#roadhog reader

Small and cute

Two words that were over and over in Mako’s brain as he silently watched you while simultaneously ‘listening’ to Jamie go on and on about setting off some bombs here and there and making off with as much as they could carry tomorrow morning. You were propped up on an elbow still blinking sleep from your eyes, when you had finally seemed to wake up enough to realise what was happening you had exchanged some words with the person next to you, Mako didn’t like that, he knew what the two of you were talking about, hell he knew what everyone in the camp was whispering “Junkrat and Roadhog the number one cause of death and destruction in the outback” not that he was complaining that the entire camp was terrified, it allowed them peace and quiet, no one in their right mind would disturb them and Mako might finally get some sleep, if Jamie ever shut up that is.

But here you were across from the both of them, all tucked up cosy like, Mako’s heart could barely take it, you were adorable and Mako had no problem admitting to himself that cute things were the best, he loved little pigs, soft toys and cute things just because he was the towering death of the outback didn’t mean he couldn’t enjoy the softer things life had to offer.

 He hadn’t realised he had been staring until your eyes locked with his, well you had actually just noticed his mask was pointed in your direction, and the look on your face changed, you suddenly looked terrified, like you were ready to run. He was used to this, he’d see someone adorable and then frighten them off before he ever got the chance to speak to them, not this time though, he thought, he had to do something that wouldn’t frighten you. Before he knew what he was doing he gave an enthusiastic ‘thumbs up’.

 Your face had changed again to confusion this time, until you returned the gesture with a small hint of a smile on your mouth after a short time you settled back down and seemed to fall asleep.

 “I see what you’re lookin’ at Hog, she’s cute, you like cute hehehehehe”

 Roadhog hadn’t even noticed Junkrat had stopped talking until he started again, to be fair Hog put Rat’s voice in the category of fuzzy background noise now, only really listening when the words ‘money’ and ‘heist’ were thrown in.

 “…….”

 “Maybe we should go talk to uh’, I think she’s pretty too y’know”

 “Go to sleep”

 “Yeah ya’ right mate, sleep now, talk to the pretty girl and explode stuff tomorrow”

 Junkrat added enthusiastic finger guns for emphasis, Roadhog just lay down and let his eyes close he was going to make the most of not having to build their fire tonight, eventually he heard Junkrat settle down beside him and finally drifted off to sleep.  

 It was just beginning to get light when you woke up it must have been about 6am, judging by the movement around the camp people seemed eager to be getting going, you knew why of course the two Junkers would surely let off some bombs and Molotov cocktails before they left, best to be out with the early crew. You sat up and began folding your blanket to put back into your bag, glancing across to where the Junkers had slept for the night you saw Roadhog still asleep but Junkrat was gone, oh shit no wonder people were bee-lining for their vehicles.

 “Mornin’ love whatchya got in the bag huh?”

 The voice next to you was far too close and you only managed to choke down your scream knowing who the voice belonged to but the look on your face must’ve given away how startled you actually were, turning your body to face him you found yourself locked eyes with Junkrat who was crouching beside you with his face far too close to yours, personal space certainly wasn’t a requirement in outback society but always appreciated, this kid obviously didn’t care for it.

 “Not much of a talker huh? That’s okay listen I wanna ask ya somethin’ yeah?”

 “…yeah”

 “HA! She does talk! Me names Junkrat nice ta’ meet ya”

 he extended a metal hand and reluctantly you returned yours for a firm handshake.

 “Trigger, nice ta meet you too”

 you couldn’t decide if the smile on his face was a good or bad sign, never the less you smiled back just as enthusiastically until you realised you’d been shaking hands for longer than intended to abruptly letting go.

 “So anyways me n’ Hog wa thinkin’ that maybe you need some company travelling to wherever ya goin’ hmmm?”

 Oh shit, this had happened to you before, people offer protection on the road for favours which nearly always had something to do with your body, what if you said no, would they just kill you right now? Oh shit you were taking too long to answer oh god now you’re sweating oh shit the look on your face must have given away your thought process

 “Hey hey calm down love, this is a legit offer, no sex required, although if you do got any water or food it wouldn’t go unappreciated whaddya say?”

 “ummmmm……. well I…. uhhhhhhh”

 You hadn’t noticed the heavy footsteps behind you, it was when you heard the heavy breathing that you turned again to see Roadhog standing behind you; his stature was intimidating and coupled with the fact that you were all of 5 ft something and still sitting you were sure that if he wanted to he could crush you beneath one big boot.

 “AHHHH HOGGY I SEE YOU’RE UP I WAS JUST MAKING FRIENDS!”

