#religiousocd

Writing is really fun. Personally, I prefer writing fiction, writing my feelings out directly is too scary. I don’t want people to judge me so directly. I’ve been watching lots of different shows and movies as well as playing lots of video games for inspiration and entertainment. Something I often have trouble with is depictions of demons and hell in media. It’s hard to explain, and my religious OCD (scrupulosity) says my words on the subject are blasphemous, but it’s kind of like a weird form of exposure therapy for my scrupulosity in some instances. It normally is positive but there are times when I’ll watch things and my scrupulosity will start acting up as a result. Like there’s this game called Sex Advice Succubus that’s like really wholesome even tho it takes place in the “Netherworld” and has demons in it. There’s lots of really meaningful stuff in that and using demons and hell in media is another way people express themselves. As a Christian transfem, it comes off as a little concerning to me, but I realize the meaning and purpose of these works. There’s different interpretations of everything and there’s a beauty in that.

"It is ever the Holy Spirit's work to turn our eyes away from self to Jesus; but Satan's work is just the opposite of this, for he is constantly trying to make us regard ourselves instead of Christ. He insinuates, "Your sins are too great for pardon; you have no faith; you do not repent enough; you will never be able to continue to the end; you have not the joy of his children; you have such a wavering hold of Jesus." All these are thoughts about self, and we shall never find comfort or assurance by looking within. But the Holy Spirit turns our eyes entirely away from self: he tells us that we are nothing, but that "Christ is all in all." Remember, therefore, it is not thy hold of Christ that saves thee--it is Christ; it is not thy joy in Christ that saves thee--it is Christ; it is not even faith in Christ, though that be the instrument--it is Christ's blood and merits; therefore, look not so much to thy hand with which thou art grasping Christ, as to Christ; look not to thy hope, but to Jesus, the source of thy hope; look not to thy faith, but to Jesus, the author and finisher of thy faith. We shall never find happiness by looking at our prayers, our doings, or our feelings; it is what Jesus is, not what we are, that gives rest to the soul. If we would at once overcome Satan and have peace with God, it must be by "looking unto Jesus." Keep thine eye simply on him; let his death, his sufferings, his merits, his glories, his intercession, be fresh upon thy mind; when thou wakest in the morning look to him; when thou liest down at night look to him. Oh! let not thy hopes or fears come between thee and Jesus; follow hard after him, and he will never fail thee. "My hope is built on nothing less Than Jesus' blood and righteousness: I dare not trust the sweetest frame, But wholly lean on Jesus' name." -Charles Spurgeon