a stone. 

"As always captain, you are right I dont mind." That was it, John retreats to his quarters without looking at Bob. He couldn't stop himself, he was sure that this was a part of John's plan but tears were running down his face nonetheless.

"Oh come on pretty prince you will soon be reunited with your family, isn't that worth a smile?" 

The captain drags Bob onward, off the ship heading to the coordinates for the trade. The rest of the crew followed them, leaving John behind. 

After a short walk they positioned themselves waiting for the king or maybe the king's guards. Hours pass, nobody is coming, the sun slowly starts to settle. The crewmembers start to fidget in their spots. At some point a muffed hysterical laughter was echoing through the palms, it was the prince. 

The captain finally loses his patience, grabbing Bob by his neck, yanking him to his knees. The prince kept on laughing. 

"Yeah keep laughing, stupid little prince." The draw of the trigger getting pulled back was heard. The captain's pistol pointed at Bob's head. 

Then the same sound was heard again a little more distant.

"Don't." At the sound of John's voice Bob felt relief. Still in a dangerous situation, but knowing that at least once in his life someone would come to rescue him made him feel whole. 

John pointed his pistol directly at the captain who then slowly turned around to face John. 

"Here is the deal, you and the rest of the crew go back to the ship and leave, I left everything back in my cabin including the gold and the jewelry from our last raid. Let him go." 

The captain looked between John and Bob and then to his crewmembers. What John had to offer was nothing compared to what they had demanded from the king yet givin the situation it was better than nothing. The captain lowers his gun making his way over to John, never breaking eye contact, whispering in his ear. 

"If this is a trap I will hunt you and your pretty prince down. I will let him bleed out like a pig and you will watch. You just disowned yourself, stained everything being a  pirate stands for with shame." 

He spat at John's feet and then whistled loudly, a clear signal for the crew to leave. John waited a few moments making sure they were really gone, then he ran to Bob.  He pulled a knife from his holster and freed Bob from the handkerchief. 

"John, you're here." 

"Told you I had a plan." John got rid of the unpleasant and amateurishly tied rope. 

"So your plan was to hope that the captain just retreats?"

"I said I had a plan. Never said it’s a good one."

Bob was on John in an instant, enjoying each other in a tight hug. 

"Bob come on, we don't have a lot of time, you don't want to be out here when it's dark." 

Helping the prince get up on his feet. At sunset they reached a rusty tavern. John going inside, Bob waiting right next to the entrance. After a few minutes John comes back. "Follow me." John grabbed Bob's hand carrying an unknown bag over his shoulder. 

With a key he opens the door to a room rented out. It smells as bad as the tavern looked. John lit up a few candles trying to make the most of it. Fortunately for the men the room contained only one bed.

Bob closes the door behind him.

"What's in the bag?" He was already tugging at the cord. Plenty of apples and pieces of bread are on display covering up some fabric, which is not the bag itself. Bob curiously pulls it out. 

"What? You can not walk around here in your cute little prince attire, they will eat you alive." 

Bob tossed the clothes to the side walking straight up to John pulling him down for a deep, longing kiss. Still high on the moment, they got rid of the other one's clothes and the remaining adrenaline. A night spent in total bliss. 

It was the next morning, John was still fast asleep, a quiet snoring escaping his mouth. Bob opened the window and looked outside. The small salty breeze dancing around his nose. The noise of the drunk guests from the tavern making their ways back home echoed through the wind. It hit him then with full force, for the very first time Bob was free. He could do whatever, however, whenever he wanted, yet all he wanted was to stay with John. But there was something else, something buried deep in his heart. It took him a few days to figure it out. 

As usual both men were laying in bed, comfortable silence filling the room while Bob tried to gather all his courage.

"John? What are your plans?" 

"We can do whatever you want. We can stay here, we can sail a ship to find another place to live. As long as you're by my side every place will feel right."

Bob took a deep breath. 

"I want to go back to my kingdom. It's not only me, my father mistreats. The people also suffer from his reign. My father rejects cooperation with the surrounding kingdoms, so every Winter many people starve to death, while the court dines on the best food. They deserve someone who cares about them." 

John's heart swells hearing Bob talking so eager about wanting a better life for his folk, pulling him closer. 

"You know, it will take time. We cannot just go over to your kingdom and behead your father, we must make sure there will be no remembrance of reign left. We need a ship and more importantly, allies." 

Bob nods, seeing in John's eyes his plan already unfolding in his mind. 

Five years, it took them five whole years. Finally being only one sunrise away from their destination. For five years they traveled the world with the small but steady "Thunder". They recruited some old friends of John. Thieves and crooks, but just like John they had their hearts at the right spot. More than willing to help hearing Bob being so certain talking about being a better king to his folk. 

The night before the battle, the men were tangled into each other. But Bob was absent, his mind racing through every possible outcome that tomorrow could bring. John saw it in his eyes fixed on the door instead of him. He was giving Bob all he had to offer, placing small kisses on his neck, his chest, his lower belly, nothing seemed to work. 

"You know this will not be our last night together, my prince." Finally Bob snaps awake in his trance. Positioning himself on top of John straddling his lap. 

"Indeed it is not. Tell me, is it true? I heard before a great battle it is custom for the wives of soldiers to give in to their husbands demands fully to take away the stress and raise moral?" This was enough to excite John completely; his attention now focuses solely on the prince. The filthy suggestion makes him hard on the spot and Bob can already feel it. 

"Well, my prince, from what I heard it is custom. But since I am not your wife I can only tell you what I heard from others." It was a challenge Bob took willingly. 

"You are right you are not my wife or rather my husband, for now. A bit aside from that, tomorrow at the same time I will be your king and even the toughest pirates obey to what the king demands, right?" Bob's hand made its way around John's throat putting on pressure not enough to cut the air from his lungs but enough to show John who is in charge.

"Yes my King." It was a revelation and a plea at the same time. John taking a glance at the future king the confidence and pride looked so good on him. The candles at the desk made Bob shine in a golden light. 

"Take me as an offering, from the gods to another." That was all Bob needed to hear. Placing kisses everywhere on John, not a single part of skin left untouched. Bob got rid of John's undergarments continuing his kisses down to his sensitive parts. 

"You tell me when it gets too much right?" Bob's voice is soft in concern. 

"With you my love there is no such thing as too much." 

A laugh leaves Bob's mouth prepping a line of kisses from John's chin all the way down to his bellybutton. 

"Enough, you will tell me right ?" 

"Yes, my King" It sounded so teasing and as a result Bob saw the back of his own head, making it his mission to get the smug expression off of John's face. 

The sensation felt different to anything Bob ever felt before. It were John's hands gripping him as if his life depended on it, his pleas of Bob going just a little faster, a request he gladly fulfills. 

With John's moans filling the room, which Bob is the reason of, something washes over him. When he looks at John's strains of so deliciously berry blond hair, at his unkempt beard, at the many battlescares which adorn his body, a need overcomes Bob.  A desire to crawl under John's skin and make himself home there. 

"I will change the laws." His nails dig deep into John's skin leaving new scares to admire later. 

"I will bend them to my liking. You will rule tight next to me, never leaving my side." Every normal person in this world would be scared by now or at least worried meanwhile John's eyes soften, getting lost in Bob's words. 

Bob picks up on John's behaviour thrusting his hips like some kind of a wild beast. His hands and teeth matching the pattern with bites and one hand ending up again on John's throat.

"Say it. I want to hear it again. Say you won’t leave me."

"The day I leave you is the day I die Bob." With a last unforgiving thrust Bob claims John in the same way John did him so many times before while John spends himself over the two of them. With the rush gone the tightening in Bob's chest releases itself without warning. The tears come involutory, John is quick in placing Bob into a more comfortable position. 

"Pardon me, I should't have- does your neck hurt? Your chest... I think I bit too hard." With force John cups Bob's entire face in his large hands placing a single tender kiss on the tip of Bob's nose. 

"Did it feel right? Did you enjoy it?" Bob thinks for a second and then nods as good as he can in this grip.

"So did I. I love you Bob and if you want things to go this way more often then-"

"I don't think that is going to happen again any time soon." John laughs first and since his laugh is contagious Bob can not hold himself back and laughs too. 

"I meant what I said tough."

"I know, there is nothing your stubborn head won't do, my King."

-------------

To John's demise but not surprise, Bob was not very great with the sword nor the pistol. For the last five years John tried. First introducing Bob to the sword, he brought him one with a small handle and a thin blade, but nothing could compensate for his lack of balance. And the pistol? Well aiming at your target with your eyes closed being afraid of the loud bang and recoil guarantees a 99 percent chance of missing.

Some men are just not made for wars, John thought to himself while looking at Bob who was still shaking from nearly 30 attempts to hit his target. The clay jar was completely unharmed. 

That didn't matter now, it couldn’t. Right before a battle there is no room for regrets or doubts.

"Bob, are you ready? Ready for the rest of your life to begin?" John gently stroked Bob's face with the outside of his hand tugging a strain of hair behind his ear.

"Yes- Yes I am ready." John placed a kiss on Bob's forehead, heeling to leave, Bob grabbing his hand. 

"John please promise me. Promise me you will not leave me." 

"Again, this will not be our last shared moment. I promise you we will spend so many more days together that you will eventually become sick of me."

Shortly before they arrived at Bob's future Kingdom, John thought about his decision to no longer insist on Bob learning how to fight properly again but there was no turning back now. At the very least Bob put on some weight so that he didn't look like a straw in a field anymore.

The small army of men trying to make a difference against the wild pirate-crew was poorly trained. And John was right. The king, Bob's father was in fact a lousy regent, his defense weak. 

Only three days later at dawn they conquered the capital and made their way towards to the king's castle.  

The others go right around and check for defense. A few king guards were taken down. John didn't trust the situation. He wouldn't believe the king had so few men to protect the castle and John was right. 

Someone let the gate down and there they were. Over hundred men standing shoulder to shoulder reading to fight the intruders. Disgust running through John, so many men to protect the castle and the King so little to protect the town. He didn't have a lot of time to think about it because the guards were already coming at them. 

John grabbed Bob by his collar, doing his best to shield him.

"Sword in both hands Bob, I fear you will need it this time." 

Adrenalin rushed through both men. John standing tall before Bob. 

Swords were clicking, blood was spilled. People got taken down. Mostly kingsguards but also some of their crew. John never loses his focus on Bob, to his own disadvantage. 

The blade from the kingsguard in front of him made its way across his torso. The scream he let out changed something in Bob. 

Unconsciously Bob pushed John to the side and shot the guard directly into his chest. The body landed on the ground with a thud.  

From this point on Bob was no longer scared. Next to John he slaughtered the men who had an impact on making his life hell. He was messy and from time to time John had to take over to make sure the target was completely down and not only wounded. 

The last guard knelt on the blood soaked ground. Bob pointed his sword directly at his throat. 

"Where are they?"

"Prince Robert I beg you, I have my wife and children at home please spare me." The eyes of the men before him were filled with tears, his whole body shaking. 

"You will be spared, now speak, where are they?"

"There hiding in the dungeons my Prin-"

The man's throat was covered in his own blood mid-sentence.  Bob felt John's intense glare on him without looking back at him.

"He didn't care about his family when I told him to stop the night I turned eighteen." 

There was no time for sentiments now. They were still at war but John wished he could pull Bob into his arms right now, giving him all the comfort he deserves.  

While Bob and John made their way into the great hall the other crew members started looking for the king and queen and remaining guards. 

They were staring at the pompous throne at the end of the hall. 

"I will let them build a second one for you."

Because of the adrenaline going through his veins Bob didn't noticed that the sword put more damage on John than he would admit. John fell to his knees, his upper body doubled over in pain. 

"No no no no no, John just a little longer we’re nearly done. We are nearly where we dreamed to be. You and me, together."

"Bob I will be fine, just do what you have to do."

Bob wanted to say something but the remaining crew came back from the dungeons with the king and queen, in chains.

With a deep breath bob pulled himself together, for them. In long, dragging steps he made his way over to his parents. His heavy footsteps echoing through the great hall. He stopped right in front of them. 

His gaze was serious, eyebrows folded deep. This was the moment he fantasized about. For the last few years he dreamed about this nearly every night. He thought about what he would say and do. Finally getting his revenge. His head turned right, to his mother. She looked tired, her eyes as empty as Bob’s used to be.

"Nothing in my life will change if you're here or at the end of the world. You will never set a foot in this kingdom ever again. I promise you safe conduct till the border of the kingdom. From then on, you will be on your own."

He is not sure if his mother is even listening but before he can repeat his words, she is dragged out by the two crew members holding her. 

Bob's gaze lands his father, kneeling before him. Slowly he squats down, his whole body tense from the fight. The silence is deafening, unbearable until his father dears to speak.

"My son. My only child.  You came back to-"

The first punch did hurt after a few repeats; his fist went numb. So did his mind. The next thing he registers is someone talking to him. He can't see straight everything is blurry.

"It's done Bob, it's done. You need to calm down. We brought John into a chamber, the healer will take care of him. You come with me." He feels that he is getting dragged somewhere, his body bumps into something soft, then complete darkness. 

When he shoots awake he has no sense of direction. He stumbles and feels some fabric and pulls it to the side. The curtain reveals the dark night as the moon floods the room with its light. 

When he walks through the corridors of the castle he is still in the clothes he wore in battle. A scream told him where to run. The wooden doors opened, hitting the wall behind them. 

John was spread on a table, blood and sweat covering his body. The tears on his face falling like waterfalls. But before he can take a step closer someone pushes him right outside the door. 

"Just wait, we take care of him, we-"

Bob fisted the collar of the shirt from the person in front of him.

"I will stay." His words didn't left any room for arguments. Making his way back into the room. He thought he saw everything by now, that nothing could hurt him anymore, but this was something else. John, losing blood in so many places and so much of it, so many deep purple bruises. The room filled with nothing but his screams and heavy breathing.

And Bob stood there, horrified, guilt in every bone, but this wasn't about him. This time he needed to soak in a deep breath and stay calm. This one time he had to be the stronger person. So he choked it all down, his fears and the tears. Gently taking John's hand in his, breathing in a steady rhythm. 

"You will be fine my dare, everything will be fine." And for a second John believed him, then all he could see was how Bob turned into black allconsuming void. All he could feel was a slight tap on his cheek and the last thing he heard was a scream that wasn't his, ragged and bloodchilling, "You promised you won’t leave me!"

Six Months Later 

The golden sunlight fills the room. Through the thin windows the townsfolk can be heard, chattering, arguing, laughing. The smells of freshly baked sweets slip through the cracks of the stoned walls. 

The bedsheets slowly begin to ruffle. A deep jawn escapes Bob; he keeps his eyes closed at first, his hand wandering off to his side but it was cold and empty. Before he would fall back to sleep he decided it would be best to just leave the bed. 

Before he could even open the curtains fully, his servant storms in.

"My king, you're finally awake, we need to get you ready!" The servant made a fuss around Bob, placing the king's breakfast on the table. He then starts to warm up some water in the tub, while waiting for the water to heat up he starts picking out the clothes, his eyes again landing on the king who didn't move a finger. 

"My king? You don't like your breakfast? Should I get you something else? Or is your majesty not feeling well?"

Bobs seemed dazed off from the outside but the truth was he just wasn't sure how he felt. The fact that Bob didn't give an answer was enough for the servant a clear hint to not ask any further.

After the bath and Bob being tucked into his attire he and the servant left the chamber together. In the halls people were running around. The bakers carried cakes and tarts from one of the many tables to another. The ladies in waiting draped flowers over every wall, table and chair they could find. His servant was pulled by the side and Bob took it as his opportunity to escape this chaos. 

He made his way down the great hall, all the way to the exact opposite of the castle. His hand rose to knock on the door in front of him. 

"You can come in, when your name is not Bob."

"Are you trying to kill me? Why are you denying me access on this most beautiful of days."

John stepped closer seeing Bob's shadow peeking through the thick door. John rests his forehead against the old wood.

"You know. It's bad luck seeing each other before the ceremony right?"

Bob inches closer to the door, his forehead also resting against the wood now. 

"I can not believe that after everything we have been through, what we have seen, you still believe in superstitions."

They both started to laugh and tried to take in the others' presence as long as possible. 

"Bob, you have to go back, they need you."

"You know, we can still leave. We can sail away to unknown jungles or deserts. We can taste foreign fruits in our mouths and have the rough wind strike through our hair. For you I would-"

"I know, I know but think about them. Think about the people who suffered so much under the reign of your father. Don't they deserve someone who takes care of them, someone who is gentle and caring and fair?"

Bob understood, yes John was right but it still didn't sit well with Bob that it felt like an obligation. Hey would find a way to make everyone satisfied but right now he tried to only look a few hours ahead. 

"My Love, I will see you later. I can’t wait."

