#selangkir

so. hisui. my love. my light. very limited experience with romance and very specific and defined views as to what a romantic partnership looks like according to the way ishigami village works with its very small amount of people.

i like can't even describe what i want to say im literally like vibrating rn thinking about it. she's so stand-offish but she is so very in touch with her emotions. she feels things very wholly, very intensely. usually it's easy to tell exactly how she's reacting to something - she does not have any kind of poker face - except for when it comes to chrome fussing over her, then she's leading the masterclass in pain masking deception lmao.

my rough outline -

so, when this guy she's been mad at for weeks starts to actually follow through on what he's saying (re: helping save the village priestess, teaching her brother more about science, writing with her, etc) and she can see how much the benefits of his presence (making ishigami village food secure, inventions that take the villagers far beyond just living to survive) have outweighed the negatives (he sleeps in her hut and is a little mean sometimes... really that's it) she's finally able to roll back on her angst a little bit, realizing maybe things weren't as bad as her dooming made it out to be.

so now, as she's participating in these schemes and projects he's cooking up, she's actually able to sit down and learn about the kind of person he really is, not the kind of person she's made him out to be. it's around the end of fall/beginning of winter when they're in the lab, and she's watching him try over and over and over to perfect the filament of this thing he calls a lightbulb when it just kind of hits her, i guess. she's drawn to his unwavering dedication, his relentlessness to make what he says into reality, resourcefulness, and the stupid way he can't look people in the eye when he makes things to help improve their quality of life. (more more more on that of course but i do not want to keep you here for an hour while i talk about all the ways she's writing down on her tablets that she loves him)

she knows right away; her emotions she's usually so in touch with shift out of wack, she's getting anxious when he asks for her opinions or expertise, and she remembers the way chrome talks about ruri... it's all adding up!

and now they need to go on this expedition together, because she and chrome know the best mineral heavy caves in the area, then gen tells her when they get back it'll be senkuu's birthday (big tradition in the modern world, he says, and hisui gets all o_O about it), and that sounds like the perfect time to tell him how she feels because (and he would agree) keeping all that inside was just illogical...

only the time period of a few days keeps her from telling him, otherwise she's all in!

until she does tell him and finds out the modern view of relationships is far different to that of ishigami village. her expectations are completely misaligned with his, which wouldn't even be the worst of it unfortunately. "we're about to go to war," he says "do you think the leader of our army getting a girlfriend is the best idea right now?" and she has to ask "what's a girlfriend?" because she thought she would be getting a husband............😭

(does he care for her at this point? of course he does (ALL men in my stories fall HARD or i will ***) (he is stupid obsessed with her), and he's been showing her in his own little ways, but he's got his reasons for turning her down at this point in their story)

AUGH it's fine she's fine she always bounces back, but she's very clear in telling him that her feelings are not contingent on him reciprocating. their relationship doesn't change, but her feelings stay the same. so now my girls got all this yearn bottled up inside her (maybe yearn isn't the right word? unrequitedness doesn't feel right either, because he does care for her.....) that she doesn't know what to do with.

and now she's back in the lab, looking across the way at this guy who's made such a positive impact in not only her life, but the lives of everyone in her village, who is hellbent on saving every single person on the planet from the world calamity event that changed the trajectory of their entire lives, and she's just...... so in love with him...... and she can't do a thing about it......

but don't worry! i'll fix it all, in a few dozen chapters after all that :3 gotta have a little angst so the pay off is ten billion times better. my girls just gotta have her yearning era for a little bit......

literally screaming shaking crying sobbing shaking my fist in the air falling to my knees in the dirt cursing god throwing up!!!!!!!!!!

book list:

i did not read any books this month. please feel free to throw some virtual stones at me <3

fic list:

work by @selangkir

bonus gtr scene!

THIS BOY.... sneaking in to delete his evidence i can't.... but i think you really nailed his relationship with gustavo and kelly in this small blrub. you're always so thoughtful about how your characters interact and i think this is displayed very well here :)

2. work by @skyj80

btr cuddle drabbles

AHH!! this was so cute!! btrtv focuses so little on the guys individual relationships so i love how you were able to make logan and carlos' your own in this drabble!! effortless dialogue that felt like i was watching a scene of the show and their comfortability with each other (so i knowww this is going on A LOT) was just so sweet. i love them so much! and i can tell you do too!

