I have some exams I could be doing right now, but I’m too inspired by the world to sit and study. Often times I’m sitting and wondering what life is going to look like for me. I’m wondering if I’m using my time wisely, and efficiently. I keep waiting for the day where I’ll make up my mind and say, “okay, this is what I want to be, and this is what I’ll do”, but it never really happens because something else always catches my eye. I worry if this is a bad thing. I’m in love with art, of course. But, not just brush strokes on a canvas, which is something that I understand and something that understands me. Everyday I find myself learning more, gaining a wider perspective, opening up my mind to new possibilities in the artistic world. I want to know details like where these colors came from and how they were created, and how they got their name. I want to know how the greatest painters learned, and what their lives were like. I recently have been craving to eventually tell some of my own stories through contemporary dancing, (I kind of do this on the low in my room, amateurly of course, in hopes to find time to join some classes or someone to team up with). I think about the world of photography, and all the people I could meet, and images I could produce, and the stories I could tell through them (which I already have a good lead on). I think about the thrilling and exciting medium of digital filmmaking, which I definitely want to flourish in someday mainly as an actor, but not limiting myself to directing as well (this is something I’ve dreamed of since childhood, and have a good lead on also) Then my mind ventures of into different professions as well.

I’ve recently started watching a Netflix series called Chef’s Table. Never had I put much consideration into being a chef, but I have come to realize how much of an art it is, and all the mysteries and life lessons that food can tell-- How respecting nature, learning from the indigenous people of the land, and how understanding the environment on a deeper level produces sensational food that tells a story. A story about people, and a story about what I believe to be God’s highly intricate, unfathomable creation. I don’t see myself as a chef, but I totally respect the art and have this new understanding that I didn’t have before. Although, I remember telling myself, “when I’m about thirty years old, I’ll venture off more into the world of food,” I can’t wait to explore and travel to these new areas, and have a new experience with food and culture. I also want to enhance my own eating lifestyle asap.

People keep telling me that I must be a Renaissance man, which I was first called by my drama teacher in my high school theatre class  (that I very much enjoyed). I didn’t really know what it meant at first, but I knew that it must have been a favorable title. Now that I understand it, I think it suits me. I’ve feared for a long time, that growing up meant choosing a job and simply doing that one thing for the rest of your life. But I don’t want to be put into a box. There’s too much to explore, too many people to meet, too many stories to tell, too much life to live, too many different experiences to have, too much to learn, too much love to give, and not enough time. This world is vast, and filled with depths of the unknown. Of course, I won’t get to experience everything, but I want to do what I’m capable of doing.