John stood there a little longer, Bob already gone. Smiling to himself like a fool. Yes he misses the sea deeply, but he would give every single drop of the ocean to spend a minute with Bob and that was all that counts. 

The sun was high in the sky. The halls were flooded with people from every corner of the kingdom and beyond. The ringing of the bells could be heard throughout the whole country. The ceremony was short as intended but the celebration afterwards was far from it.

Together they danced and sang until the sun already started to come out again. They sneaked away through the drunken and happy crowd back to their shared chambers both falling back first into the mattress. Their mouths find each other in an instant. 

"If I am being honest with you, I think I am way too tired for a first night." Bob, who was at least a little tipsy, couldn't hold back his laughter. To John it seemed it was the loudest and most purest one he ever heard from him so far.

"We had so many first nights and we will have so many in the future, I think we can skip this one."

They got rid of their festive robes and fell asleep tangled into each other just like they always did now from now on the two golden rings would keep them company.

Two Years Later 

"Where are you going?"

"I will visit the blacksmith and his family. They need help to patch up the roof of their house after the heavy storm yesterday."

Bob gave John an approving nod and turned back to writing. Bob knew that John was lying but it was okay. It was okay that he would visit the blacksmith for a short period of time and then he would head off to the kingdom's harbour. Watching for hours as the ships came and left, admiring every single one of them. 

At first Bob was a little hurt that John didn't tell him. On the other hand Bob sent someone after John to observe him. Not because Bob actually thought John would have something with someone else. He was worried about John. After he heard that John would occasionally go to the harbour, Bob started to pick up on his plans.

On one peculiar night John stole himself back into their shared chambers. He didn't expect for his husband to still be awake at such an ungodly hour. 

"My King, I apologize if I kept you awake with my absence." 

"Shut it John. Might tell me where you've been in the secureness of the dark?" 

"I told you I would help the baker fix his-" 

"Oh I know you did. The baker sent his acknowledgements, he also told me that you finished the oven shortly before the sun started to settle. So I am asking you again, where were you?"

"I was down at the docks." 

"Having some fun at the taverns? So you're fooling around while I drown under my duties?" 

The late hours are partly to blame for what John does now. He drops to his knees, his hands buried in Bob's robe.

"I would never do such thing. You will not find a drop of alcohol on me I just-" 

Guilt stings in Bob's chest, this was supposed to be a light tease not a proper accusation. 

"Get up from your knees John, I am just messing with you. I already know, for quite some time to be honest." 

"Why didn't you say something I don't want to anger you." 

"You could never. It is my pride you struck. Don't you trust me?" 

"This isn't about trust. I don't want to be another burden on your shoulders, another thought haunting the corners of your mind." 

"But I don't want you to suffer, John, quite the opposite." 

"What have you come up with now?"

-------------

"Bob, I am not sure if that is a good idea." John makes a pause ringing with himself not sure how well Bob will receive the following words.

"All of it. I mean letting the townsfolk choose your successor is one thing but with you, with us leaving, the kingdom would be unprotected and vulnerable." 

"We will come back." 

"And still you would be gone for a year." 

"John this conversation is purely for you to be informed I already made the decision." 

John opens his mouth and closes it again keeping his thoughts to himself. "As stubborn as a god damn mule."

The town is covered in pamphlets the next day. -Every woman and man shall think wisely in proposing a worthy successor. They will take on the burden and rule the kingdom in the absence of the King and beyond. They shall be of age and a reflection of what the people need and want.-

Bob was worried at first that this venture would confuse the people or even worse would lead to an outrageous revolt but quite the opposite happened. Two weeks after the announcement in the middle of the marketplace stood a young woman with raven hair and blue eyes nervously tugging at the hem of her dress. There wasn't even a need for a tournament, The clear majority voted for her, Kate. 

For the next months Bob did everything he could to teach her the things that are important to rule a kingdom and sooner that anticipated John and Bob could set sail. 

They were just making the final preparations when Bob could see it in John's eyes, the same look he gave him years ago in the cabin every time he spoke about his past, the same look short before they conquered the kingdom. 

"John, I beg you, please trust me."

"This is about everything but trust. So many things can happen. We could drown in a heavy storm, we could get attacked, robbed and shot."

"I have to wonder why you now seem to care about all those things after all those years on sea before."

John takes a deep breath and with every following word he exhales the air. 

"It didn't matter before. It was just me. Now, I am worried about you."

"As long as I am with you I am not scared, whether of obstacles, dangers or death." 

Bob reaches his hand out, John takes it without a second thought and so they enter the wild unruly sea together. 

------------------------------------------

Do you like happy endings? Great, then stop reading because now it gets angsty. 

You've been warned.

------------------------------------------

Twenty years seems like a long time right? Well, when our time comes to an end, we will almost ever wish for more. These were King Bob's thoughts while laying next to his beloved. John's years on sea were catching up to him. His back and limps hurt, tying him to the bed. His heart beats in uneven patterns. The physicians said there is no such thing as a cure. The healers said they should cherish their remaining days together. They were giving him two more years. It wasn't easy for Bob to watch John suffer, two years of almost never leaving the bed. Two years always being on the edge that their current moment could be their last, together. At the end John made it to three and a half. 

"Bob?" John's voice was thick and raspy, and still the sweetest of sounds in Bob's ears. 

"This is the night I will break my promise." Bob knew this day would come but still nothing could prepare him for the sting in his heart and the emptiness in his lungs. He tried to be strong for both of them. Taking his lover's hand without saying a single word, there was nothing more left to say, the only sound in the room was John's heavy breathing until it wasn't and loud silence filled the room. 

Hours passed Bob not leaving John's side. Not letting go of his hand. Bob didn't remember who pulled him out of the bed. It didn't matter, nothing did anymore. 

Usually royals were buried in a family grave, but not John. John was a man of the sea and so his body was placed on a boat. It was Bob who set it alight so his Love could leave this life as he lived it. With the deep ocean under his feet. 

Bob tried so hard. Talking to his friends, well it was more them talking to him while his mind wandered off. He went to the library a lot but couldn't bring himself to read a single book, only strolling through the endless rows of shelves. He ate but never enough. His face faltered, his bones poking beneath his skin something that didn't happen anymore since he met John.

John's death anniversary came fast. Bob was alone at the shore staring at the open sea when he made his final decision.

For the following year Bob had a lot of meet ups with Kate making sure the role as queen wouldn't become too much on her. He attended festivities, he sang, danced and wrote. He wrote everything down from his first encounter with John to every adventure they lived through.  A week before John's second death anniversary Bob was finished. It was the middle of the night, everyone except the King was fast asleep. The King made his own bed and left a sealed letter on his bedside table. He greeted the few people he met while walking around the castle with a polite nod. Then he went down to the coast, the breeze warm and salty welcoming him like an old friend. He already left his crown in his chambers. He took off his sand-filled shoes and let his robe fall from his body in a single motion. 

When the water reaches his toes a small but genuine smile forms on his lips. While taking one step after another his eyes never lose focus on the open sea in front of him until it vanishes and he is met with the same glacier blue eyes he fell in love with all those years ago. 

His eyes widen, his pulse rises till he hears his own heartbeat in his ear, he lives alone he shouldn't hear a voice here, in the kitchen, in the middle of the night. Now he stood there with the bottle in hand, not able to move.

"I said, do it!" Instead of the cabin the bottle shattered on the tiles, glass and liquid spreading in every direction but that will be a problem for tomorrow.

He sprinted back to his bedroom, locking the door from within. If it was an intruder they could just take what they want and leave, but the chances were much higher that it was Robert's own mind playing games with him.

Instead of tugging himself under his sheets, he kneels, his hands neatly folded on the mattress praying for the voices to stop.

The next morning he cleans the kitchen floor and is grateful that none of the tiles were broken. The visit to the doctor was quite useless, just as he thought.

Diagnosis, withdrawal symptoms and the sleep deprivation just plays right into it. Given his background the doctor couldn't prescribe Robert sleeping pills, instead the doctor handed him a box of lavender tea.

Robert spends the rest of his day in the community garden to distract himself. In the early afternoon Ms Mitchell pays him a visit.

"Father Reynolds, it's good to see you outside of this old church." Ms Mitchell was properly one of the oldest people in this town, never shy to speak her mind.

"Ms Mitchell just when I thought this day couldn't get any better you come around."

He rises from the ground he just knelt on and offers her a simple, short bow. Now she could see him fully, the sleepless nights showing on his face especially under his eyes.

"You're such a charmer. Is everything well dear?”"

For a second he thinks about telling her the truth, the look she gives him holds the promise of zero judgment but he doesn't want to bother her.

"Everything’s been good so far. I think this town took a liking in me, or at least I hope so."

"Oh don’t worry dear, everybody here loves you." A sign of relief forms on his lips. "Thank you for your service father. I need to leave now and have a good sleep later. It looks like you need it."

He just laughs politely and watches her leave. Ms Mitchell silently prays that Father Reynolds will not disappear like the ones that came before him.

He drank one, then half an hour later a second cup, when he reached the bottom of his third he had mentally given up. Convinced that not even anesthesia could put him to sleep. He made himself comfortable under the sheets and then to his own surprise, drifted into a welcomed darkness.

When he opened his eyes he was not in his bedroom anymore, he was in his childhood bedroom. Without being able to do anything about it he goes down the stairs.

That's when he hears it, the loop of his dads belt landing right on Robert's back. He was ten and failing miserably in school and in his fathers eyes, a beating was the right way to get some sense into his son.

Everything inside Robert wants to walk away, to scream. Instead his feet carry him closer to the scene. He passes his mother who covers her ears with both hands.

Then he sees himself, his way too thin body, the familiar fear in his eyes.

Robert lets his gaze wander over the scene and spots something, a creature which doesn't belong in this picture. Before he can say or do anything his Dad lets go of his younger version and turns to his present self.

"What is it Bobby? Still scared of a little discipline?"

Robert jumps backwards protecting his face with his hands as if it's still second nature, the scene slowly vanishes and everything turns to a suffocating darkness.

"Why are you doing this to me!" He shouts, at who? He doesn't know but he repeats it until he shoots awake, real this time.

His brown locks cling to his forehead, his grey shirt is covered in dark spots. The worst part, it's still not even midnight.

The warm water washes away his sweat and eases his mind a little. He rests his forehead on the cold tiles, looking down at himself then slowly closing his eyes, thinking about a way to clear his mind and relax his body for some time. The voice made itself present again.

"Poor Robert, too ashamed to get himself a little relief." The voice was mocking him but this time Robert will speak up even if it was with his eyes closed.

"Are you the one haunting my dreams?"

"Oh what a bright spark you are. Tell me Robert, since you're afraid to touch yourself should I help you out?"

Now this was different, Robert actually felt something. He felt a cold hand on his lower back. At first it felt like the palm of a hand until it turned into something sharp.

In a rush of panic Bob turns around screaming at the top of his lunges. "Whatever you are, stay away from me! You are banned from this room, this house, these grounds!"

Robert peeks one eye open and to his horror he sees no one. Nothing but a chuckle echoes through the room and everything is quiet again. Looking down on himself, Robert now had a new problem.

He stayed longer under the shower than intended and went back to bed. He was not sure if he was actually sleeping but how else would he explain what just saw.

It was an old memory, one Robert hoped the drugs and alcohol took with them.

When he was a teenager he was desperate more often than not. Never able to find a stable supplier. So one night a man promised to get him some for an exchange.

It was always an exchange. Bob can remember how cold he was from kneeling in this dark alleyway, how long it took since the man clearly had some problems with keeping his dick up.

He remembers how dirty he felt when the stranger came down his throat. The fix he got afterwards let him forget it in no time.

Without being able to do anything else he steps a little closer. That's when he realized this was not the man from his memories. No the man had black hair, was not as tall and definitely more chubby than the man Robert saw now.

The man who now stood in front of his younger self was taller than Robert, muscular with broad shoulders and instead of ramming his dick inside Robert's mouth he gently stroked over his cheeks keeping a slow almost sensual rhythm.

Robert could feel his pants tighten. His hand mindlessly wanders to his own dick applying pressure. This was wrong, this whole scene shouldn't turn him on, he shouldn't touch himself while watching himself.

At the same time he thought that this was all just a dream, nothing of this was real, so he let go.

His hand in his pants, covering his mouth with the other. When he feels himself coming close, the scene vanishes again.

When he blinks his eyes open his hand is covered in his cum. His chest rapidly falls up and down. His throat is as dry as the desert.

The next day he makes himself busy putting up more crosses around the house and for the next few days nothing out of the ordinary happens, until Sunday.

One of his duties as a priest was to sit in the confessional booth and forgive the confessed sins. It were always the same people. Some who had thoughts about someone outside of their marriage, some alcoholics and on occasion, someone who viewed not washing your hands before dinner as a sin.

Everything went on as usual, Robert was right at leaving the booth thinking that was it for the day until the door of the other side opened and closed.

All of a sudden the air felt different, heavy and cold.

Robert tries to identify who just sat down. All he sees is a glimpse of strawberry blond hair and a shirt that didn't seem to be from this century.

Robert clears his throat gesturing for the other man to start his confession.

"Forgive me Father, I have sinned."

The voice scratches something in Robert's brain but he can't quite place it.

"Tell me your sins and you may be forgiven, son."

"I have layed with a man, Father. And now I have improper thoughts about another." There was not a single bit of remorse in the confession and Robert was sure that the man was smiling but it didn't matter.

"It is stated by the bible that a man shall not lay with another man but it is also stated that the lord loves all of his creations equally. Now Son, you are forgiven."

"But Father, I can not stop these thoughts."

Robert soaked in a deep breath "Tell me about these thoughts sometimes if we share our sins they lessen. God loves all his creations equally."

He heard a small huff from the man.

"Well father, I think about my hand roaming around his body, coming to a stop on his neck. I think about my hand taking his clothes off till nothing is left except his bare, naked body under mine. I think about my lips leaving marks on his sweet and soft neck."

It was safe to say that Robert was now completely caught in those thoughts too.

"I think about kissing his soft lips while I enter myself inside him. I think about the way he would moan out my name, his locks clinging to his forehead, his fingernails digging into my back."

Robert was a mess, single streaks of sweat appeared on his forehead with his mouth slightly open.

"The worst part is that I think about spending myself inside of him, my hand covering his cute little cross tattoo right over his hip."

Unconsciously Robert's hand wanders down to his own hip until he remembers that he in fact has a tattoo of a cross, right there. Roberts' gut is twisting like hell. He never told everyone in his life that he has a tattoo to begin with.

"What is it Father? Don’t like what you just heard?"

When Robert came back to his senses he pulled away the metallic divider, again there was no one, the other side of the booth was empty.

He ran into his small office. Pulling a cigarette from one of the drawers of his desk with shaking hands. He lits the cigarette with the same matches he uses for the candles in the church.

He stopped right in front of his mouth but again the voice urged him, tempted him.

"Do it Robert. Nobody is watching, nobody will know."

And he does, the drag is long and his lunges fill with smoke. After he exhales, the consequences of his actions appear. He vomits right into the empty bucket standing in the corner, hearing a distant laugh. This has to come to an end, one way or another.

It never occurred to him to question it but now he was curious and a little paranoid. He wanted to know what this church actually was, when it was built, what happened on its grounds.

He finds himself at the local library. He asks for every book in relation to the church, there are two to be exact.

The first one is filled with dates and building information. The second one was a book about the town in general. The church building was built around the late 18th century but before that around 1630 a single witch tribunal had been held on the ground it now stood on.

-Jonathan F. Walker was probably in his late twenties to early thirties when he was accused of adultery and the act of laying with another man. Since he refused to speak on his behalf he was found guilty on the same day of his testimony. He was burned alive the day after.-

Robert turns the page, it's a hand drawn caricature of the ritual. A man with wild hair, his upper body bound to a flock, surrounded by logs with bursting flames.

It physically hurt Rober to look at it and he could swear that the man was staring right back at him.

A shrill voice shakes him out of his thoughts.

"Father, the library closes in ten."

Robert nods, burrows the book and takes it home.

Sitting on his kitchen chair he reads over the same paragraphs again and again.

He then gets completely lost in the caricature, his finger trailing over the black lines. A wave of sadness floods him, this man didn't deserve to die for what he did, especially not this way.

Maybe this Jonathan Walker was the voice tempting him, plaguing his dreams, as revenge. Now what was Robert supposed to do about it?

The candles were lit, a pentagram drawn on the floor with white chalk. His bible in one hand, a thick wooden cross in the other, his rosary around his neck.

-------------

This was probably the stupidest idea anyone ever had, summoning the demon that already haunts you, but it was the best idea he could come up with and that speaks for itself.

"In the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit I summon you to show yourself Jonathan Walker!"

At first nothing happened, then a strong wind blew out the candles, the windows and doors were all closed. After what felt like an eternity the candles lit up again without Robert doing anything.