3. work by @naquey / @allthistrashtalkmakemeitchin

gift

booklist:

Summer Reading by Jenn McKinlay(18+!)

• review: this was a solid read. nothing incredible, but definitely better than some of the other crap i've read this year lol. i enjoyed the dynamic between the fmc - a dyslexic chef named sam - and the mmc - a librarian named ben - and the interesting relationship between someone who hates to read and someone who's life revolves around books. honestly i was really interested to see how this played out between the two of them, but like one week into them fooling around he begins to read a book aloud to her and the conflict is magically solved. sam just loves audiobooks now and i wish the author had done more with that. both sam and ben have goals they're striving to reach and i love that ben is able to see his through to the end, but the reader is kind of left wondering about sam's and i would have loved for that threat to have been tied up, but overall this was a cute read. my only real issue with this story was the quality of writing. there were some parts that were super cringe and were clearly written by a millennial emulating the 'how do you do fellow kids' meme that i could've gone without... anyway. i really enjoyed the relationship exploration between sam and her budding teenager brother. after not being in each others lives for a bit, i thought their bonding over the summer was adorable :) would've loved to read a book just about them tbh. neither of the main characters were the kinds of characters to write home about, but overall i did enjoy the progression of their relationship. just kind of a middle-ground novel.

• rating: 3/5 seasons of the bear that taught me all i know about cooking

fic list:

assorted works of @ceruleanmusings <3

look around your world, pretty baby

Blood Diamond; Year Four

i could always write literal essays on your work i swear to god but these two works this month really got to me as per usual. the first mickames one shot for james canon bday was so freaking adorable. i had literal butterflies in my stomach like i was there on the date with them... despite the urgency of the time crunch, which you did exellent in making it seem like it was somehow slow and fast at the same time, god i read this like three times over. mickey and james are just my favorite ;-;!! and blood diamond always hitting in the feels of course... this one in particular really got to me though. the combination of brooke's annoyance with james the last few chapters really came to a head here at the hair salon. he's just a kiddo!! let him play in peace!! and then her figuring out a way to potentially exploit his singing talent... i'll wring her neck i swear. as always tysm for sharing and tagging me in your works 😭 i could read them forever and ever and ever <3

2. assorted works of @partiallypearl/ @praetoravila <3

it's nowhere close to closing time

all over again

be my weekend lover (but don't be my friend)

can i have this dance?

lolive kissssss

you got me paralyzed

you know all my deep dish

this is such a STACKED LINE UP AUGH!! from the beginning with it's nowhere close to closing time... kogan... save me.... i love the first chapter introduction to both the characters and the setting. it's been so exciting theorizing how the story will play out from here and i can't wait to read more!! and of course... all over again with olive my beloved... i just can't get enough of logan and olive and their fucked up little relationship. jo's party chapter literally had me shitting my pants ngl and you already know im thinking of lolive on a daily basis. they're my roman empire i stg... the other three lolive on shots had me by the neck too - from the conversation with kendall 👀 to the quinceañera chapter to their KISS augh im too obsessed for my own good... and saylors introduction one shot!!! ahh!!!! you always have such interesting and well-rounded ocs i'm so jealous!!! i can't wait to learn more about saylor and their relationship with both kendall and lucy :)) macie's story too... she and katie are so adorable. i love the dynamic you've set up between the two of them as they both navigate hollywood!! obsessed as always. im up in your dms literally every single day gushing and i wouldn't have it any other way!!!!!!! <3

3. assorted works of @selangkir <3

mrs. knight one shot

girl time rush (anniversary reread🙏)

iconic work as ALWAYS!!!!!! i truly think your character interptetations of btr/side characters/ocs are so unique and bring such a fresh perspective to the story! the mrs. knight one shot, on top of being hilarious, began to expand on her pretty one dimensional characterization in such a short story and it blew me away. unmatched creativity!! lord knows she needed the j anyway if im being COMPLETELY honest. and i cannot believe gtr turned one year old this month what the fuck!! what the actual fuck!! i swear i've read all three chapters about a bazillion times. ty for being so accepting of roxy and using her as a vessel to tell your story too <3 i'd be lying if i said i wasn't so inspired by sabrina carpenter rn i already have another chapter draft of my own cooking in the google docs..... <33

