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Crawley/Crowley was once a seraph. In Hebrew, the word saraph means "burning", and is used seven times throughout the text of the Hebrew Bible as a noun, usually to denote "serpent". Isaiah later uses the singular saraph to describe a "fiery flying serpent".
The text describes the "seraphim" as winged celestial beings with a fiery passion for doing God's good work.
Seraphim appear in the 2nd-century BC Book of Enoch, where they are mentioned, in conjunction with cherubim, as the heavenly creatures standing nearest to the throne of God. In non-biblical sources they are sometimes called the AkyÉst (Ge'ez: į įįįµįµ "serpents", "dragons"; an alternate term for Hell).
@spnsongchallengebingo square: "Killer Queen" by Queen
@raphael-spn-bingo square: Runaway
@spnfluffbingo square: Soulmate AU
Word Count: 3128
Rating: G
Pairing: SaRaph
Summary: Raphael Khan is never going to attend Stanford if they let their family force them into an arranged marriage after their graduation. Sam Winchester is never going to attend Stanford even with a full ride scholarship if he doesn't figure out additional financial aid in a hurry. Gabriel Kahn thinks he has the solution to both his cousin's and best friend's problems. It turns out to be even better than any of them thought.
Tags/Warnings: Genderqueer!Raphael, AFAB!Raphael, Soulmate AU, Unwanted Arranged Betrothal, Running Away To Marry A Stranger To Avoid Marrying A Stranger, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Naomi's A+ Parenting
Sam Winchester is Persephone and Raphael is Hades, but better. Take 1
Lucifer is Michaelās consort, and Michael is technically the ruler of heaven, IE: āZeusā. Raphael is running the underworld, Hell but not Hell. (Lucifer didnāt Fall, and Michael and Raphael make sure that souls destined for Hell actually deserve to be there, and that the punishment fits the crime.)
Sam, reincarnated anthropomorphic personification of Spring. Spring comes early when heās happy, flowers bloom at his feet when he laughs with genuine joy. Summer ends when heās upset.
John Winchester is physically abusive at the least. And heās decided that anything not very normal human deserves his wrath. Enter Sam.
Needlessly to say, dead flowers and bad bad winter weather follow the Winchesters across the US and back again. The kind of bad weather that draws attention. Not all of it human.
When Sam is 19, he decides heās going to Stanford. John gets pissed drunk, angry and violent and āif you leave donāt you come backā may cross his mouth, but thereās 10 feet of snow in a desert where it has never ever snowed. Cue the worst July of everyoneās life.
So Sam climbs out a window when he canāt take it anymore, and something innocent draws his attention a few miles away, and itās still snowing but it makes him laugh and thereās a few primroses blooming at his feet when Raphael finds him. (Snowstorm like this in a place like this one? There were a lot of deaths and Raphael decided to investigate and thereās the cute human unbothered by the snow of his upset, growing flowers at his feet. Raphael finds it endearing.)
Itās not kidnapping if Sam accepts the invitation. Also, heās technically an adult. Nobody who knows him views him as that, but itās not their call.
Sam enjoys the āunderworldā. Heās⦠not not happy, and his stay starts out like the first spring day, 55, sunny. Youāre not expecting it so it sneaks up on you. Raphael softly romances Sam. Small thoughtful gestures that make Sam happy, but slightly innocent and lacking in any pressure. āYou can stay as long as you want, even if weāre just friends.ā
Their relationship grows like spring turning into summer, and the āunderworldā is not unaffected. Flowers bloom when Sam laughs, and heās happy, genuinely happy. Raphael had a bit of a garden, a small one, and Sam tends it because he wants to and it flourishes as Raphael watches (and helps, getting right down in the dirt with him because Raphale wants to).
And then⦠And then Michael (and maybe Lucifer) come to visit Raphael. And Michael says that Sam has to spend some time on Earth or Spring wonāt ever come, and itās conveyed poorly and Sam greatly misunderstands. He thinks Michael is sending him home to John Winchester and freaks the fuck out. Hail in Hell and plants that wither to decay as soon as Samās tears hit them.
Sam knows what the pomegranate is. He eats it, because he wants to stay, and Raphael swore that Sam could stay. And maybe if he eats it, Michael canāt wrend him from the underworld.
Heās already married to Raphael by then, heās already eaten the pomegranate seeds thatāll bind them together until the end of the universe.
Thereās pomegranate juice dripping from his teeth and mouth and down his chin like blood when Raphael finds him kneeling somewhere in the garden, surrounded by decaying, rotting, plants. Heās fierce, and beautiful, and Raphael loves him. āMichael didnāt say you had to see any human you didnāt want to see, and Michael didnāt say you had to go alone. I wouldnāt stay even if he forbid me from leaving here. Which he didnāt. Humans describe home as being the people you love, right? You are my home. If you have to spend a few months on Earth every year so that humans can have their spring, then I will just have to find the most suitable vacation home for the one who rules beside me.ā
They spend more than the required length of time there every year because they deserve vacation, and itās almost as good as the castle in their kingdom.