There he stood, his hair falling a little in his face, his sapphire blue eyes piercing right through Robert. The man wore a smug grin on his face.

All what Jonathan Walker could see was a Priest, shaking from head to toe holding onto his holy relics as if they could protect him.

"Congratulations Father Reynolds you caught me, what now?." He didn't mean anything he said sincerely, he made it sound like a sick game of hide and seek.

Robert just stood there still in shock but determined to carry on with his plan.

"I want to know- I want to know why you're doing all of this to me?"

"What exactly do you mean Father?" Oh John knew exactly what he meant but why not have a little fun before devouring his dinner.

"I mean the dreams and the-the temptations." The freshest winter snow would look dark next to Robert's face, pale as if he has seen a ghost. Technically he is seeing one so his reaction is justified.

John just pouts his lips and shrugs his shoulders, which confuses Robert even more.

"Well I summoned you to help you to let go of your past and to finally step over, finding the peace you deserve."

John starts to laugh with his whole heart, if there still is one.

"Why are you laughing? I am granting you your final rest. Confess your sins and you will be granted eternal peace and rest."

"Sure Father I confess. My wife and I loved each other for a long time until we didn’t. We both found someone new but I was not careful enough, times were different. So I was burned at the stakes for being in love."

Robert had to swallow hard. This was an honest confession even though John seemed to find it amusing. To Bob, this man never did anything wrong, nothing he would need forgiveness for. John becomes impatient at the silence.

"Father Robert, I am here because I want to. You know, they send the Priests here they want to get rid of. Wife beaters, pedophiles, drug addicts and normally I do them the favour. But you're different, you're not a bad person, you're just not what they expect from you."

"Then why not leave me alone?"

"Oh because you're way too pretty. I want to have my fun with you. You look even prettier when you're scared, the way your mouth opens and your eyes widen, I could watch this every fucking day."

John steps out of the circle which was supposed to trap him. With every word closing the distance between him and Robert. Now their mouths were just millimeters away from each other.

John licks devilish over his own lips while Bob comes to terms with his life hoping his death will be quick.

"Oh god."

"I don’t think he can't help you now Bobby."

John pushes Bob onto the table behind him. Pining his upper body down with one hand while getting rid of Bob's pants with the other.

"Oh it seems someone is already sinning."

John lets his index finger drag over Bob’s still covered bulge and then tears the remaining shorts down.

Poor Bob didn’t stand a chance. John must have been blessed with incredible strength in his past life.

John drags his sharp nails over Bob's tights, which makes him whimper in a mix of pain and pleasure.

"Something to remember tomorrow."

Bob decides it's best for him to fix his gaze on the ceiling, maybe he fell asleep at some point. Then he feels John tongue on his cock and it hits him. This is definitely not a dream.

John wastes no time and takes Bob length in completely, the overwhelming sensation makes Bob jolt in pleasure, which earns him a hard push, back on the table.

"Oh god–"

"Not god Bobby, John"

"John I can’t please this is-" John's long, thick fingers find their way into Bob's mouth and without giving it a second thought Bob sucks on them as if his life depends on it.

John never falters from his relentless pace, no wonder that Bob approaches his high earlier than John anticipated.

"I can feel that you're close Bobby, let go for me." Bob shakes his head in a frantic no and lets John's fingers fall from his mouth.

Bob nearly chokes on his own words, his fingernails digging into the wooden table. "Forgive me father for I am about to sin! Oh-Oh god-"

John just rolls his eyes at Bob's words while Bob shamelessly spends himself down his throat.

The moan that escapes Bob's mouth indicates that his high is kind of painful is. John places small kisses on Bob's abdomen as a reparation, especially on that cute tattoo over his hip, still Bob doesn't open his eyes, he didn't dare to.

The next thing that Robert registers is the tickle of sunlight on his nose. A short gaze to his alarm clock, 8 am. For the first time in a long time he slept kinda good.

He sits up and a sharp pain runs over his right leg. He flips away the blanket, long and deep, red scratches are revealed to him.

Something to remember the next morning.

Panicked he made his way downstairs seeing the pentagram, the fallen candles. As his eyes wander across the room he realizes that all the crucifixes and crosses are upside down.

Without thinking he finds himself under the shower, the boiling hot water making his skin go red.

-------------

For the next few days John didn't show up. Bob started to question his sanity, maybe he hallucinated and harmed himself in the process.

Then Sunday mass came, Robert stood on the pulpit preaching the words of the lord to those who would listen and between them sat John smirking up at him.

Good thing that Robert's robe was at least one size too big.

Afterwards he sat in the confession booth but he couldn't listen properly. Too scared or maybe too excited that John would pay him a visit and of course he did.

Bob was already a mess when John stepped inside the part of the where he sat.

John gently pats his head seeing that tears were already forming in Bob's eyes.

"If I didn't know any better, it seemed like you were waiting for me."

He wanted to protest, he really did but John was so fast. Already pinning Bob's hands over his head, against the wall of the booth. Opening his own pants and pulling his dick out then forcing Bobs mouth open with his fingers.

"Come on Bobby, don’t go prude on me now. What was it you said? God loves all his creations equally? He will also have some love left for my favourite whore."

While fighting for air Bob opens his mouth just the tiniest bit but it's enough for John to push all the way in.

"Oh wow Bobby, you feel great. It makes me really wonder what your ass will feel like."

John doesn't let Bob do anything, he just uses his mouth as he pleases. Making sure that Bob would not go unconscious, that would ruin all the fun. John can’t help but admire the view beneath him.

"Has someone ever told you that you're a really pretty cryer, Bobby?" Now sobs came into the mix, it was almost heartbreaking but John knew that Bob wanted this, if not he wouldn't even be able to touch him in the first place.

John reduces his speed a little giving Bob a chance to get some air into his lunges. Unintentionally John's free hand wanders to Bob's rosy cheek, placing tender strocks till Bob leans into the touch.

"Take all of it Father, it's just for you."

Bob nods a little too eager, pressing his eyes closed as he waits for John to finish. John's growl echo filthy through the booth back into Bobs ears, as John comes. As the ever eager the please person Bob was, he swallowed every drop John gave him.

"Open." Without thinking Bob obeys, sticking out his tongue. John inspected his mouth, pleased with the resault.

The last thing Bob feels before passing out from the overwhelm is a slight pat on his cheek.

This time it's still dark outside when Robert wakes up from coughing. His throat hurts like hell, he drowns the water in mere seconds. He can not remember putting it on the nightstand in the first place.

-------------

You are disgusting! A pig! A faggot! A disgrace!

The words his father used to say to him hammer through his head. Robert feels dirty, sinful, like a disgrace. To help the feelings go away he does what he always does.

Robert buries himself in prayers and punishes himself with restrictive eating. Just as his parents showed him when he was a kid.

Soon it doesn't feel like enough. He has a wooden ruler in the drawer of his desk and he uses it, mostly on the backside of his hands and fingers. Much to the dislike of John, still he did not intervene at first.

The days dragged on and Robert fell into a deep hole of making himself as miserable as possible. Now John stopped plaguing his dreams but Bob starved himself of sleep on purpose now.

One day Robert sat in his office actively cutting his skin with the letter opener. That was the last straw for John, didn't even knew that they could be this sharp. It was a strange sight, Bob hurled over, whispering verses while his blood dropped to the floor.

"What are you doing?"

"What do you think I am doing?" John aggressively pulled the opener out of Bob's hand.

"This needs to stop, you're killing yourself."

"Why do you care?"

"When you're so desperate for a punishment I will do it."

John grabs Bob by his hair and yanks him over the desk.

"How many do you think you deserve?"

"Thirty?"

"I’ll make it sixty then and read out loud, if you stutter I will start all over again."

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ."

"For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight."

"Please John tell me we are already halfway through."

"Oh Bobby, we are at fifteen." John's voice covered in faux-sympathy.

Bob swallows, takes a deep breath and then continues.

"In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves."

"In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace."

"Good Bobby, now repeat it until I am finished with you."

After forty Bob was a babbling mess, the sentences cut short but that was okay as long as he internalized the words.

"Bobby, we're done now, you can stop." But that was easier said than done. Bob repeated the words like a broken record. John squeezes his face and forces Bob to look at him, that gets him to stop.

"You did well Bobby but there is life after the punishment."

Bob just nods in agreement and John places a soft, almost tender kiss on Bob’s temple.

John pulls Bob's clothes back into place and sits him down on his chair, seeing that a white spot has formed on the lower half of his robe. John just shakes his head in amusement.

"No more self-punishment, understood?"

By the way his ass was hurting. What else could Bob do than to agree?

After John left, Robert sat there for a while watching the leaves from the big oak blowing in the wind.

He ate a little more than necessary that evening. The water from the showerhead is not too warm, not too cold, it's just right. His sleep is filled with sweet dreams.

-------------

"Father Reynolds, is everything prepared for the ceremony tomorrow? Is there something you need from us?" Tom Westborough tears Robert out of his daydream.

"Sure thing Tom, everything is ready for tomorrow, you can leave." The younger man head on his heal and leaves the church with the brightes smile on his face and Robert couldn't help but smile too.

"He is pretty, don’t you think?"

"He is getting married tomorrow."

"I didn't hear a no, Father."

"Watch your mouth John, you are still in a church."

"Oh come on why are you so tense? You know that envy is a sin too?"

"I don’t envy them, I worry about them, for them."

"Why? They are not the first two men getting married under the hand of the church."

"I know, but there are crazy people out there, I just don't want anything to happen to them."

Every word carried a deep note of sincereness, John could hear it. How can one have so much compassion for others but none for himself?

John did not attend the wedding, something Robert was grateful for. Everything went smooth and after the ceremony ended, Robert retreated to his home.

Long social events always demand a lot of him. At least he got a reason to wear his festive robe instead of the plain black one.

A bright, clean white with golden hand stitched applications. He looked at himself a little too long in the mirror, also taking note of the grey strains becoming more and more present. Just when he was about to take the robe off, a hand stopped his.

"No, keep it on, you look beautiful."

He left no room for argument, his mouth already attacking Bob's neck. John spreads Bob's legs with his own which causes Bob's upper body to fall over.

His hands now positioned left and right on the mirror, his back arching giving John a perfect angle of his ass.

Bob just wanted to look behind himself but John pushed his head forward.

"Look at yourself while I take care of you."

Bob feels his robe being pushed up to his back, his legs already started to shake.

"John, I don't know if I can do this."

"I know you can, Bobby. Just stay focused on keeping your pretty hands on the mirror." Were John's last words before his mouth got to work on Bob's ass.

First John bites and pulls on his cheeks leaving a good amount of marks but patience has never been John's strongest suit. His tongue wandered to Bob's hole.

The moans falling out of Bob's mouth like a waterfall were deep, sinful and music to John's ears.

At some point John can feel that Bob's muscles start to give in while at the same time his breath starts to hitch.

John let go of Bob's right tight he clung on for support and stroked Bob's leaking cock instead. A cracked whine escapes Bob's lips; he looks down seeing what John does to him.

"John please I can't, it's too much."

"Eyes on the mirror Bobby, you don’t want me to stop right?"

Bob's head moves too fast, making him dizzy, John couldn't help it and let out a snort.

The thick white ropes of Bobs cum land directly on the lower part of the mirror. Bob nearly falls down to the ground but John catches him.

He gets Bob out of the robe and right into bed. To John, Bob looked like an angel while sleeping, with his curls smoothly laying over his forehead, his face soft and blushed, his lips slightly agape.

The next morning Bob reaches over to the other side of the bed and is greeted with more cold sheets. It was stupid to even think about it.

Bob stayed longer in bed than usual, not wanting to see the evidence of last night. The mirror. When he finally got up, a shy smile formed on his face, someone had already cleaned it up.

-------------

The next weeks were cruel. Robert pathetically waited for John to come back to him. He even catched himself getting hard just by the thought of John, of his hands, his fingers, and his mouth.

One night he had enough this stupid game and tried to provoke it. He brought a bottle of wine from the church over to his house and even put on his festive robe.

He just wanted it to be over. He wanted the constant feeling of being on the edge to go away, that's what Robert told himself.

He fills a wine glass halfway full and slowly moves it to his mouth but before he can take a sip he feels a presence behind him.

"Are you this desperate Bobby? You would really break your five year streak just to get my attention?"

The cold breath sent a shiver down Bob's spine. He sat the glass down on the table and turned around to John, landing on his knees.

"Please, I can’t do this any longer. Make it go away, please. This feeling, I can’t bear it anymore."

Oh the smug grind on John's face goes from one ear to the other. He had Bob right where he wanted him, on his knees, begging for him, praying for him, for John.

John gently moves the back of his hands over Bob's cheek, who then leans into the touch as if John was his only chance of salvation.

"I gave you time because I thought you weren't ready."

"I am- I am ready John, please."

John pulls Bob up and carries him to his bedroom, Bob's gaze never leaves John's face.

John's soft side was gone as fast as it came. He practically throws Bob into the bed positioning himself over him, trapping him between his legs.

His hands smoothly glided into Bob's hair, their lips crashing into each other. John's tongue doesn’t need permission to enter Bob’s mouth, he willingly lets him in. While John gives Bob time to breathe his mouth wanders down to Bob's neck. Leaving bruises as purple as a pure amethyst.

"I can not believe that you made yourself all pretty just for me." The whisper makes Bob shudder.

"I thought I should make it special since it’s my first-."

John's eyebrow rises, his smile drops.

"You are not going to tell me that you're a virgin, right?"

The red on Bob's cheeks turned from a soft pink to a full on red.

"I thought you knew. I had a not so pleasant night with a girl back in school. It was painful for me to keep him up, I came with my eyes closed, thinking about Henry from biology."

"And while-"

"I never took it beyond oral."

John sat back staring down at Bob, for the first time in a long time a conflict started to form in his mind. The silence thick between them until Bob gives his chest a slight push.

"Damn it John, I am a grown ass man. I think I can take it."

John's eyes darkened, the blue replaced with pitch black he bares his teeth and for a sweet second Bob regrets his last sentence. The fact that, with his words, he basically offered himself.

John's hands find their way under Bob's robe placing gentle circles around his nipples, Bob could have come from the stimulation alone but John had other plans. With one hand he pulls the robe over Bob's head and his mouth replaces his fingers.

"Can you- can you take your shirt off too?" Bob's voice is quiet and shaky but John gives in to his request.

Bob blinked several times in a row, maybe this demon of a man will be the death of him but it will be definitely worth it.

John's hands quickly get rid of Bob's boxers. His mouth landed back on his hole while his fingers found their way into Bob's mouth.

Way too early to Bob’s liking, John pulls his fingers out of his mouth only to press them where his tongue currently is. Slowly he pushes his index finger inside.

"Oh god, John"

Bob was already falling apart on one finger and John devoured every second of it.

After sometime, with three fingers, John had to check in if Bob was still present grabbing his face roughly with his free hand.

"You're still with me? We can save the rest for the next time."

"For heaven's sake John, don’t fucking stop."

John chuckles at that and pulls his fingers out, the loss making Bob whimper.

"Don’t worry Father, I will make you see heaven tonight."

Bob was pretty sure that John would break him in half. His fingers weren't enough, nothing could have prepared him for this.

His back arched way off the bed, his screams choked halfway in his throat, his grip on the bedsheets made his knuckles go white and still he wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

"Shit Bobby, I knew that you would feel so good around me." John's voice is deep, otherworldly and hides a little of desperation.

When John was all the way buried inside he gave Bob time to adjust but it became too much quickly.

"John I swear to god, start moving." It was more a plea than an actual command both of them knew that.

"Aw a pretty Priest praying for my cock to spit him open. What did I do to deserve this?" On the last word he pulls out and pushes all the way in again hitting Bob's sweet spot. Bob's hands fly to John's back, his nails digging into his skin an attempt to anchor himself.

After a few repeats John finds a steady, merciless rhythm. The wall behind Bob's bed will need some fixing tomorrow that is for sure.

Maybe it's been minutes or maybe hours, both of them are too far gone to know. At some point John takes Bob's legs and presses them further up to Bob's torso.

With the new angle John hit even deeper, the last bit of air escaped Bob's lungs. Tears falling down his cheeks mixing with John’s and his own sweat.

"There he is, my pretty cryer you’ve been so good the whole time I think you deserve a reward."

Bob just sobs as a response and bats his eyes at John who then takes up speed. Bob's knees were nearly at the same height as his ears when John made sure that Bob came all over his stomach while John spent himself deep inside Bob.

John lowers Bob's body back into place still buried deep inside him, he leans forward carefully licking Bob's tears from his face.

When John pulls out a huge amount of his cum drops out of Bob which makes him whimper even more.

Bob doesn't dare to open his eyes, too scared that he will be alone when he opens them. This and the fact that his body was completely worn out made him fall asleep in an instant.

To his surprise, when he wakes up he feels a familiar breath from behind on his neck but he doesn't turn around.

