#samdaharu

Whitestone has a cultural tradition of women keeping their hair long until marriage or another significant life change. (Persy has complicated feelings about cutting hers)

Keyleth and Persy's friendship is a bit more contentious than in canon - Persy remembers being just like Keyleth and it makes her Uncomfy.

Persy is perhaps a bit jealous of Vex's easy sudden friendship with Zahra. She's not had many female friends before and so she's a bit possessive of her one with Vex. (Later, she realises it's a bit more than friendship going on there.)

Ripley is weirdly almost jealous? of Persy in this AU, because Persy is a woman allowed her interest in science (at least as far as Ripley can see) and that makes her treatment and torture of her so much worse.

Remember point one? Vex encourages Persy to grow out her hair after she joins VM. When they get together they have a lot of non-sexual intimacy that comes just from tending each other's hair.

48: dancing with each other

Vex has always hated dancing.

Well. That's a lie. When she was a child she loved it. On festival days in Byroden she and Vax and all the other children would dance silly, childish dances to whatever music was being played - dancing around in circles, or skipping, and mostly getting underfoot of the adults who were dancing properly if no less lively.

They were never really told to stop, only taught the steps if they wanted to learn properly and it was fun which is the only reason Vex really remembers ever liking dancing, a sole exception to her otherwise-universal hatred of most everything, dancing included, that she learned at Syngorn.

The worst thing, she thinks, is that most of the things she learned at Syngorn weren't even the lessons they were taught. She learned Elvish and Draconic and Abyssal, she learned archery and proper bow maintenance, and fletching and tracking, but those are all relatively straightforward things, really, when it comes right down to it.

No one talks about the lessons of keeping your mouth shut because the son of Syldor's colleague is mouthing off about her clumsy human blood as they dance a waltz and she's got at least three more dances left before she can escape.

No one talks about the lessons of hide your accent, hide any hint of the soft twang they'd learned from their mother because if you don't you'll be mocked for sounding like an othlir hick.

No one talks about the lessons of play nice because then they don't think you're a serious threat, of hide your hurts because every time you let them see they'll just hit you there again, of become as dextrous as you can with hands and feet so they can't fault you, of be the best because you have to do three times as well as your classmates to be given even the least remark as to your success.

No one talks about those. Syldor thinks they made them strong.

So Vex hates dancing. Oh, she can dance - better than most people she knows, elvish or otherwise, because when you learn how to keep a neutral face while an utter racist spews shit in your direction and keep perfect time, any dancing without that first hurdle is suddenly drastically easier.

But there's a wistful look on Percy's face as he looks at the growing crowd of dancers in the square. The music is - she thinks it's a spin on an old Winter's Crest ballad, which makes sense given the time of year, and the Tradesmeet square is full of people and stalls and noise, but the music rises over all of it, bright and beautiful.

They still don't know Percy terribly well, to be honest. He keeps to himself so much, private as anything, and she knows better than to pry when someone so carefully maintains such a distance. She does it herself, after all, if less... obviously.

(That was another lesson she'd learned. Don't be obvious that you hide something. Be obvious, be open, flirt and smile and tease and joke and don't let them see your hurts. Don't let them see that there's anything to see beyond what you show them, let them think they see everything. Let them think you shallow; don't let them think they have cause to pry. )

Later she'll attribute it to how the song changes - she knows this tune, it was something played back in Byroden and it sends a strong pang of wistful nostalgia through her - but in the moment she's at least aware it's also because she doesn't think she's ever seen Percy quite so obviously affected before.

"Hey," she says. "Fancy a dance?"

There's a crease in his brow, as though he expects her words to be a joke, but she's heard his accent, if he doesn't know how to dance - well, probably not to folk songs like this but dancing is dancing and if he has any sense of rhythm he'll probably be fine - well she'll eat a hairbrush's worth of Trinket's brushed out hair. She doesn't look away.

"It's fun," she points out. "Tis the season and all."

"It is indeed," he agrees, and offers her his hand. "I'd be delighted to accept."

She was right. He can dance.