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Cas raised Sam right and took him with him to confront Raphael. Raphael recognized Sam for what he is instead of what he's meant to be but isn't, they fell in love. Amara still got freed, as did Lucifer. Raphael died in the fight against Amara. When Jack starts dying because of the loss of his Grace, Sam prays to his beloved archangel to return from the Empty to heal him the way only Heaven's Healer could.
Does this fic have a title? It does not, (yet). Also, I wrote this with the intention of both Sam and Raphael as being asexual.
Word count: 3074
Rating: TPairings: SaRaph + Destiel
Sam was torn, as he stood beforeĀ the small cairn of stone in the backyard of the bunker. There was a much fresher memorial beside it, but he paid that one no mind.
He probably should have been inside, offering what little comfort he could to the bedridden and dying nephilim inside. But Jack was sleeping. And as he looked down as the paper in his hand, he knew he had to try. Jack was the closest thing to a son he'd had ever thought he could have, and he had to try this one last desperate measure. Especially if it meant sharing the child he considered to be his adopted son with the love of his life.
This was not the first time he had done this, read a letter to Raphael at the spot he has built the memorial to them. It wasn't a grave, not with Amara having imploded Raphael and leaving nothing behind to burn or bury. Knowing what he did now, Sam half hoped Raphael had been able to hear them, but also felt divided on whether or not he wanted to succeed at this. Did Raphael not deserve the peace they all craved? But he also knew that if he did manage to wake Raphael, the Healer would fix this, if they were able to. And maybe this could be the very last time they all tried to save the world. It was time to retire and raise the new generation of hunters and let them take over.
Sam didnāt need the white picket fence and the apple pie life, but he wanted his mate. The one who understood him better than anyone else ever had.
Amara had given Dean a āgiftā, but no one had ever asked him if there was anything he wanted or needed.
āDean Raphael,ā Sam said, hoping, praying. He had poured every ounce of his lover and hope into this letter. This prayer. āIf we had known Gabriel was alive all those years ago, I know you would have led the battle against the Prince of Hell and his legions of demons, I would have been there right by your side. I wish you had been here to dissuade him from yet more self sacrifice. You were the same way, I recall, and Iāve always been that way too, but we were good for each other. I also just wish I could have gotten to know the side of him you always talked about when you talked about your little brother, and I wish you could have seen him again. But I talked about Gabriel in my last letter and I have something a little more pressing to tell you now.
āIāve told you about your nephew, Jack Kline. He saved us from the apocalypse āverse Michael and helped us get out of apocalypse World. But thereās something wrong with him and heās dying. I wish you were here to heal him, and I wish you could have met him. Heās a sweet little kid for all that he looks like a young adult, and because weāve been raising him, I suppose I canāt help but think of his as kind of like my own son, and I do really wish I could share this with you. I know we never really talked about having our own kids, biological or otherwise, especially what with us still being firmly rooted in the hunter lifestyle. But Iām definitely ready to give that all up if I can just share this with you. Please.
"But you deserve your peace, too, and I hope that at the very least you are at peace. I just want you to know that only you will ever hold the keys to my heart, and I miss you so much.
"Please come back to me.ā
Sam took the matchbook from his pocket, and used it to set the letter on fire over the cairn, just as he had with all the other letters. He knew it probably affected nothing, meant nothing, but it mattered to him.
āPlease come back to me,ā he repeated, whispered, as his eyes watered. He didnāt want to lose any more of the people that he cared about. Not both the love of his life and the kid he would never stop wishing he could have raised with his mate.
Amara had obliterated Raphael near the beginning of that whole thing. Sheād gone straight for Heaven, intent on killing the first of Chuckās creations that she had so despised.
Neither she nor Chuck had offered any condolences for that. Theyād never said anything at all, with the possible exception of calling it āa most unfortunate tragedyā but he couldnāt really remember that conversation, as he had been too filled with anger and grief to really register it. They had just⦠left. Like nothing else mattered at all, and Dean hadnāt understood his grief either. No one had.
But you donāt share life altering love with another being for five years and then just let it go when they disappear from your life entirely.
āLook what I found!ā
The shout from a voice he wasnāt expecting to ever hear again in either life nor death had Sam turning around as he blinked past the tears falling down his face. Cocky Gabriel was standing there, cocky grin on his face, but as soon as Sam saw who he had brought with him, he had eyes for nothing else. The vessel was new, taller than he was, and more obviously androgynous, but besides that it seemed to be an almost perfect mix of their two last vessels. Sam hoped that meant Raphael was would be more comfortable in it than in their previous vessels, but Sam cared nothing about their physical appearance.