"You’re still here?"

"I may be a demon but I am not a monster."

Bob looks down on his own body seeing the scratches and bitemarks.

"Are you sure about that? Wait, what time is it?"

"It's only nine, relax."

Bob just shifted closer into John's embrace when a rush of panic flooded through him.

"It’s fucking sunday, mass starts at ten."

Bob doesn't even make it halfway up till he falls back into the bed. His bottom is giving him a hard time.

"Stop, cut that fucking grin John. That is not funny."

"Well to me it is, let me help you."

In a heartbeat John stands in front of Bob lifting him up by his armpits.

"Great, now I feel like a wounded animal."

"If it helps, you also look like one."

While holding his mass today he couldn't count the time he corrected his collar, scared that someone would see John's bitemarks. Of course John sat in the corner and watched him the whole time, mocking him.

----------------

To John, a lot of things were funny such as Bob's fear of getting caught while doing something he shouldn't do. John could disappear at any time and that freaked Bob out, not that John would ever let Bob allow to get into such a situation.

On a cold February Sunday after mass and after his time in the confession booth Robert stood with his back to the altar, hovering over the lectern.

A firm hand gets a hold on his waist.

"John, leave. The church is still open, someone could come in and see us."

The hand wanders down lower, without looking, Bob grabs it.

"I said no John."

"Come on Bobby I know you want it too."

John's voice had a tendency to let Bob’s thoughts melt but not this time, this time Bob would stand his ground.

"John, I don't want this, not here."

John's hand already found the evidence that Bob was not telling the truth.

"Tsk tsk tsk, Father lying is a sin, you should know that." With that John pushes Bob's head on the lectern.

"Were you practicing some verses? Don’t mind me, go on."

At first Bob said nothing then John grabbed a fist full off his hair, yanking him back.

"I said go on." John spat the words right into Bob's ears.

And Bob did go on while John pushes his boxers down and lifts his robe up. Making sure that nobody except John could see Bob's holy skin.

With a trembling voice Bob repeats his new favourite verse while John slowly stretches him open from behind, his hands grabbing tight on Bob's waist.

"Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sin."

John stops for a second letting the words sink in, this stupid grin forming on his face again.

"Such sweet words only for me Father?"

"Fuck you."

"Oh wow now we are swearing in church? Not a lot of this god-fearing man left I see?"

In honesty Bob gave up on the thought of ever being granted to something even close to heaven. He already did after their first encounter.

Maybe he was doomed to spend his days like this but he was sure to enjoy every moment of it. He would never give John the satisfaction of telling him this though.

"Stop being so full of yourself and hurry before someone sees us."

John just snorts at his comment.

"You know what since you decided to be such a brat today, your wish is granted."

John's fingers leave Bob faster than he can think.

"No wait! I didn't mean it."

But John was already gone and Bob cursed himself internally. Now he stood in the middle of the church all flustered arching for John's touch.

-------------

The trick with the wine didn't work this time. Robert sat at the kitchen table swinging the liquid inside the glass for nearly an hour but John didn't come.

Defeated, Robert carries himself to his bedroom. There was one last thing he wanted to try.

Kneeling on the bed, his shirt discharged on the floor, his own hand slowly wanders over his neck, then over the length of his torso and finally he reaches between his legs.

With every touch, Bob made sure to let John’s name slip from his wet lips. When his hand slowly starts to stroke his cock his head falls back.

Bob titles his head a little. Has there always been a hook in the ceiling? With a creack of the wooden floor the thought is already gone.

John stands behind the bed, hands clenched into fists, eyes wide, filled with anger.

Bob doesn’t turn around to face John, instead his straight back, folds in.

"I-I am sorry for earlier. I shouldn’t have said that."

"And you think touching what doesn't belong to you is a good way to apologize? Look at you, even a kicked puppy has more dignity than you."

Bob feels the mattress dip behind him. His instinct screams at him to flee but he stays right where he is.

Now John's chest was pressed into his bare back, John's mouth with zero proximity to his ear.

"Hands over your head Bobby."

John took his sweet time, nothing rushed, no haste and it made Bob go insane.

Now Bob’s hands were bound over his head with the help from the hook John just put into the ceiling when Bob was still at the church. Bob was a little surprised that John chose a silk band instead of actual rope.

All Bob could do now was to sit back on his tights helplessly, waiting in anticipation. John placed the rosary around Bob's neck.

"Look at you Bobby, I could watch you like this forever. Maybe that's what I should do, leave you like this just watching you from a far."

"John please I am sorry, please."

"What are you sorry for? Robert?"

"For, for…"

"You don’t know, right?"

Bob feels how John slowly drags his index finger over his spine then screams out in pleasurable pain. There is no way that those were regular fingernails. The cut was so deep that it made a drop of blood bleed out of Bob's flesh and John eagerly licked it off.

"Every bit of you tastes so good, Bobby."

Panic rushes through Bob and he instinctively pulls at the silk band. John lets his hands wander over Bob's sides in an attempt to call him down.

"Don’t worry I will not eat you. No, I will take my sweet sweet time with you and maybe I will be generous and let you stay with me after you take your last breath."

John's hand finds his way under Bob’s chin pulling him back by the front of neck making Bob look directly into John's eyes.

"Don’t worry your pretty head about that. It will still take a long time till we reach that point."

Bob's head bounces forward. John places one final kiss on Bob's shoulder before he rips his boxers off completely.

John stands again, next to the bed. He could take the clothes off with a flick of his thump instead he takes his sweet time. The shirt opens slowly bottom by bottom, he doesn't takes it off. His finger fiddle with the band of his pants, he drags them down and steps out of them. He didn't even bother to put some underwear on.

"John please, touch me."

"Yeah I guess that's what you want."

John positioned himself under Bob, between his already trembling thighs. John loosened the silk band a little, now Bob was brushing his cock. The friction made Bob whimper already, biting down hard at his own lip to prevent the pathetic moans from leaving his mouth.

And John? John has his arm folded behind his back, his own tights comfortably spread, a wolfish grin on his face, as always.

"You said you were sorry. Show me how sorry you are. I know you can do it."

John cups Bob's face with force and places a comparatively soft kiss on the tip of his nose. Then goes back into his comfortable position.

"Take as much time as you need. We have the whole night."

But Bob was an impatient man. He didn't care about the pain anymore. He goes straight to work, circling John's cock with his entrance, pushing down in short but fast movements.

John was entertained for sure by the time Bob sank down fully on John's length, John had to laugh.

"Always so eager."

"John please, touch me."

"Oh no, not after you've been acting like a brat earlier, thinking I would not take proper care of you. You know that really hurt my feelings."

At first Bob wanted to accuse John of lying but then he saw something in his eyes, something that told Bob that John said the truth.

With a few pats to his cheek John brings Bob back into the here and now and Bob starts to roll his hips slow at first but again Bob has never been a patient man.

After a few minutes he was moving up and down at a speed that surprised John. Spilling out small pleas with every move.

"John, I am sorry. I am sorry."

"Again Bobby, for what?"

"For not listening, I am sorry for not listening to you, for not trusting you."

To Bob's luck he found the words John wanted to hear. Pleased, John sits up, his cock going deeper than before, the sudden movement makes Bob jump.

"I knew you had it in you, now let me take care of you, you did so well Bob."

At the praise Bob's eyes roll back into his head. He keeps them closed but John is not having it, the pats were harsh this time.

"No, you will keep your eyes open this time. I want to see you fall apart, that every part of you fully belongs to me."

"I already belong to you John, since you first put your hands on me." There were no moans, no sobs, just pure certainty and that made John blush for the first time.

"If I wasn't already dead I am sure you would kill me."

John grips hard on Bob’s hips and starts trusting up into him. John really tries to go slow this time, to be gentle until Bob's voice pulls him out of it.

"John, I don't need soft, I need you."

The sounds that followed after were downright unholy. Skin clapping on skin, breathy kisses, low screams, high sobs.

"I can feel that you're close Bob." John gives Bob's ass a little squeeze.

"Please, don’t stop John."

"Never."

John strokes Bob's hair back out of his face holding his face with both hands, their tongues collide. With a gut wrenching groan Bob's cum spurts over John's belly and chest while John covers Bob's hole in thick white ropes, the animalic growl sending aftershocks through Bob.

Before Bob can calm down John frees him from the band, Bob goes limp immediately collapsing on top of John.

John gives time to recover and at some point Bob opens his eyes, the stickiness reminds him of where and who he was. When he looks up and is met with John's sex drunk eyes the redness makes it's way back to his cheeks.

"Your okay? What to clean up?"

Bob tightens his grip on John giving him a sigh of disapproval but John doesn't care. He lifts Bob off the bed as if he weighs nothing and carries him all the way into the shower.

"You're not joining me?"

John hesitates but then steps under the properly warm water. Bob collected every bit of strength he had left and faced John.

"Did you actually meant that?"

"Every word. You will never get rid of me." John carefully cleans Bob with the help of the shampoo, then dries him with the towel and carries him back into bed.

Bob doesn't have to say anything. John lays down next to him pulling Bob to his side who then places his head on John's broad chest.

Maybe this all wasn't so bad was the last thought Bob could form before he drifted into the sweet abyss of sleep.

Thank you for reading all the way through ❤️. You want to read more?

Sentryagent Vampire AU: Porn with little plot

Sentryagent Late Night Calls: Mostly Fluff

From the group only three of them come inside, the tallest hooked under the arms of the other two. 

Bob doesn't let them talk; he already knows everything; he just reaches his arm out. 

"ID."

It's definitely not fake but god how can people born that year already get a tattoo. 

"Room two. You guys can get him in three hours." 

While they drag the blond boy to the room Bob makes a copy of the ID and waves the other two off. 

It’s the same way as always. Now John, that's what his ID said, sits on the tattoo chair regretting every decision he made that brought him here. 

Bob sits down on his well- used swivel stool rolling closer towards John. 

"Okay so I'm Bob and you have exactly two options. I give you a permanent tattoo that can only be removed by a way more painful laser procedure. Or I give you a temporary tattoo and you hope that your friends get drunk enough that they don't see the difference and forget about it in the next couple of days."

John nods along while Bob stops talking, not paying real attention to his words. 

"How much alcohol did you had today kid?"

That brought John back to the here and now. 

"N-None why?" 

"It's against the law to perform on someone who is not in complete control of his senses."

Again he seems to just mindlessly nod along Bob's words. 

"You know what, that is too stupid for me you should leave." 

Great, now John seems to listen, he is halfway out of the chair in an attempt to stop Bob from leaving.

"No, sorry. I promise I didn't drink anything today, I have a game on Friday."

Bob then blames it on the nervousness. 

"Here, sign this then." John sighs without hesitation even though Bob can see that his hand is shaking. 

"Maybe one drink would have done you good. I guess the temporary tattoo is off the table then?" 

"I told them I’m getting a real one."

"And what do you want?" John bits his lip at the question shrugging in place. 

Bob gets a book with his artwork and hastily turns the pages. 

"You said you have a game tomorrow? What are you playing?" Bob looks up from his book and snaps his fingers. 

"John, what are you playing?" 

"Hockey. I play hockey, ice hockey." 

"Good, what about this?" He turns the book around and John is impressed by the artwork itself and because it is a really good fit.

"And where do you want it?"

"Rib. I said I would get it on my left rib." Lie, he told them the tattoo would go on his upper arm.

"Yeah I would not recommend that for a first tattoo really. Let’s rather go with your upper arm or the outside of your thigh-"

"Thigh is for next time." You could hear a needle drop, the silence defeating.

"Okay, you're old enough. If you want rib we go for rib." 

Bob starts to gather everything he needs and has a hard time not to drop anything. 

When he comes back John sits there the way he left him. 

"You need to take your shirt off." 

Bob tries not to look too disrespectfully but damn, that's an athletic body straight from the books. Abs, bulging biceps, a small bundle of hair on his chest. 

He maneuvers the chair to the right height, into the right angle and starts the tattoo gun. 

"You know there will be a point of no return right?"

"I don't think that I will ever want that." Bob takes a deep breath and prepares for a hiss, maybe even a little scream but there comes nothing. 

Only the buzz of the tattoo gun and their breaths. The silence gives Bob too much room to think. John's skin is actually really smooth, the cologne he wears tickles a little in Bob's nose. 

Bob stops and leans back, trying to get a grip. 

"Is everything alright?" 

"Yeah sorry, just give me a second." Bob leaves the room and comes back and now it's John's turn to get slightly freaked out.  

"Why didn't you wear them from the beginning?" 

"Don’t worry, they are more preventional than anything else." John presses his lips together when Bob goes back to work. 

"Are you really that old that you need glasses already?" 

"You know that some people need them their entire lives right?"

Of course John knows, it was just a try to find out Bob’s age and maybe his brain is not getting enough oxygen anymore.

"If you call me old I kick you out without finishing." 

So he is old enough to get sensitive about his age before John can poke any further Bob answers the burning question himself. 

"38 if you want to know." That somehow doesn't make it easy for John to sort his thoughts. Especially not when Bob leans all the way forward and John can see some grey strains inbetween his brown locks. 

"So Georgia, hm?" 

"Yeah. It's actually my first time. My first time here in Florida."

"And is it nice? In Georgia?" 

"I mean we have long summers, mild winters, a six flags, can’t compete with Florida I guess. Our hockey teams are better, though."

"Sure and the game in two days?" 

"Oh it’s nothing too special." 

"And let me guess you're in your senior year?" 

"Graduation actually, I skipped a year." 

"Wow, so an athlete with brains that's quite rare. The girls must stand in line to get their hands on you." 

"They kind of do but right now I don’t care."

At the last sentence Bob presses the needle a little too hard. 

"Ow." 

"Sorry sorry let me just." Bob puts the tattoo gun down and gets rid of his lumberjack shirt leaving him only in his white tank top. At the sight John presses his head more into the chair, his finger nails dig into the leather of the chair. 

"Need a break?" No, a break was the last thing John needed now so he just shakes his head from left to right and Bob goes on with his work. 

"We're already halfway through. You're doing pretty well kid."  The unexpected praise rings between John's ears and stays there way too long. In an attempt to distract himself John keeps talking. 

"How come you're a tattoo artist without tattoos. Isn't that mandatory or something?"

"No it's not. And I have tattoo’s you just can’t see them right now."

John's smug smile drops and new thoughts spread in his head like wildfire. 

"Sure you don't need a break kid?"

"Stop calling me kid, I'm 22."

"You think that makes you an adult?" 

Again John has nothing to offer in response. He winces just the tiniest bit since the needle works over his skin for the last one and a half hours. 

"So, what was the bet?"

"Huh? Oh, some of my teammates said I couldn't block 50 pucks in a minute. I told them I could do 70. They then decided to all match with me at the same time instead of one after the other."

Bob looks up right into John's eyes. 

"That sounds pretty dangerous actually." 

The scolding in Bob’s voice was one thing; the fact John could now look directly into Bob's eyes was something else. Now he could see how perfect the glasses frame his face and also the crows feet in the corner of his eyes. The fact that he rests his arms on his hips doesn't help either.

"I know but I wouldn't be here if I didn't say yes." 

That is also true. Now everything that could have been said has been said and the silence takes over again. Not for long, Bob is nearly finished at the realization he slows his movements, maybe he wants to drag this on just a little longer. 

But eventually there are no more lines, no mending. He cleans the now red skin and adds the foil. 

"Try to keep it dry and clean. Apply this twice a day till it's empty."

John inspects the bottle while Bob leaves the room. 

"Seems like your friends are still busy elsewhere." 

"Well you told them three hours you only needed two and a half so we have thirty minutes to spare." 

"What do you mean we?-" The push is hard, John’s lips are soft and Bob's brain is mush. 

"No no no no, tell me you lied earlier. Tell me you're drunk and just really good at covering it." 

"Did you taste any alcohol?" Bob shakes his head. He didn't taste the tiniest bit of alcohol Bob would have known from his experience alone. John comes closer again and Bob takes a step back. His back smacking against one of the supply cupboards. 

"No stop. We can’t do this." 

"What? Scared you can't catch up, old man?"

All rational thoughts leave Bob's head at once. Now it's John getting shoved around back into the chair he spent the two and a half hours in. 

Bob is now straddling John's lap whose hands are roaming up, down and then back up again tugging on the tank top. 

"No, not now, not here." 

"Okay, sorry." 

"Don't be." 

The kisses get sloppier with every passing minute. More and more sweat is forming on their foreheads.

Bob moves his hips a little too frantic and suddenly a deep moan escapes John's mouth. Bob decides that his fingers are the best means to prevent that from happening again. 

"Shut it or do you wanna get us caught kid?" 

John moans again but thanks to Bob's fingers it is quieter this time. 

"Oh of course you like that. You're sick."

"Says the man who is pushing 40 sitting on top of a 22 year old." 

"Shut it." 

