I've been having a rough time lately. That means I'm craving angst! ....with a happy ending 😅
Specifically focused around SE system timeline.
MC that's fallen in love with the system members over the course of getting to know them, meeting Saeran at some point after Mint Eye and slowly building deep bonds with him and the other members of the system over a long while. Let's say MC is also good friends with Saeyoung and they confided to him about being in love with Saeran, Suit, and Ray.... and Saeyoung accidentally let it slip to Saeran- and, well, there's a domino of reactions to finding that out.
SE Saeran wasn't meant for that life, wasn't meant to feel love. He's detached, just figuring out how to breathe one day to the next. He's come a long way from Mint Eye, but he's still suffering, still healing. He doesn't know how to accept anyone feeling that way about him when he feels like a monster. He feels avoidant, and isolates from the MC without telling them why. I think he would just get a bit distant.
SE Suit, well... I think he would have a domino reaction to how SE Saeran is feeling. Maybe he's more outright cold to the MC. Avoidant in a way that just feels more harsh? He doesn't know how to process vulnerable feelings, he doesn't know how to protect someone else without this fear he's going to crush them. He feels like a monster, too. Him and Saeran I think would feel very similarly, and respond really similarly!
Ray, on the other hand, is maybe just confused? I don't think he'd be able to overtake the other two with their strong emotions and reach out to the MC. In fact he might end up getting pushed back really far due to their avoidance. He wants love, he wants to be loved, and he at least knows how he feels about the MC- but he's drowned out and silenced.
I wonder how long a cycle of avoidance would last where the MC slowly but surely becomes very negatively effected by the situation. They don't know Saeyoung let their feelings slip, but they have a suspicion, and they feel horrible for being in love with them- they can't help it! But they adore the system and have grown closer to them than anyone, and it's crushing them to be cut out from their lives.
I need a happy ending built into this but man I'm just stuck on the pain and angst of it
It's hard to feel loved when you don't know how to love yourself. That is the case for SE Saeran, and to some extent, Suit Saeran, too. How in the world can someone love you when you think of yourself as the worst person you can imagine? Saeran's hands are caked in blood he can't wash off, and Suit Saeran's mind is constantly plagued with old nightmares about the man he turned into to protect Ray until he was snuffed out for years, too.
Avoidance is definitely Suit Saeran's game. It's easier to pull away than it is to subject you to the possible worst-case scenario. Anger isn't something he can suppress, and when SE Saeran's reached his limit, that's when he steps in to take control, just as he did when Ray could no longer handle the agony given to him by Rika's hand.
He is the one who survives, who suffers for them, and who bites his tongue no matter how much he wants something. It will make him a miserable man, but what is misery if not the best company for a man who calls himself a monster? Oh, how he wants you, though. He is a man who yearns as hard as someone could, and yet he will hold back until the universe explodes if you don't step in and tell him it's okay to be selfish.
SE Saeran... well... he would avoid you, too, but for a different reason. He is afraid of hurting you, not because he thinks of himself as a real monster, but because he fears he cannot control himself. He has the worst night terrors that cause him to wake up, scream, and destroy a great deal of his room on occasion. He would never forgive himself if he hurt you, wilfully or not. He considers you to be the greatest thing to have happened to him, you know? If he hurts the person who has taken a chance on him, he may not be worth the trouble.
It's this insecurity that makes it easier for him to pull away, and for Suit Saeran to step in with that desire to protect them from what'll possibly be a painful rejection, or a shiny future that could crumble in a matter of seconds, if not a few days. To know love briefly, only to be forced to leave because you weren't ready to love someone as much as they love you, sounds terrifying.
Wouldn't it be better to avoid it altogether? It's not a healthy way to think, but you can see why Suit Saeran and SE Saeran would fall into this frame of mind, right?
Now, Ray is hard to pin down without knowing the particulars of the relationship he's been trying to build with the MC. You're right when you say he yearns for a gentle affection, but there's a part of this that can easily become tangled with dread and shame. I know that he will let this get to him, whether he wants to or not. "What if they only love Saeran? What if they only want Saeran? What if they decide not to be with him because of me? What if they only want me, and I'm the very reason why Saeran is suffering? Why they're both suffering?"
He can avoid MC just as well as those two can, but his reasons aren't the same. I do think his desire to be with MC would make it hard for Suit Saeran, though. Because we know how he can be when he sees how much Ray wants something... to the extent that he was going to drag MC back to Mint Eye in V Route. In this case, though, it comes down to Suit Saeran having to debate what's better, letting Ray have a taste of joy, or holding back so Ray doesn't get hurt in the process of him trying to protect all three of them.
You can get a lot of angst out of this, but if you want a happy ending, I'll tell you the only solution is communication. They have to talk and meet each other in the middle three times. They have to find what's best for each of them and for MC. Make boundaries that work, make love a safe place to exist, and make sure you all know when enough is enough. Know when to let go and when to hold on! It won't be easy... not by any means, but you can make it work.
They HAVE to talk to one another to fix this pain. They cannot exist in silent suffering forever. I don't think they'll lock MC out, but it'll be... a difficult situation for a few weeks until they can figure out what this'll look like for them.
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I’ve been learning some kpop dances lately for funsies, I feel like that could be a cool bonding moment with Zen. We know he can dance, he’d definitely be willing to practice with me. And maybe Ray would be willing to record?
Oh, absolutely. Zen isn't a one-trick pony. He lives and thrives on learning new tricks and skills to add to his arsenal. He needs to be capable of learning on the fly, as well as being skilled enough to say he's got experience just in case it comes up. You'd be surprised at the stuff he picked up over the years on the streets and from his friends in show business. He knows way more about a ton of things than he does about specialized things.
He's right there with you. Step by step, really. He's not ashamed to try something and not get it right the first time. He is the hype man you deserve on your team! Hmmm. I think you could talk Ray into it with a nice little "Pretty, pretty, pretty, please? You're the best person for the job, Ray! You know how to handle that camera!"
Which member of the SE system do you think would respond best to you Infodumping about your interests? Because I just reread my favorite manga and people WILL hear about it. Mostly Saeyoung and Lila, but if anyone from the system gets caught in the crossfire then that’s on them
(Also hi!! It’s been a while, I miss you <3)
SE Ray loves to listen to your interests, hands down. He spends a lot of time working throughout the bunker on cleaning or cooking since that’s what gives him a sense of control. He is the most outwardly honest about enjoying listening to whatever it is that you have to talk about. There is never a shadow of a doubt about it! He loves knowing what makes you happy, since he makes sure to affirm that he's listening by engaging with questions now and again. You never have to think twice about it. You can count on him to look up from the table he’s working at to ask, “So, why did Tohru decide to do that?”
He’s also one of the two that will engage with you while other people are in the room! He doesn’t mind answering and talking back to you if Lila or Saeyoung are in the room! Those two don't bother him when it comes to focusing on making sure that you feel like somebody understands the things that matter the most to you. He knows that you need to be affirmed by more people than just him when it comes to this! Just... be mindful, he makes treats based on things in every one of the manga you read.
Grave [SE Suit Saeran] is the one that is hard to read. It's difficult to understand what's going on in his head because while he doesn't talk to you about what you're talking about, he doesn't tell you to go away when you do it. So, it's hard for you to know if he's annoyed by it or if he's actually interested. A part of you knows that he would send you away if he didn't have the time or patience to deal with this, but another part of you is still a little insecure about how he feels about it. He’s reading his own novel as you sit nearby on the floor, and that’s not not all that bad. Being with him gives you a quiet space to read.
However, it is the simple fact that you are alone with him that means there is a strong chance that he could ask you a single question at any point during your time together. Imagine the look of surprise on your face when he stops you mid-sentence to ask, “And why did Homura keep trying when it was only going to repeat itself again and again?”
SE Saeran is somewhere in the middle, and by that, I mean that you can guess that he’s bouncing between Ray’s interest and Grave’s interest. You don’t know what you get with him... sometimes he wants to listen and other times he makes no point to engage with you or listen. It really depends on how much energy he has and how willing he is to put up with what he's dealing with. He knows that it means a lot to you otherwise you wouldn't be spending so much time trying to tell him why you like it so much. He doesn’t get why it matters so much, but it clearly means a lot to you.
So, imagine that! You’re watching him work in his little garden while you sit on the edge of the back porch. He pauses, letting the tomato in his hand come to a rest as you stop to flip the page in your manga. “So, you’re telling me that there’s genuinely someone who is willing to risk the price of wishes coming with a cost if it means they can have something? All in the confines of a restroom? Who even writes these stories?”
Su-Jin [Kid Saeran] is the one that you already know is going to listen from the first second you speak to him. The only issue you'll have with him is the fact that he has a tendency to talk over you when you're talking but he does apologize for it after you tell him that that's rude. He gets excited because he can see you're excited so you're in for a lengthy conversation when you tell him that you'd like to tell him a story that you enjoy. He takes being told a story seriously since he's so easily swept away by whatever mystery you can give to him.
He likes to sit next to you in a blanket fort, reading over your shoulder as you take the time to tell him what’s going on in the story. With wide, interested eyes, he listens with a chatter. “So, when will the princess from the moon find out that she’s been so close to her prince all along, noona? Is it going to make her happy or sad... because she’s missed so much time with him again...”
I’m going to have the SE system watch Bluey with me because dragging people into my new interests is how I bond <3
That's so valid. I know that Su-Jin would enjoy it. You know as long as you get him invested in something with bright colors, he's down for a long time. Cartoons are easily his favorite thing in the world since he never got to appreciate them before he moved into the bunker. I can't say who his favorite might be, though. I'm not sure. Bingo, maybe?
I know Ray would have a lot of fun with it, too. He's always happy to engage with the media you love. I think the hard part would be just the fact that these educational characters leave him hurt about the past he experienced. In some ways, it's positive, because he knows that people aren't getting treated like he was, but... it's hard to see it happen when you wanted warmth.
SE Saeran and Grave have similar thought processes. They humor it because you pouted and puffed out your cheeks... but secretly, their enjoyment of it definitely exists. I'd say Saeran enjoys how easy it is to just sit back and let the noise play in the background and Grave is horrid about debating the pros and cons of how everyone reacts to a world of choices in cartoons like this. Saeran will never admit any of the characters are his favorite. [Grave won't either, but I'll tell you it's Bluey herself.]
In the SE System, who would relate to who in Encanto? OwO
It's an interesting question. I think it's a given that Grave feels like he relates to Luisa. That's because he's always trying to be the one who takes care of everyone through whatever means necessary. That can lead to him being seen as an angry brute most of the time... and that isn't who he is. That's rough, but, hey. It's got a lot to do with what he struggles with on a daily basis.
SE Saeran probably relates to Mirabel. He always felt like he was looking at Saeyoung and seeing someone strong and amazing while he had nothing to show for it. He had nothing... and he was just a boy who had a brother who meant more to the world than he did. I think it is likely that Ray likes Isabela, but he'd relate to Dolores. He seems to know things when he shouldn't and sometimes he's paranoid that a lot of people might judge him or think badly of him for what he knows about them.
And, clearly, Su-Jin likes Antonio. He likes animals and seeing a kid on the screen that can talk to them would make him really happy! He would be chattering away with his rabbit with the hope that he might be able to do the same someday.
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Speaking of Saeran in Obey Me, do you think he would be able to get along with Barbatos? And on a completely separate note, how do you think his system would come out n whatnot? Or would they try not to?
Barbatos does have some energy, alright. I think that SE Saeran would be able to interact with him without issue. Barbatos is respectful and knows how to mind a boundary. Saeran appreciates that much since he’s dealing with people who don’t know how to listen to him when he says something most of the time that he spends in the House of Lamentation. Saeran seems like his interactions with the butler of the future Demon King would be curt and respectful. I feel like they will bake stuff together in absolute silence. I don’t know why I’m getting that energy in this situation but it just seems like something they’d be able to do.
Saeran walks into the kitchen where Barbatos is, not saying anything but looking like a nervous wreck:
Barbatos, nodding knowingly and offering him an apron, because he knows why Saeran is here:
As far as my SE System, honestly, I didn’t think about it. I don’t think Su-Jin would feel safe or comfortable unless Simeon or Luke were around. SE Ray would be petrified of everything and... well, I can see him not minding Barbatos and Luke. But everyone else might be too much for him. Grave doesn’t give a fuck about the demons being powerful. I can see him enjoying time with Satan.
What would saying "I love you" to Ray, Suit Saeran, Unknown, SE!Saeran and the SE!personalities you created for him (with Su-Jin being platonic/family love instead of romantic) be like?
