#second guessing everything

i just wanna post ch11 of kickoff n get it out there but my fucking mind is a prison and keeps telling me it aint shit n i should give up on my hopes n dreams and also should still be embarrassed about that one thing i said five years ago

Not a good night... Am awake for at least half an hour already and barely slept before. Normally cuddling helps but nah

I wear rose-tinted glasses until they're violently ripped off of me.

many many thoughts

Trust issues are getting out of hand. It’s debilitating my relationship with others. I can’t bring myself to believe anything people say anymore. In my head I’m always like “no you’re probably doing some shady shit” “no you’re lying” “no” “you’re lying” “lies” “no”

Maybe I’m not him....

struggling today bc 90% of my ability to human well with others comes from body language and that’s not an option rn

It’s weird how change makes you feel lost. I find myself just sitting around not knowing what to do in my free time. So sleeping it is. That is when there isn’t a cat meowing in my face. I think they feel a little lost too. Binx especially, as he has been seeking attention the most.