Even better, he doesn't spew utter bullshit at her as they dance. For the first time since she was a child, Vex dances and has fun.

Put “📓” or some other version of a book emoji into my inbox and I’ll explain the plot of a fanfiction that I haven’t written but daydream about.

From what I see of CR fandom there's ... well frankly, not a lot of thoughts about Cassandra de Rolo, which is a shame because she's fascinating, but there seem to be a few specific trends for her. Some people want to give her a chance to be awesome and adventure on her own, which fine, I kind of get but also I think after the five years she had she'd want to unwind and relax and be safe more than a lot of things. Even when dealing with anger and all (with Percy's help, given some of the Wrap Up comments) I don't think that's necessarily the route she'd go. The other trends I see for her are often specifically romantic - and there's two trends I see there. People who ship her with Kynan, due to some of the Wrap Up comments from Matt, and people who ship her with Kaylie for... I don't know what reason. Some combo of Lesbians and, from what I could tell "it'd piss off Percy and that'd be funny" which I don't necessarily believe and certainly do not find encouraging ship motivation.

Sufficeth to say, I do not find either of these particularly compelling.

I've written a small fic about Cass before (here) and one day I'd like to write something that builds on it. Specifically, I want to explore how she might interact with Desmond.

No, not the mapmaker, that's Tyriok.

No, not the person they saved outside of Westruun from the orcs.

No. No. No.

The carriageboy Percy maimed.

Yeah. Him.

See, there's a few things I think that have the potential to make that interesting. Firstly, we're told Desmond is around 18 - which is to say, older than Kynan, around the same age as Cass, and likely around the same age Percy was when the Briarwoods attacked.

(Percy's last words to Desmond before knocking him out, "I want you spend the rest of your life making up for what you allowed to happen", suddenly take on a whole load of other meaning when you consider that, imo.)

He's a Whitestone native, he's not an inherently bad person. Percy attempts to apologise once they return, but gets repeatedly spoken over because he pauses, presumably trying to find the right words to apologise ("I'm sorry I maimed you, I was not entirely myself and may have been under the influence of a demon but that's no excuse and I do not know that I can ever make amends to you for the wrong I have done you" is not an apology that's likely to fall easily from anyone's lips, let us be honest here). He does ultimately try to ensure Desmond gets a position of work - which he may otherwise struggle to find, given his maimed hand, and again, which it is only fair Percy attempt to rectify given his responsibility.

But ah, this is all Desmond and Percy, let me move on to Desmond and Cassandra.

They're of an age. They also both lived through the Briarwoods occupation in pretty close proximity to the Briarwoods - Cassandra as their prisoner and Desmond first as the carriageboy of one of their new nobles and then as their carriageboy. They've seen both the Briarwoods capability for kindness, for protective anger, and for their cruelty and brutality - including towards them. They murdered Cassandra's family; when she helped Percy escape they were shot at and she was shot down under their orders. They abandoned Desmond when Vox Machina attacked; on realising he was their prisoner they sent two invisible stalkers to kill him.

They also were twistedly parental to Cassandra and saved Desmond from Tylieri's treatment. These two undoubtedly have complicated, messy and often unclear thoughts and emotions regarding the Briarwoods. Desmond was offered a job as a courier between Whitestone and Emon but after Musician's Nostalgia he's never heard from again. He may have been killed during the Conclave's attack, if he was still in Emon - or he may have been sent off already. The wiki assumes he lives; we don't know for certain. But I like the idea he lives and I like this specific idea, so I run with the assumption he survived and either made his way to Whitestone or was part of the refugees VM evacuated to Whitestone.

And I like the idea that he ends up in service to Cass, basically as her manservant and personal assistant. Percy wants to see Desmond employed. Cassandra is being left in charge of Whitestone and all the things Percy, in his particular messy way, is not good at dealing with, which is to say the aftermath of so much of what he does.

So Cassandra, partially perhaps as a pointed comment, keeping Desmond as her personal servant - so Percy cannot forget what he has done and what he has left her to deal with.