Bob's fingers end up back in John's mouth. Bob's hips start thrusting again, John's hands with a firm grip on them. The chair gives in to their movements, wriggling in it's place. 

The air around them becomes thick smelling of mixed colognes and salt. Without Bob noticing John lifts his legs up just enough to create more friction. 

When Bob notices fully he wants to stop but John doesn't let him. His hands move Bob's hips on and on, one hand slipping to his ass.

"John let go or I’m going to-"

"What? you going to what?"  

"Fuck." It's already too late Bob nearly chokes on his own spit holding onto John's shoulder for dear life. 

"Oh my god did you just come in your pants? Pervert." John's voice is as playful as ever but Bob catches it the wrong way feeling the urge to flee this hell of a situation. 

Then it all goes so fast. They both hear John's friends coming through the front door yelling through out the whole studio. 

"Yo Johnny, we're back!" 

"Hey! Keep your voice down dumbass." Yelena reprimands them. Bob tosses John his shirt who then walks out. Showing off his new tattoo. They howl in approval, not paying attention to the deep red blush on his face and how a little bit of drool already dried on his chin. John swipes his card with trembling fingers and with that he is gone. 

Bob stands in the doorframe of room number two processing what just happened, what he did, what they did. In one hand the shirt he took off early covering his lower half.

"God Bob, is everything alright? You look a little flustered?" 

"Yeah I think I'll take the rest of the day off." 

"Damn with that tip you can take the rest of the week off."

Back in his apartment Bob spirals into deep denial. What the hell was he thinking? He is not even sure what he is regretting the fucking make out session or that he didnt gave him his number. 

The question answers itself. When Bob throws his pants over the chair a small piece of paper slips to the ground.

Three hours later Robert Reynolds makes a choice. 

Hey

Oh thank god you found it. Sry that I left that way…

Everything's fine

  I just wanted to wish you luck

For your game

Oh yeah you better should 

?

If we win, next game is in Coral Springs

Bob threw his phone on the couch and avoided it like the plague for the next two days straight.

We won 

Congrats

Friday

Bob has dropped his location

When Bob opens the door he is greeted by a cold draft and a seemingly grumpy John.

"Hey how was the g-"

John doesn't look around, just straight ahead eyes fixated on Bob. The kiss is all tongue and teeth. Bob leaves the ground and is getting sat on the kitchen table. 

In need of air caused by the sudden intrusion Bob pushes John's head down who takes it as an invitation to assault Bob's neck. 

"That bad huh?"

"We lost. Three to One." 

"Ouch." 

"I feel kinda bad. Let my team down. Couldn't concentrate."

"I wonder why." 

Bob throws his head back as John kisses down further his collarbone and starts to unbottom his shirt. 

"I want to see them, all of them." 

It takes Bob a second to understand what John means then it dawns him. John's hands fly to Bob's belt who then comes back to his senses. 

"John, we can’t do that." 

Bob nearly chokes on his own spit at the view. John's the puppy eyes tearing at his heart. 

"God stop looking at me like that." 

John begins to tug on the belt buckle. 

"I messed up so big today. Let me do this one thing right." 

Bob just gives in and lets him do as he wants. What else is he supposed to do? His own hands get rid of John's shirt; he will never tire of this sight. A short inspecting brush over the freshly healed ink. 

When John pulls down Bob's pants a loud chuckle escapes John's mouth. 

"Cut it. I was high when I got that." 

"I think it’s funny. Lucky me indeed." 

The pants fall down to the floor revealing Bob's legs and John is completely amazed. His hand slowly wanders up and down Bob's tight who squirms in his spot at the gentle touch. 

"They are beautiful." 

"You never did something like this before, right kid?"

John shakes his head from left to right, careful Bob tucks a strain of John's blond hair behind his ear. 

"I’m definitely going to hell for this. When you were born I was already allowed to drive." 

John takes his chance before Bob can spiral too far and tells him again to stop. On instinct Bob's legs wrap around John's waist as he carries him to what John figured out is the bedroom. 

Bob now sits on the bed while John attempts to get rid of his own pants. Bob swats John's shaking fingers away. 

"Let me do that for you big boy." 

Poor John can’t even fully register what's happening, he stands now completely naked with Bob's tongue around his cock. 

"Fuck. Oh my god. That is-"

He stops talking entirely, only lewd sound slipping through his lips. At some point John remembers that this is not the reason why he came here. 

He grabs Bob's chin, forcing him to stop and look at him.

"Lie down." Bob is actually relieved, his jaw started to hurt ten minutes ago. 

With Bob's briefs gone too there is nothing left between them and they both relish it as if it is their last time. 

Bob hands John a bottle of lube and without hesitation John goes straight to work. 

Halfway through Bob questions if John lied to him about this being his first time with a man. 

"John it's enough really you can-" 

"Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you."

"If you don’t do it now I will go on top and put it in myself."

John swallows hard and then moves rolls his hips forward. The way Bob's brows are frowning, how his lips part sets him on fire, his nails digging into Bob's flesh. 

When John bottoms out his body is itching, begging him to do something but for Bob's comfort he waits and then slowly moves his hips not fully realizing that Bob grows impatient under him. 

"John, I’m saying this only once. You don’t have to hold back."

"Do you know that I’m scared of literally breaking some of your bones? A regular workout would do you good old man." 

"Good thing that this is my preferred type of workout then."

Maybe Bob shouldn't have said that. Next second he is on all fours, Johns hold on his waist strong enough to bruise. 

And maybe after the first five minutes Bob in fact really regretted what he said. His wrist sting, his tights burn, his lungs are short before collapsing but he doesn't want to say anything because despite the pain, it feels so fucking good. 

John on the other hand can not be fooled. He can see that Bob's muscles are shaking, he can hear that he has trouble breathing so John stops. 

"What- what are you doing?" 

John reaches forward, getting his hands on the biggest pillow, placing it right beneath Bob's chest. 

"Head on the pillow arms to the side." The gesture is tender, too tender to Bob's liking. He can’t remember the last time someone cared about him that way, that he is actually comfortable. 

John’s frantic thrusting turns into smooth gliding; the intensity not letting up. Save to say Bob was in heaven, mouth agape, drool smearing into the bedsheets back arched in the most comfortable way possible and still there lingered the afterthought. 

If Bob had only known what was going on in John’s mind he wouldn't have the grief allowed to creep into his head to begin with.

Before the anxiety can get too far into his head Bob feels a pressure on his head coming from John's hand. 

"Can I go a little faster again? I promise I will be quick." 

Bob just nods unable to speak, his head now getting pressed into the mattress, the air pounded out of his lunges. He feels John's body heat coming closer to him until his mouth is only inches away from his ear. 

At least John seems to be out of breath too now. 

"Can I- Can I, please." 

Bob tries to answer with a yes but it gets stuck in his throat so he just shakes his head. The enthusiasm spurts John even more on if that is even possible. 

John was right he didn't need long but he drags his high out as if he fucking owns this place. Eventually John's body craves in, careful and almost painfully slow he pulls out, collapsing onto his side

He doesn't get a chance to pull Bob with him, he already made his way to the bathroom. 

While John waits he realizes something.  Confronting Bob when he comes back from the shower.

"You didn't come." Bob just stares at John, his hair damp and wet, only a towel wrapped around his waist.

Now it was Bob's turn to lie. "Well we are even now, remember back at the studio?" The actual reason was that Bob thought that maybe if doesn't allow himself too much pleasure the guilt wouldn't eat him alive. Maybe he could label all of this as helping out. 

Good intention, too bad that John doesn't care. Poor Bob, within seconds John is up, tossing away the towel, throwing Bob back into the bed. John holds Bob down by the hip, not at chance to escape. 

"John, stop. You don't have to do that. It's really not your f- fuck." 

The good intentions are gone the second John's mouth is on Bob's cock. 

Bob's finger instinctively bury themself in John's hair for stability. 

For the first few seconds Bob really tries to push John away but the actions are short lived and he dives somewhere sweet and light. 

Ten minutes was everything Bob could offer before his grip in John's hair intensified and his muscle tense to a borderline unhealthy extent. 

"You should stop John because I fucking can’t." But he doesn't and with a final incredibly deep push Bob spends himself in John's throat. 

The tension leaves Bob's body and a heavy tiredness takes its place. He didn't want to but his eyes were already pressed together. His body felt so light that it took him only a couple of breaths to drift into sleep. And John? He finds this more amusing than anything else.

The next morning Bob, still with his eyes closed, reaches over to his bedside table in an attempt to grab his phone and is instead met with skin and laughter. 

"Morning sunshine." Bob coils in his spot and lets out a deep growl. 

"John, why are you still here?"

"Would be pretty rude to just leave right?" Before Bob can protest John pulls him into his arms and Bob lets him. Bob tries to memorize everything. John's smell, the shining in his glacier blue eyes, his hands. 

Eventually all good things have to come to an end. John gathers his clothes while picking up his jacket a loud thud jump scares Bob. 

"I didn't come unprepared, I just forgot." Now the both of them are laughing like they knew each other a lifetime already. 

Then it strikes ten. John and his friends leave at twelve. The last bit is always awkward, standing around doing nothing. Bob thinks about an appropriate way to say goodbye, John takes the decision away from him. 

Pulling him close, kissing him with the same passion as yesterday and through the night. It's Bob who tears them apart. 

"You need to leave now or they will ask questions." 

"I just tell them I hooked up with a god damn super model last night and they will leave me alone." 

"Thats not funny." 

"It's not supposed to."

John comes closer again but Bob flinches away. 

"I mean it. You have to leave and I have to get ready for work."

"Okay okay." John raises his hands in a defensive posture, heads to the door and everything inside Bob screams at him to stop him, to stop John from leaving but he is not moving an inch. 

"See you around." A wink, the door falls shut and he is gone, again.

Bob falls down on the couch dissociating till he has to go to work, still trying to figure out what he is regretting the most.  

Meanwhile John makes his way back to his hotel, phone in hand, his search history is filled up with potential Hockey Teams in and around Florida. Smiling from ear to ear as if he just won the Olympics, probably the only man on this earth able to pull off a walk of pride instead of a walk of shame. 

First is the buzzing of the shaver then of the tattoo gun. Bob throws John one last look, a chance to back out but John just nods giving his final go.

For the first half none of them say a word Bob too caught up in his thoughts John too caught up in Bob. 

"I’m staying here, in Miami for a few days." 

"Okay."

"I thought you could show me around a little, ow."

"No John I can't, I have to work." 

"But didn't he just say he sees you back on monday?" 

"I’m busy." 

"With what? Wallowing in your own self-pity? Ow, stop doing that!" 

"You're the one annoying my ass while giving you a tattoo." 

"Sorry."

Bob rolls his eyes and goes quite again. John fidgets with his fingers not knowing what to do so he keeps his mouth shut for the rest of the session. 

After Bob adds the foil he retreats from John's body as if he is something dangerous, helpless John stands up trying to close the distance. 

"Don’t even think about it kid." 

John freezes in his spot, not daring to move a muscle. 

"Listen, I’m sorry that I didn’t-" 

"Don’t do that. I don't give a shit, I didn't expect anything from you really but why do you have to show up here now, when it finally started to become… easier." 

"That that wasn’t my intention really. I was pretty busy the last couple months, graduating, team auditions, mov-."

"Shut it. I don’t want to hear it."

"Bob please I-"

"I said shut it!" Bob pushes John back into the chair with a pressure John wouldn't believe Bob was capable of if he wasn't witnessing right now. His lips pressing on Johns who need a second to process what is happening. When he does, his mouth opens, giving Bob the access he demands. 

Bob tugs at John's shirt who then tosses it over his head without giving it a second thought. Bob’s mouth wanders down, bruising and biting John's chest and tummy and John? He doesn't mind; he takes it all in, relishes in it as if it was his last day on earth. 

Next John hears a belt open, fabric falling to the ground. He doesn't know how Bob manages it but now he slowly but steadily lowers himself on John’s painfully hard cock. 

When he reaches the bottom Bob moves his hand to his glasses, John grabs his hand in a rush of something close to panic. 

"Please keep them on?" 

Bob rolls his eyes, next his hips. John's hands fly to Bob's waist as if it is second nature but Bob pins them down onto the chair. 

"Don’t fucking touch me." 

John says nothing and lets Bob do whatever he wants. His hands keep pinning John's wrists down then they move until his nails bury themself in the flesh of John's chest.

Instead of just rolling his hips Bob now moves up and down on John who can not do anything else than just take it and admire the beautiful view yet it still burns in John's heart that he is not allowed to touch him. Not allowed to stroke his sweaty curls out of his face, not allowed to steady his hips, not allowed to hold him at all.

John watches and observes Bob in his doing, catching the cues that he is close. His nose is scrunching, his forehead frowning and his breath rigged. 

The desire becomes unbearable for the both of them. John digs his nails into the leather leaving new scratches next to the once from the last time. 

Bob puts his whole weight into his arms, on John's torso, biting down on his own lip so hard he tastes blood, his cum painting all over John's stomach. 

John swallows his own moans while coming deep inside Bob. 

It’s too sudden, too early, Bob stands up hissing in a mix of pain and the fading pleasure while John has to suppress a sob at the loss of Bob's warm body on top of him. 

Bob puts his pants back on loosely, knowing fully well that he can not go home like this then he throws John a clean towel. 

"Five minutes, then you're gone kid." 

Startled would describe John Walker best now. One of the five minutes he needs to gather is thoughts not really sure what to do but for now he will withdraw, giving Bob time and space. 

Bob stands at the backdoor holding onto his cigarette as if it could save him. Then he hears the front door open and close. 

This was Bob's poor attempt to gain back the narrative. An attempt to gain something similar to control and the feeling lasts until the cigarette is burned down to its filter. 

It then hits Bob fully what he just did. It's not even about the age at this point. Bob comes to terms with the fact that he always was and will always be nothing more than an asshole.

For the following 24 hours he locks himself in his apartment. The haze of more cigarettes and his bong filling the cracks in the walls. 

His phone buzzes from time to time, maybe it's John, maybe not, he is not checking. He will not reach out, not give in again, John deserves better than this, better than him. If Bob only knew that his honorable intentions will be short lived. 

He is spread out on the couch just straight up staring at the ceiling when the ring of the doorbell nearly scares him to death. 

"Drop it at the door." Must be the mailman, Bob's neighbors order a shit ton and when they are at work Bob takes them in for them. The doorbell rings again followed by a hastily knock. 

"I said fucking drop- god damn it." Bob manages to move up from the couch, opening the door just a crack wide. 

"I said-" Bob wants to shut the door close again but a foot is stopping him from doing so. 

"Wait, please let me come in, I just want to talk." Bob growls not in a mood for a confrontation but eventually lets John in. 

John noticed immediately, the smell, Bob’s posture, the glassy eyes but he doesn't say a word about it instead he moves his arm from behind revealing what he is hiding. 

"I came to apologize." Now Bob's eyes shoot wide, his head tilts to the side not quite believing the words he just heard. 

"John that, you didn't have to…. I don’t even have a vase." 

"Then you should better invest in one."

John steps closer and Bob takes the bouquet with shaking hands.  

"I mean it, I've been an asshole. I should have texted you. I was so stressed and I didn't want you to think that I was only texting you because I feel obliged to." 

"You are Impossible, you know that? John you are not the asshole here I am-" 

"No it's okay I get it you know." 

"No you don’t. I shouldn't have sent you away like that. Gods, I shouldn't have touched you again. I don't even know why I did that." 

That is not the whole truth, Bob just couldn't resist, how could anyone who views John closely. And of course John is entirely aware of the effect he has and is not afraid to use that to his advantage. 

Now straightening his back, letting his hand glide through his hair, smiling just enough, giving his best charming demeanor.

"If you really feel that bad, I know a way you could apologize properly."

-------------

Down this street at the end when you make a sharp right turn there is a regular mall. When you drive a couple of miles in this direction you find one of those high class malls with brands plastered all over. Every now and then you can even spot a celebrity there. 

The strong sarcasm in Bob's tone makes John laugh while he is just nodding along, listening as Bob shows him around. They decided to walk so John could remember better afterwards.  

Bob shows John his local grocery store, they make a stop at the bookshop Bob should visit more frequently. 

They walk under the hot Floridian sun for hours, ending up strolling down the piers at the beach catching a refreshing breeze. After the sun sets behind the shore, John dares to ask a question. 

"And where do you go to have fun?"

Bob doesn't know if this is embarrassing or amusing. He passed the bouncer with a polite smile, now John still stood in front of this bull of a man fidgeting with his wallet. 

When he finally catches up with Bob his head is as red as a tomato. 

"He thought the ID was fake and wanted to send me away only let me pass because I told him I'am here with you." Maybe it's the fact that they have been in the sun all day but Bob genuinely has to laugh and John decides there and then that this will be his new favorite melody. 

Inside people are dancing, drinking, chatting, kissing, at the bar the music is quiet enough to talk. 

