#remarrying

There is a famous fairytale. A kindhearted girl whose father and stepmother got married and became a family of five with her two stepsisters. The poor girl who was condemned by her stepmother and stepsisters when her father died. The very fairytale, Cinderella.

But I am not Cinderella, I am the stepmother.

At the age of thirty-seven, already married twice, been widowed twice and is raising three daughters!

Daniel Walford, a man who keeps approaching me while I’m busy trying to raise my three daughters.

“Can I kiss you?”

As a son-in law, I think he’s a little bit older but why does he keep approaching?… Oh, I don’t know.

Once I let Cinderella marry the prince, I can live quietly.

You're very welcome!!

Remarrying in that case is treated differently.

There is a kind of mourning period. A time to gather oneself, reflect, regain equilibrium and - most importantly - to mourn. It lastsone year and a day and it's considered very bad taste to marry again during that time. (Also asking for misfortune.)

If one is found to have a sexual relationship with someone during their mourning period, that is not frowned upon. Though people will talk if this happens before the funeral.

So, if you're a widow/widower/someone mourning their spouse, society gives you a year before you need to participate in societal things again (and receive help if needed). In those things included are romantic relationships, but not sexual ones. (Galahkari society makes a difference between romantic and sexual relationships.)

Infp: Random question. If your parents divorce and you dad remarries, that woman is your step mom, right? But what if your dad dies and your step mom remarries. Does that man become your step step dad?

If a couple decides to get a divorce, it's easy and complicated at the same time.

The couple goes to their Clan Head and announces their intention. If there are no aggravating circumstances, there will be a trial period during which the Arra get involved to deal with the paperwork and it's decided how the wealth gets devided.

Each person takes back what they brought into the marriage, and everything added to it while married normally gets devided 50/50. If there is dispute over it, the Clan's Mediator handles it.

Children usually follow the mother. If they already completed their First Hunt or are older than 14, they can decide where they want to live.

All of that takes around a year.

Of course this is the best case scenario in which a couple separates on relative amiable terms.

During the older times there was a bit of a stigma involved with remarrying. Along the lines of: If you divorced, how can you guarantee you will love and cherish your now spouse? But that sentiment has mellowed out quite a bit, though there will always be people who will give someone sideways glances, if they learn that person has been married more than once.

(I feel like I have to add that arranged marriages were pretty rare. The main focus has always been on how well people fit together.)