āRaph!ā he shouted running forward and wrapping around his mate. āYouāre here!ā
āI love you,ā Raphael whispered in Samās ear, as they returned Samās hug in the way best done by the taller person. There were reasons they had waited so long for Gabriel to help finish making them this perfect vessel. āIām here, and Iām not going anywhere.ā
āHey! What am I, chopped liver?ā
Sam glance over at Gabriel, but the younger archangel did not appear to actually be offended, as he was grinning happily at them.
āGabriel," Raphael scolded without looking at their brother. "I have not seen my mate in four years, let us have this moment.ā
āOkay, okay. But Iām pretty sure Sam mentioned a matter of timely importance.ā
āI would like to meet this child you want to be ours,ā Raphael agreed, but allowed Sam to pull away from the hug first. They didnāt not remain separated for long, as Sam took one of their hands a second later.
Sam studied the way Raphaelās hand fit snugly into his larger hand. He had missed this so much it still ached like a fresh wound. But Raphael was here before him and he almost couldnāt believe it.
āJackās inside,ā he said finally, and then led the way. Dean was nowhere to be seen when Sam led the two archangels into Jackās room. Castiel alone sat in the chair by the head of the bed.
Castiel looked up as they entered the room. āGabriel, Raphael. I am glad to see you both alive and well.ā
āWhere is Dean?ā Sam asked. He knew he had to reveal this to Dean sooner over later, but he was glad Dean was not in the room because he didnāt want any screaming matches to occur in Jackās bedroom.
āI sent him to the store,ā Castiel said, āto buy some random objects. It should keep him busy for the next two hours. I didnāt want him to cause a scene when there are more important things at stake.ā
Raphael nodded. āThank you. I would like to heal the child, if I might have a closer look? Can you tell me what you know about what happened?ā
āHeās dying from low grace levels,ā Castiel explained, standing so Raphael could take the seat he had been occupying. āHis organs are failing.ā
āLow grace levels isnāt usually fatal...Nephilim do have a higher chance of death from that, but only when⦠What did you do?ā
āWe tried to give him the remaining vial of Gabrielās grace we tracked down from a shaman. But Jack had a bad reaction to it,ā Sam explained. āThe low grace levels are from destroying the Michael in the alternate universe, and whatever heās been up lately.ā
āOf course he had a bad reaction to my grace!ā Gabriel shouted. He sighed, taking a moment to compose himself. āI ran with the pagans for a really long time. Long enough it made permanent alterations to the makeup of my grace. Think STDs, except for Grace. But it also means that it isnāt compatible with anyone elseās anymore, even those with whom it would have been compatible in the beginning.ā
āGrace has compatibilities?ā Sam asked.
Raphael put a hand on Jackās forehead. āItās a little bit like how human blood has rules for whose is compatible with who, with a few things such as Gabrielās experiences with the Pagan or Luciferās causes it to shift, but it also has natural rules it follows as well. In the beginning, each archangel had a different type, and all the ranks of angels that followed had one of those four. My grace is a bit like the universal donor, probably for cases like this. Thereās probably instances where it could be rejected, same for the incredibly rare human blood types such as hh, but Iāve never seen it happen.ā
āEven Luciferās?ā Castiel asked.
āJacksā grace is not identical to what Luciferās grace looked like in recent times. Thereās a small genetic component sure, possibly similar to Luciferās original grace type, which was not the universal recipient, but his own choices and actions are also apart of the equation. I would be shocked if my grace was rejected by the good kid Sam described to me the last two years.ā
Samās eyes widened. āYou heard my prayers?ā
āI heard all of your prayers addressed to me,ā Rapahel answered. āI was just unable to return before now, and I apologize for that.ā
Rapahelās eyes glowed the soft blue of grace being used and Jackās flew open, unseeing but filled with the same effect.
āDo you want a snack, Sam?ā Cas asked.
Sam didnāt register that Castiel was talking to him, too busy entranced by Raphaelās ethereal presence.
All too soon, the light faded and Jackās eyes closed. Raphael took an unsteady step backwards, but Sam was right there to support them. āAre you okay?ā Sam asked, and Castiel asked if Jack would be alright.
āIām fine, Sam. Itās just been awhile since Iāve done something like this. But I wouldnāt be opposed to retiring for the evening. Jack is also recovering. I imagine he will sleep until sometime this evening or tomorrow morning. Would you like to join me, Sam?ā
Sam nodded, and they walked hand in hand back to their shared room. The room looked untouched to Rapahel, as though no one had stepped into it since Amara had exploded him almost four years previously. There was also not a single spec of dust, thought it almost felt as if that had been a recent change, as there was a very faint feeling of lingering grace having performed the single act of freshening the space. But it was clear to him that Sam had not been sleeping in here. Not once.