John grabs one of the small menus and hands it over to Bob. 

"Recomend me something." 

Bob has to blink a lot and hold the menu a little far away and then closer again, the writing is quite small. 

"Preventional my ass, give it back." Before John can snap the menu out of Bob's hands, Bob prevents him from doing so with just the force of his index finger softly pressed against the tip of John's nose. 

"Only over my dead body."

Bob orders and when the drinks arrive John is in utter confusion. In front of him stands a large glass filled to the brim with yellow, orange and red juice and way too much tequila, John will soon find out. And Bob? Bob only has a bottle of water. 

"Don’t look at me like that. Remember when you picked me up earlier? Weed and alcohol don’t go well together, did that once and ended up in the ER." 

Bob takes John's glass in his own hand bringing it closer to John's lips. 

"Drink, it's a Floridian special." 

John takes the straw in his mouth, the first sip lets him choke already.

"I knew it. Who in their right minds lets themself get taken into a bar without ever having tried alcohol before?" 

"I had alcohol before you know, like beer and some champagne at my graduation." 

Again Bob just laughs at John's seriousness and John lets him and listens. Halfway through he abandons the drink entirely, already feeling a little tipsy, his feet tapping to the ongoing song. 

"If you want we can dance."

"Like seriously?"

"I mean everyone here is either high, drunk or completely preoccupied with themselve's. Just give me five minutes."

When Bob comes back from the bathroom he freezes in the doorframe. John is still at the bar in his spot but now someone else is keeping him company. 

She is pretty though and definitely closer to John's age than Bob. He is doing most of the talking, she laughs a lot. This is too much, Bob turns around and goes back to the bathroom, locking himself in one of the individual stalls. 

He gets a small heart attack not feeling the little plastic phial in his pockets at first. It’s for emergencies like this. He doesn't know how long he stays there until he hears John shout his name. 

"I’m here, don't freak out." 

"Did you just- I mean isn't it unhealthy to consume that much?” 

"Trust me that wasn't much. So did you get her number?"

"What are you talking about?" 

"That girl you were talking to, she seemed nice, so did she give you her phone number?"

It becomes as silent as it can get in the bathroom of a club. Bob constantly avoiding John's gaze. 

"You're jealous?" 

"No, I'm not jealous. She is definitely a better fit for you." 

"And still you're jealous." 

Bob hesitates exactly one second too long and gets caged by John's big and heavy arms in return. Now they are both in the small bathroom stall, the proximity suffocating. John doesn't even lock the door, Bob's body weight will do the trick. 

John's hands know their target and the belt of Bob's pants is open. 

"Have you completely lost your mind? Were not having sex in a fucking club." 

"Yeah you're right."

"John- John I don't think that is a good idea. We've been sweating like crazy-oh my god." 

Bob's incredible high moan gets swallowed by the music and the buzzing noises from their surroundings. For the first few seconds Bob really tries to stop John who then just pins Bob's wrists against the door not because he wants to take revenge for what happened two days ago, of course.

With that Bob is gone, only his body stays present. Head rested back against the door.

Sure this time it tasted different but that didn't bother John in the slightest if not even the opposite it still tasted like Bob on his tongue and that was all he wanted. The music does not only swallow Bob's moans and whimpers but also John's gags.

This time he made sure to look up when Bob approaches his high and damn, the view is something else and Bob basically thinks the same when his head bows down locking eyes with John while spending himself deep down his throat.

With all the strength left Bob pulls John up for a deep and wet kiss. Bob doesn't miss the blink of hope in John's eyes. He lets his thump stroke over John's open mouth.

"You did well kid. Let's go dancing." 

They make themselves presentable, find a spot and get moving.

John is a little more hesitant at first not wanting to make a fool of himself but that changes as soon as Bob's arms close around his shoulders and his own hands anchor themselves on Bob's waist. When Bob closes his eyes to get lost in the moment, John's eyes wander around, getting stuck at a group of people sitting a little inside one of the booths. They take turns bringing their faces close to the table. 

"What are they doing?"

Bob only needs a small look to realize what John means, to him it is quite adorable how innocent his question is.

"I'll tell you when you're older."

John rolls his eyes, annoyed by the answer but lets it pass, not wanting to upset Bob who seems to have a really good time. 

At some point Bob practically screams into John's ear. 

"I go for some fresh air, wanna come with me?" 

John eagerly nods in need for a short breeze too. Behind the club it's as crowded as inside. 

"Want one?" 

"No thank you. I know what's good for me." 

"Thrust me kid, you don’t."

Bob lit his cigarette and felt it right away, the shift in the air, it smells like trouble. The back door swings open again and Bob makes the mistake to look. 

"Hey Bobby, how are you doing lately?"

John can see that Bob's posture changes immediately, that he flinches a little further away from the man when he tries to pull him into a hug. 

"Don’t come near me, Greg." 

"Oh come on can two old friends not- oh wow and who is this handsome young man over here?"

The man has the nerve to let his arm reach out in an attempt to stroke John biceps but Bob is not having it. He slaps the hand away.

"That is none of your buiness, don't fucking touch him." 

"Okay, that is a new low for you Bobby, look at him. Is he even allowed to be in here?" 

"Yes he is, now get lost and leave us alone." 

"Sure whatever you say, perv.." 

Finally there is silence until a woman starts to scream hysterically. John knuckles are now open and so is the mouth of the man blood pooling at the corners. 

John only feels that Bob takes his hand and leads him away, out of the club, onto the streets back to his apartment. Bob’s voice is only a dull noise in the back of his head. 

He comes to his senses when Bob sat him down on the couch. 

"My goodness, John are you even listening to me?" Bob is way louder than usual, not quite shouting but close. 

John is the one screaming, throat filled with anger. "What the fuck did you expected me to do?!" 

"Nothing. I expected nothing."

Involuntary John's eyes fill with water "I’m so sorry." Bob's feral behavior falters at the sight. He drops down to his knees holding John's face in his hands. 

"I didn’t mean for that to happen. You told him to leave us alone, and he didn’t listen.” Bob’s heart ached as he sobbed; he regretted every decision that had made John so miserable because of him.

"It’s okay really. It's okay. It was just Greg, he will not call the police or something."

"I don't care. He called you a fucking pervert. The look he gave you. You deserve better than that."

Gentle Bob stokes John's hair out of his face holding it back with the other he wipes away the tears. There it lingers right on Bob's lips, but he is too afraid to say it so he uses the language he is used to. 

He starts small, prepping short kisses on John's forehead, then his cheeks the taste of salt omnipresent. 

"Can I touch you? Please."

"Yes, of course." Bob expected some wandering hands, a kiss on the side of his throat but instead he was greeted with John wrapping his arms around him and burying his face in Bob's neck. 

John's body relaxes and his breath becomes more regular again. 

"Hey-hey you're not sleeping now."

John's whole body winches at Bob's slight but firm pats on his cheek. 

"We walked under the sun for hours, danced in this shady club, you blew me off in that dirty bathroom and you still have blood on your hands. You and I shower. Now."

As if someone flipped a switch inside John he is up and carries Bob to the bathroom, over his shoulder like a caveman. 

"I had a feeling that would better your mood." 

Bob checks the water temperature while John strips down then he mindlessly closes the distance between them. Bob's shirt flies to the ground and John's hands work further down so fast that Bob's objection reaches John's ears a little too late. 

"No no wait." 

"Oh my, why are you hard already?" 

Bob soakes in a deep breath, embarrassment written all over his face.

"It was irresponsible and pretty stupid to punch that guy but it was also, really really hot." 

The water is also running hot, John's body is running hot too, only the tiles give Bob a short lived cool down. 

The proximity is suffocating but he is exactly where he wants to be. 

"First you're giving me a lecture now you're telling me you got a boner from watching me punching that guy? Who was that anyway?"

"My Ex. I mean it was hot to see someone getting beaten instead of me getting a- "Now it's John's turn to soak in a deep breath waiting for Bob to finish his sentence but he backs down not wanting to ruin the moment- "You know what? You're right I’m a hypocrite, but why don’t you claim your prize, strong boy?"

Nearly all the blue in John's eyes gets taken over by the black of his pupils. Claiming gets a new definition now, after twenty minutes Bob is raw, covered in blue and purple bruises and even some bites and for the first time ever he doesn't mind. Because for the first time ever it doesn't hurt like it usually does, no every little mark feels like a love declaration to Bob and that is exactly Johns intention. 

Bob is completely locked in his headspace savoring every second of this, not caring for the pain that his actions will bring in the morning. Then John's hands grab his hips turning him around continuing the game on the back of Bob's neck and his shoulders. 

When John drags his tongue all down Bob's spine his knees go weak causing him to nearly fall to the ground. 

John steadys him with one hand on his hip and one cupping his ass, that's when John sees it. 

"That wasn't there last time, right?"

"No I got it a few days after-after you left, as a souvenir. I know it's stupid. I wasn't thinking clearly." 

John bites down on Bob's ass right where the tattoo sits, the sudden action lets Bob jump. 

"That is so hot." A firm slap echoes through the bathroom. "But, who gave you that?"

"Hm? Oh Joaquin, why?" 

"So he touched your ass?"

"What? Jealous much?" The short answer is yes, the long answer is that John spreads Bob's legs with his own. Buries one hand deep into Bob's hair and works him open with his fingers. 

When John bottoms out fully Bob doesn't see stars, he sees the whole damn galaxy.

Again Bob is surprised. He braced himself for some uncontrolled pounding but instead was met with a sensual and soft rhythm. 

John closes the distance even more, wrapping Bob in his arms, resting his head on Bob's shoulders. 

"Please don’t let him touch you again." It is a plea, not demanding, not possessive by any means just a small broken plea. 

"I promise I will not-" A deep and desperate sound Bob has never heard before escapes John's lips.  

"No one will ever touch you again, except me, I promise."

Now John loses just the tiniest bit of control and Bob doesn't mind. Embracing his second orgasm of the night while John borrows himself so deep that Bob could have sworn he feels John in his stomach. 

After the high, Bob's body goes limp to an extent that John has to steady him carefully; he cleans Bob up and lowers him on the bed. Right when John is pulling the blanket over their bodies he hears a snore so cute he has to giggle like a boy.  

The next morning Bob reaches out for his phone but this time there is no one blocking him. In a rush of panic he reaches for the pillow next to him, cold. 

He needs a couple of minutes to gather the courage to look through the rest of the apartment. Only his shoes and jacket spread around, no water running. 

John is gone. Bob sits down at the small table. It shouldn't hurt like this, his heart shouldn't feel like it's been torn to shreds and loosely glued together afterwards but that is exactly how Bob feels. 

The tears come involuntary and fall silent, disappearing into the wood. Then the door swings open and Bob twitches in his seat.

"Oh shit I thought I could make it before you're awake." 

He hangs the keys on the board and throws two large paper bags on the kitchen counter. 

"How can you live like that? I mean what do you eat? Air and weed?"

Now John turns around the sunshine he brought with him fading away. 

Bob wasn’t fast enough to wipe away his tears; it didn't matter his rosy cheeks and the running nose would have given him away anyway.

"Why are you crying?" Horror creeps onto John's face. "Oh my god you thought I left right?" 

He walks over to Bob playfully cupping his chin, the fat smooch is almost too much for Bob this earlier in the morning.

"I thought I made it very clear that you can not get rid of me?" John's gaze now lands on Bob's neck and the peek of his collarbone. The prior horror switches places with guilt and shame. 

"Sorry for those I don't know what got into me last night. I usually don't do stuff like that." 

"Don't worry you're not the only one here having some first time’s last night." John crooks an eyebrow and Bob realizes how wrong that just sounded. 

"I meant. You are the first person I let sleep here for more than one night and you’re also the first person who wanted to."

Somehow John manages to take that confession with pride. Bob smiles weakly at John whose growling stomach takes up all the attention. Bob observes everything. How John puts away the groceries and his shirt rides up just a little when he reaches for the cupboards. 

How good he looks while hovering over the stove with his back to Bob giving him a good view of his….

"Breakfast ready." The food on the plate smiles back at Bob, how cheesy. He eats slowly so John can catch up when his breakfast is ready too. Since he basically eats like a vacuum they both finished at the same time. 

Bob attempts to rise up from his chair to clean up but John pushes him back down. Bob's back becomes a paid actor with a crack audibly for both of them to hear. At first it's just John who laughs but his laughter is so contagious that Bob can't help but laugh along.

"You relax old man, I take care of it." 

"John, you're my guest. I should have cooked for you, I should-"

John just straight up mocks Bob's own words back at him at which Bob lets out a huff. 

When everything's cleaned John goes over to his jacket, pulls out an envelope and hands it over to Bob. 

 "Its the first game of the season, it would mean a lot to me if you come."

"And then what? You want to introduce me to your teammates and parents as your boyfriend?"

"Yeah no that's not happening, the second part, I mean not like that. I broke contact with them right after my 21st birthday."

Suddenly the smile Bob loves over everything is gone. 

Bob cups John's face, forcing him to look at him, his thump gently stroking over John's cheek. 

"And what did they do?" 

"You are- You are the first person to ask me that."

It was a record, John Walker crying two times within 24 hours was a record. 

"They always tried to make me something I’m not. Always expecting to obey their wishes, always expected to do everything right just like my brother."

Good thing that John broke contact, Bob doesn't like his parents already. 

"I never got to be my own person. On my 21st birthday I realized that it will never be enough, that I will never be enough. So I packed my stuff and left moved together with a friend."

"Seems like the right decision to me." 

"You know what the worst part is? My brother even had the nerve to call me, telling me that I’m making a mistake, that I’m just ungrateful…"

"Hey everything you have achieved, everything you are right now, you have built that. You can be so proud of yourself. You have the gentlest heart I ever met and still you are also the most stubborn man this world has ever seen. If your family can't love you for that, for you, then they are fools."

They don’t know how long John stays buried in Bob's arms but at some point Bob's curiosity gets the best of him. 

"John as much as I love holding you, don't you have practice today?" 

He just murmurs against Bob's chest.

"At twelve, your clock says it's ten."

Bob nods then remembers. 

"John, it is twelve, the clock is two hours past!"

Like he was struck by lightning, John gathers his stuff, correcting his looks and still takes his time to place a soft kiss on Bob's head, pouting like a child begging for a cookie before dinner. 

"Please think about it."

-------------

Again Bob feels like an asshole, this time he is sure he is one. He missed the complete first half, okay maybe it's not his fault alone. Yelena begged him to hop in for her since her father had an emergency and needed to go to the hospital and maybe the interstate was in a full after hours rush. 

When Bob enters the stadium he deeply starts to hate himself. The whole time Bob viewed John's Hockey career as a hobby he put a lot of determination in, but this? The stadium is filled to the brim. While he looks around an usher approaches him, most likely because he looks as helpless as a child in a toy store. 

Bob is getting lead away from the high and packed stands closer to the actual rink into a small but separated area the man points at the spot in the front row, of course front row.

Bob looks around again the halftime must come to an end soon. His eyes got stuck on the scoreboard, it then dawns him. He doesn't even now what team John is on. Well it can only be the the opposing team or else he would be a Panther and that would mean… 

The loud speakers shake Bob out of his thoughts.

-AND AGAIN WE ARE BACK. THE BUFFALO SABRES AGAINST THE FLORADIAN PANTHERS. THE SCORE IS CURRENTLY ONE TO ONE. WILL THE TIGHTLY KNIT TEAM OF THE SABRES WIN THIS GAME OR WILL THE NEW SHOWCASE ROOKIE JOHNATHAN WALKER BRING THE WIN HOME FOR THE PANTHERS?-

Bob doesnt pay too much attention because there he is. Eyes fixed on the spot he reserved for Bob, god he looks like a wardrobe with those shoulder pads on. 

Bob sees the side of his mouth shooting up to an almost unnatural extant, it warms Bob's heart. He then realised John is wearing a mostly black jersey, a panthers jersey. He doesn't know what to feel so for the sake of the game he focuses on just that, the game and John. 

Cheering, booing, clapping, whistles it all becomes dull in the last minutes of the game. The Panthers make one goal and so do the Sabres so two minutes before the time is up it stands two to two. 

Because of someone getting injured there is a short break everyone is skating around waiting for the game to continue and John? He is making his way over to Bob. 

"Thank you for coming!" He has to shout because of the noises and the plexiglass between them, he then blows Bob a kiss and skates off. 

Some people around Bob notice, their glances are nasty but right now Bob doesn't care. 

What he does care about is that John just made a goal, the time is up, they have won. Now Bob's equally euphoric with everyone else in the arena who is a Panthers fan of course. 

Then he waits and waits and waits but John is not coming. At some point Bob decided he waited enough, trying to make his way to the locker room and he almost succeeded without an obstacle, that is until two young men with Panther jerseys caught him right before the locker room. 