 Junkrat’s voice yelling pretty much in your ear made you jump yet again, as if it wasn’t enough that you were already so on edge, you could feel your anxiety creeping up in your chest making your lungs tight and your heart beat even faster. You looked back up at Roadhog and attempted the same smile you’d given him last night, you knew that there was fear in your eyes and trying to hide it was borderline painful. Roadhog only continued to stare down at you with his head tilted slightly until you were almost violently grabbed by your shoulders and forced to turn back to face Junkrat.

 “So! What’s the answer? You want some protection or what?”

 “Rat!”

 Roadhog’s voice silenced Junkrat’s immediately and judging by Junkrat’s face you gathered that Roadhog couldn’t’ve been too happy with the conversation.

 “I’m sorry miss, Rat lets go”

 “AWWWW!!! C’mon Hog! I was jus’ bein’ nice!”

 You thought about your options as Roadhog grabbed Junkrat’s good arm about to drag him away. Oh god what were you getting yourself into

 “Hey wait!” your voice was shaky and just loud enough for both of them to hear

 “……...ummmm actually I wouldn’t mind some road protection, and I do also have some spare food and water that I can pay you with”

 you were sure Junkrat’s face was almost splitting with how wide his smile was, Roadhog however still had his back to you but he had stopped, you slowly stood up and began to walk towards the two; Roadhog let go of Rat’s am and the smaller scrambled to his foot as Roadhog turned to you. Before you knew what was happening Junkrat had his arm around your shoulders leading you towards the vehicles area.

 “Oh this is gonna be great! Don’t you worry ya’ pretty little head we’re the best of the best ain’t no one gonna mess with ya’ while you’re with us!”

 Roadhog watched as Rat lead you past him, he was going to kill his boss later Junkrat was impulsive and Hog really would have preferred to know how many weapons you had before offering anything, still, you were pretty small and if push came to shove Hog could surely snap your neck real quick before you did any damage, plus you did look pretty scared of them so he figured you wouldn’t even try anything, and not that he’d ever admit it to Rat but he was kinda’ happy that you’d taken the offer.

 As you reached the area you’d parked your bike the night before you saw an empty space where your bike had previously been parked

 “WHAT THE FUCK SOMEONE TOOK MY BIKE! WHO THE HELL STOLE MY SHIT!?” glancing around you saw people looking away from you, you realised you were still standing with Junkrat and Roadhog, of course no one was going to talk, not with those two there.

 “Hey hey calm down love its fine, you can still ride with us its all good, we’ll find ya a place to get a new bike yeah?”

 You turned to Junkrat with tears threatening to spill over, you couldn’t believe it, you’d had that bike since you could remember and now it was just gone.

 “C’mon”

 You heard Roadhog’s deep voice and felt his massive hand on your shoulder and turned you towards their bike. It was huge! And of course a Hog, call the junkers what you would you couldn’t deny they didn’t have good taste. You watched as the smaller junker bounded to the bike and practically dived into the side car fidgeting until he seemed to get comfortable.

 “C’mon c’mon! letsgoletsgoletsgo!”

 Roadhog and yourself walked over to the bike and as Roadhog sat down you wondered where you would fit, there didn’t look like much room left on there.

 “uhhhh where will I sit?” your voice was quiet and sheepish

 They both looked at you before Roadhog scooched forward and pat the seat behind him, you lifted your leg over the bike and did your best to get comfy, there wasn’t a great deal of room and you felt kind of squished, as Roadhog started up the engine it roared load and intimidating, just like the hog himself, it was much more powerful than any bike you had ever ridden and it did startle you a bit, you ended up throwing your arms around Roadhog before you really realised what you were doing feeling the man tense under your touch you loosened your grip, you muffled out a sorry that was far too soft to reach anyone’s ears under the loud rumble of the bike, you did however manage to pick up a “Hold on tight” from Roadhog before the bike tore out of the campsite.

The rumble of your dirt bike between your legs while you made your way down one of the vast emptied roads of the outback made you feel safe, having had this bike since you were a kid and when the omnium blast had hit it was the only thing that had been your source of transportation. You had heard about people who had accepted rides when hitchhiking and you had no intention of meeting their fate, whether they had been stripped of their belongings and left for dead or actually killed, and sometimes even eaten, meat was hard to come by in the outback and some people were desperate enough to get down to the nitty gritty, thus your bike was the most important thing in your life.

 Squinting to see through the film of dust that covered your goggles as you drove you saw the light was beginning to get low, you would soon have to make a decision on if you’d stop, find shelter and camp somewhere by yourself, find a Trader’s camp where the people actually respected the rules of the camp, or keep driving through the night which could be dangerous as Junkers and Raiders tended to be more active when the sun went down, easier to get the jump on people in low light.

