#right-eye

“It’ll all be worth it. You’ll see.”

(set immediately after Fenrir Craft and thus contains spoilers for the entire series)

As he sat on the veranda, His Majesty dozing at his back, Right-Eye took stock of the situation and concluded that it remained entirely untenable.

Immediate catastrophe had been averted--the King of Zephil had been turned away, His Majesty was safe, Right-Eye hadn't been thrown out of the palace or executed for treason--but still, Right-Eye knew his position remained tenuous at best.  It galled him to acknowledge that; what else did he have to do to prove himself?  The tattoo on his left arm was largely unrecognizable now, ink replaced by damage that would soon become scar tissue; Ulysses was dead twice over, once a decade ago and again today by his own proclamation; he had defended His Majesty against Zephil's plot, raised his sword against his own blood brother.  Most importantly, his king wanted him, trusted him, believed in him.

But it wasn't enough.  The fact remained that Right-Eye had been born and raised a prince of Zephil, and if so many people had distrusted him when they didn't know his provenance, then surely they would feel their distrust justified when they learned that his veins carried the royal blood of an enemy nation.

And it wouldn't stay secret, Right-Eye knew that.  Too many people knew, now, and those who didn't would be able to put all the clues together soon enough.  And between the Royal Guard and His Majesty's advisors, there were plenty of people who wanted nothing more than to run Right-Eye out of the country--or run him through with a blade.

Right-Eye wrapped his arms around his knees and took a deep breath.  His Majesty wants me here, he reminded himself, clamping down the anxiety that gnawed a hole in the pit of his stomach.  As long as His Majesty sits on the throne and wishes me to be his right eye, I will remain by his side, and nothing and no one can change that.

"Right-Eye? Have you seen--oh."

"See, I told you he'd be here."

Right-Eye looked over his shoulder and saw Wolfgang standing at the veranda door, Lord Shirogane draped over one shoulder.  "Sorry for barging in," Wolfgang said.  "I knocked, but you didn't answer."

"My apologies," Right-Eye replied.  "I didn't hear you from out here.  How can I help you?"

"I was looking for that idiot," Lord Shirogane announced, nodding at His Majesty.  "Is he asleep?"

Not anymore, Right-Eye thought.  His Majesty hadn't moved, and his breathing remained soft and steady, but he was pressed up against Right-Eye's back, a long line of warmth; when his muscles tensed, Right-Eye could feel it.

"It's been a long day," Right-Eye said apologetically; an understatement if there ever was one.  "I didn't want to wake him."

"Well, at least send him to bed," Wolfgang said, half scolding, half fond.  "If he wakes up with a crick in his neck, he'll make everyone else's lives miserable, you know he will.  He's a pain in the ass like that."  He deposited Lord Shirogane in Right-Eye's lap.  "You need to take care of him, Right-Eye," he said, his expression sober.  "He won't let anyone else even try."

Right-Eye gently gathered up Lord Shirogane.  "I'll do my best."

Wolfgang nodded and turned to leave.  When he reached the door, though, he paused, one hand grasping the doorjamb as though for support.  "Right-Eye," he said, never turning around, "you're going to stay, right?  Stay with him?"

Right-Eye lowered his eyes to Lord Shirogane, who gazed back up at him speculatively.  "Of course," he said, to both of them.  "As long as His Majesty will have me, I will be his right eye."

"Good," Wolfgang said, as thought that was the only thing he had wanted to hear, and he left without another word.

For a few moments, there was silence.  A few seconds of peace and calm.  Then Lord Shirogane said, "Hey," brusque and unyielding, and he thwapped his tail over Right-Eye's shoulder and smacked His Majesty on the back of the head.  "You're a terrible actor."

"Lord Shirogane," Right-Eye said reproachfully.

"What?  I know he's awake."

"Shut up," His Majesty grumbled, and now he was sitting up, no stretching or yawning, not the slightest pretense of sleepiness.  "Can't a man have an hour of peace?"

"Not around here," Lord Shirogane said, far too chipper.  He wriggled out of Right-Eye's hands and up His Majesty's arm, settling around his shoulders like a mantle.  "Did you properly talk things out?  He looks like he's about to run away again."  He glanced slyly at Right-Eye as he spoke.