"Excuse me Sir are you lost? Can we help you?"

Bob doesn't know what to answer, he doesn't have to, John answer for him. 

"It's alright, he belongs to me." Bob gulps down hard at the confession and the two younglings let him pass. He doesn't see how they are checking him out and give John an approving thumbs up who just rolls his eyes in response. 

John pulls Bob inside the empty locker room right into his arms. Bob is greeted with the strong scent of John's shampoo and the remaining heat from the game. 

"I thought you weren't coming."

"Sorry things got in the way I really tried my best."

"You're here now, that's all that counts for me."

"When were you going to tell me?" 

"When I came into the studio, you decided to rather shut me up and then again in your apartment but you were pretty busy telling me what an asshole you are."

"And why the Panthers? No offence, really but don't you think you could have done better?"

"Of course I could have done better but the other teams weren't in Florida." 

Worry is written all over Bob's face not for himself only for John. Still not sure if John can truly imagine the consequences of their actions if they continue their story the way they desire. 

"If we really do this, whatever this is. It will be hard, the kiss you blew me, the people around me already started talking."

"Let them, I don’t care. I have nothing to lose, except my chance with you." John places his thumb under Bob's chin forcing him to look him directly in the eyes. "And if someone ever has the nerve to insult you again I will take care of it, everytime."

Too captivated by John's lips and his words Bob can't find his own so he seals the deal with a kiss more intense than everything they exchanged before.

When Bob opens his eyes again he is met with a shit eating grin taking up all of John's face. 

"I know what you're thinking kid. Let's save that for a worldcup or something, to keep morals high."

"Gods Ryan is so fucking stupid."

"So stupid, yes." It's hard to talk when your chest is getting pressed against the front door, not a lot of air ending up in your lungs.

"I don't know why he is captain, his leadership is just shit."

"Yeah- yeah no leadership skills at all." Forming words becomes an impossible task already as John gets rid of his own shirt and then Bobs. With just the right pressure to Bob liking he kisses down Bob's spine, muttering between them.

"They should make me captain."

"You would be the b- fuck" Now its Bobs back getting pressed against the cold steel, John right in front of him. Still sweaty from the game, hair loose all over his face. Not even directly looking at Bob while getting rid of their pants.

"I bet with me as captain we would already have won the fucking world cup." Bob presses his eyes closed mentally preparing himself for John's fingers gliding into his briefs.

"You would have won the god damn olympics." Well now that got John's attention finally he takes a close look at Bob. The flushed cheeks, the grey strains all of it he fell in love two years ago and his chest blooms like on the first day. John brings his hand close to Bob's face, tugging one of the strains behind Bob's ear, tilting his own head a little to the side.

"Are you sugarcoating me?"

"No?"

"Then tell me one thing I could do better."

"John, you're not really the type to take criticism well." John throws his hands up threathing to stop and its working.

"Jezz okay, your left hand is lousy."

"Lousy… Is that so?"

"When you use it you only hit the target every fourth time or so, could also come from the fact that you're always distracted by something."

"Only by you."

"If that is really the case kid, maybe I shouldn't come to your practise anymore-"

John had a strong opinion about Bob's proposal so strong that Bob was swept off of his feet and carried to their bedroom.

Next John puts Bob down onto the mattress slowly and careful, Bob just rolls his eyes.

"I‘m not fragile you know."

"Thats just part of the old man treatment, since your pushing fourty."

Bob playfully hits John's chest with his feet who then catches it and pulls Bob closer.

He starts kissing from Bob's ankle all the way to his knee and then agonizingly slow, up his thigh. With every brush of John's finger Bob arches under the touch, growing more and more impatient by the second.

"God damn it John, could you stop acting like a baby and finally do something?"

"Oh you're getting grumpy now? Maybe we should stop. I mean it is past your bedtime already."

Bob wants to push John down and straddle his lap but John can feel it before Bob is actually doing it and prevents it from happening altogether. John's hand gripping Bob's chin firm but without pressure, his left index finger coming up to his nose securing Bob's glasses for what's about to happen.

"You are staying right where you are."

A few minutes later Bob rolls his eyes first because when John is in a fit of rage he fucks like a wild animal, no retrains, no holding back just pure and intense plessure. Second, John kept talking a lot, under his breath rather murmuring to himself. And the problem is that Bob finds this amusing to an extent that he can not withhold a giggle with the last bit of air left in his lunges. John stops his movements immediately which earns him a pathetic whine from Bob.

"You think I’m a joke?"

Bob shakes his head in a no, trying to keep his last ounce of composure, lips pressed tighter.

"You think I‘m a bad player?" That's what Bob didn't want to happen, it is rare but sometimes even Johnathan Walker shows his insecurities. Now Bob has to think harder than his current position allows.

"I think once your captain, whenever that will be, that season you guys will win the god damn cup." Bob sees how the gears in John's head are turning and then finally his grip around Bob's hips tightens again.

"You really think that?" John goes back to his pace hitting way deeper than before so that the yes coming out of Bob's mouth is a pleasant scream in John's ears. For some time the only thing hearable are the moans coming out of the two men's mouths until they both choke on it.

John lowers himself right over Bob right before he comes, pushing away Bob's sweaty curls out of his face. As a response Bob digs his nails into John's shoulders.

To Bob's amazement John never fails to time his orgasm so that he follows short after him. With both of them spent, their breaths slowly start to become even again. Bob locks eyes with John and nods giving him silent permission and next John is spread over Bob like a sticky, heavy blanket.

Again Bob has to giggle while John preps small kisses at the side of his neck. As a trade Bob offers gentle strokes with the back of his hand, down John's back or rather as far as he can reach.

Later that night all cleaned up and tugged under the blanket John pulls Bob in a hug so tight Bob can hear John's heartbeat which is seemingly a little too fast.

"I'm sorry okay? I‘m sorry, I shouldn‘t-" His grip around Bob tightens some more and Bob has a hard time pushing at his chest to get enough distance to speak.

"John I‘m alright. You are alright. You just need some sleep okay? The day was long and tiring, you deserve some rest."

Bob can feel that with a deep breath all of John's muscles let loose at once and a good five minutes later hears some cute little snoring that lets Bob fall asleep too.

As pleasant as last night was, the morning has something else in storage for Bob. The shrill sound of razorblades ringing in his ear. Without looking he reaches for a random piece of clothing which is fortunately John's jersey, which fits Bob like a potato sack going all the way down to his knee caps.

In the kitchen he finds the culprit.

"I thought we agreed on not using the damn blender in the morning?"

"It is already eleven." Both their glanzes wander to the wooden clock hanging on the wall and Bob gives in, defeated.

"Here drink this, it helps with brusing." Bob wants to say no, he really does. The drink looks way too green and smells way too much like citrus for this earlier in the morning. The problem is that John always means well and Bob doesn't want to hurt his feelings since John is one of the few people in this world who cares about him.

While trying not to gag on the thick shake Bob's eyes wander back to the clock and down where the calendar is located. Two weeks from now John will be gone again and how long depends on how good they playing. The thought alone makes Bob's stomach rumble.

"The offer still stands, you can come with me."

"John, we already talked about this."

"I know its just, I miss you too and sometimes it is hard because-"

"Because everyone else on the team has someone with them?"

John nods sheepish, he doesn't want to start a fight, he just wants Bob to come with him.

"I will not become a player-wife or whatever, I love my job."

"I know and you're really good at it too."

Bob starts to shudder at the thought that if he goes with John those boulevard magazines would pick up on their relationship. To their luck or rather Bobs everyone on the team kept their mouth shut so far.

They both drop the topic without further words not wanting to disturb the time they have together.

-------------

Two weeks fly by too fast, now the last night before, they cling into each other like a lifelife. If Bob's smell was available as cologne John would buy a life ration without thinking twice while Bob would pay every price for a heated John-shaped pillow.

"You're already at the game huh?"

"Yeah sorry, It feels like my head is going to explode any second."

"Don‘t be sorry, let me do something to clear your mind a little." John stops Bob's hand before it can move.

"Lets just stay like this okay?" Instead of down, his hand moves up now caressing John's face.

"You will do great this season. Even if you don't win you have so many good years ahead of you." John simply closes his eyes, giving into Bob's touch completely. They don't sleep that night they never do. John sleeps in the bus or plane and Bob well, there is a reason why Yelena avoids being on the same shift with him for the following three days after John's departure.

After the first week it gets bearable most of the time.

Of course Bob wants John to succeed but there is this tiny little voice in the back of his head that sighs every time John calls to tell him they won another game. 

It is usual for Bob to drown himself in work to distract him but right now the studio is empty. Everything's cleaned twice so he and Jaquine are sparing some time browsing through magazines. He gets his hands on the newest edition of “People” and normally he mindlessly browses through it and if he finds an article about John he simply laughs it off. This time he doesn't have to flip a single page, John is all over the cover right next to him some attractive young man doesn’t know. 

He stared too long so Joaquin pulled the magazine right out of Bob's hand. 

"Newcomer hockey superstar Johnathan Walker speaks freely about his sexuality, young golf major winner Darly Mellow agrees." 

"I think everyone should be able to live out their sexuality without being judged. I mean it's none of your business who loves who when all you have to say is some bullshit." States Johnathan Walker. 

"Everything he just said is right. If you don't have anything nice to say, shut your mouth." Darly Mellow agrees. 

Bob lets the words sink into his ears and into his stomach. Everyone would think that John was probably drunk while saying this but Bob knows better. John never drinks, he meant every word he said. That does not change a thing. Unconsciously Bob's jaw starts to clench and a burning spreads through his whole body. 

"Calm down, you don't think he cheated on you right? I mean it's John. He can‘t even eat the last cookie without asking you first."

Now that Joaquin said it out loud it sounded even more stupid. He is right in contrast to every other man Bob was with before he doubts that John even knows what cheating is. It's the cover that drives Bob crazy, Johns not doing anything except giving the photographer a polite smile. This Mellow guy on the other hand…his eyes are so focused on John's mouth, hands slightly placed around his hip. It is utterly stupid, John has been in those types of papers a lot but most of the time with women, he is bi, why does it bother him so much now?

The ring of a phone pulls Bob back to the here and now. 

"Bet you 10 bucks, that's John." 

Bob pull put his phone and of course Jaquine is right. 

"Whatever you do please don’t read-"

The pressed deep sign that escapes Bob's lips says it all. 

"You already did, right?"

"John it’s-" 

"Shit baby I’m sorry. That dude was nice but there wasn't anything- I shouldn't have said that to the reporter I’know you don’t like it when-" 

While Johns brabbling out his apologies Bob takes a deep breath pinching the bridge of his nose. 

"John!"

Now it's not just John freezing in his spot, Joaquin does too. When Robert Reynolds raises his voice it is serious.

"Everything is fine. I know you just said whatever came into your head first, that's one of the many reasons I love you.“ 

Joaquin throws Bob an approving thumbs up. 

„I will make it up to you, I promise. You have a wish free. What do you want? That new tattoo gun, some new pencils?“

"A massage." 

"That's it?"

"Yes, just a good and long massage." Since John always gets threatened by the best physiotherapists in town he knows how to hit all the right spots and his strong hands provide just the right pressure. Bob's shoulders fall down by the thought of it.

"You want a happy ending too?" Now Joaquin is giving his best impression of someone throwing up while John laughs at the other side of the call.

"Okay it's two massage now."

"Don‘t worry you won‘t have to wait long. I think we're coming back next week."

"What? Why?"

"Even if we win against Toronto we don't stand a chance against Dallas. Their defense is too strong this year and Ryan encourages some of us to ignore the coaches orders."

"Shit that sucks… I know you will give it your best though."

"Anyway it is a win win for me. Either we win the game or I see you again sooner. I can't lose." Now Bob smiling to himself like an idiot too caught up in what John said that he forgets to say anything in response. 

"I have to hang up. Hear ya later. love you bye!" With that the line is dead. 

"It's good to see that all those years of therapy are working." 

"What do you mean by that?" 

"I‘m just saying that a few years ago you would have probably been at the ceiling at this point. Spiraling and isolating yourself. I hope you're proud of you because I am."

"Thanks, it's still hard, you know. This guy, they look good together. That's what John deserves someone who-"

"We're stopping right here. You two deserve each other, everyone can see that you should too." 

Again Bob doesn't know what to say so he only offers a small smile. 

"Lets close for today. You look like you need some rest."

Within minutes after stepping foot into his and John's apartment he falls onto the couch and is gone. 

-------------

Of course John was right. They only one with one point against Toronto but lost to Dallas in a landslide. Now Bobs at the airport stop impatiently waiting for John and so are the other spouses from the rest of the team. Within the last months most of them got married and started their family planning. Some are pregnant, some already have strollers with them. A sharp and painful reminder that this aspect of life will be unreachable for John if they stay together. 

All of that is forgotten for the moment when John finally arrives. Dark circles under his eyes, hair ruffled. Just the way Bob likes it. After the longest shower John has ever taken and eating the chinese take out like a vacuum they end up in bed. Limbs tangled, John's grip around Bob as tight as ever. It's normal that John sleeps for three to four days in a row with only eating and using the bathroom interrupting. This is usually the only time when Bobs are allowed to cook, always bringing the food to the bed. 

After that everything goes back to normal. When Bob's not at work he goes to John's practice, when John's not at practice he works around the apartment or goes out to buy groceries. On rare occasions he visits Bob at the studio such as today. 

To his delight a blonde woman is behind the counter and starts running in his direction the second he steps through the door. 

"Johnny it's so good to see you." Despite her short appearance her strong hugs take John by surprise every time. 

"Hey Lena, it's good to see you." 

"God, you're smiling like an idiot, did something happen?" 

"I tell you later, we need to talk about something else. Did you ask Joaquin?"

Yelena makes her way back behind the counter and John makes himself comfortable on one of the high chairs. 

"Well it took a little convincing but he thinks you're good for Bob so he says it's fine."

"Great and have you already ordered the stuff?" At the last word John wriggles his eyebrows which genuinely makes Yelena laugh. 

"Everything‘s at my apartment. When are you going to ask him?" 

"On his birthday." The face palm was louder than Yelena intended. 

"Are you really sure about that? I mean don't you think it will be a little too much?"

"Its not like I‘m going to ask him in front of everyone. We will all have some fun together and when the timing is right I will ask him." Another aspect Bob fell so deeply in love with, John always expects things to turn out just fine never a worry never an pessimistic second thought. 

"So what do you want to ask me?" Johns and Yelena's gaze shoots to Bob who stands in the frame of room number 2. arms crossed, waiting for an answer. Johns not blushing at this point, he is crimson red from the tip of his ears down to his neck, a clear sign that he is hiding something. 

"We- I uhm. I wanted to ask for another tattoo. Yes, a tattoo on my chest. Yes, definitely on my chest." Bob's gaze intensifies and John throws a subtle glance in Yelena's direction.

"Yes he came in asking for a new tattoo. I tried to talk him out of it but you know he's as stubborn as a mule." John nods along and they both smile as innocently as possible. 

"Well, let me bill the last customer, I‘m free for a few hours." John watches Bob in his doing getting lost in the beautiful grey strains John forbade to ever be diyed over and those shiny ocean eyes and-

"John, room two."

Snapping back into the here and now John winces at Bob's words, hopping off the high chair tripping a little over his own feet while walking to the room. 

"You know I can see why you fell in love with him, he has this quite special charm." 

Bob can't hide a smile, knowing exactly what Yelena means. 

As if it is second nature John made himself comfortable on the customer chair while Bob sat down on his swivel tool bracing himself for whatever idea John came up with this time. The least he expected was that John would show him his phone screen the picture of the word "Captain" in calligraphic letters shining back at him. 

"Oh my god. How-?"

"Ryan tried to do a double spin last practice and broke his neck." Bob's eyes widen in horror by the news and by the way John is able to say this so, casually. 

"That was a joke. He will transfer next week and the team wants me as a replacement."

"As they fucking should." Next Bob is all over John, first pulling him into a deep kiss then prepping a lot of small kisses all over his face. Even though it physically hurts John pushes Bob away just a little so he is able to talk. "You think you can still hold the gun or should I come back another day?"

Five minutes later Johns topless and the needle stitching into his skin. Despite the pain this was always his favourite part, watching Bob's eyes lighting up doing what he loves. John completely misses that Bob already applied the foil, only a tug on his belt catches his attention. 

"What are you doing?" His pants and boxers are already down at the end of his question. 

"You worked so hard and did so well, you deserve a reward. captain." With the last word Bob winks and licks over his lips, John is dead by then and brought back to life when Bob swallows his dick whole in a single motion. Johns biting down on his tongue hard knowing fully well that Yelena is still somewhere in the studio, what they can't know is that Yelena was smart enough to move her client all the way to the back of the studio into room number 8. 