āDo you want to change into something more comfortable?ā Sam asked. āWe might need to go shopping, but I think this will fit?ā
Raphael agreed about about getting some new clothing, their new vessel was taller and shaped differently than their previous ones. Gabriel had helped them finish it, but it had been an idea theyād contemplated even before Amara had imploded them.
Sam was holding a long silky sleep shirt that they had given to him, though heād only worn it a few times.
They had worn it more, back then. It wasnāt really Samās aesthetic, but there was just something pleasant about stealing clothing from Samās wardrobe.
This form was built more petite than Sam, still, just taller. They had mainly wanted something androgynous, so they could really feel like themself in this skin, but theyād kept Sam in mind too.Ā
They smiled at Sam. āI would like that.ā
There was a wicker laundry basket under the desk and Sam put his jeans and flannel into it, leaving his t-shirt and underwear on.
Raphael stripped, slowly so that they could show off this vessel to Sam, but not so slowly that it was a tease. Sam hummed appreciatively, but he did not seem interested in anything more than that.
āGabriel helped me make this vessel for me, do you like it?ā
Sam smiled and nodded. āAre you happy and comfortable in it?ā
āI like that it allows me the freedom to change what gender is present down there. Are you feeling up for a demonstration?ā
āMaybe some other time?ā Sam shook his head, but he was still smiling. He passed Raphael the sleep shirt. āWill you just hold me, tonight?ā
āOf course.ā
Together, they pulled the comforter back from the top of the bed so that they could crawl under the sheets and blankets.
Sam intended to fall asleep last, as he wanted to savor that he was lying next to his mate who he had missed so much, had longed for the return of. But he had not slept well in so long that it was impossible to say awake.
Raphael took longer to fall asleep.They were tired from the grace transfusion, but they did not really need sleep. Just to rest quietly.
The unaltered state of the room concerned them, because it felt like Sam had not moved on at all, had perhaps not had the opportunity to finish grieving.
Sam looked small tucked beside them. Weary, desperate. It did not suit him, and Raphael hoped their return could help ease him. They closed their eyes, letting Sam's presence soothe them in return. They had missed sleeping and waking up with their mate in their arms.
Samās cry woke Raphael sometime later. It seemed to have woken Sam as well, though Raphael noticed that Sam did not wake instantly as he used to.
Was that because they were here now and Samās subconscious remember he was safe? Had Sam broken the habit of waking instantly himself? Or was this something else entirely?Sam woke slowly in a tight embrace, tears falling down his face. Heād been having a nice dream about Raphael being back and he didnāt want to wake up for fear of it having been nothing more than a dream.
There was a gentle rumble next to him, followed by what had to be an Enochian lullaby and he blinked wearily at the figure holding him. āRaphael,ā he croaked hoarsely. āYou are here.ā
āIām right here, Beloved,ā Raphael swore. āRight where I belong.ā
Sam cried harder into Raphaelās shirt, fingers wrapping tightly around the hem of the fabric.
Raphael held Sam tighter and resumed singing the Enochian lullabies they had half forgotten. Sam did not seem settled enough to go back to sleep, but that did not mean that they were not going to soothe and comfort him to the best of their abilities.
Sam could not sleep and did not want to. He layed curled in Raphael's arms and let their voice ground him in the present and reassure him that this was very real and that everything would be okay.
Raphael was sure that Sam was almost ready to fall asleep unintentionally a while later, but that was right when their bedroom door opened quietly.
Gabriel stood in the dark corridor, a platter in his hands. Besides him, Jack was gripping Gabriel's shirt. Raphael was unable to tell whether that was because Jack was unsteady on his feet, or simply terrified.
"I brought some grilled cheeses," Gabriel said. "I thought you lovebirds might like some nourishment."
Sam blushed crimson and tried to hide under Raphael and the blankets. Raphael laughed because it was nice to see Sam embarrassed rather than so afraid of losing them again.
"Uh huh," Raphael said. "Sam? Do you think you can eat some sandwiches?" Even if Sam said no, they intended to see if they could get him to eat a little. Sam looked more gaunt than they remembered him being and they had both missed the reasonable dinner hour by sleeping it away.
Sam shrugged, which Raphael was going to take. "Looks like we could eat those sandwiches."
"I also brought Jack. He got lost looking for you guys so I got him to help me make these."
That got Sam's attention and he sat up. "I'd love a sandwich. Jack, do you want to come lie down up here? There's plenty of room for all of us. You were sleeping, but my mate, Raphael, here, saved your life."