His Majesty scowled.  "He's not going anywhere," he growled, and then he turned and looked at Right-Eye.  "You're not going anywhere," he repeated.  Right-Eye couldn't tell if it was more question or threat.  His Majesty kept glaring, and Lord Shirogane abandoned subtlety and craned his head to peer at him, too.

Right-Eye averted his gaze; those three eyes staring at him were three too many.  "As long as you want me, Your Majesty," he said, "I'm yours."

His Majesty snorted, unimpressed.  "But?" he asked.

Right-Eye lowered his head.  "But people will ask questions," he said.  "If you thought it was bad before, it will be many times worse now.  Once it gets out who I am--who I was...."  He shook his head.  "There's only so much you can do to protect me, Your Majesty."

"A king's duty is to protect," His Majesty replied.  His voice was disgusted; Right-Eye had to tell himself, more than once, that the disgust wasn't directed at him.  "You're my right eye.  Anyone who still has a problem with that can go fuck themselves."

"It isn't that easy, King," Lord Shirogane said.

His Majesty let out a sound like he wasn't sure whether he wanted to be sick or to shoot someone.  He grabbed Lord Shirogane by the nape of the neck and dragged him down to stare him in the eye.  "Not you, too," he snapped, giving him a disapproving shake.

Lord Shirogane wormed out of His Majesty's grip and inched back up onto his shoulder.  "They're idiots," he said, "but they're idiots who are helping you run the country."

"I'll fire them."

Right-Eye closed his eyes.  "The younger brother of the King of Zephil went undercover as a nameless mercenary, infiltrated the palace, won the king's trust, and began exerting his influence on the king.  Eventually, the king became nothing but a puppet, and the foreign prince effected a purge of the Quatredina government, eliminating everyone who criticized or questioned the king's decision to keep the heir to the Zephil throne as his personal bodyguard and bringing the country one step closer to being overthrown by Zephil."

The story practically wrote itself.  And Right-Eye didn't know how to change the narrative.

"That's absurd," His Majesty snapped.  "You're not working against me.  You're protecting me.  You're my bodyguard.  You would take an arrow for me."

"I would," Right-Eye said softly.  "And yet I’m not the one who did take an arrow."

His Majesty recoiled, his expression stricken.  "That's," he snarled, his voice ablaze, but nothing followed, as though he, too, began to sense the futility of it all.  He turned away, teeth gnashing, and then he let out a sound of utter frustration and braced his forehead against his clasped hands.

"King," Lord Shirogane said, sounding surprised.

Right-Eye's stomach twisted and curdled inside him.  "Your Majesty...."

"You're my right eye," His Majesty muttered.  His shoulders slumped with bone-deep exhaustion.  "I gave up my right eye once.  It was my choice, it was my responsibility, and I won't let anyone else take the blame."  At last he looked up, and Right-Eye's breath caught in his throat, because His Majesty's single pale eye glinted with that absolute refusal to surrender that was part of his blood and his bones.  "But what happens to my other right eye is also my choice and my responsibility, and I'll be damned if I lose my right eye again."

Right-Eye swallowed.  "Your Majesty," he whispered, his voice thick, and found no other words to say.

What had he done to deserve this?  After everything that had happened in his life, how had he earned such unshakeable trust and loyalty?

The moment was shattered when Lord Shirogane spun about, landing his tail square in His Majesty's face.  His Majesty spluttered on a mouthful of fur and scowled, but Lord Shirogane merely huffed, looking at them in turn.  "This is touching and all," he said, sardonic, "but what are you going to do about it?"

"Do about it?" Right-Eye echoed.

"We shouldn't have to do anything about it," His Majesty said crossly.  "It should be a non-issue."

Lord Shirogane smacked him in the face again.

"Do about it," Right-Eye repeated, ruminating over the words.  Now that he thought about it, what had they done about it?  Right-Eye had always tried to stay present but unobtrusive--to remain by His Majesty's side enough for his loyalty to be known, but not let anyone look too closely for fear of what they might see.  His Majesty had not always kept his cool, but he had at times shied away from being too full-throated in his defense of Right-Eye, lest people think the king protest too much.  They had tried to let the evidence of Right-Eye's actions be enough to defend him.  But what had that achieved?  Nearly the entire court and Royal Guard had stood up against him, and that was before his past had been revealed.

"Perhaps we should confront it head-on," Right-Eye said slowly, pondering even as he spoke.

His Majesty raised one eyebrow.  "Meaning?"

