#schmicoadventcalendar2020

Nico frowns. He wants to say he doesn’t mind spending more. Especially because they’re Levi’s friends and Nico knows how important they are to the resident. But he doesn’t say anything, unsure if it’s something he’s even allowed to say in their current relationship status, so he just nods.

He’s almost at the door to the apartment building before Nico notices Levi’s not following him. He turns around and finds Levi staring back at him, brows furrowed. Like he’s trying to solve a particularly hard problem that’s on Nico’s face.

“What?” He asks and takes a step towards Levi.

Levi hums and shifts his hold on the presents. “This is our first Christmas together.”

It is. Last year, Nico had gone to see his family. This year — this dreadful year — he had assumed he’d be spending it alone with his cats. But Levi had asked him, saying he was part of their bubble anyways and Nico had accepted because he didn’t want to have yet another boring, lonely Christmas.

Levi still looks puzzled. So Nico asks, “Is that… okay?”

It's a moment before Levi answers, as the icy winter wind blows between them and the evening streetlights flicker on. Levi’s curly hair falls over his face, his eyes wide and green as he looks back at Nico.

Nico shivers, both from the cold and from the way Levi makes him feel: excitement, fondness, warmth. Like he always had. Nico misses that.

“It’s our first Christmas together,” Levi says again, now frowning too.

“Yes, it is,” Nico confirms and nods, trying to figure out what exactly Levi is trying to say. Now Levi just looks distressed as he hugs the load of presents closer to his chest and Nico doesn’t like that. He looks small and worried and afraid. Nico wants to know why. So he takes the three steps to close the distance between them.

“What’s wrong?” he says slowly, pushing away at the messy fringe on Levi’s forehead.

The resident closes his eyes and sighs, his head falling onto Nico’s shoulder.

Then, finally, a small muffled voice says, “I didn’t get you anything.”

Oh.

And Nico just starts laughing. It starts quiet but he’s quickly and quite unashamedly laughing and it’s loud. He can’t help it. A hundred and a thousand thoughts had run through his mind (Was Levi suddenly regretting inviting Nico? Was he going to demand that Nico leave? Did he not want his friends to know about them? Were they supposed to pretend that they weren’t sort of-kind of-maybe together again?) but none of them were what he thought Levi would say. It’s a relief, really.

Levi looks up, almost pouting and definitely mad that Nico’s laughing.

“Stop it! I’m serious. I totally forgot I should be giving you something. I was so focussed on finding that damn gay giraffe mug Taryn saw one time on Instagram and everything Casey wants could be bought at a Hot Topic so I just completely forgot.” Levi’s head falls back down in defeat against Nico’s chest. The sharp corner of one of the presents smooshed between them pokes at Nico’s hip. “Shit. I’m such a bad boyfrie—”

They both stop, hearing Levi’s words.

Nico thought he would’ve wanted to run if he heard that word again from Levi. It’s not something he lets himself think about. He didn’t even think they’d ever get to that point again. He had been ready to just — exist as they were, as stress relief, until the world went back to normal. He couldn’t even bear to think what would happen after either.

But now?

Nico can’t help but smile at the thought.

“Boyfriend, huh?” He sees Levi take a peek up at him, his cheeks bright red. He continues, “I see we both suck at it. Because I didn’t get you anything either.”

It’s a second before Levi starts laughing too and now they’re both laughing. Holding onto each other and realizing just how ridiculous this whole situation has been. They’ve been each other’s stress relief for months now. It started off as just sex, but then it turned into stress relief sleepovers because Jo’s apartment had no walls and Nico’s was closer to the hospital. Then it was stress relief dinners because eating alone at a restaurant sucks. Not to mention all the stress relief grocery shopping together or the stress relief car rides in the middle of the night that turned into stress relief cuddling after a long, hard day.

Somehow, between their break up, the pandemic, and all the using stress relief as an excuse, they had somehow, miraculously, learned how to be together again. And it was a better way of being together. One that knew its boundaries and one that was able to ask what the other wanted. And one that understood that when things just couldn’t be, it was still okay.

It really took a whole damn world-wide pandemic to bring Nico and Levi back together again.

And Nico really wants to kiss Levi just about now. He really does, he thinks, as he brings a hand up to hold Levi’s face. His skin is hot beneath Nico’s fingers and it warms Nico’s cold, freezing hand.

He really wants to kiss his boyfriend. So he does.

***

“What’s taking them so long?” Taryn asks, slouched over at the dinner table. There’s a whole ass ham in the middle that she had spent all afternoon covering up with pineapple and honey. And now it’s getting cold. “Are they making out? Tell me they’re not making out.”

Casey’s by the window, peering down at two figures outside. “They’re just hugging — oh, nevermind, now they’re kissing.”