You guys may have noticed I’ve bounced back into the Bendy fandom. I have a few favourite characters there too, and it’s not just Henry and Bendy-it’s Wally Franks. Wally the lazy-ass prick who only does his job when forced and bitches about everything. Wally who everyone headcanons drove Sammy up the wall because he lost his keys one too many times. I adore that man So naturally my brain stuck them together. And over the course of three-four days, the decision resulted in the creation of...These. TL;DR: What happens when you stick an over-eager broom and bitchy janitor together with no rhyme or reason

Wally: Mistah Drew...That's a broom. Gotta Sweep: LOOKS LIKE IT'S SWEEPIN' TIIIIIME!! Wally: A talking broom. That's it, I'm outta here- Wally, regretting his decision to bring the stupid broom home: Gotta Sweep, or whatevah yer name is, it's 1 AM! Lemme sleep! GS: GOTTA SWEEP, SWEEP, SWEEP! Wally: LET ME SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP!! Wally: Dis broom sweeps floors bettah than a vacuum and 'es now my best friend.

Wally: Whatevah ya do, don't open dat door. Tom: Why? What's behind it? Tom: *opens GS' storage door* GS: LOOKS LIKE IT'S SWEEPIN' TIIIIIIIIME!! Tom: Wally: Wally: Run.

Allison: Your stupid sentient broom almost knocked me down yesterday! Allison: I demand an explanation for why he hit on me after! Wally: Long story short-he likes ya. Allison: HE'S A BROOM! Sammy: I have the same nightmares every night. Something tall and dark stalks me through these halls, expression unreadable, and when it catches up, it says- GS, sweeping by the doorway: GOTTA SWEEP, SWEEP, SWEEP! Sammy: Oh fuck, it's found me- Wally: Th' stupid broom swept through a pile 'a ink and streaked it all th' way down every hall. Wally: I dunno whether to laugh or cry.

Wally: 'E works harder than I do, 'e's dedicated and ya ain't even payin' him! Joey: No, Wally, he's not getting your office so you can move into Henry's old one. Sammy: Can someone PLEASE tell me WHY there was a BUILDING'S AMOUNT OF DIRT in my office?! GS: … Wally: Tell me ya didn't take my "clod of dirt" rant seriously. GS, somewhat nervously: LOOKS LIKE IT'S SWEEPIN' TIIIIIME!! Tom: Can I please have ONE serious meeting without you two blowing up a pipe or SHOUTING at me? Wally: Considerin' the fact that Gotta only speaks in shouts...No. Wally: Am I a genius, or what? GS: GOTTA SWEEP, SWEEP, SWEEP! Wally: I dunno if that's a no or an insult but I'm offended get outta my office b’fore I break you over the desk

"Thank you, Logan!" Patton almost lunged across the table to hug him, then thought better of it and went around it. Logan patted his back in return, distracted by his phone. Patton's mind instantly wandered back to his gothic friend as he walked back to his chair. Virgil had struck him as odd ever since he made friends with him last month-soft spoken, quiet in nature, mostly spoke with his eyes. If Patton was honest, the boy was adorable, and he really really REALLY wanted to hug him and show him the appreciation! But Logan had said he had to work up to hugs with him. Fair. Logan's soft sudden intake of breath caught Patton's attention. "Logan?" He asked, reaching across his family's kitchen table to take his friend's hand. "Are you alright?" Instead of answering, Logan suddenly started packing up his stuff. "We'll continue this lesson over voice chat," he said, his voice hiding a sense of urgency. "I have to go. Now." "But why?" Patton stood to help Logan with his stuff, backing off when the teen waved him away. Logan paused when his bag was full, then his shoulders fell and he looked up at Patton. "I...May need your assistance." "Anything you need, I'll help!" Patton chirped. His friend smiled slightly, briefly tapped away on his phone, then left it on the table as he headed to the kitchen. Patton couldn't help snooping, but Logan never left his phone alone like this. He must have left it on in plain sight for a reason. Glancing over his shoulder, Patton picked up the phone. It displayed a series of texts between Logan and Virgil-the latter of who was evidently atrocious at typing. Careful not to scroll up too much-he didn't want to invade any more of Logan's privacy-he read the texts already on screen.