"My past is out," Right-Eye said.  "There's no way to unopen that box.  So instead of trying to keep it quiet, we announce it to the world."

His Majesty's draw dropped.  His gaze went incredulous, then sharp.  "You're an idiot."

"We can make a whole production of it," Right-Eye continued, warming to his subject.  "We announce that I was a prince of Zephil, and then I publicly renounce my birthright.  I'll swear a formal oath of fealty.  I'll kneel before you, vow to serve you, pledge my loyalty to you.  My tattoo is mostly unrecognizable by now, I think, but I'll take a brand to burn the rest of it off, and--"

"Enough!"

His Majesty surged to his feet.  Lord Shirogane yelped and clung to his shoulder by the very tips of his claws.  Right-Eye stared up at him, shocked into silence.

"They'll eat you alive," His Majesty snarled.  He clenched his hands into fists so tight they trembled; his voice was so livid it could have sparked a wildfire.  "You'd be throwing yourself to the wolves."

"Hey," Lord Shirogane objected.

"It's not happening," His Majesty spat.  "I won't let you hurt yourself for me, and I won't let you kneel before me.  They've done enough to you as is.  If the choice is to have you humiliate yourself in front of the world, I'd rather throw them out, and fuck the consequences."

Right-Eye stiffened.  "Your Majesty," he said.  He couldn't keep the edge from his voice.

"You aren't even going to hear him out?" Lord Shirogane asked.

"No."  His Majesty tore Lord Shirogane from his shoulder and practically flung him at Right-Eye.  "And you're going to convince him that he's being a fucking idiot, because I'm not listening to this anymore."

And without another word, His Majesty turned and stalked away, his shoulders tense and his footsteps heavy.  He slammed the door behind him with a bang.

In the ensuing silence, Right-Eye felt the tension drain from his body.  He slouched where he sat and let out a heavy sigh.  "I didn't think it would upset him that much," he admitted, settling Lord Shirogane more comfortably in his lap.

Lord Shirogane snorted.  "King isn't exactly known for his composure," he said, "but he has even less of it when it comes to you."

Right-Eye lowered his gaze.  "I'm sorry."

"Wait, wait, why are you apologizing?  I'm sorry!  It's not your fault!"  Lord Shirogane frantically patted Right-Eye's leg with his tail, a gesture that was probably meant to be comforting.  "It's just the idiot being an idiot!"

"The idiot," Right-Eye said, "is my king."

Lord Shirogane deflated.

Right-Eye took a deep breath and collected himself.  Then he picked up Lord Shirogane, lifting him until they were eye-to-eye.  "Do you think it's as bad of an idea as he does?" he asked.

"It's a crazy idea," Lord Shirogane said bluntly.  "And it'd probably blow up in your face.  But it just might work."

It wasn't like anything else had improved Right-Eye's standing in the eyes of the country, so he saw no reason they shouldn't give it a shot.  There was only one problem.  "But he'll never stand for it, will he?" he said, glum and rhetorical.

"You might be able to convince him," Lord Shirogane said doubtfully.

Right-Eye sighed again.  "I know he's trying to protect me," he said, lowering Lord Shirogane onto the bench beside him.  "But I'm his bodyguard.  More than that, I'm his right eye.  He gave me a name, and a place, and a purpose.  A king's purpose may be to protect his country and his people, but my purpose is to protect him."

Lord Shirogane's ears drooped.  "Protecting him as his bodyguard is one thing.  But he doesn't want you lowering yourself for his sake."

"He is my king," Right-Eye said through gritted teeth.  "I would gladly take His Majesty's brand on my arm.  Swearing my loyalty to him in front of the world is no humiliation.  I would be honored to kneel at his feet."

"Kneeling for your king is great and all, but you realize that I'm the important part here, right?" Lord Shirogane asked dryly.  "I'm the reason he's the king, after all."

Right-Eye dredged up a fraction of a smile.  "I would kneel for you too, Lord Shirogane," he said.  "If you wanted me to."

I re-read Start of Darkness and cried my damn eyes out again, so here’s one of the parts I did for my “Contact” MAP. 

You guys... The Order of the Stick is SUCHHH a good comic. Redcloak is horribly tragic and I’m just - uGGgfrebj I’m gonna start crying again

(please read order of the stick!! do it for me. do it for redclooooooak