#school is draining

mephone bore

-

Nilah and Karl falling asleep after a long day of work and school.

Its so close to the end of the school year and I cannot focus on it or even try at this point

Like I've got 4 class deadlines, 2 big presentations and 3 other deadlines + a oral exam which will determine if I can even finish the schoolyear and I've got to find an internship all in the next 4 weeks 🥲

Why in gods name did I choose to get another education when I've already finished one 😭

But I did get the minor that I really really wanted! so next year I'm gonna study creative storytelling!

“Febuwhump ask” = 90% rambling, 8% fiending for Heroic Betrayal Supervillain, 2% asking about febuwhump

Because literally when you replied to my Febuwhump question and I saw your response, I wasn’t in the best mood, so I was going to respond the next day and then I ended up binge-watching a show instead, and then before I knew it, it was Monday, and then school absolutely swamped me from the sidelines anddddd now I’m here: late. 

Anywayyyyyyy, this is your girly 💍 Again, sorry for responding late- Because I asked you something, and then you responded, and I didn’t reply back- 

Thoughhhhhh, thank you so so much for your reply to my ask! I really appreciate it, lol- 

Okay, this is what I typed out on Saturday, and was planning on continuing on Sunday (ahem, it is now Wednesday if you haven’t noticed 😅): 

To be honest I’m not in the best mood at the moment- but your reply helped brighten it up- so thank you for that.

It made me really really really happy to see you write such a lengthy response. Like, the thing with me is, I’ll get really riled up while I’m writing my lengthy asks to you and a few hours after I send it I’ll start feeling anxious and insecure thinking I might have overdone it?? And I, like, overthink it- (until you respond and then I’m like: I can finally breathe again!). I guess I just don't wanna come off as annoying- And I’m not just saying that to get, like, sympathy points, it’s honestly just how I feel loll- I have to remind myself that when you answer other people's asks you never seem to mind it and even match their vibe a lot of times. I just feel like I go too far at times, and I’m like: “I don’t wanna overstep, but I also don't know how to articulate what I want to say without writing to this excessive length-” It’s a problem for sure- Because sometimes I’ll send you an ask, and as I’m doing something, like, i sent you an ask in the morning a few days ago, and was doing the dishes, and as I was doing the dishes I came up with like 3 others things I could’ve included in the ask- I just feel like I have to get it all out, ya know? Idkkk, it makes me think I overdo it a lot lolll, and you must have the patience of a saint to put up with it, haha-

Like I said, I was in a sensitive mood when getting your response, so it really gave me my spark back when I read the hashtags first (for some reason I skipped to the bottom?) and saw you say sorry for the length of your reply and I was like: “Oh?” And kinda perked up a little bit and went to read from the top, and you really out did yourself. Because, listen LISTEN, regretfully, and I mean very REGRETFULLY, I almost like didn’t WANT to read your response?? Which is VERY uncharacteristic of me, but I kinda shut down when I’m in a sensitive mood, it’s like totally subconscious, so I was like: “I’m gonna see if the hashtags will tell me if this response is worth it” (I swear I never never never would think that way rationally, I swearrrrrrrrr I love your responses but it’s just those moods sometimes?? I swearrrrrrrrrrr, pleaseeee don’t take this to heart- I become very condescending when I’m sensitive- though I also wanna be honest with you so that’s why I’m confessing that to youu-).

BUT THEN, (YEAH wait just a moment!), it’s like my self-pride came crashing down when I read a few specific hashtags at the bottom of your response: “Sorry for the length of this reply” (Oh?? Is it lengthy-?) and “just the gender thing gets me every time” (I assumed that meant you were gonna talk about female whumpees lol- as I think I read the beginning of your Whumpuary no. 4 before scrolling down? And it talked about female whumpees for the first fav trope). Anyway, what really kinda hooked me was the “sorry for the length” which is just an automatic grab at my attention, cause like my brain was trying hard NOT to care, but a tiny part of it was intrigued also- And so I decided to read it.

And, as I was reading it, I actually calmed down and smiled a little by the end- So, like, if you take anything out of that little ramble of mine, just know you indirectly helped my mood- 

Unfortunately, I didn’t read your response with as much enthusiasm as before… the FIRST time. I wrote this part of the ask on Saturday, so I’m going to try again and reread your response tomorrow (Sunday), when I’m more upbeat- I just wanted to let you know you cheered me up a little- Since, listen, you already give me quality and quantity replies, but you like, REALLY outdid yourself this time- and I really appreciate it. Though, ofc, I always appreciate all your replies. Also, I’ll probably touch on this tomorrow, but of course I’m gonna read the indents/your rambles?????????? BECAUSE how much have I blabbered my mouth off to you this past week???? You’re completely, awesomely, fine????? (#rizz? #get it? #cause I called you fine? #sometimes I embarrass myself, like, is that possible? Self-embarrassing oneself? Because why do I inflict this humiliation on myself and others?) 