L: She's asleep? V: i think so L: I'm on my way. V: thx lo L: Change of plans. Come to Patton's house. V: ok?

Patton put the phone down as quietly as possible. Who was "she"? Where was Logan going? Why did he want to wait until "she" was asleep? Was Virgil safe? Was he at a bad friend's house? But Patton was pretty sure Virgil didn't have a friend with the pronouns she/her. Unless he was talking about Remy? But why would he want to leave her place? Besides, Remy was they/them today. Unless they changed their mind? Or Patton read the necklace wrong? Green tag means they/them, right? The pastel punk's head spun with worry, causing an ache in his chest. He saw Logan enter the room again and forced a smile... Only for it to fall again when he saw Virgil. "Virge...?" He asked weakly. The goth punk shared a look with his friend, who nodded. He took a deep breath. "Hey...Patt..." He mumbled. "Virgil what the heck happened you look like you got hit by a rogue tree look at you eye!!" Patton rushed over to his friend, carefully taking his chin and brushing purple-dyed hair aside to see the bluey-black mark over his friend's eye. The ache in Patton's chest bloomed to a squeeze. "What happened??" He asked, looking from Virgil to Logan. Virgil grit his teeth, taking Patton's hand and easing it off his chin. "It's fine, I just...Wasn't looking where I was going...Ran into a tree." If there was one thing Patton was good at, it was reading lies. Living with a little brother made him fairly proficient at it. He stared down Virgil, making the goth punk wilt under the shorter teen's glare. "Really," Patton said. "A tree that's female, I presume." Logan flinched. Virgil shot him a glare and the two seemed to have a non-verbal chat before turning back to Patton. "I, uh...Didn't want mom to worry...So I tried heading to Logan's first. But he'd said he was here, so..." Patton glared at Virgil. Virgil stared back. That was his story, and he was sticking with it. The pastel punk knew when he was beaten and raised his hands in surrender. "Alright...Come with me. I'll show you where the cold presses are." The goth punk followed agreeably, sitting on Patton's kitchen counter as the latter fished around his family's freezer for an ice pack. The taller punk seemed more relaxed than earlier, playing with his sleeves and humming a tune to himself. Patton smiled slightly, maybe Virgil's situation wasn't as bad as he originally thought? He closed the fridge, put the ice pack to the side and took Virgil's hands in his. "How're you feeling, kiddo?" Virgil paused. Patton watched fear, anger and sadness flash through his eyes before they returned to neutral. "Okay, I guess," he mumbled. "Eye still hurts. Ice pack?" "Oh! Right!" Patton grabbed it off the counter next to him, pressing it to the goth punk's black eye carefully. Virgil managed a small smile, bringing his hand up to hold it there carefully. Patton grinned. Progress! Logan decided to put a stop to Patton's math tutoring session (score), claiming that Virgil-sorry, movies were more important at the moment. Patton instantly dragged out enough blankets to make a fort with and the three curled up on his couch to watch some Doctor Who. Patton often looked over at Virgil and Logan, their hands naturally resting together-Logan's on top of Virgil's. The goth punk had his head on Logan's shoulder, making snarky comments about the show they were watching and Logan shooting him down each time. They soon dragged Patton into their arguments, which continued until the three fell asleep.