4. assorted works of @inkameswetrust <3

the windowsill pt. 4

the windowsill pt. 5

oh LORD such incredible updates to this sweet story. these chapters always pack such a punch! i expect nothing less from kames fan #1... im obsessed with the continued relationship between katie and kendall in pt 4. btrtv lacks so heavy on their sibling-ness so i always love seeing it expanded on in fic! and JAMES AND KENDALL GOING OFFICIAL AOAJFOBOBGA i had knots in my stomach! you've also so clearly set up stakes and kendall's future fears it's so genuine and just real it hits so hard. pt 5 with brooke had me almost throwing my phone at the wall if im being honest. the way she spoke to kendall was bonechilling and i'm nervous yet excited for their future together <3 never stop kamesing the world needs it so so sos sooo bad !!!

5. assorted works of @naquey / @ithinkyouhealedmyheart

ghostwriter chapter 1

ghostwriter chapter 2

booklist:

despite buying so many books this month. i finished none of them. currently working on funny story by my goddess emily henry....

fic list:

1. assorted works of @partiallypearl/ @praetoravila <3

promise me, i'm never gonna find you fake it

i know you know (i got your heart thumping)

it's nowhere close to closing time ch 2

all over again ch 9

the way you toyed with my emotions this month... jesus christ... from lolive to kogan i love my oblivious idiots in love so much. when i tell you i think about ikyk (igyht) like once a day im being so serious - that is peak lolive to me!!!!!!!!!!! promise me... is just so adorable as well. something about our sweet California girl olive not knowing how to dress appropriately for the winter especially in minnesota.... lord... logan is so attentive!! he loves his gf so much augh!!!! these snippets fuel me while the main timeline lolive are thrust into... whatever they're doing rn... olive's birthday chapter had me in tears ngl. if you need someone to come and beat up her parents, put me in coach! so masterfully written though, the emotions were swirling in my brain ages after i finished the chapter. augh! and nowhere close to closing time... save me... the introduction of the boys were so sweet - it's always interesting to see everyone's takes on majors/areas of study hehe early friendship kogan means sooo much to me... don't worry logan! those glances sure mean something!!!!!! <333

2. assorted works of @selangkir <3

jocy story!!!!

omfggggg god the way you write is just so gorgeous; painting pictures with your words is so hard to do and you make it look so EASY RAUGH!!!!! i really love how you take lucy and jo's typical characterization and flip it, where lucy is a lot more unsure + unconfident whereas jo was the one pushing her to start playing again. i can't really explain why that stood out to me, but i sure loved it!! excited to read more of your work in the future hehe!! <33

3. assorted works of @naquey / @ithinkyouhealedmyheart <3

ghostwriter ch 9-17

30 days of November!!

Drake loves Marnie

Carlos x Reader

such a productive writing month for you - i am so inspired by your creative spirit. the time and effort you put into each one of these projects is clear throughout the work!! wonderfully done and you always leave me wanting to read more... then just my luck a new chapter appears haha! though i'm slowly making my way through ghostwriter, this subset of chapters i read this month had me howlingggg kenonnie (affectionately) make me want to tear my hair out!!!! i love how ridiculous they are and reluctant to admit they like each other (even if i am admittedly team curt... just a teeny bit...) they compliment each other so well! the starstruck chapter was *chefs kiss* in addition, the 30 days of November prompts was such a wonderful way to get to know a lot of the other characters in the story, as well as some of your other characters too!! the flower series is woven together so interestingly + i can't wait to read more!! additionally, i loved getting to know more about drake + marnie in their wedding one shot, it was adorable! idk anything about drake and josh so i'm taking your word as gold on this one... i love them soooo much!! and of course!! your carlos x reader story had me rolling on the floor with laughter!! your take on rames is everything to me.... <3

4. assorted works of @icegirl2772 <3

Take A Shot In The Dark ch 17

AHHHHHHH!!!!!! IT'S HAPPENING!!!!!!!!!! STAY CALM EVERYONE IT'S HAPPENING!!!!!!!!!!!! to be here for this monumental moment in james and kaelyns relationship... wow..... AJFBAJFB im so excited for the next chapters... kendall is going to have to get cool w some things superrr quickly👀 this chapter had everything, action, romance, tension... augh.... like james, i feel similarly about neil. so it was great to see him get knocked around :) love it when my boys get into fights in the name of those they love :)))))))))))))) <3333

