#rlde notes

The morning after Jason's rescue.

Danny: Jason, now please tell me why Red Hood attacked you?

Jason: What?

Danny: I understand that we don't know each other very well, but according to my internal clock we`ve been married for years now, so you can tell me everything!

Jason: ???????????????????

Danny: And so, here's a little warning!

Danny: If a girl with long hair and Fenton surname will come to you for a talk… Don`t listen. Just walk away. If she has time to say “first of all”, then run. Because she has prepared research, charts and will destroy you.

Danny: Aaaand If the girl is small, it's pointless to run or pretend to be dead. This little goblin will catch you anywhere. So just… Pray. She will get bored. Probably. Someday.

Danny: If you meet people in hazmat suits, you are… Probably safe? Except for some situations, when you`re not. Determine by whether they are pointing blasters at you or in the other direction.

Danny: Oh! How can I forget! If some billionaire approach you for adoption don`t trust him.

Danny and Jason at the same time: Cause he has another identity and secret lair under the manor.

Danny: Wait what?

1

Danny: So. I kinda sorta met a vigilante Tucker and Sam: Okay Danny: Aaand heisaghost Tucker and Sam: What??? Danny: He is a ghost. Handsome, but… Sam: Remind me the main rule? Danny: No dating ghosts Tucker: And why? Danny: Because they are as emotionally stable as an Ikea table Sam: So? Danny: So, nothing happened! Gosh, have some faith in me. I`d rather finally receive text from Jason. He's a very ordinary person and definitely not a ghost, and he doesn't wear a stupid helmet covering his face.

2

Dan, dramatically appearing in Jason’s life in all ghostly glory: Hello

Jason: Ok. Two things: 1. Where have you been all my life? 2. Can you please go back there and never return?

Danny to Dan: Why are you like this?

Dan: I have completely mastered the right way to do everything wrong.

Danny: Vlad’s influence?

Dan: Vlad’s influence.

3

Vlad: I lost Dan. Danny: What??? HOW??? Vlad: Well, after that last fight and possession of Clockwork, he possessed me, and then your clone... Anyway, it's a long story. The point is, he's gone. Danny: Where did he go? And wait. There was another clone?? Vlad: ...actually, several, but that's not important. What matters is that Dan is missing! Danny: ..... Vlad: You'll help me find him, my boy, won't you? Danny: It's time for a family meeting... Vlad: ))))) Danny: Don't even think we won't come back to the conversation about clones. Vlad: (((((((((((

Danny: It seems that Jason likes me! Tucker: Congratulations, dude! Danny: More like Jason likes Phantom, but isn't that almost the same? Sam: No, I can’t stand it anymore! I'm renaming the Paulina Syndrome to the Jason Syndrome. It's official now.

Meanwhile, Dan, still shocked: Wedding?... Phantom's wedding? And he didn't even invite me! Dan, looking at his reflection, where he looks exactly like Danny, and laughing maniacally: Danny took everything from me, so I'll take this from him! Danny and Dani: Why do I suddenly feel like I have an additional competitor? Danny and Dani, looking at each other: Probably just my imagination.

My work “Life's rule number one” now lives its own life in my head.

I hope to write more, but for now you can have this.

Danny, sad because Jason doesn't write: :(

Sam and Tucker: …

Danny, even sadder: :((((((((

Tucker: Oh, you ghostly devil. Okay, you talked me into it, I'll hack his phone and found out IP

Danny: :))))))))))

(Meanwhile, Jason got rid of the temporary phone by throwing it into the deep water.)

Tucker, calculating the location: …

Tucker: I don't know how to tell you, dude. But he's at the bottom.

Danny: Like Rock Bottom?

Tucker: No, like at the bottom of the river

Danny: He probably accidentally dropped the phone. But what should I do now? :(((

Sam: .....

Danny: :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

Sam: OKAY! I'll ask Poison Ivy for help! But you'll owe me for this, Danny!

Danny: :))))))))))))))))

Sam: And I'll also write to your sister

Danny: :(((((((((((

 after the events of  Life's rule number one

Danny, wakes up with a hangover: Oh no…Another second and I'll die twice.

Tucker: Our alcoholic is awake!

Sam: When you remember last night, you'll die three times.

Danny: Why does everyone call me an alcoholic when I drink alcohol, but when I drink fanta no one says I'm fantastic? Wait... three times???

Sam: Once out of shame and once because you really poured 5 shots of vodka into yourself on an empty stomach. How can you treat your body like this…

Danny: Hey! My body is a temple. Ancient and crumbling. And a little bit cursed. And! In alcohol defense I’ve done some pretty dumb shit while completely sober too.

Tucker, waving a napkin: Speaking of dumb shit. Guess what's here.

Sam: Isn't it a phone number of some kind, hm?

Danny:.....give it back to me.

Tucker: The magic word?

Danny: Now!

Tucker, dramatically sighing: And this is my best friend! Whom I selflessly helped not to fall into the dirt face!

SAM: And giggled behind his back.

Tucker, as seriously as possible: Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding that your best friend is such an idiot.

Danny, taking the napkin and looking at it through the pain with one eye: Wow, even the numbers are readable. And why a napkin?

Sam: You were too excited, so you kept missing the letters. After you named the contact Jozer instead of Jason and your sweetheart started having a nervous tic, we decided not to let you disgrace yourself anymore and grabbed what we found first. Be thankful it's not toilet paper.

Danny, falling face into the pillow with shame: Thank you!

Sam: Well, hero-lover, can we help you write a message before you finally lose all the points of respect in the eyes of that guy?

Danny: *a pained moan into the pillow*

Tucker: By the way, he left on a cool black bike.

Danny: *pained but interested moan into the pillow*

Sam: Or maybe we should just drop off his number to Jazz?

Danny, turning his head: I was just trying to suffocate myself, why in this house you don't even let me die peacefully??

Sam: So it`s a “yes”?

Sam, feeling sorry for Danny, wrote to Dani, not Jazz. And so Dani, abandoning all her business, flew to Gotham.

Danny, suffering: Weren't you so busy on your summer vacation?? Dani: Very. But the wedding is more important. Jason: The wedding?? Whose?? Dani, looking at Jason with an appraising glance: Have you already become engaged with my brother or sister? Jason: No Dani: Great, then ours. Danny: I saw him first! Dani: And achieved nothing since. Jason: You're too young for me to begin with!!! Dani: And how many years old do you need? 20? 30? No problemo, we'll deal with it right now. Clockwork! Come out, your help is needed! Everyone: Dani, no! Dani: Dani, yes! Dan, flying over the city: Do I even want to know?...