Thomas leaned against the back of the couch. The news channel was playing one of Prince Charging’s heroic antics. He smiled slightly and rested his chin in his hand. “He’s amazing, isn’t he.” Roman scoffed. “Not according to some people.” “Excuse me?” Roman glared at the TV screen. Thomas walked around the couch to sit beside him. “Okay. What’s wrong. You’d think you’d be in awe of this guy!” Roman leaned his head back against the couch. Thomas grabbed the remote control and turned up the volume. “…was said to have hurt three people,” the reporter was saying. “The two men at the scene report that they witnessed everything and called the police. By the time units arrived Prince Charging was already gone.” Roman muttered something under his breath. The reporter went on: “we got contacted by a member of an unknown group, who has told us they are working to put the superpowered man behind bars.” “But why?!” Roman startled Thomas by suddenly yelling. “What did I ever do to them?!” Thomas muted the TV and turned to Roman. “You’re Prince Charging?” Roman draped an arm over his head and groaned. Thomas bit his lower lip in thought before putting his hand on Roman’s leg. “Hey.” A green eye appeared, still tinged in red. Thomas smiled reassuringly. “It’s not the first time they’ve threatened this, remember? You’ll be fine.” Another groan. The eye got hidden again. ‘What am I supposed to say to him?’ “I never wanted to hurt anyone…” Roman’s voice was soft. “He attacked me first, it’s not my fault she ran away…Maybe she shouldn’t have called for help…” “Roman…” He almost didn’t want to ask. “What did you do?” Roman shrugged. “Normal night. Was doing some rounds. Heard a woman scream for help. Rushed to her. She was being mugged. She ran off as soon as I freed her. They cornered me. What was I supposed to do?” His voice caught at the end. Thomas turned back to the TV and watched the scene switch to a grizzled man with a microphone. “Local man calls Charging a “menace”,” the scrolling words at the bottom read. Thomas couldn’t help but bristle at the words. Roman braves the streets almost every night, screws up once and suddenly everyone’s against him? Because he hurt someone in self defense! Good deeds really do get punished. Venting these frustrated thoughts to Roman would just make him feel worse. Thomas chose a different tactic. “It’s probably going to blow over. You know that, right?” Thomas nudged Roman gently, getting his attention again. “Tomorrow they’ll probably be reporting something else. No one knows your real identity anyways; you aren’t going to get harassed.” “No.” Roman sniffed. “It’s not about that.” “Okay, so they’ll be unhappy that you hurt a few people. But you know what—” “I scarred a man, Thomas.” Thomas fell silent. Roman’s single unhidden green eye shone with guilty tears. “I didn’t want to, he grabbed me—what was I supposed to do, lie down and take it? What kind of hero would I be if I did that?!” Silence fell. Thomas unmuted the TV as the interview with the grizzled man looped. The sound of the man’s voice alone made Thomas grit his teeth. “It was only a matter of time,” the man said. “Now that he’s gotten a taste for blood he’s probably gonna try to do it again. He’s a fuckin’ menace.” “Many people agree with the statements Mr. Turner made,” the reporter’s voice piped in. “More people have since joined the movement against Charging. There is some worry about what the hero will do next, or if he will stay hidden.” That’s it. No worry for Charging himself, no comment on the witnesses, no word of if they knew it was self defense or not. ‘It’s a wonder they called him a hero at all!’ Thomas threw the remote onto the coffee table, protectiveness of his dramatic friend starting to burn in his chest. Roman’s strangled whimper only sealed the deal. “They’re wrong, Roman.” Thomas’ own voice almost scared him. “There’s still people that are with you. Sam and Sammy still support you. They’re still trying to help you. I’m sure this is just a vocal minority—” “It’s a fucking BIG minority!” Roman lunged foreword, grabbing the remote and flipping through some channels. Thomas saw the same man’s interview three times before he grabbed Roman’s sleeve to stop him. The TV stopped on a more local news channel. The reporter—a girl in her late 30’s—seemed the most up-beat…Because they had found security footage. “It took some digging, but the attack on Charging was recorded by a security camera!” She practically cheered. “We’re hoping we can send it out to other news channels and clear Charging’s name. Our courts say if push comes to shove they will file it away with other found evidence that Charging was the attacked, not the attacker.” Thomas let go of Roman’s arm. Roman dropped the remote control and hugged himself. Thomas couldn’t help smiling (albeit worriedly) and wrapping his arms around his heroic friend. It took a few moments before Roman returned the hug.

Patton came home and found they hadn’t moved much. At first glance he thought they’d fallen asleep until Roman lifted his head to say hi. Thomas and Roman both kept the slandering news reports a secret between them. The news slowly turned to his favour as the security footage got out. Sam and Sammy stepped up their efforts to protect their favourite hero and prevent him from ever being cornered and/or wrongfully blamed again. Almost everyone is relieved to hear the hero is back on the streets a week afterwards. Charging is the city’s crowning jewel, after all.

