#riphenryheimlich

One of my favorite movies.

It didn’t click with me the underlying reasons behind why I liked it until lately, when I went through all this waking up and becoming aware spiritually.

I just thought it was a funny movie, what with all the different ways he tried to get out of the loop, through getting rich, getting caught, getting killed, giving up, getting to know people, trying to help others selfishly, and finally helping himself.

What I realized later is that this exact progression mirrors how we tend to resolve our own purgatory-creating behaviors. We try to cheat, we become the victim, we try the martyr, we try dissociation, we try putting up a front and playing the game, and when that doesn’t make us happier we reach out to ourselves - the real source of our purgatory - to question where it all comes from, and make a change.

Bill Murrays character is a real conceited personality at the beginning, full of snarky platitudes and jabs at other peoples way of life. He believes it makes him strong, independent, clever, attractive, and most of all, successful. We do the same sometimes, believing that the way we push others around and try to get them to join us in our personal quest is something that successful people do, or that it’s a way of surviving or avoiding repeating some great loss. We believe it’s what makes us “us,” and so when others question or push back we take offense. We have identified with these platitudes, these reactions, really, and we believe that these sayings, behaviors, or essentially, the things that we do, are what makes us unique or makes up the whole of who we are as a being in this universe.

But what gets “Phil” out of purgatory isn’t actually some introspective moment, but it’s what I believe to be what wakes him up to his own existence - he realizes that “Rita,” can’t be beaten with just memorizing facts, learning to mimic behaviors, or becoming a poetry quoting Don Juan. What wakes him up is that he realizes that pursuing his own interests and following his own desires is what she expects(and respects). And THEN - he realizes that he was ignoring himself the entire time, and that he was so obsessed with getting out that he forgot to enjoy himself and find things to make Groundhog Day enjoyable for the time that he was there. He allowed himself to relax, take a breath, find what he liked, and even consider sharing the joy he had with someone else, even if it was just for “one” day.

Funny enough, when he finally did it, he broke free from the spell, and moved on through life, awakened to the prison he put himself in, free to enjoy himself wherever and whenever he was.

If YOU feel stuck in a loop, a purgatory, a spell, stop trying to cheat, victimize yourself, be the martyr, dissociate or give up, or go through the motions when you know it’s just not who you are. You’re making your own hell!

Take up ice sculpting, jazz piano, life-saving, soup kitchening, heimliching(RIP),whatever you can to break the monotony and enjoy yourself, even if it’s killing you to stay in one place. Find a way to love yourself, and pay attention to what you like and don’t like. Make a difference in other people's lives, but don’t do it because it looks right, or because you feel you “should.” Do it because it makes you happy.(obviously saving lives is probably a priority even if it doesn’t make you feel good, but I think you can safely assume that I’m talking about people in the same room as you, not talking about joining this or training for that when you really aren’t okay with the pressure)