It doesn't matter a lot, it's not like John is lasting long anyway, he never does when Bob sucks him off. Honestly, how could he? With Bob's soft lips running up and down his sensitive skin, his tongue dancing around his tip, his locks bouncing up and down and his cute teary eyes looking up at him every now and then. No John lasts ten minutes max and Bob can tell exactly when short before coming. 

"Baby, can I can I-" Bob gives an approving thumbs up and John takes over for a few seconds spending himself all the way down Bob throat a cocky grin on his face. 

"Come here." John pulls Bob back onto his lap tasting himself in Bob's mouth, a sudden knock on the door but an abrupt ending to their fun. 

"Bob! Your next client is here." 

They both make themselves decent and with a last big smooch Bob says goodbye. 

"See you at home Captain."

"Oh yes, you will." The smack on his ass lets Bob jolt forward, his smile bigger than before if that is even possible. When John's gone for just the glimpse of a second Bob thoughts spiral because with John being Captain his team has a realistic chance to win and that means he will be gone a lot longer than the last time.

-------------

To say that Bob has a complicated relationship with his birthday would have been an understatement. When he was younger it was always just another night he got wasted. At some point he just stopped celebrating altogether. With John as his partner that was basically impossible. It started small with sleeping in and a generous breakfast in bed then around 4 pm the guests arrived. Yelena and Kate were first of course, Joaqin brought some of his friends with him and around 6 everyone who mattered to Bob was there. 

It was mostly light chatting and cake. Bob insisted on no candles, his only rule for the day. John told him that he would waste his wish but Bob simply already had everything he could wished for and more. 

The gifts were, let's say, special this year. At least Bob couldn't make sense of them. An inflatable neckpillow, a travel mug, noise canceling headphones and a powerbank? Not what he expected yet he was grateful, he always is. To no one's surprise Kate and John go along quite well since Kate is heavily involved in the volleyball scene, she plays in the major league, Yelena made sure nobody ever forgets that. 

Around ten everyone is gone and John is quick in cleaning everything up, in the meantime Bob takes some time to recharge in the form of a long bubblebath. After drying himself up and putting on his favourite pyjamas. consists of one of John's old sweatpants he has to tie peculiarly tight and one of John's Hoodies Bob aims for the door of their small balcony. 

"You can smoke inside, if you want." 

"Really?" Both of them had their own rules. For Bob there was no blender in the morning, no workouts at night and for John it was no smoking inside so Bob takes this opportunity with joy. 

Not wanting to mess up the couch Bob sits down right in front of it, placing everything he needs on the low coffee table. When he is right at filling the paper John joins him on his right side. Bob doesn't miss how John is eyeing him from the side. 

"If it bothers you so much I can still go."

"It's fine. It's just, the way you're doing this, it just looks good.“ 

That earns a huff and a shy smile from Bob. With the first hit his muscles already start to relax, his back falling slack against the couch. With a sudden, quick motion the blunt is out of Bob's hand and between John's fingers in the last second Bob secures the back of his hand over John's mouth. 

"No no no, what do you think you're doing kid?" 

"You seem relaxed, I want to relax too." 

"I don't want to be the reason you're getting kicked off of your team."

"They don't do drug tests at practice and I‘m off for the rest of the week." Since it's just Bob regular Blunt Size he gives in. Without a second thought John moves the tip close to his mouth and as expected chokes on the first hit, coughing heavily while Bob has to repress a laugh. 

"Don‘t tell me you didn't even smoked a cigarette before?" 

"I never will, that stuff is disgusting." John is still coughing, handing the joint back to Bob. 

"You just did it wrong?"

"What do you mean I did it wrong? How can you smoke wrong?" This time its Bob who moves without thinking, caging John under him. 

"You tried to smoke with your mouth but you want it in your lungs." As Bob puts on a show John looks up at him as if he just hung the whole night sky. 

"Get it now?" With his mouth slightly open John nods wanting to take the joint out of Bob's hand but he simply swats it away, instead he takes another drag but does not breathe it down. Slowly he leans down to be face to face with John putting on a little pressure on his mouth who then opens up. This time it feels different, the steam spreads everywhere and with a deep breath it ends up all the way in his lunges. 

They end up splitting, one drag for Bob one for John, when the burned down paper gets thrown into the ashtray a sudden boost overcomes John. His hands roam up and down Bob's back, his tongue inciting his mouth, as if John is on a mission to conquer Bob's body entirely. With a precise throw Bobs spread out on the carpet, John's body pressing into their lips never parting. 

While Bob's eyes are glassy, Johns are red, both of them feeling everything and not enough at the same time. Johns gets rid of Bob or rather his sweatpants. Bob doesn't check in this time, no are you sure, no you don't have to, he just lets John do what he wants to do with him. 

Of course Bob had sex stoned before but no man ever bothered to blow him while he was high, something only Bob would profit from. With the first dedicated lick from the base up to the tip his back is already arching off the ground, hands holding onto the jersey for dear life  "God John, this- this feels so fucking good, please don‘t stop." And there it is one of the sweetest sounds John could have asked for. Bob praised covered in whiny pleas. 

Now he is eager to hear more, his hands grab Bob's waist making sure that his cock disappears all the way inside John's mouth. More and More whines slip out of between Bob's lips until he goes quiet and breathless. When his hands grab John's hair he knows exactly what it means so he pushes down, secures Bob's waist in a tight grip and swallows. 

It's a first time for John in a way too, because he feels out of breath, like his body falling in on itself. With all the strength he has left he quickly pulls the pants up again knowing fully well we Bob would feel cold in a couple of minutes. Then he lets himself fall onto Bob like a weighted blanket burring his face in his neck. "Happy birthday baby."

Maybe if John hadn't said anything then maybe Bob wouldn't have started spiraling. Falling down the hole that's haunting him since the very beginning, the deep rooting acknowledgement that he prevents John from every experience he deserves. Bob clings his nails into John as hard as he can, scared that he could come to his senses any second and just leave him like so many others did before. 

Only when John feels a wetness on the side of his own cheek does he fully realize what is happening. At this point Bob's eyes are red too from his salty tears, his nose running a little. John pushes himself up, resting himself back against the couch, pulling Bob in his lap. His hands gently grazed the soft wet skin of Bob's cheek. "Sorry I didn't mean to hurt you, sorry." John's apologies make it worse, Bob's silent tears turn into devastating sobs. 

"John you did-you did nothing wrong. It's me, it's always me." John already starts to shake his head knowing fully well that wherever this is going there is no turning back now, no matter what he says or does so he just pulls Bob closer. 

"I can not give you what you want. Look around John, everyone's getting married, having children. You will grow old too and you will realize that there is nothing special about me…" From this point on Bob's voice cracks completely, his hands anchoring themselves somewhere in John's shirt. When Bob ebbs down the tiniest bit John talks into his ear, quiet and soft and assuring. 

"I dont care about the others, I dont care about some hypothetical children, I only care about us, about you ,okay?" Bob shakes his head, defeated, the voice inside his head making sure he never forgets that he doesn't deserve any of this. 

"I love you so god damn much it hurts Bobby. I wish I could show you, I wish you could see it." That's it, nothing left to say. Slowly John begins to cradle Bob just the tiniest bit and all he can do now is to wait, to stay with him and to never let him go. 

------------

The next morning Bob gets tickled awake by a beam of warm sunlight and a deep snore from underneath him. They spend the whole night like this, on the floor, John holding him till they both fell asleep. With a precise carefulness Bob manages to free himself from John's grip without waking him, the success is short lived. The loud crack coming from Bob's knees lets John's eyes shoot open. The adrenaline rushes through John in a big wave so he stands up and nearly falls to the ground. Bob catched him, he could already see that last night did something to John, everything else would have been a miracle since this was his first time smoking. 

"Easy kid." As wary as possible Bob moves John to sit on the couch. "Your Heads spinning?" John nods once and Bob brings him a glass of water. "I‘m never doing that again." Bob huffs. "The falling asleep on the floor or the smoking part?" "Both definitely both." John lets his head fall back to rest it on the couch meanwhile Bob stands up and walks over to the kitchen laughing his ass off.

Within 20 minutes breakfast is fully prepared and spread out on the coffee table in front of John who lets out a deep, whiny groan. "Thanks but I‘m not hungry." Bob answers with scoff in his tone "The appetite comes with the eating, remember?" Of course John remembers because he says this to Bob at least once a week. 

Bob generously spreads some of the scrambled eggs on the toast and slowly moves it up to John's mouth. After the first bite John is basically back to his regular self eating like he's been starving for days. With the dishwasher signifying its cleaning cycle John attempts to stand up again. „I really want to take a shower but I need someone to come with me.“ "Is that so?" "Yeah in chase, I‘m you know, falling again." 

It's not like Bob wasn't in need of a shower so this was fine, the warm droplets relaxing against his skin. To prevent himself from starring and getting a boner right now he fixed his gaze on the ceiling. His mind wandered back a few months ago when they planned their apartment together. Bob was worried about the money all the time and rolled his eyes when John told him he wanted the shower extra spacious and a large showerhead. Bob's jaw dropped at the price now he was just grateful that he wasn't able to talk him out of it. 

"I just wanted to say I meant everything I said last night." 

"John, I know. I don't know what has gotten into me last night I-"

"No, if that's how you're feeling then that's okay. I just wish you would talk to me more often about what bothers you." It stings for a second, John can not know that with him Bob is the most talkative and outgoing he has ever been, he feels completely secure in his relationship but how is John supposed to know that?

"I’m trying, I really do, it's just hard sometimes."

"I know." John closes the distance between them with a kiss so tender Bob wonders if it is even real. With their lips locked John remembers that he wanted to ask Bob something, given what happened last night he will hold onto his patience for the next week. 

On Wednesday he kicks the door open, Bob nearly drops his book and eventually sits upright on the couch. His gaze immediately drops to the bouquet of flowers and the chocolate Bob loves with an unhealthy passion.

"Hey Bobby."

"God what did you do this time?" And John starts to talk. He explains that over the course of the last few months he talked a lot with Yelena and Jaoquin it took some time to convince them but they eventually agreed knowing that Bob would be happier with John. He chatters about how picky they were when it came to picking out the right equipment. How the talk with his coach was just a simple "One more won't be a problem as long as they pay for it." 

Suddenly his birthday gifts make a lot more sense. 

"So do I understand you right? You want me to go with you every season?" John nods grinning like this is the best idea anyone ever had. 

"And you expect me to do what? Be some kind of travelling tattooist?" Again John nods, this time even more frantic. 

"John, most of my clients are regular or their friends and family. I don't have any connections outside of this state or even this city. Your season starts in one month. How-"

"Wait before you tell me what a horrible plan this is, let me show you something." John pulls out his phone and opens his instagram which was weirdly enough because he normally doesn't use any social media. It seems he made an exception, his page is flooded with pictures but of himself, not really. Most of them were tattoos the ones Bob made, every now and then there were ideas from his sketchbook. Bob's cheeks start to redden at the sight, a wave of sweat washing over him not because John posted those without his permission, they will talk about this another day, not because of the amount of likes. The comments were flooded with people saying they want the same and that the artwork looks amazing. 

Bob wishes he could disappear into the floor. "You don’t have to say anything, just think about it, okay? Maybe we can try it for just one season at first. I just thought that way we could have it all. We can both do what we love and be with one we love." 

Bob nods and vanishes into his own thoughts. "We could have it all." Is he even deserving of that? 

From the exhaustion Bob falls asleep before practise so John tugs him under the blanket, leaves with a kiss to his forehead and leaves him be. An hour or so later Bob shoots awake, pupils blown wide, his curls clinging to his forehead in sweaty strands. He doesn't bother to wait, he reaches out for his phone. 

"Hey, is everything alright? I only have five min-" 

"Let's do it." Bob's words shoot out of his mouth and hit John like a bullet, he needs a second to process what Bob just agreed to. 

"Are you really sure? You can think about it a little lon-"

"I don't need more time to think about it. I just need you okay? I don't want to waste anymore time."

"Thank god, it would have been pretty embarrassing to cancel the 35 reservations."

Bob's heart starts to race. "The what?!"

-------------

Yes, it hurt. It hurt to leave his so well known studio behind. To say goodbye to his friends and still he smiled, squirming in his seat next to John with an anticipation burning in his bones to finally see some things he never seen before, talk to some people he never talked to before. Still the most important part about all of this was that their relationship would stop feeling like a weekend get-away. 

As expected the start was a little bumpy given Bob's personality yet with every day with every new client and other tattooist it got better and John's game got better too. It got so good that this time they qualified for the god damn cup. The only downside was that as expected the public picked upon them fast. The fact that John's favourite Tatooiest was in every city he was and attended all of his games was simply enough evidence and to his own surprise Bob didn't care as much as he thought he would. It was quite the opposite, he felt relieved even though it was hard sometimes but John made sure to shut everyone up as fast and as well as he could and that kept Bob's thoughts quiet on most days too. 

Then finally it happened. The Floridian Panthers against the Edmonton Oilers. The stadium is buzzing with energy. Bob had attended so many games at this point but this time it was just different. He was not freezing for a second, quite the opposite, his thick coat and the adrenaline make sure that no part of his skin stays sweat free. After the first half, the points are equal. There are a lot of fouls, yellow cards rain down every ten minutes. Someone's getting brought to the hospital and between all of this is John. Standing tall and sure not a bit of uncertainty on his face. Two minutes before the time is up it is still equal, Bob's jaw is clenched it hurts, some blood pooling in his mouth, the sound of the puck getting shot, then deafening applause and cheers.

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He doesn't know why he is so nervous knocking on the door with one and while fiddling at the hem of his shirt with the other. 

"It's open." The smell of sweat and shampoo hits his nose at once, the steam of the showers lingering warm in the room. He can not stop himself from licking over his lips since John is just standing there with nothing but a towel around his waist.

"Hey."

"Hey. Are you alone?"

"Yes, sorry that I’m late. We had a lot to discuss."

"No problem." Bob hides his hands behind his back and skillfully locks the door without looking. 

"What are you doing?" 

"Oh nothing, just keeping my promise." John tilts his head then it dawns on him his face lighting like he just cracked the jackpot, which he basically did. 

Bob takes a deep breath and then he strides over to John and pushes him down to lay down on the bench, getting rid of his pants and brief first, the jersey long enough to cover his already present erection. With a single move his legs are on both sides caging John underneath him he’s right at attacking John's neck whose eyes drop to Bob's hand stopping him with a hand to his chest. 

"What is that?"

"Hm? Oh shit I almost forgot." Bob holds his closed fist in front of John's face whose jaw simply drops to the floor of the locker room. There is a big and beautifully written 11 on Bob's skin. 

"Oh my-. Is this permanent?" 

"I don’t do things half-heartedly, kid." The energy shifts, John shoots up from his position hugging Bob and prepping small kisses on his face. "That is so fucking hot." In this position Bob can feel through the towel that John is as hard as himself. It sends a shiver through Bob's spine when John starts placing kisses right next to his ear, his voice low yet a little whiny. "Please can I fuck you?" Bob lets out a playful huff. "I mean how could I say no to such a handsome and strong-" He does not get to finish his sentence, John knows exactly what he wants. His towel ends up on the bench to provide a little comfort. Bob's chest is on the bench now, back in a beautiful arch, at the sight one of John's eyebrows goes up in surprise. "You came prepared?" "I thought about this for the last two weeks, yes I came prepared." Carefully John pulls out the plug and replaces it with his cock. 

The angle is so deep and intense that Bob moans grows louder with every inch of John pushing inside him, when fully bottomed out John places his hand over Bob's mouth "You know that just because the room is empty doesn't mean nobody is in the building right?" Bob nods his mind all fogged up. "You don’t care right?" Again Bob just nods allowing himself to rest his head on the bench. "Fuck."

The floor under the bench legs creak violently. Bob's panting mix with some high whines and deep sobs all the while behind him can't get enough gripping onto Bob's hips so hard he can feel the bones underneath the skin. The second John catches that Bobs legs are shaking he presses him down so he completely lays on the towel, legs now dangling off the bench. 

For a few seconds John slows down, taking his time to kiss up Bob's spine, burring his face in Bob's neck. "I love you so fucking much." With his words John pulls Bob's inked hand in his other covering his mouth again, it does not help much. When they come, Bob's moan is guttural and breathless, John's groan getting swallowed by Bob's skin. 

It's a little mean but once John Walker smells blood, there's no stopping him. He retreats as slow as Bob can handle it but instead of carrying him into the shower he pushes the plug back in. "What the hell are you doing?" John turns Bob around and pulls him into his lap admiring every drop of sweat, every inch of flush, every lock of his hair that's out of place. "I have a lot of plans for tonight." His grin is close to devilish but the silly wriggle of his eyebrows make up for it. "At least if you can catch up old man." "Pff, I bet you to it kid." 

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John brought the engagement ring one month into the relationship and Yelena and Joaquin are hiding it for him in the studio. Their getting married on their third anniversary.