Ā Gabriel handed the tray to Jack and Jack brought it over to Sam. "You did?" he asked, addressing Raphael.
"I did. I've heard a lot about you from Sam, but circumstances prevented me from coming sooner. I'm really glad to meet you now though. Are you feeling better? I don't think you'll be completely well for a few days, but you should be fine with a few days of rest and low energy activities. No smiting anything."
"I'm okay, thank you."
Sam took the tray from Jack as Gabriel shut the door as he left. "Why don't you climb up here between us? It's nice and warm up here."
Jack considered the instruction for a moment, then followed the directions, scrambling over Sam and into the space between them.
"I was just singing some Enochian lullabies for Sam, would you like to hear them too?" Raphael asked as they tucked Jack under the covers.
Jack nodded, so Raphael resumed their singing and Sam held their hand behind Jack's head as he leaned against the headboard eating the sandwiches.
Raphael banished the tray to the kitchen when Sam had eaten his fill, and they smiled as Sam curled up protectively behind Jack and followed the child's lead at returning to sleep.
This was the "Heaven" they had all been waiting for.
Sam was torn, as he stood beforeĀ the small cairn of stone in the backyard of the bunker. There was a much fresher memorial beside it, but he paid that one no mind.
He probably should have been inside, offering what little comfort he could to the bedridden and dying nephilim inside. But Jack was sleeping. And as he looked down as the paper in his hand, he knew he had to try. Jack was the closest thing to a son he'd had ever thought he could have, and he had to try this one last desperate measure. Especially if it meant sharing the child he considered to be his adopted son with the love of his life.
This was not the first time he had done this, read a letter to Raphael at the spot he has built the memorial to them. It wasn't a grave, not with Amara having imploded Raphael and leaving nothing behind to burn or bury. Knowing what he did now, Sam half hoped Raphael had been able to hear them, but also felt divided on whether or not he wanted to succeed at this. Did Raphael not deserve the peace they all craved? But he also knew that if he did manage to wake Raphael, the Healer would fix this, if they were able to. And maybe this could be the very last time they all tried to save the world. It was time to retire and raise the new generation of hunters and let them take over.
Sam didnāt need the white picket fence and the apple pie life, but he wanted his mate. The one who understood him better than anyone else ever had.
Amara had given Dean a āgiftā, but no one had ever asked him if there was anything he wanted or needed.
āDean Raphael,ā Sam said, hoping, praying. He had poured every ounce of his lover and hope into this letter. This prayer. āIf we had known Gabriel was alive all those years ago, I know you would have led the battle against the Prince of Hell and his legions of demons, I would have been there right by your side. I wish you had been here to dissuade him from yet more self sacrifice. You were the same way, I recall, and Iāve always been that way too, but we were good for each other. I also just wish I could have gotten to know the side of him you always talked about when you talked about your little brother, and I wish you could have seen him again. But I talked about Gabriel in my last letter and I have something a little more pressing to tell you now.
āIāve told you about your nephew, Jack Kline. He saved us from the apocalypse āverse Michael and helped us get out of apocalypse World. But thereās something wrong with him and heās dying. I wish you were here to heal him, and I wish you could have met him. Heās a sweet little kid for all that he looks like a young adult, and because weāve been raising him, I suppose I canāt help but think of his as kind of like my own son, and I do really wish I could share this with you. I know we never really talked about having our own kids, biological or otherwise, especially what with us still being firmly rooted in the hunter lifestyle. But Iām definitely ready to give that all up if I can just share this with you. Please.
"But you deserve your peace, too, and I hope that at the very least you are at peace. I just want you to know that only you will ever hold the keys to my heart, and I miss you so much.
"Please come back to me.ā
Sam took the matchbook from his pocket, and used it to set the letter on fire over the cairn, just as he had with all the other letters. He knew it probably affected nothing, meant nothing, but it mattered to him.
āPlease come back to me,ā he repeated, whispered, as his eyes watered. He didnāt want to lose any more of the people that he cared about. Not both the love of his life and the kid he would never stop wishing he could have raised with his mate.
Amara had obliterated Raphael near the beginning of that whole thing. Sheād gone straight for Heaven, intent on killing the first of Chuckās creations that she had so despised.
Neither she nor Chuck had offered any condolences for that. Theyād never said anything at all, with the possible exception of calling it āa most unfortunate tragedyā but he couldnāt really remember that conversation, as he had been too filled with anger and grief to really register it. They had just⦠left. Like nothing else mattered at all, and Dean hadnāt understood his grief either. No one had.
But you donāt share life altering love with another being for five years and then just let it go when they disappear from your life entirely.
