#rip jonathan

THIS TOOK WAY TOO LONG, IT TOOK ALMOST

A DAY. It crashed THREE times. But anyways,

did this in honors of Valentines Day a bit, and bc

I like Jonavid art♡♡

Yk, | wondered if when David got to Heaven,

Jonathan was already ready to beat the living

soul out of him for what he did to Bathsheba

and Uriah🐱

From Landslide (aka Fine Line but Jonathan's POV)

Alright, lemme introduce you to a project I’ve been working on for a few years now 😘

I have been very dedicated to it, and it’s been through many, MANY changes because of the concept for it, which has been hard for even me to develop and have it make sense lol

Also here’s some art I made for it, hehe

This novel in question is, “The Book of Saul,” a fictional retelling of, well you know, King Saul. But strictly through his perspective and how he sees the world around him, which is shown in a very symbolic way. Everything about this story is symbolic with it presented through symbolic imagery that Saul experiences. Within the story, Saul would go through seven visions, given by Ze’ev, his evil spirit, detailing his state of mind and his gnawing grudges.

Basically, this story brings light to Saul’s mentality in the Bible in other means of interpreting it, in which Saul is honestly never sane and he has a lot of issues lol. Also, the story goes through his entire life, and I mean going back to when he’s around 15, which is where the story starts (other than his traumatic flashback that I’m not going to talk about loll) So it’s an origin story as well, but it ties into the whole idea of what drives Saul forward in the life he lives.

Also, there’s generational trauma 🥶 that explains Saul’s abuse for Jonathan (although there are many more aspects to it, Saul’s past is partly the reason for Saul’s abuse) in which Saul’s father, Kish, is the biggest asshole you’ll ever meet lol. And yeah, there’s a reason why, and yet, he’s an asshole through and through and there’s no redemption for him. Kish doesn’t want to be associated with his son which spirals into endless abuse and neglect (kind of explains why Saul has little to no confidence in himself and is constantly paranoid).

There are also prominent characters I’ve come up with, such as Saul’s mother, Hodesh, and basically the character of Saul’s evil spirit, Ze’ev, who is a shift-shaping demon wolf that guides Saul to seek his truest intentions while bringing fear into his heart so Ze’ev can feed off of him. Firstly, Hodesh holds a special place in Saul’s heart. And it’s to the point where he becomes obsessive of her, trying to find answers through her since she is the bearer of his life (also she sings really well, making it the origin for Saul’s musical needs). Ze’ev, on the other hand, stems from Saul’s traumas/fears and becomes prevalent later on to weaken Saul and to bring him to a place of chaos and terror so much so it hinders Saul seeking for the answers he’s been looking for for all his life.

And some other things about the novel: Saul’s childhood is absolute garbage, yet Ahinoam has always tried to alleviate him from his burdens. His relationship with Ahinoam, however, is at first very, very strong but becomes unstable when Saul’s drama with Rizpah comes into the picture, which is all Saul’s fault by the way lol. Him and Ahinoam though have a strong connection, despite their troubled beginnings with each other, and Jonathan is basically a combination of them in good ways lol. Jonathan is really prominent in the story too, and I’ll maybe make another post discussing David/Jonathan’s relationship in the story, because I’m still trying to figure out a symbolic way to add them into Saul’s narrative.

One thing about Jonathan is that Saul in his visions constantly imagines a scary version of Jonathan, which is supposed to be serious, but I’ve always found it funny loll. Like Saul would be waking up screaming from Jonathan drenched in blood and then sees a perfectly normal Jonathan smiling at him.

So ANYWAYS,

I’ve been working on this novel for a long while, and it has gone through a lot of changes. I have written the first draft for it, but I’ve recently scrapped the entire draft because the whole story has entirely changed lol. The first draft actually dwelled on Saul’s childhood, but the narrative ended up being really pandering and stupid while not adding anything to the story, if I’m being honest 🥶 I mean, there was a chapter of 10k words of just little Saul talking to little Abner about some plan of sneaking out to go and see the Philistines. They’re like 7 btw. You’d spend five chapters of an annoying, 7 year old Saul who thinks he’s tough and brave in every sentence he says loll.

Alright that’s enough rambling 😭 I doubt anyone would read this other than me, but if you have, then you’re amazing and I applaud you greatly 😎👏👏 I ramble a lot because I’m a nerd, and I’m very passionate, and uh- DAVID FOREVERRR 😍😘✨🫶 EEEEEEEEEE