 You looked down to your fuel tank, not too bad but definitely could use more gas, wouldn’t make it till morning if you kept driving. That settles it, the next traders camp would be a good hour and a half along the road, they were situated every 100 ks or so, giving you time to prepare yourself for the many people who would no doubt want whatever goods you had on you unfortunately that also included you. Being a woman in the radiated shit land that Australia had become was by no means easy, you had to be quick

 ‘kill em’ before they get their cock out’

 That was your motto and it hadn’t failed you yet, and yes the situation had presented itself on more than one occasion, leaving you with a nice full duffle bag of money, food, water and anything else shiny that would either just go to waste or be scavenged by the next person to stumble across the body, waste not want not.

 When you reached the camp it was just on dark, pulling up you parked your bike with the cars and motorbikes that belonged to the Traders, Junkers and Raiders already set up for the night. Taking off your goggles and bandanna that covered your face while riding allowed you to breathe the mostly clean air, your hair greasy and dusty at the same time, god you hated upkeep of it, but you just couldn’t bear to shave it off as so many did in the wasteland, adjusting your duffle bag on your shoulder you made sure your knife was easily accessible just in case, no harm right. First things first you had to find a place to set up for the night, somewhere not to secluded but somewhere that you weren’t going to get assaulted.

 This was a camp you had stopped at before the last time you had travelled this way and the permanent Traders here had seemed to enforce the ‘no murder, thieving or rape’ rule so that was a plus, good camps were hard to find, many of the NSW ones were just a straight up no thank you.

 As you moved through the camp the Traders began their spiels,

 “CLEAN WATER OVER HERE!”

 “CANNED FOOD CHEAP GET IT NOW BEFORE IT SELLS OUT!”

 “SPARE PARTS FOR BIKES, CARS AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN!”

 “OIL AND FUEL COME AND GET IT!”

 Aha! Fuel there it is, you made your way over to that particular trader’s set up, he had jars of grimy looking petrol but hey, you weren’t going to get it better anywhere else, not around these parts anyways.

“Oh hello miss what are you looking for? Each jar costs two water bottles and a can of food”

the man looked as if he would be able to punch his fist all the way through your head and out the other side if he felt like it, but he was friendly so you decided what the heck, sure you could have gotten it cheaper at another stall but eh, you were tired.

“unleaded thanks” you say opening your bag, fortunately you had water and food to spare, well that was kind of a lie, but you could go without for a few days when you ran out in a week or so, or if you were lucky hit a good scavenge.

 The man took the payment quickly inspecting the goods you had so willingly handed over, when he was confident that the payment hadn’t been tampered with in some way he handed you a bottle and wished you a nice night, ah shit, maybe you had just made yourself a target for a stab n’ grab.

 You headed over to one of the fire pits that litter the site, this side of the camp seemed to be mostly people like yourself, just passing through, didn’t want no trouble, head down kinda people. Sitting by the fire you searched through your bag for your blanket, it was old and worn but still would keep you warm on a cold night.

 Laying down you propped your head against your bag, the camp was busy and there were people singing songs and talking, it was a welcomed background noise though, you felt safe as you closed your eyes and waited for sleep to come.

 It wasn’t the noise that woke you, it was the quiet, the entire camp seemed to be silent except for a low thudding sound that was almost shaking the ground. Cracking one eye open you realised that all the people who were still awake were staring at something, rubbing the sleep from your eyes you realised that it was a someone that everyone seemed to be mesmerised, a giggle and a grunt alerted you to the fact that it was more than one someone. The two figures moved through the camp until they reached the fire pit that you had lay down at.

 “Ahhhhh this looks like a good spot!” you heard one of them say, slowly your eyes adjusted and you could properly see the two figures on the opposite side of the fire to you

Slowly you looked the two men up and down, the fire providing an orange glow, one of them was scrawny, typical for the outback, missing an arm and a leg it looked like, he was now muttering something hushed to the other one who was with him you couldn’t make out exactly what he was saying but you did hear the word bomb a few times, great! That really made you feel safe and secure here. The other one, holy shit, he was huge! must be at least seven-foot-tall, and he was wearing a mask, again, unsettling. Hold on you though to yourself looking at the mask again and then at his pot belly, sure enough your suspicions were confirmed, looking for clarification you gestured to the person beside you.

 “Hey are they?”

 “Yeah, Junkrat and Roadhog”

 “Well shit” you stammer under your breath before turning your attention back to the Junkers who were no less than ten feet away. They seemed to be unaware of all the eyes on them, chatting, well it was actually just Junkrat chatting until you realised that Roadhog had apparently turned his attention to you. You stared for a moment like a rabbit caught in headlights, the eyes of his mask reflecting the fire that acted as a barrier between you and them, oh god you were terrified, this is it, this is how you die, you’ve offended Roadhog by making eye contact and now he’s going to crush your head between his boot and the pavement, or maybe Junkrat would force feed you a bomb and detonate it, you’d heard the stories, how many of them were true you had no idea, but you were sure as hell didn’t want to find out.