āLook what I found!ā
The shout from a voice he wasnāt expecting to ever hear again in either life nor death had Sam turning around as he blinked past the tears falling down his face. Cocky Gabriel was standing there, cocky grin on his face, but as soon as Sam saw who he had brought with him, he had eyes for nothing else. The vessel was new, taller than he was, and more obviously androgynous, but besides that it seemed to be an almost perfect mix of their two last vessels. Sam hoped that meant Raphael was would be more comfortable in it than in their previous vessels, but Sam cared nothing about their physical appearance.
āRaph!ā he shouted running forward and wrapping around his mate. āYouāre here!ā
āI love you,ā Raphael whispered in Samās ear, as they returned Samās hug in the way best done by the taller person. There were reasons they had waited so long for Gabriel to help finish making them this perfect vessel. āIām here, and Iām not going anywhere.ā
āHey! What am I, chopped liver?ā
Sam glance over at Gabriel, but the younger archangel did not appear to actually be offended, as he was grinning happily at them.
āGabriel," Raphael scolded without looking at their brother. "I have not seen my mate in four years, let us have this moment.ā
āOkay, okay. But Iām pretty sure Sam mentioned a matter of timely importance.ā
āI would like to meet this child you want to be ours,ā Raphael agreed, but allowed Sam to pull away from the hug first. They didnāt not remain separated for long, as Sam took one of their hands a second later.
Sam studied the way Raphaelās hand fit snugly into his larger hand. He had missed this so much it still ached like a fresh wound. But Raphael was here before him and he almost couldnāt believe it.
āJackās inside,ā he said finally, and then led the way. Dean was nowhere to be seen when Sam led the two archangels into Jackās room. Castiel alone sat in the chair by the head of the bed.
Castiel looked up as they entered the room. āGabriel, Raphael. I am glad to see you both alive and well.ā
āWhere is Dean?ā Sam asked. He knew he had to reveal this to Dean sooner over later, but he was glad Dean was not in the room because he didnāt want any screaming matches to occur in Jackās bedroom.
āI sent him to the store,ā Castiel said, āto buy some random objects. It should keep him busy for the next two hours. I didnāt want him to cause a scene when there are more important things at stake.ā
Raphael nodded. āThank you. I would like to heal the child, if I might have a closer look? Can you tell me what you know about what happened?ā
āHeās dying from low grace levels,ā Castiel explained, standing so Raphael could take the seat he had been occupying. āHis organs are failing.ā
āLow grace levels isnāt usually fatal...Nephilim do have a higher chance of death from that, but only when⦠What did you do?ā
āWe tried to give him the remaining vial of Gabrielās grace we tracked down from a shaman. But Jack had a bad reaction to it,ā Sam explained. āThe low grace levels are from destroying the Michael in the alternate universe, and whatever heās been up lately.ā
āOf course he had a bad reaction to my grace!ā Gabriel shouted. He sighed, taking a moment to compose himself. āI ran with the pagans for a really long time. Long enough it made permanent alterations to the makeup of my grace. Think STDs, except for Grace. But it also means that it isnāt compatible with anyone elseās anymore, even those with whom it would have been compatible in the beginning.ā
āGrace has compatibilities?ā Sam asked.
Raphael put a hand on Jackās forehead. āItās a little bit like how human blood has rules for whose is compatible with who, with a few things such as Gabrielās experiences with the Pagan or Luciferās causes it to shift, but it also has natural rules it follows as well. In the beginning, each archangel had a different type, and all the ranks of angels that followed had one of those four. My grace is a bit like the universal donor, probably for cases like this. Thereās probably instances where it could be rejected, same for the incredibly rare human blood types such as hh, but Iāve never seen it happen.ā
āEven Luciferās?ā Castiel asked.
āJacksā grace is not identical to what Luciferās grace looked like in recent times. Thereās a small genetic component sure, possibly similar to Luciferās original grace type, which was not the universal recipient, but his own choices and actions are also apart of the equation. I would be shocked if my grace was rejected by the good kid Sam described to me the last two years.ā
Samās eyes widened. āYou heard my prayers?ā
āI heard all of your prayers addressed to me,ā Raphael answered. āI was just unable to return before now, and I apologize for that.ā
Rapahelās eyes glowed the soft blue of grace being used and Jackās flew open, unseeing but filled with the same effect.
āDo you want a snack, Sam?ā Cas asked.
Sam didnāt register that Castiel was talking to him, too busy entranced by Raphaelās ethereal presence.
All too soon, the light faded and Jackās eyes closed. Raphael took an unsteady step backwards, but Sam was right there to support them. āAre you okay?ā Sam asked, and Castiel asked if Jack would be alright.