5. assorted works of @fiyero33053 / @fiyero0533

promptober one-shot 27!!

promptober one-shot 28!!

fic list:

assorted works of @ceruleanmusings <3

Blood Diamond; Year Five

ahh!! the blood diamond one shots are always so enjoyable to read and that make me think so much about my own characters and their backstories and childhoods as well. this one in particular really got to me; there isn't much room for childhood discussion in btrtv and the way you characterize young kendall and james made me MELT. so accurate to real kids, first of all, but there was so much shared about each other with just a few lines of dialogue. katie tugging james' hair at the end is like. the perfect precursor to their relationship as they grow older too lmao! i always look forward to your work :) <3

2. assorted works of @partiallypearl / @praetoravila <3

adorable kaela blurb

lolive ghost blurb

mighta found the one (but i need you too)

'cause i don't wanna keep you guessing

ipod shuffle challenge

all over again

pearl... darling.... there is nothing i love seeing more than your lovely works! from our dms to your full works, you are truly so creative it blows my mind! this month was no exception. the kaela blurb already had me by the throat... those two mean the world to me i mean it! and the various lolive blurbs and all over again... lord you had me crying with the last chapter of that one... and of course... the wag au one-shot... you are so sweet to me and my baby girl roxy, and that blurb had me literally giggling and kicking my feet hehehe. tysm for the sweet gift for my birthday <3 and your iPod shuffle challenge was so interesting! i love all the stories you chose to tell and how every word in the small drabbles packed a punch!!!! lovely as always <33 tysm for sharing :)))

3. assorted works of @selangkir <3

promptober one-shot!!

aughauifafvaibie there are never enough words to describe how well you write katie and the knights. even if this was just a short story reworked to be in kendall's pov, the strong ties between them are evident and i love the little quirks and rituals they all have that you sneak in there. how kendall instantly knows something wrong with katie, how katie pushes back against him, everything is just *chefs kiss* excited to read katie's pov if you ever wish to share that as well!!! <33

4. assorted works of @inkameswetrust <3

date night

god. in kames we DO trust. everything about this one-shot had me going through like. every single emotion possible for a person to feel. lyn is the character of all time + i love how james (and kendall, reluctantly) got to participate in a scheme akin to their youth to make sure her date goes perfectly :)) and the dual line between what was going on with lyn and Nathan helped kendall and james learn more about each other - even after being together for so long!! thought about this one for days ngl and the drawings you made live in my head rent free. im just 1000% obsessed thank you so so so much for sharing :)

5. assorted works of @naquey / @ithinkyouhealedmyheart <3

ghostwriter ch 3-8

AHHHHH RONNIE MY SWEET MY LOVE MY EVERYTHINGGG god the story you are weaving her for and kendall have me (affectionately) tearing my hair out. the way these chapters set up her relationships with most of the main characters is just so special. though everyone is just a little bit different than one another, and all the teens have their own special quirks, they're all still able to get along and make friends. i imagine in the tough Hollywood industry, that's all they have. ronnie slowly getting to know and opening up to the other girls, the band, guitar dude, and everyone else is so sweet! each chapter brings a new understanding to her character, and i love every little thing about her :) getting to read her and kendall's story is a privilege!! so excited for their future heheh <33

6. assorted works of @icegirl2772 <3

Take A Shot In The Dark Ch. 16

eee kaelyn!!! my sweet sweet girl!! this chapter follows one of my favorite episodes, and i love all the special additions you made for kaelyn and her story. so happy to read that she and neil are over... now james can step in and pick up her broken heart!! akifaiufaiufbaie i can't wait for them to get together, you've got me on the edge of my seat :))) <3

7. assorted works of @fiyero3305 / @fiyero0533

promptober one-shots!!

MY FRIEND!!!!!!!!!!! thank you so much for using my prompt list, i'm so happy you were able to find inspiration from the things i put together this month :) though i am just a casual fan of the umbrella academy, from my two seasons of knowledge, i'm confident in saying i love your version of the characters even more lol! each blurb brought in a new sibling dynamic, something of your own to bring to the table. just blew me away, truly. my favorite was the cemetery prompt you wrote with ben. got my heart squeezing harder than ever before! and the one with the psychic and klaus and allison was soooo so so good. so happy you were able to get these out and share them ;) looking forward to more in the future

8. assorted works of @bunnyfern

a field of blooming tulips