#sadkid

I'm not in it but it's mine

I'm trying so hard to be a child so it can be justified as a fucking 'child'-hood

I'm sitting in the corner

hands on my mouth to muffle the sobs

visions blurring, teary eyed

looking at the yelling man

violence magnifying

hands and cheeks and throat

red, blue, red

I'm begging the man to stop

I'm begging him to stop hitting her

I'm begging on my knees on the floor

She tells me to go away

I'm still begging

He doesn't stop

Somewhere in that moment, my grief turns to anger

I want to kill the man

but I can't

I don't even carry his blood

I don't even know him

He's not the man from my childhood

It's over, it's over.

I'm sorry the trauma stayed.

love-sadKiD - Pity

your daughter never does what I expect her to

your daughter lets me down

your daughter does that

your daughter does this

your daughter does—

your daughter—

your—

like I'm not his, never his.