Egon Spengler: Logan - Picture a Logince fusion that’s mostly controlled/led by Logan - The science behind ghosts has been his hyperfixation for y e a r s - He’s also been wanting to be a scientist for years so being a Ghostbuster is like a dream job to him - Used to be an English college professor until Patton roped him into hunting a ghost with him. He’s still not sure how he even met him (though it’s not impossible that Patton just walked up to him and said “Hi I’m Patton do you want to hunt a ghost with me?”) - “Might have Autism. Might not have a soul. We aren’t sure yet“ -quote from Roman - The brains behind the whole thing. He made the siren, the alarm, the proton packs, everything - Remy (Janine) has feelings for him and he Does Not Appreciate It - Did indeed try to drill a hole in his skull. He wanted to make essentially an early version of Bluetooth. Got as far as putting the drill to his head and finding out the thing’s battery had died. Roman was not amused when he asked him for more - This is going to just turn into Egon headcanons if I don’t stop

Ray Stanz: Patton - Has Autism, is lOUD AS FUCK - Has been kicked out of several libraries for this - Eye contact is a no-no. He won’t freak but he will get very nervous - He introduced Logan to Roman, was dismayed when they didn’t get along at first - Basically a little kid with a laser-shooting gun - Main cause of most of the damage at ghost busts - Roman looks up to him a LOT, even though he’s older (but he’d never say that out loud) - Is allergic to everything with fur - Feels pretty bad whenever they have to bust a ghost with a tragic past - Had been begging Logan to let them have some kind of mascot. Logan finally relented and built a kind of cage in the front office for Slimer - (Remy doesn’t appreciate having that thing watching him every day with it’s beady little eyes) - Loves getting covered with whatever crap ghosts may spew at them-slim, ectoplasm, anything. It doesn’t feel sticky to him, more soft like water-hence why he thought it was “so cool” when Roman got slimed. Besides the physical contact thing - Fiercely protective of Virgil (Winston). Heaven help whatever soul that’s dumb enough to taunt that man in his presence because Patton will grab them-with his hands or his proton gun’s stream-and throw them against the most solid thing he can aim for (which has included teammates. Logan was not impressed)

Winston Zeddemore: Virgil - Wanted to be a necromancer when he was a kid, now just wants a job - Trigger-happy when nervous/frightened, causes the second-most amount of damage during busts - Stupidly tried hiding his anxiety from the others at first, writing off any moments of panic as “just paranoia”, “just got startled”, etc. It takes a particularly nasty ghost putting him out of commission via panic attack that he finally opens up to them - Initially wrote off his anxiety out of worry they’d either A. not hire him/fire him or B. treat him like he was made of glass. B almost happened until Logan took his side when Patton was barring him from coming on a bust - Patton and Logan argued viciously over who was in charge of teaching him how to work the proton packs and guns. Virgil was confused as to why they both can’t do it until Roman told him they’re pretty much arguing over who adopts him - (Patton won that battle on the grounds that Logan gets to teach their next employee. Sadly for Logan no one else has taken up the job) - He fucking HATES getting covered in ghost gunk - Some captured ghosts have learned to fear him, he’s pretty scary when he learns their patterns - (I was going to make him a ghost that gets attached to Patton, but...Nah. Four Sides, four Ghostbusters)

Janine Melnitz: Remy - Only took the job because of Logan, likes to call him “Resident Eye Candy” - Logan can not stand him. At all. Remy’s really up front with how he feels about Logan and he finds it over-bearing - He’d wear a skirt if the boys don’t stop him. Hell he’d wear a crop top if they don’t stop him. (They always do. Buggar.) - If he doesn’t have a coffee at any time in the morning he’s a real bastard to whoever gets within 2 feet of him - Roman thinks this is hilarious and will sometimes withhold his coffee order to hear him cuss out people on the phone. He finds it less hilarious when someone tries to sue them for verbal abuse - Patton thought he was blind at first because he always wears sunglasses (”LOGAN WE CAN’T HIRE A BLIND MAN TO TAKE CALLS”)

Dana Barett: Deceit - Trans ftm - “Deceit” is more of a nickname for him, but he’s so used to it that he’s considering making it his legal name - Told off Logan when they first met because he misgendered him four times (the first time was an accident, the second time was a slip up, the last two started seeming intentional) - Legal name is still Dana, he hasn’t have the money or the time to change it yet-which is infuriating - Has heterochromia (left eye brown, right eye green) and vitiligo - Roman thinks he’s drop dead beautiful, Deceit thinks he’s just annoying. Despite this he happily goes on a few flings with him and enjoys the pampering - They don’t officially “get together”, but Roman stops skipping work to take “clients” out on dates, so the other ‘busters are happy - Roman absolutely will tell anyone who listens to him long enough how gorgeous Dee is. Virgil has told Dee about this. Snake man is equal parts flattered and frustrated - Speaking of snakes, he gets two after the Gozer incident: Zuul (female Ball Python) and Vinz (male Corn Snake) - Why he named them after demon dogs is beyond him but he couldn’t think of better names for them

