#ryland grace#phm#rocky the eridian#project hail mary spoilers
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With everyone going off in tags, it just hit me how funny rvb fuckability polls must look for people outside of Red vs Blue fandom. Like your non-rvb followers see you reblogging a poll with two nearly identical character models, mainly they just have armor in different colors - and in the tags you are foaming at the mouth and rattling bars of your enclosure, screaming how one character in the picture is sexier than the other.
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I have a headcanon that out of all guys in RvB Tucker is the only one who is freaking HOT. Objectively 10/10, jaw-dropping material. If he could keep his mouth shut for two minutes, everyone interested would throw themselves at him. Unfortunately, keeping his mouth shut for two minutes is something that has never happened to Tucker.
I often ponder over the fact that my fandoms vary from kids show to adult books and Red vs Blue stands RIGHT in the middle.
Sometimes I look into the shape of distant clouds and these shapes look like Red vs Blue season 19 that takes place right after season 18. Reds and Blues get into new epic adventure without Donut and their quest takes them across the Universe and wherever they go they keep running into people who know them because they know Donut. It happens over and over and over again, so at some point they get the point. Like, the whole gang can be captured by space pirates. They are surrounded and held at gunpoint, the air is tense, the soundtrack keeps you on tiptoes... And one of R&Bs says:
"Just one question. Do you people know... Donut?"
And those evil space pirates go all giddy and joyful, because: "OMG! You are the guys Donut kept talking about!"
At some point our guys run into this mysterious person - of course he's revealed to be Donut - and they ask him: "How did you do that???"
Turns out Donut became friends with all kind of folk from outlaws to ancient alien races via book clubs, agricultural projects, knitting classes, volunteering at dogs' daycare and so on. He's just been trying lots of different hobbies and meeting new people, you know!
This is how Grif knows Simmons wants a wedding: Simmons keeps bitching about it. It starts as something impersonal, maybe they're discussing a movie with a wedding scene in it, and Simmons suddenly blows up and calls that scene stupid and weddings altogether stupid. Later he keeps turning their conversations to the theme of weddings, adding more things to the pile of stuff he hates. At some point they would vibe in silence for 10 minutes until Simmons would abruptly say: "Do you know what ELSE I hate about weddings?" And as this goes on, things get progressively detailed and specific to the point that wedding invitations in one particular font are especially ugly and should never see the light of day. Grif has to memorize every single thing, because if he forgets something, than Simmons would bitch FOR REAL.
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Alright, I'm going to confess a dirty secret: the whole "Simmons keeps bitching about weddings, and that's how Grif knows he wants one" comes from idea-for-a-fic-I-will-never-write. The opening of a fic was supposed to go like this: Tucker once joked about being the best man in case these two idiots finally decide to marry, He began to regret it when Grif came to him and said: "Well dude, the time has come. You're my best man and as my best man you're going to help me find engagment and wedding rings". Mind you, that Chorus is still not at the state when jewelry is widely available. And then the two of them go on some epically stupid quest. At some point Tucker starts to wonder, is this really necessary, why is Grif so sure that Simmons needs the damn rings. So Grif tells hiim all about Simmons' bitching, and Tucker realizes that Simmons is, in fact, a sucker for weddings. And yeah, he absolutely needs the damn rings.
Kai should feed Tucker some crazy made-up story about legally registering "bow-chica-bow-wow" as her trademark, so now he has to pay her royalties each time he says it. And the bottom line of the joke would be that she "has done it some time ago but forgot to tell", so now he owes her a nice sum. "I can pay you with my body? Bow-chicka-- on no, wait". "Too late! Plus 200 bucks!"
Putting some fun into studies.
I always draw Simmons’ cyborg eye as red and I’ve seen many artists do so, but this painting made me think about HOW his new parts had to be done aaand since they were made from a robot kit, here I present you a yellow cyborg eye made from a robot’s visor. This idea came to me suddenly, and I think it’s pretty cool. I also think I’d never draw him again like that :’D
Also people usually draw his human eye as green, which I never do. I like to give him a hazel eye, because that would make Grif have hazel/(dark)brown “heterochromia”, and that may take a loooong time to notice. Which I think could be pretty funny. Just imagine someone having a lenghy conversation with Grif, and at some point they notice his “heterochromia”, The realisation is so sudden and it’s such a surprise that they blurt out: “Oh, your eyes are different color!”. To which Grif replies very calmly, philosophical even: “Well, as you may have noticed by now, half of my face was torn off from abother guy and then stapled to me. Now, where the fuck do you think my left eye comes from?”
