Ok can somebody please genuinely explain to me what I've done here?
I think this was supposed to be Legend from LU. That's what was in my brain when I started it, but I thought I was going in a completely different direction? But I turned my brain off and just let my muse do whatever and it turned from like, an emotional hunched-over-in-the-darkness thing to this weirdly cropped close-up.
I am learning a lot about myself as I do these random pieces. My artwork (whether traditional or digital) is always very messy. I obsess over any linework I try to do and it ends up taking way longer than my patience has time for. (Is this a dysgraphia thing? I feel like this is a dysgraphia thing.)
What I love doing is blending colors and creating textures! Even shading / rendering is something I find super fun. I'm awful at creating precise shapes, it eats away at my patience and drive like a wood chipper. But blending colors? Making textures? Shading and rendering? That's when I enter my "zone", when I feel the relaxing tug of a creative flow state.
I guess I'm worried that without being able to utilize good drawing / sketching / linework skills, my artwork will never really progress past this really messy hodgepodge of big blocks of colors. I used to draw a lot more when I was younger (sketchy styles have always been my favorite), but my skills never really improved much. I do occasionally still sketch things, but the proportions and shapes are always off, especially once I stop loosely "blocking out" large shapes and try to get the details down.
So um. Yeah I guess I'm just trying to figure out how to move forward without losing drive or it feeling like a chore. I'm also wondering how much of my troubles with sketching is the dysgraphia and how much is just me being a crappy artist. 😕 Can I improve from here with just the skills and inclinations I have, rather than being a slave to a skill I probably have a severe handicap for?
