#self-reflection meme

“I’ve been called old a few times recently. It feels strange. I don’t feel that old, but I suppose I might seem that way to those who have seen their twentieth summer only recently or who have yet to see it. Still, what is most important to me is that I stay healthy and can keep working.”

Self-Reflection | ACCEPTING!

Tazz likes her home well enough, but she feels that it’s lonely. She prefers having company or being away from home on missions because she doesn’t like being left alone with her thoughts for too long as she tends to dwell on darker things. She likes how her house is structured and decorated, but she thinks it’s too quiet when she’s alone.

Sometimes she’ll have Kurohi with her since the home is big enough for him to reside in as well, but he can’t stay all the time since it would be impractical because of his size and would require more energy for him to maintain his smallest size.

“I might be many things: a bruiser, an 'venturer, a big party animal... but besides and maybe even 'fore all o’ that, I’m a woman.”

(Haldswys considers herself a woman, and it bears some significance to her. It doesn’t detract from or add anything to her work, but it plays a part in how she acts, dresses and so forth. Transitioning felt like getting pieces of a puzzle fit together, and it brought her comfort and peace of mind.)

“Once, someone called me ‘sir’, and it felt puzzling and empowering at the same time. Another time I found myself yearning for those days when I’d watch the dawn on the Sagolii sands with my skirt fluttering the breeze. Am I a man? No, I’m not... but ‘woman’ sits on my tongue just as ill.”

(Brenda’s gender identity is a bit fluid, and usually they prefer to be referred as ‘adventurer’ rather than any gendered moniker. Sometimes the uncertainty makes them feel almost guilty for doing or liking things that are traditionally associated with one gender or the other, but they try not dwell on it too much or especially show it.)

“...Does it matter?”

“I don’t usually think much about my height. Compared to many people in Eorzea or the men of the Steppe, I may seem small, but I am fairly average for my kind. It doesn’t affect my life much, whether in good or bad, and so I am content with it.”

“Ah, I try to keep myself in a good fit for working, but... I admit, I'm a little worried about my strength now that I’m not actively training at the Gladiator’s Guild anymore. I try to make up for that for doing heavy lifting and other similar tasks at the household when they are needed, especially since I’m not that well suited for delicate work.”

“I am a Kha from the Steppe. Even though I haven’t received a warm welcome in all places of Eorzea, I’ve never wanted to be anything else than what I am. Being a Xaela is what I am, even when I am far away from home.”

“Romance is a lovely idea and something that I’d like to experience one day, I think, but... I’m not sure how. There was a time when I held feelings for someone, but I didn’t dare to speak in the fear of ruining our friendship... and when I finally did tell her, she had already chosen another person. It’s sometimes difficult to see the difference between politeness and... kindness that stems from a deeper connection, and I’m still worried about mistaking the two.”

“I had a good childhood. Both my parents cared for me, and our family had its place in the tribe: my mother made cups and bowls, and my father hunted with the others. We got to serve guests quite often, and those days were my favourite.”

“When I got older, my father started taking me with him when he went to hunt or scout. I’m not sure how my mother felt about it, but she never spoke against it, either; I liked going with him when we had no guests at home. I think he and I might have been a bit similar.”