I do not think Desmond would ever think particularly kindly of Percy. I do not blame him. No matter how much I love Percy as a character and think him well constructed and find him fascinating to explore - I would not blame Desmond in the least for being bitter and angry regarding the man who maimed him, never apologised, ensured he was given employment and just left the handling of that to his deeply traumatised younger sister.

There are many legitimate reasons to criticise Percy and Desmond, in this circumstance even more than canon, would have every cause to see those.

But I also think he'd have a lot of reasons to empathise with and understand Cassandra. I think their understanding of the complexity of their personal relationships with the Briarwoods would make them less judgemental of one another's difficult decisions during the occupation; their understanding of the pressures of the occupation and the grief Whitestone and the families within it bear for what happened - they lived in and amongst it as Percy did not.

I think they could connect on an interesting and deep way.

I also think neither is particularly prone to trusting, given everything. I think they'd take a damn long time to admit their trust for each other let alone anything else. If I wrote it, it would be a painfully slow burn.

But... I like to imagine it. I like to think up how they'd slowly be drawn closer just by working together and seeing each other every day and understanding one another's quirks. I like to think about the steady, quiet peace they build because neither has much care for sudden loud noises or explosive anger. For how their understanding of one another builds reassurance; for how that means they stand firm for each other in tentative friendship and empathetic loyalty. I like to think about the way they act towards each other, starting as the formal standard of ruling Lady and personal manservant and how that shifts as they use that to shield one another from things they know they dislike; Desmond given leave when Percy comes to speak to Cassandra, Desmond interrupting with some small important distraction when Cassandra gets caught in panic or anxiety or a memory. Quietly, persistently, helping each other, and it seeming only as work.

But it's too persistent for just work. It's too consistent for work.

But of course - they cannot just admit it. They have little reason to trust, for all they very clearly trust each other within their set dynamic.

This story, if I ever wrote it, would unfold slowly, small thing weighing upon small thing until the pressure is insurmountable and impossible to ignore.

Of course you went for the musical headcanon :P

Percy we know can dance, but I think he remembers songs to dance to more by the meter and the motions than by any specific tune.

4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral?

I don't think I really have one word that does that? Like, no single word. So much of a word's impact is tied up in context - I know it's kind of a meme at this point but I cannit overstate the importance of a - and let me be clear here properly placed "oh" in a story.

The placement and use of a word matters, in my opinion, as much if not more than the word itself. Yes sussurrus has a lovely sound and malignant sounds evil and there's something lovely about the clipped abruptness of quick, careful movements - but the power comes from the context in which they're used. malignantin the wrong place just sounds overblown, sussurrus in the wrong place is incomprehensible and quick, careful movements is a sequence.

You see my point? Any word can make you go feral if it's used just right in it's context.

10. - Answered Here.

34. Thoughts on the Oxford comma, Go:

Good and useful but probably contributes to my insane overuse of commas in fic (I'm so sorry beta-readers, I know you're left picking commas out of your teeth for weeks afterwards).

It's so sudden and visceral. She's there one moment, then dead the next and you're left in shock just as Percy is for much the same and for very different reasons simultaneously. You capture all of the emotions and tensions so very well, and with all of the buildup, it's very satisfying to read. ♥

No hestitated - I write my fic in present tense, for the most part - but I do have hesitation:

C - A pairing you have never liked and probably never will

Harry/Voldemort. Sorry, but that is one ship I cannot get behind and find inherently horrifying and awful. I find Snily more understandable than Harry/Voldemort. 

E - Have you added anything stupid/cracky/hilarious to your fandom, if so, what

I mean. I did a few April Fools-y things on monsterblog. And I did write a Cherik P&P AU oneshot in purely cracky style. Other than that...

I hardly consider Star Wars to be “my” fandom, but I did suggest a wonderful idea which may be followed in This Delightful Tagthread.

And way back in the day, I made the wonderful post of Harry Potter Characters’ Favourite Drinks and @tobermoriansass and I made some wonderful cracky posts, most notably the Star Wars Sequel Trilogy/My Immortal crossover.

Honestly, though, I’m not really one for crack. 

P - Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas)