#sailing flags

Whenever those flames had the chance to light up his eyes, Lucien pounced on the opportunity without a second thought.

After all, that pirate was barely ever around, why let such a good view go to waste? The way the flames danced and beamed in his eyes was dreamy, he could get lost in there for eternity and remain content.

But,as always, he had to snap himself out of his thoughts; there was no way that love would be requited. Through snooping around, he had managed to gather up enough evidence to prove his teammate had his eye set on someone... Most likely someone else. That was what hurt the sentinel the most; he was never the priority.

Avoidance never payed off, he knew that...

However, he couldn't help but wonder if maybe once, things would be different; maybe it'd hurt less.

****

Barely had the first hot-dogs been cooked that Lucien excused himself away, not even needing to pretend being fatigued; it was his daily state by then. As he stepped foot into his room, he felt his world fade to black in a comforting, familiar way.

****

No one particularly liked to wake someone else up, as if it were breaking the very rules of being a mercenary. Besides, Scout and Henry were typically fine without him, or at least that's what the Distracteur had been led to believe. Regardless of the BLU team's preferences, a loud knock dragged Lucien out of his slumber. Work was work, it was unavoidable.

****

-You're meaning to tell me that you mistook me for someone else? Where the hell did you ever see another Distracteur?!

-Mate, 'told ya to watch out, listen up next time will ya?

-There was n- whatever...

No matter how many times he had died, the ache that spread throughout his entire body each time never got easier.

At least, he thought, it gave him a great excuse to lay back down for a bit.

****

The grass was particularly cold against his face, what a weird predicament he had found himself in this time around... How had he not died under that Heavy's boot was a mystery to every unlucky being that was there to witness it. His stomach jolted as he found footing. Standing was unavoidable...

****

Unlike the grass, the Medbay he was quickly forced into was boiling. His thoughts were so slow he wondered if someone hadn't snuck something into his drink ...

But, one thing he couldn't make up was how wonderful his coworker was...-

WAIT WHAT?

The one worker who was most afraid of the Medbay,there,at the foot of his bed?!

...

Liar liar... stupid liar..why would you lie to me like that?!

...

No matter how hard he tried, sleep was impossible. Tears kept soaking his pillow, even when Pyro had offered to dry it out.

He just had to leave, didn't he?.

And you just had to fall for him,didn't you?.

...

Speaking of dry, despite how moist his pillow was, his throat had ran dry. Sulking and sobbing for hours on end typically rendered him useless. Pyro had stayed by his side the whole time but, seeing how little progress they were making, he digressed.

See? Even he left you, Lu.

...

By the time the sun had risen, nothing more than a-

-Ayy, looke here, we got a husk on our team!

Husk had left the Distracteur's room. Where normally he might have dragged his feet, he now refused to budge, standing frozen in place in the hallway.

...

Frozen. The time felt frozen. It had only been one hour since he started waving his flag and his arms were more than ready to give up. He hadn't even bothered to take his megaphone. Why would he? He couldn't speak,let alone shout.

...

Matthew. The sentinel had seen him more times than he could count, especially that day. It made him wildly uncomfortable to see him. Why was it not his brother?

You're just so pathetic,he wants to remind you

Aggravated by how loudly his mind echoed of insecurity, his anger got redirected immediately towards a RED spy. His flag's pole broke. Rather than flinching, it just had became a greater weapon.

...

-Golly pal, you're a mess! Lookatcha!

-. . . Didn't notice. . . Thanks..

...

No matter how many times Engineer, Demo, Spy, Scout, Soldier, Pyro, Sniper, Heavy or Medic tried, it was futile. Futile,just like you.

The words wouldn't come out, actions weren't taken and it wasn't long before the team's liquor supply went down.

At first, the blame immediately went onto their infamous alcoholic. But as time went on, even he was confused about how quickly the supply dwindled. He was on field, how would he be able to bring them to field, let alone find the time to consume them...

...

-LUCIEN!!

Uh oh, that sounded...angry. He shrugged and sat up. Why had he been on the ground,he couldn't recall but, one thing was for sure, he didn't want that interaction at all.

Whereas normally his room was plain, clean but so painfully empty, it had gained quite the greenery; beer bottles scattered all over the floor. Dozens and dozens of them, to a point where counting them had been made impossible.

All the words of the world fell on flat ears, nothing truly mattered much. He had fallen yet again for the oldest trick in the book; love.

And, of course, that love left, as it always did...

Soon, he started celebrating. They had done it, so it seemed. There were no REDs on the field anymore. After a few glances left and right, he realized he was alone on field. Alone and soaked. The rain felt frigid. Barely after he had started making his way back to base, a flash of light caught his eye and he dashed inside. Lighting.

Being the last to come back to base also meant that towels had ran out. He was shivering. The Pyroman saw his teammate and offered to light the fireplace. Attempting to refuse was futile, he couldn't get a word out. The Distracteur instead left for the bathroom,he figured a warm bath while he waited for dry towels was the safest route to go. He found a bathrobe half slid under the door a dozen minutes later, it smelt of smoke... Of course they had used the fireplace to dry it.

Much better, Lucien thought. Warm, dry and with a hot cocoa. Now, he just had to get changed. He peeked into the living room and thanked his teammate, the hot cocoa was really well made.

As he walked his way back to his room, one thing slowly crept up in his mind.

Where was Henry? The pirate was there on field,wasn't he?... Had his colleague gone back to his boat? Possible but, they all fought so far from the ship that day, had he made a dash for it? Seemed unlikely, it would have been too long. So Henry was in base but...where?

He sighed, he had to get changed first.

A few days ago, Engineer figured out that the spare room next to Lucien's room was way colder, better for someone who usually slept outside. Since then, his room had gotten a few more visits. The rain also chose for him; waking up soaked wasn't something he particularly appreciated...

There was only one thing that Lucien hadn't gotten around to changing; the signage. The spare room still held his symbol. He kept pushing back about doing it, waiting for a calm day so he wouldn't be drained.

Upon entering his room, he noticed something...odd. The floor had water marks on them. His glasses were still wet,some details just too blurry for him to notice. But, he felt uneasy about this. Had someone gone to his room? Why? They could have at the very least asked, he wouldn't have said no. The occasional droplets dripping on his face started to annoy him. Besides, he liked seeing.

After wiping them, he immediately went for his closet; he was still in a bathrobe after all. As he opened the small door, he caught a glimpse of movement at the corner of his eye. He turned around, cautious. A shaking mass was on his bed, quiet sniffling accompanied the noise of the blanket every now and then.

"Hi?..." Lucien asked as he got closer to his bed. "...."

Seeing he got no answer, he chose to get dressed nonetheless. The only sweater he had and some shorts seemed a wise idea.

He sat at his desk, trying to ignore both a possible stranger in his bed and the ever so loud thunder. His hands played around with the pen more than he wrote.

Frustrated, and awfully tense, he let his head hit his desk. He wasn't writing enough and the th-

"Lucien?...." a shaky, strained voice asked.

He knew that voice, of course he did. Writing didn't seem so important anymore and the thunderstorm felt way less scary all of a sudden.

Maybe was it that the two didn't speak as often as they'd like to but, something sounded wrong. He tried to think but, he had never heard his friend sound so distressed.

He turned around, immediately dropping his pen on the desk.

Lucien and dexterity didn't always go hand in hand and,well, that was just another example. Right after his pen hit his desk, he tried to get up with haste and immediately stumbled in his chair, falling face flat on the ground.

"...Huh? Oh!. Uhm. Hi... Didn't expect you."

He awkwardly said. Seeing his friend teary-eyed like that... It definitely left him shook. He hoped Henry would be willing to open up unlike himself.

The clumsy man dashed out of his room, only returning with a tissue box and whatever else he found. A softer blanket, more towels, books, tea... he had racked his brain trying to find anything that could be comforting. Just to make it look more intentional, he placed it all in a basket he brought with him inside his room.

"Here, I felt bad that you're stuck out of your room in the middle of a storm. I didn't exactly know what you would prefer having so, I just gathered les essentiels."

With a shaking hand, Henry grabbed the basket and put it aside, instead pulling on Lucien's hand.

As he sighed, he sat oh the bed, immediately being met with a shaky, tight hug.

"..What book?..." "Hm?" "What book is it?.." "Alice in Wonderland." "Can you read it..for me..?" "Sure"

He smiled as he opened the book, clearing his throat to ensure the best voice acting he could provide.

If sleeping outside so often had changed anything on his sleeping habits, it had to be that he couldn't sleep when it was warm anymore. The sentinel kept on a pair of shorts in case of emergency, otherwise he would sleep in underwear. Even then, it was hard to find sleep in the mid-July heat. Slowly but surely, he drifted off.

One in the morning. Nearly no one was awake even though there was a Spy alert blasting. Both spies against the Distracteur. Mockery at an all time high, they said what nobody else said. "Tu nous fais hontes. Inutile et en plus tu oses massacrer notre langue?". Within seconds, both blades lacerated his neck and-

Had he ever screamed like that? Did he even scream? He hoped not. Please let it be that no one heard if it were the case.

Still in his shorts,barely bothering to put on his shoes, he ran outside. Wherever felt the calmest,he'd stay. Good if he fell asleep but, Lucien knew better than to count on that.

Luckily the sun rise was pretty. It may as well be the only nice thing to happen that day. He knew that he got irritable quicker when tired but, he didn't know how bad it was until he got to work. As usual, it was absolutely mandatory for the team to compare him to Scout, again.

That day he worked solo. He barely ever did but it happened. Solo work, in the case of the Distracteur, meant bringing the RED mercenaries rather close to base and then leaving. He didn't care who got the kill, as long as someone took care of it.

And, just like that, day was over. Somehow the team's sentinel had been the one to get the enemy briefcases back to base but, that also meant he felt awfully tired and weak.

The closest tree would do, he just needed some shade, nothing fancy. A quick breather and he'd go back to base, he thought. The BLUs had a meeting scheduled, after all.

Ah, right on the dot. For once he showed up on time at a meeting. Quite frankly, if it weren't for the provided pen and paper, he wouldn't have showed up. The Mannco. meetings always seemed to go on forever about little to nothing. And sincerely? Lucien never understood why they kept him around, the meetings felt just as useful as him.

The moment they wrapped up and he stepped foot out, he was immediately followed by Henry.

If there was anyone that made the Distracteur feel like he belonged, it was the Pirate. Just having him near made him lighten up after what felt like watching paint dry. It seemed like he wasn't the only grumpy one around. Hanging out seemed the only way to cheer up.

What day was it? Was it even day? He didn't have a clue. The air felt thick and something was in front of his eyes; he couldn't see. Lucien tried to remember something,just anything but, his mind felt awfully hazy, he could feel his head lolling forward. Super...une commotion de plus et doc m’étripe..., he thought to himself as some quiet shuffling sounds surrounded him.

Normally, his head would have perked up. Ever since he became a mercenary, however, Sniper's advice played on repeat. Mind your head, he'd often have to shout midst battle.

With so little happening, the captive wasn't sure if he had fallen asleep again or there was legitimately nothing for him to remember. Memories started to mesh together with close to no time clues.

The only reason some moments were more marking were because they marked the slow descent that brought him closer and closer to insanity and starvation.

Eventually, the cloth that wrapped his eyes was removed. The sudden change from darkness to broad daylight was enough to make his head pound again. In front of him stood what could only be classified as his worst nightmare: a RED spy holding a blade to his throat.

When the lights weren't overwhelmingly blinding anymore, Lucien took a look around. He seemed to be in the RED base. There was a small clock on the wall and a small barely legible calendar. Not even a day had gone by since he had been abducted and his hunger was killing him, something wasn't adding up. After a longer reflection however, he realized that it was to be expected, he couldn't remember eating much since the beginning of the week; it was Wednesday.

The spy had left when the captive opened his eyes again; the sentinel was conscious in waves. He avoided staying in the room with him too much, it was both awfully quiet and awfully loud. The RED team had been administered to keep the only Distracteur captive for as long as it took to know all the secrets of his work and therefor have one of their own.

It was now Thursday. He was lucky,so it seemed, the opposing mercenaries had taken pity on him and given him a single slice of stale bread and a lukewarm glass of water. They had since then untied him from the chair and cuffed him to chains on the wall, barely loose enough for him to be able to use his hands. His wrists bled as he bit down into the slice.

At least the day wasn't as painfully boring as yesterday had been, the RED medic paid him a visit the moment he noticed blood on the shackles. Not only were they cutting into his wrists but his previous injuries had yet to heal.

The enemy engineer also kept him company, mostly handling his own weapons in front of him. Lucien nearly yelled at him when he took off the ribbon that was normally tied on his flag. Upon seeing such a reaction, the examiner decided against throwing it out, folding it neatly and keeping it aside.

The air felt thicker by the afternoon, trapped in such a small room, the heat was bound to make it harder to focus. The pounding headache was quick to come back and make him lose grasp of time and reality.

The cool breeze of early mornings woke him up, a window was slightly agape. Lucien hadn't felt this unwell in a while. Whilst sure, barely surviving didn't feel exactly amazing either, he could at least move if the position was uncomfortable. But now? He didn't even get that privilege.

The day was mellow, barely anyone was in base except Medic and,with the heat, things turned hazy rather fast.

That was until a loud thud caught his attention. No it couldn't be, BLU never would have sent someone to get him, he thought. Another thud accompanied by rushed stomping made it difficult to deny. When the door broke down right before the Distracteur's eyes, it was undeniable. The pirate had came for him.

Scout, him, had enough energy to bother any and everyone in his way. The Distracteur, on the other hand, was lucky to make it to somewhere safe, often sleeping outside nearby the pirate's ship when exhaustion grew too heavy. The team knew where to find him, just in case. It was close to the battlefield, but secluded enough where no one went unless they needed him.

The sun was setting down when Henry went out of the ship. He needed a few bits of information at the base, a relatively quick outing,so he thought. He had often seen that red flag, that braid and that visor. Lucien seemed so energetic and enthusiastic, it felt like a shame that he was so opposed to REDs. He looked like he'd get along with the other pirate so well, he thought.

Upon hopping off the ship, he took a closer look, it seemed the only other BLU around was already fast asleep. It was the first time Henry was this close to the sentinel and something immediately struck him once his eyes locked onto his face; the exhaustion. From a distance, it's hard to make out one's expression. From this close however? It was clear that the BLU ploy's energetic behavior was a lie, a facade. Heavy eye-bags sat underneath his eyes and despite the constant outdoor work, he seemed rather pale.

Originally, the stroll that the pirate was going on should have been short. But, he refused to leave someone so tired to sleep out in the open instead of on a comfortable bed in a nice and warm room. With Lucien and his equipment to carry, what should have taken him twenty minutes took him closer to forty.

Once the doors of the base were crossed, getting the Distracteur to his room was child's play, all the mercenaries were gathered in the kitchen, Medic directed Henry and that was it. To his surprise, the room felt so...bare. The pirate thought it would have been cozy yet messy, he thought of him as someone who would rush around,scattering everything whilst also inviting people over but no, a few boxes under his bed, a small pile of barely colored coloring sheets and a grey blanket were it. His pillow was nowhere to be found, maybe he didn't even have one. Nonetheless, it seemed better than sleeping outside and so, he laid Lucien down,covered him properly with the blanket, and left.

Walking back to the ship, his mind kept wandering back. How long had the exhaustion dragged the Distracteur down? How come not even Medic seemed surprised to hear he fell asleep on the field? That didn't seem normal... As soon as he stepped foot back inside the ship, Kraken had already made his way to the door, a worried look etched on his face -Where were you?...

-Well, I did go to Base like I said I would... just, not alone. That sentinel was asleep nearby and he didn't look so good, took him with me. Kraken smiled softly, of course Henry took time for that. He left the room only for the other pirate to barge in.

-Oh look at who we got here- didja get lost on the way or what?, he teased. -No I did not. As I said, I had to bring someone along,Henry answered. -Oooh really? Who?? You can't just not tell me! -No -Come on- pleaseee? -No. go away.. -please please pl- -The Distracteur- -Was he sleepin' near again? -Yea, I felt bad leaving him there, I haven't seen someone look so tired in a while… On that note, Henry left to his room. His clothes felt uncomfortable and he really needed a calm moment to himself. Once changed, he immediately went to the library, surrounding himself with books. Maybe an hour went by before his mind started wandering again. How did it get that bad? Was Lucien not sleeping enough? Maybe was it stress? He didn't know him much, if he even did, how could he even help? He pondered the question until it was time to get some shut eye.

The pirate woke up early, earlier than he would have liked to. He had to figure something out. If reading helped him calm down, maybe it could do the same for his BLU co-worker? He had to try. But how could he even get him to come with him. He owed RED, maybe taking advantage of that might work? No matter how hard he thought of it, nothing came to mind. He'd just have to go on the field and ask him directly. Before the day on the field even began, Henry already seemed tense. The idea of going on field itself didn't please him, add onto that having to ask a co-worker he barely knew to come read with him made it seemingly worse.

When the day did start, it was as if yesterday didn't happen for Lucien. Ran everywhere, Pyroman, Demoman,Scout and even Spy worked alongside him. By the time it was noon, the victory was already near. Sitting by himself, the team's ploy wasn't paying much attention, mindlessly picking at the skin around his nails. It wasn't until the Pirate was standing just short of three feet away from him that he realized someone was talking to him. -You there uhh..pal? -Huh? Oh- Hadn't noticed you,sorry. Didn't expect you on field either, was this discussed yesterday? -No... uh no,it wasn't- I just wanted to- check? on you?.. You looked dead tired yesterday... -Oh. Whilst I do appreciate the kind gesture, don't fret over what Medic already knows. It's just who I am,after all... -Well... I was wondering.. maybe- would you like to come with me to the ship's library t-tonight?- I uh- it's okay if you can- -Why, such a kind offer, I fail to see how I could refuse. A kind nod ended the discussion before, without warning,the horn blasted near them, break was apparently over. A backstab sent him to re spawn,the RED Demo-man cornered him and a head-shot from the enemy Sniper's all it took. When the day was over, he had probably been to re spawn more than three times. The Distracteur seemed annoyed, faded scars reminding him of what went down just that afternoon as he made his way over where he'd typically just sleep. When he got there, Henry hadn't arrived just yet. His feet felt as heavy as lead,and the world might have started spinning quicker... Regret was starting to settle in, how would he even manage to stay awake to read if just getting there drained him as much...

When Henry arrived, he was met with the weakest wave he had ever seen. Despite feeling like a total wreck,a faint smile lit up Lucien's face. Perhaps it wasn't a mistake after all. The pirate found it adorable. He smiled warmly as he brought his guest in.