Actually! I’m offended 😤 (JK!!! 😅) I would never actively NOT read your beautiful writing, even if it is a ramble! Because, how come even your RAMBLES are beautifully written?? (#sometimes I’m too down bad for your writing)

(To be honest I started feeling motivated to answer you back, but I really think I should wait until tomorrow so I can keep you the best quality 👍)

OKAY, back to present time Wednesday, and right underneath here was supposed to be my response written on Sunday, but that didn’t quite happen- So, now the rest of this response is going to be written from Wednesday, and I’ll, like actually be responding to your response- Cause, I have more questions, if you can believe it. 

Okayyy, now, let’s get rocking and rolling this Wednesday afternoon. 

I just wanna say, I totally understand what you mean with female whumpees. Personally, I’ve always written female characters over male ones. Which is probably because I’m also, like, female myself, and resonate with female characters, and just idk how to write male characters lol- 

Sometimes, I wish female whumpees were boys sometimes though? Because listen, it feels like you can’t DO certain things with females that you can with males? Like, you can’t put your hands on a female's chest, but you can a males (even if it’s meant threateningly, not even sexually, like I don’t write sexual things, so it feels kinda limitative?? In a way?). Like it’d be more weird if a male villain shoved a female hero by her chest, then if that hero was a male, ya know? Or, I don’t feel TOO restricted with this, but sometimes it feels like males are written with more violence involved? Like they are naturally the bearers of violence and the ones who fight it, but I wanna write a female who can also be a bearer of violence and/or the one who is fighting violence too, ya know?? Idkkkk, but I get what you mean- 

Because I know I’m gonna be writing female whumpees, heroes, villains, and, honestly—female whumpers. It’s weird, because over the past two years I’ve transitioned to male whumpers to female whumpers. I think it’s a personal thing for me- But, it’s hard to go back to wanting to write males- like, romance has never been a big thing for me (as omg, there’s two things I can NOT write for the life of me, and that’s: poetry & romance– I just don’t know??? There’s a block in my head? I be like: “And they kissed. And then they pulled apart after a few seconds. And then they extracted each other from each other.” I just can’t 😭) Okay, so, I really do think I’m gonna be writing female whump- I know I should try with males though, because I still feel like they are more inherently roughed up than females, and it’s hard to go past that- for some reason, I don’t know why though?? Though, I DO love your male whumpers, your male whumpees, your female whumpees, your female whumpers, and OMG– I literally went FERAL when I read your Whumpuary 3 post- Omg Captain was 🔥🔥 hello?? my girly Captain slayed, because omg? Poor whumpee though 😞 Since, ya know, she’s, well, a she- And not a he- And is trapped on a male-dominant ship- Like, girly—run at this point. 

Also, I have NOT read the GONE series but guess who is adding it to their reading list 😃 —------------------------👉 ✨ me ✨

And I don’t care that you use the same five superpowers in every story, because you eat them up every time 👏👏👏👏 Because I feel like you always make them unique to their user. Like, Flynn, Karma, and Ambrose (I think I spelled that write??) all have, like, mind control as their power, but despite their powers being similar in their properties, they are still very different from one another? Flynn’s power seems more soothing/calming to me. And Karma commits horrendous acts against mankind with his, and while I’m not updated on IF, I remember Ambrose used his power, more so, to keep Kit inside the house and sorta compliant??? And he, like, messed with the poor boy's mind-? Overall, I just think you make each superpower so very creative, and so very crafted specifically with the user/villain in mind–?? Anyway, love all your villains with my whole heart and soul and being (FYI as I was writing this paragraph my space bar was throwing a tantrum and kept getting stuck every 5 words- so if this paragraph came out choppy it is because of my lack of patience with this broken key-)

(Don’t mind this: PLEASE publish a bookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!)

I am totally, 100% interested in writing! And I definitely plan on writing this year! I’ve been on the biggest writer’s block ever for a whole year now- And it’s so so so hard for me to remain consistent- Seeing you write Whumpuary kinda inspires me to write though! But at the same time I’m definitely detail-oriented and I have to plan a whole layout before writing something, but I DO plan on participating in Febuwhump. Actually! I have participated in Whumpuary, and that was in January 2024. Let’s just say… I kinda called it quits after the first 2 days- I had day 1 and day 2 combined and had written a VERY (typical of me) lengthy excerpt, and had the next few days planned out to write, but I quit? I don’t remember the reason, I MUST have lost motivation? I deleted my account also- Whumpuary reblogged it though so it’s literally still on Whumpuary’s blog but with a “deactivated account” label. I remember I was really excited to participate too lol- I like had it in the queue to post at exactly 12 AM on January 1- It’s too bad I gave it up, for whatever reason- I have a horrible curse for a lack of motivation, but I’m trying to work around that this year, because it’s really, like, limiting me?? 

I love Karmaaaaaaa, he’s suchhhhhhh a good villain- And omg, I’m sorry to ask this- I know who Karma is and I know who Felix is, but who is Nathan?? I’m sorryyyyy, if I’ve literally read the drabble or series with this character I will face the corner, but, literally, idk who nathan is 😭 And I wanna know who this “proper psycho” is before my mind starts going through your whole Master Post trying to find out-

I could never criticize your work! Actually, I’ve noticed you’ve really improved over the year! Like, you’ve always been good at writing (like, since I’ve found your writing, cause everyone used to start with baby steps lol), but you write so flawlessly now- it’s unreal sometimes how good your writing is, because, like, where’s my book? (I’m being so serious rn). I just wanna say the “...when my ego gets to the size of Russia and China combined…” was really funny to me, because I literally have a map of the world set up in my room— The target audience of that joke was definitely met- 

I will be awaiting your “very angry family members” with my arms open wide if it means I can continue to praise your work and grow your ego into greater masses 🫡 I am forever at your service 🦅

Now, as you can see school is definitely going to be the number one enemy (jk I have no enemies 👼) when it comes to being as active in my fangirling for you- Buttttt, I will not let it dismay me- or you ig?? I do wanna do better this school semester since Math and Science have almost had me starting my villain arc multiple times- Though, I’ll definitely make sure to save some time to write for Febuwhump. And I think I’m actually going to try going for a series rather than individual drabbles for the whump event- I might do some prompts as a part of a series, and some as drabbles- I'm not sure yet, lol- It's still in the planning phase.

Also, I know this is late and doesn't apply anymore! BUT, in your response to my ask, you had said “...And good luck if you try writing, and IF NOT, good luck with school on Monday I’m guessing?” And I want to pretend it’s Sunday rn and say: "OMG yessssss, I have school on Monday 😓- And thank youuuuuu"

Okay, now to my questions:

Do you literally have any tips for writing superpowers? And learning how to write superpowers in general? 

Are you still in school? Because, I THINK this was you (if it wasn’t, just like let me rot in my cage in silence), but I thought I read something of yours and the comments were congratulating you on getting your degree? I think it might’ve been in the IF series comment section? I’m really not sure, like at all. I could be thinking of the wrong thing- Because I can't remember for the life of me if that was you or someone else- Though, if you DID get a degree, what was it in? If you didn't? I'm already in my cage.

Are you doing drabbles (like with Whumpuary) or a series for Febuwhump?

Also, I saw you were looking for song suggestions for your whump-stimuli (the music that gets you going in your whump feels)- and I wish I could help with that! Because, literally, my, like, “whumpiest” songs would be: “forwards beckon rebound” by Adrianne Lenker and “romantic homicide” by d4vd 😭😭 So I can’t really help you with giving you a fresher playlist lol- My playlist is NOT best suited for such endeavors at all- sorryyy

You know, I truly never understand how my “asks” (it’s more me yapping than asking 😅) get to such great lengths. Though, I’m gonna be forced to tone them down because of school lol- 

I'm not gonna lie, I've already noticed that I'm already losing my flow to writing again, and literally just because I'm being drained- Though, I really really plan on not letting that stop me pursue actually writing this year, and to be absolutely honest, I hope to write something that YOU would enjoy reading, so I hope I can get to that place, and improve-

-From your girly 💍

PS. I actually don’t think I have any PS’-? #I must be devolving #it must be the workings of my now school environment #the assassins to my creativity #the vacuum to my energy #the rope to my wrists

ACTUALLY I JUST READ WHUMPUARY NO. 7 AND I’M IN LOVE OMG OMG—

I swear to god I am going to get these asks printed out one day and start scrap booking them ahahahahaha!!! I love the length, and do NOT stress about getting back to me!!!!! This is NOT an obligatory task!!! I am happy you sent one ask at all in the first place!!! So seriously, do not stress about replying to this AT ALL!!! Nevermind quickly enough!!! You are not obligated or expected to do anything other than — I was going to say read this — but not even that!!! If YOU DO read this, and smile a little, then that is enough for me!

I will answer the questions first and put my rambles on the bottom of the message, so that you can read them at your leisure and get your questions answered without having to look for the answers!!!