āIām fine, Sam. Itās just been awhile since Iāve done something like this. But I wouldnāt be opposed to retiring for the evening. Jack is also recovering. I imagine he will sleep until sometime this evening or tomorrow morning. Would you like to join me, Sam?ā
Sam nodded, and they walked hand in hand back to their shared room. The room looked untouched to Rapahel, as though no one had stepped into it since Amara had exploded him almost four years previously. There was also not a single spec of dust, thought it almost felt as if that had been a recent change, as there was a very faint feeling of lingering grace having performed the single act of freshening the space. But it was clear to him that Sam had not been sleeping in here. Not once.
āDo you want to change into something more comfortable?ā Sam asked. āWe might need to go shopping, but I think this will fit?ā
Raphael agreed about about getting some new clothing, their new vessel was taller and shaped differently than their previous ones. Gabriel had helped them finish it, but it had been an idea theyād contemplated even before Amara had imploded them.
Sam was holding a long silky sleep shirt that they had given to him, though heād only worn it a few times.
They had worn it more, back then. It wasnāt really Samās aesthetic, but there was just something pleasant about stealing clothing from Samās wardrobe.
This form was built more petite than Sam, still, just taller. They had mainly wanted something androgynous, so they could really feel like themself in this skin, but theyād kept Sam in mind too.Ā
They smiled at Sam. āI would like that.ā
There was a wicker laundry basket under the desk and Sam put his jeans and flannel into it, leaving his t-shirt and underwear on.
Raphael stripped, slowly so that they could show off this vessel to Sam, but not so slowly that it was a tease. Sam hummed appreciatively, but he did not seem interested in anything more than that.
āGabriel helped me make this vessel for me, do you like it?ā
Sam smiled and nodded. āAre you happy and comfortable in it?ā
āI like that it allows me the freedom to change what gender is present down there. Are you feeling up for a demonstration?ā
āMaybe some other time?ā Sam shook his head, but he was still smiling. He passed Raphael the sleep shirt. āWill you just hold me, tonight?ā
āOf course.ā
Together, they pulled the comforter back from the top of the bed so that they could crawl under the sheets and blankets.
Sam intended to fall asleep last, as he wanted to savor that he was lying next to his mate who he had missed so much, had longed for the return of. But he had not slept well in so long that it was impossible to say awake.
Raphael took longer to fall asleep.They were tired from the grace transfusion, but they did not really need sleep. Just to rest quietly.
The unaltered state of the room concerned them, because it felt like Sam had not moved on at all, had perhaps not had the opportunity to finish grieving.
Sam looked small tucked beside them. Weary, desperate. It did not suit him, and Raphael hoped their return could help ease him. They closed their eyes, letting Sam's presence soothe them in return. They had missed sleeping and waking up with their mate in their arms.
Samās cry woke Raphael sometime later. It seemed to have woken Sam as well, though Raphael noticed that Sam did not wake instantly as he used to.
Was that because they were here now and Samās subconscious remember he was safe? Had Sam broken the habit of waking instantly himself? Or was this something else entirely?Sam woke slowly in a tight embrace, tears falling down his face. Heād been having a nice dream about Raphael being back and he didnāt want to wake up for fear of it having been nothing more than a dream.
There was a gentle rumble next to him, followed by what had to be an Enochian lullaby and he blinked wearily at the figure holding him. āRaphael,ā he croaked hoarsely. āYou are here.ā
āIām right here, Beloved,ā Raphael swore. āRight where I belong.ā
Sam cried harder into Raphaelās shirt, fingers wrapping tightly around the hem of the fabric.
Raphael held Sam tighter and resumed singing the Enochian lullabies they had half forgotten. Sam did not seem settled enough to go back to sleep, but that did not mean that they were not going to soothe and comfort him to the best of their abilities.
Sam could not sleep and did not want to. He layed curled in Raphael's arms and let their voice ground him in the present and reassure him that this was very real and that everything would be okay.
Raphael was sure that Sam was almost ready to fall asleep unintentionally a while later, but that was right when their bedroom door opened quietly.
Gabriel stood in the dark corridor, a platter in his hands. Besides him, Jack was gripping Gabriel's shirt. Raphael was unable to tell whether that was because Jack was unsteady on his feet, or simply terrified.
"I brought some grilled cheeses," Gabriel said. "I thought you lovebirds might like some nourishment."
Sam blushed crimson and tried to hide under Raphael and the blankets. Raphael laughed because it was nice to see Sam embarrassed rather than so afraid of losing them again.
"Uh huh," Raphael said. "Sam? Do you think you can eat some sandwiches?" Even if Sam said no, they intended to see if they could get him to eat a little. Sam looked more gaunt than they remembered him being and they had both missed the reasonable dinner hour by sleeping it away.
Sam shrugged, which Raphael was going to take. "Looks like we could eat those sandwiches."
"I also brought Jack. He got lost looking for you guys so I got him to help me make these."