Ray would stare at you, almost in a daze, he wouldn’t be sure if he heard what you said properly. He would rub his hands against his face before he let out a low breath, trying to figure out what to say as the cogs tick in his head. Once he knows that he heard you right, he’s trying to make sure that you mean it, that it’s not a trick and that you’re saying this before you do care about him. He’ll grasp at your hands and stare into your eyes, that dreamy look washing over him as fast as it often does.
Suit Saeran would laugh right in your face if you said this to him before he was able to figure out he was sorry about everything. He would grasp you by the arm and yank you up so he could stare into your eyes, growling at you whilst saying that you cannot trick him the way that you tricked Ray. However, if you were to do this with his apology, he’d laugh, a bitter but quiet one, as he stared ahead at the wall, thinking that he’s done nothing to deserve your love. He’s not earned this right. He can’t.
GE Saeran is so weightless when you say that you love him. He can’t stop his heart from beating and he can’t stop his smile, either. He’s beaming ear to ear as you look at him in the garden, giving him all the light and hope that you’ve tried to give him from the start. He’s finally able to look you in the eyes and tell you that he loves you. He’d kiss you until he’s breathless, until you’re breathless, until the two of you are one, breathing in and breathing out each other’s life until you feel like you’re one person. He loves you, he loves you, he loves you, so truly.
Unknown is prone to doubt. He’d assume that you were in a place where you wanted to test your limits. Do you think he’ll treat you different as his assistant if you’re the kind of person that wants to use emotions to tip the scales? It’s very interesting to think about for him. He’d corner you where you stood, eyes baring into yours as he waited for you to repeat yourself, and then, he laughed, telling you that love is such a childish concept, and there is no love in this world. You’re merely obsessed with him, but don’t worry. He’s taken with you, and you’ll be with him no matter what.
SE Saeran is very... anxious when it comes to romance and his feelings most of all. He feels like he’s walking on eggshells and he has to avoid everything to be able to keep his heart... in fact. It’s already been broken hundreds of times, but you mean something to him and he’s scared of opening the box, so when you’ve confessed to him, he hesitates, likely apologizing and leaving you there with a comment that he’d answer you soon. It would take him time before he can come back to you and admit that he cares about you, too, he’s just... afraid of hurting you.
SE Ray is very... well... his biggest fear is that he’s taking away from Saeran’s life. He woke up after years of what felt like not existing in this reality with all of you. He doesn’t feel like he has the right to be there, because it hasn’t been his life in a long time. So, even more so than the canon Ray, this Ray is choking all of his tears down and trying to hide himself away. He wants to tell you he loves you dearly, too. But, he’s so afraid that loving you will be in some way getting in the way of Saeran being happy, so he’s got to work on that. Hold him while he cries, and accept that this takes time.
Grave [SE Suit Saeran] has come to care about you in his own way, but the problem is that he never verbally expresses it. He’s come a long way as he tries to make sense of his feelings for you, pulling your hair and teasing you with his games of debate. However, there’s been no obvious way to say that he cares for you beyond a friendship, maybe a few questionable things but... when you try to confront him to tell him your heart, he’d freeze up, demand for you to elaborate but then he tenses up, and leaves. Similar to Ray, he needs time before he can confront his feelings, be patient, he cares for you but he’s... afraid of hurting you.
Su-Jin is so happy that you’re his best friend. He has you and his big brother in his life, and that’s all he needs. He looks up to you and Saeyoung, because you are the grown-ups in his life that make him feel safe when he’s scared or overly anxious. So, the first time you ruffle his hair and tell him that you love him, he’s so happy! He loves you, too! You’re his favorite person in the world! You’re his other big sibling figure, so he immediately hugs you and chimes back with the same affection. He can be really shy about it sometimes, but he feels safe with his family now.
Gonna hug and simply squeeze him, butting my head against his shoulder like cats do to show affection, as one does <3
SE Ray is very... anxious. He doesn't seek people out, he does his best to disappear, and he will do anything to make sure that there is nothing that can go wrong. It's a lot for him to deal with, frankly, but he takes his very seriously. So, if you go out of your way to find him and speak to him, he's flustered. He won't stop you, but you can tell from.. the longer that you hold him... the more that he's warming up to your affection.
