#rinchan rants

I don’t have an obligation to share my experiences.  Meaning that I am free to share my stories whenever and with whomever I want, and—most importantly—feel comfortable sharing them with.

I don’t believe that Tumblr is a safe place for people like me to discuss race and ethnicity.  Namely, people like me being people who have experienced prejudice, but who pass as white.  There’s a lot of gatekeeping (in the psychology definition) on Tumblr; if I started talking about my experience, suddenly I feel like I probably be asked for proof, because I don’t fit the stereotype of people discriminated against.  

Tumblr is fantastic at trying to be inclusive.  Unfortunately, Tumblr is also fantastic at shutting down conversations by discounting people’s opinions.  Instead of discussions, we have witty attacks towards people who genuinely don’t understand (and then they get applauded for that attack, because oh, it was so clever; let me tell you, if you do a clever attack against someone who is trying to understand, I am automatically going to think of you as an asshole, no matter how cute your attack was).  And the best part is, then people complain, because people aren’t understanding.  

Surprise!

The only way that people change their opinions is through discussion.  Why?  Because when people have discussions, they can learn; humans learn by association.  So, if someone who hasn’t been discriminated against tries to bring up a time that they think they were discriminated against, but it’s wrong, guess what?  You don’t freaking attack them; you put it into terms that they can understand.  That they can identify with.

This is why I refuse to reblog anything about racism, sexism, etc; because they rarely end up turning into real discussions, and I don’t agree with that.  

People can understand if you’re creative enough.  Yes, it would be wonderful if the burden of proof fell to those who were ignorant, but you can’t change your views on something you don’t realize is wrong. So, for now, it does fall to us to help people to understand.  Is it unfair?  Absolutely.  But you can’t expect anything to change if you don’t put in some work.

Also, can we stop assuming that everyone is just an asshole or a troll trying to get attention on a post if they’re asking a question that is inherently sexist/racist/transphobic/etc?  Yeah, it feels good to put a troll back in their place, but it’s hardly productive.

As someone who answers asks a lot, here are my guidelines that I ask myself whenever I answer just about anything:

1. Are they really a troll or are they just someone who doesn’t realize that their mindset is unfair?  Remember the burden of proof: you are lucky to have the education necessary to be open-minded.  Some people don’t have access to that.  Think of yourself as a teacher; if you would be humiliated by the answer as a student, don’t fucking say it.  If you shame someone, you have now put them solidly against your cause.

2. Does it matter if they’re a troll?  If it’s only to them, and I am 10000% sure that they’re just trolling, yeah, I’ll respond with a sarcastic comment (#queenofsnark).  If it’s being published, though, I’m more worried about how everyone else is going to take my comment.  By shaming that troll, am I putting out a message of intolerance?  What is that going to accomplish?  Most of the time, the answer is: nothing.  I would only manage to hinder discussion about the topic.  You can scare people into not talking about topics (you want proof?  Read my comments above!).

3. Am I presenting the whole picture?  If I have proof, is it solid?  I consider solid proof to be academic studies in peer-reviewed journals (note: I’m an academic, so this is hardly surprising).  If it’s based off of personal experience, have I explained myself clearly and calmly?  Have I used logos, ethos, and pathos in order to explain why my view is right, as well as pointing out why their view is wrong?  Am I acknowledging their views as well as pointing out the flaws?  Once again: have I done this professionally enough so that it doesn’t shame the recipient?

4. Have I encouraged proper discussion with my response?  Have I related it back to something the recipient can identify with?  Have I pointed out why their analogy is wrong with improvements to it (not just shut it down!)?  If I don’t know how to explain something, have I referred the recipient to someone/something that can?  Have I made my response gentle enough that they feel comfortable asking more questions?  Most of all, have I encouraged them to think about it and come to the same conclusions I have come to myself?  Or am I telling them that their conclusion is wrong without giving them the chance to conceptualize it? 

5.  Finally, have I asserted them (or a group that they identify with) as the cause?  What am I implying?  Does that implication exclude or attack the recipient in any way (note: Tumblr has a lot of unfair stereotypes floating around relating to men, caucasians, certain nationalities, and anyone who is perceived to be in a position of power)?  If there is an attack implied, do I have evidence that the recipient has taken part in anything that I am accusing them of?  Once again, have I shamed anyone (if you haven’t figured it out, this is an important point!)?  

To round this off, let me talk a little bit about my views on race.

I don’t care what race you are.  People say it’s impossible to grow up colorblind, but let me tell you, I have traveled to five of the seven continents in the world (North & South America, Europe, Asia, Africa).  I have lived in four (all except for South America), all when I was a child.  I didn’t have to be taught to be colorblind; I experienced it.  I pass as white, but obviously, I’ve lived places where that is not the majority race.  If you think that white people can’t experience prejudice, you might want to extend your world view and remember that the internet is a place that extends internationally (ahem, Americans [note, I’d point out my own hypocricy here, but the USA is literally the only place I’ve ever lived where people forget that there’s more to the world than them.  It’s still a confounding point of view.]).  

You do not owe me anything.  Back in High School (living in the USA), I had someone take me aside and apologize for Hiroshima and Nagasaki, after hearing that my grandmother died in it.  This sort of thing literally makes me feel sick.  You did not drop that bomb.  You don’t hate Japanese people, and I will assume that until proven otherwise.  I do not walk around with the sins of my ancestors on my back, and I don’t believe you should either.

The media is partially responsible for the racial divisions we have today and the mess that’s being made in relation to them.  I’ll use the Freddie Gray incident in Baltimore (note: I’m living in the UK, reading USA news about it + Tumblr posts, so I don’t consider myself completely educated about it).  There was rioting and looting, leading up to 6 officers being charged.  The investigation was rushed because of the media; misinformation being thrown everywhere, people only seeing the riots in the newspaper, et cetera, et cetera.  For a strong case, as much of the investigation time should be taken as possible in order to make sure that the charges are adequate (neither too light, nor too heavy).

Instead, the charges pressed are ridiculous, and it’s going to take a miracle prosecutor to make them stick.  Yet, if the officers are cleared based on the evidence and the charges, there will be more rioting, despite it being a fair verdict by the jury.  And there will be more allegations of both racism in the department and police brutality.  All because the media made a frenzy with the story that the AG felt responsible to take action in order to stop.