That got Sam's attention and he sat up. "I'd love a sandwich. Jack, do you want to come lie down up here? There's plenty of room for all of us. You were sleeping, but my mate, Raphael, here, saved your life."
Ā Gabriel handed the tray to Jack and Jack brought it over to Sam. "You did?" he asked, addressing Raphael.
"I did. I've heard a lot about you from Sam, but circumstances prevented me from coming sooner. I'm really glad to meet you now though. Are you feeling better? I don't think you'll be completely well for a few days, but you should be fine with a few days of rest and low energy activities. No smiting anything."
"I'm okay, thank you."
Sam took the tray from Jack as Gabriel shut the door as he left. "Why don't you climb up here between us? It's nice and warm up here."
Jack considered the instruction for a moment, then followed the directions, scrambling over Sam and into the space between them.
"I was just singing some Enochian lullabies for Sam, would you like to hear them too?" Raphael asked as they tucked Jack under the covers.
Jack nodded, so Raphael resumed their singing and Sam held their hand behind Jack's head as he leaned against the headboard eating the sandwiches.
Raphael banished the tray to the kitchen when Sam had eaten his fill, and they smiled as Sam curled up protectively behind Jack and followed the child's lead at returning to sleep.
This was the "Heaven" they had all been waiting for.
Oooooooh, random prompt! Okay, let's see how this works~
AFTERNOON SUNLIGHT FILTERED through the slats in the blinds that covered the kitchen window by the time Sam heard his spouse arriving home. He was already smiling when he turned even as he scanned the trim figure in the dark suit. Raphael always woke and prepared for the day well before Sam was able to drag himself out of bed, so he used the opportunity to check for visual cues to how his mate was identifying today. Hair straight but left loose, make-up, pencil skirt and low heels... Sam reached his wife and wrapped his arms around her.
"Welcome home, love. Long day?" he asked as he felt the tension in her frame that slowly relaxed as her arms came up to return the embrace.
"That's one way of putting it," the low and much-loved voice murmured. "Sometimes I don't know if my subordinates have the sense given a lemming between the lot of them."
"That's probably a universal concern," Sam joked, and felt a thrill of pleasure at the soft chuckle that vibrated against his chest. Raphael laughed so rarely that it was always a good thing when he managed to amuse his mate. "But you got the problem sorted?"
"It's an... on-going process," his wife temporized. "But there's nothing I can do about it from my office, so I came here."
"Do you have to go out again soon?" Sam asked, tamping down on the disappointment. "If you're this stressed out about whatever it is, you could probably do with a break."
"Did you have something in mind?" Raphael asked, tilting her head back to look up at Sam, more curious than sultry. Cuddles it was.
"Dinner's going to be a little while longer, but I don't have to stand over it right now," he said, guiding her over to the couch and gently helping her out of her suit jacket, laying the garment across the back where it wouldn't wrinkle. "Sit with me a bit? Let's see if I can work some of those knots out of your shoulders."
"Alright," Raphael acquiesced, sitting on the couch and turning her back to Sam. She sat stiffly, as she always did at first, but as Sam put his large hands and all the skills his old soccer coach had instilled in him to work, she relaxed further, leaning back into his touch and sighing. "Your hands are very strong...."
"So you keep telling me," Sam teased gently, focusing on one particularly tense knot just inside her left shoulderblade. "There are some days I'm convinced you married me so you'd have access to my hands whenever you want."
"And what reason did you marry me, I wonder?" Raphael wondered, her voice soft enough that Sam could tell she hadn't meant for him to hear. He still paused in his massage and wrapped his arms around her, holding her against his chest as he kissed her hair.
"I married you because of your compassion, your determination, your patience and that fire inside you that keeps you going even when the world seems to test you more than usual," he murmured. "I married you because every day is a new surprise and a new adventure with you, and because I know that if we're together we can face anything. I married you, Raphael Dynastes, because I love you."
"I..." Raphael's breath hitched in her chest, and she turned in his embrace to lean against him. "I don't know if I deserve your love, Sam...."
"Deserving or not, it's mine to give," Sam told her, tightening his embrace when his words made her sob. "Raphael, love, what's wrong?"
"Nothing... everything... Sam, I'm sorry... I'm so sorry...."
"Raphael?"
"Sam," she swallowed and pulled back, and Sam's concern ratcheted up a notch at the tears on her cheeks. "How long has it been since you last saw your brother?"
"My... brother?" Sam blinked and frowned, casting his mind back to try and recall. "Not since we were kids and he aged out of the system ahead of me. Why?"
"Because that's not true," came the shocking answer. Sam stared into Raphael's too-bright eyes as she continued, "You last saw your brother a week ago, right before you were abducted. Your name is Sam Winchester... and I am the Archangel Raphael."