#royalelephant

I wouldn’t completely say I don’t, ‘cause in some respects I do, but not when it comes to talking about what’s going on with me. These thoughts, feelings, and emotions I have don’t get shared with anyone. Partly because I can’t speak them, partly because I don’t trust people (including my really close online/tumblr friends) and various other reasons [though the two I mentioned are the main two I think]. 

It’s just, I’m always there for them. I sacrifice sleep and studying and things I want to do for them. But they don’t do the same for me. Current example is one of my “best” friends is also best friends with two other girls from our class. These two girls are best friends with each other. I thought it’d be fine and fun because her and I were best friends and they were. But it’s turned into a trio now with me alone. But my “best” friend will complain to me about them occasionally and how they make her feel and how sometimes one of the two girls isn’t evenly dividing her time between her and the other girl and I’m just listening to her thinking how she’s doing that to me. She expects me to give her all of my attention but won’t do the same for me.