#roxy hotten

Still being a relatively 'newby' onto the wedding scene, having started my business just over two years ago, I didn't really know what to expect when other professionals spoke of the 'wedding season'.

Well, I do now...

I have just spent the busiest, happiest, unique few months of my life, with weddings, weddings, weddings galore. I've met so many amazing people, visited some incredible venues, and shared in one of the most important days that many people will experience with a range of generous, kind and friendly brides and grooms. The fact that they have let me, someone who started their journey of planning their ceremony with them as a complete stranger, come into their lives and for them to so generously share their stories with me is an honour and a privilege.

For me, one of the highest compliments I can be paid is when a wedding guests comes up to me afterwards and says ‘That was great – you captured them so well.’  Even better is when a guest thinks I’ve been a long-term friend of the couple, and I must admit, there are many couples who I go into a slight mourning afterwards as I miss them! That’s one of the real differences between celebrants and registrars.  A relationship is established between us, and I’m always on hand for any questions, concerns, clarifications or reassurances.  I get to know you, and I deliver something personal, not off-the-shelf.

I’ve worked at some outstanding venues this season too, from the very impressive such as Cliveden House and Botley’s Mansion, to highly personal venues, chosen for sentimental reasons such as the school grounds where the bride’s father had taught for many years to the gardens of the groom’s family home.  I’ve worked at some quintessentially English Country Inns such as Crown Inn Amersham and the Olde Bell Hurley, to places whose current use belies a history full of interest, such as the old car factory at Ladbroke Hall and an ex-Tabernacle in Shoreditch  

Whether you’re planning a wedding or renewal of vows with only a handful of guests, or one which is on a much larger scale, I’m always happy to meet for a no-obligation discussion to see whether I can help make your perfect day a reality.

I am so fortunate in this job to learn something new each time I do a ceremony.  Some of ‘my’ best ideas come from the couple themselves and I always have my ears open to interesting ways to them make their guests feel a part of their ceremony, rather than merely observers.   

One bride I worked with had many close female friends and found it hard to choose bridesmaids.  In the end, she chose her sister, and celebrated her supportive female friendships by giving them an orchid to wear around their wrist during the ceremony.  I mentioned in the ceremony that these women had provided love and support to the bride, not only during her preparation for the wedding, but throughout her life. They were distinguished amongst the many guests by the wearing of the orchid, a flower whose meaning includes love, beauty, and strength, all qualities shared between the bride and these female friends.

Another idea I was given by a couple was including a ring blessing into the ceremony.  Both the bride and groom had come from religious backgrounds and despite not being religious themselves, they wanted to acknowledge that many family and friends amongst their guests were.  Prior to the arrival of the bridal party, I invited all their guests, once seated, to spend a moment blessing both rings, which were tied with colourful ribbons to a cushion.  For those who were religious, they could spend a moment asking for God to support them throughout their journey; for those who were not, they could think about what support they could give to the couple during their marriage.

I also worked with a couple who both had young children from previous relationships.  Their wedding was not only about them coming together, but of these two families joining as one.  The five children’s ages ranged from three to fifteen, and we found a role which chose each and everyone one of them.  The youngest boy walked the bride in.  The youngest girl had the rings tied around her wrist and brought them up for the exchange.  The three eldest children wrote and read a reading which they had all written together for their mum and dad.  Even the family dog got involved at one point, jumping on the stage and nearly stealing the show!

How far in advance should you book your celebrant?  Well, that completely depends.  The shortest period of time I've ever had between an enquiry and delivering the ceremony was just under two weeks, and the longest has been 18 months.

The shortest one was due to the fact that the bride's family priest has decided at the last minute he wasn't happy about blessing their marriage (the couple had done the legal aspect of their marriage abroad); this was despite having agreed to do it many months beforehand.  The poor bride rang me in desperation, hoping I would be able to help, and was extremely relieved to find out that I could.  I must admit, I really felt for her - what a horrible situation to be placed in at such short notice. 

To give you an indication of my bookings, my busiest months are June, July, August and September.  The most popular days I'm booked are, unsurprisingly, Saturday's, with Friday's being the next most popular, then Sunday's.  However, I still have some availability for some days in these months, and its always worth sending me a quick email to check if I still have a date free.  And usually if I'm booked up, I will suggest another member of the Fellowship of Professional Celebrants to you.

So, in answer to the question 'How far in advance to book', I would suggest you enquire as soon as you've chosen your date.  I'm always happy to pencil in dates until we've had an initial meeting, and you've decided whether you'd like to use me.  Always feel free to give me a ring to ask me any questions you may have too - I'm always happy to help.