- Sean would do the exact same thing while making the most inappropriate jokes, embarrassing the shit out of whoever was with him

- Hosea will emotionally adopt every hard-done-by kid he lays eyes on and tries to take them to his and Dutch’s mansion

- “Dutch we have a daughter now-” “DEAR WE ONLY HAVE SO MUCH SPACE YOU REALLY NEED TO STOP THIS”

- Honestly he lets Hosea bring one scruffy banged-up kid in and suddenly he’s adopting everyone under the sun

- NEVERMIND THE FACT IT WAS HIS IDEA ALSO TO ADOPT ARTHUR IT DOESN’T MATTER

- (Remember, Dutch is a hypocrite)

- Yes, they have a mansion. Yes, the younger members of the gang live there. Yes, Dutch gets into trouble with the police so often they have people out to get him. Hosea is exasperated

- No one knows where Dutch works or what he even does when no one is around but he’s rich as fuck

- The other gang members have specific jobs: Grimshaw is a high school teacher, Mary-Beth is a grade-school teacher, Karen is...Well, guess

- Molly works retail and hates everyone there but no one else will take her, Tilly is a lawyer (and Hosea is so goddamn proud of her)

- Sean’s too much of a chatty dumbass to have a job for longer than a month, he annoys the living shit out of his boss until they fire him

- some might argue this is intentional. More time unemployed means more time with Karen after all ;)

- The others don’t talk about where they work unless it’s to bitch about it because modern jobs are shit (NO I’M NOT SALTY BECAUSE THE JOB SYSTEM SCREWED ME OVER WHAT)

- Kieran is Kieran. Massive horse lover. Wants to work at a stable. Sucks for him there’s none around but there’s a private one nearby so he can see their horses in their pasture

Deceit and Remus weren’t that far away from him. They were sleeping too—Deceit’s hand resting over Remus’, the duke’s head on his shoulder. They were apparently close enough that the cold night air didn’t bother Remus, what with him still being shirtless.

“Logan?” I snapped to attention. Logan; sitting not far from me; did as well, looking up as Patton walked over to him and joined him by the fire. “Greetings, Patton,” Logan greeted my morality. “Can you not sleep?” “I don’t think I can,” Patton said. “Being the heart, and all. You know how it works—if the heart sleeps…” “The human doesn’t wake up,” Logan finished. “But you are no longer part of Thomas. You should try to sleep, it’s crucial for your body.” “I’ll be okay,” Patton said with a shrug. “My question is: why are you awake?” Logan looked away. Patton put his hand on his shoulder and dropped his voice to a whisper. I quietly moved a bit closer so I could hear them and caught the tail end of what Logan was saying. “…water.” “You’re still worried about looking for water, huh,” Patton said, a smile in his voice. “I’m worried about all of us, Patton.” Logan ran his fingers through his hair, a worried edge to his voice. “If we don’t drink water, we will die.” “I’m sure a ship will come by—” “When?” Patton didn’t answer. I couldn’t blame him. Logan had a point, after all: if a ship came by, would it be soon enough? Logan was talking again. “I’m not watching you or Thomas die of dehydration because we’re on the wrong side of the world.” “Lolo…” Patton paused as if to think. “We won’t die of dehydration.” “Not if I have a say in it, no,” Logan agreed. Patton stifled a laugh. “Even if you don’t, Lo. We’re surrounded by water, we’ll be fine!” “Water that we cannot drink.” Logan seemed to take off his glasses. Patton put one hand on his hip. “Says who?” He challenged. “Says Remus,” Logan answered matter-of-factly. “If he won’t drink it, I will not allow you to.” Remus sleepily groaned at the mention of his name. Patton and Logan fell silent for a spell until they were sure he was still asleep. “Look at them…” Patton cooed, his voice soft. “We just got here, and they’ve already buddied up.” “Everyone here has.” Logan pointed to Roman. “Roman and Virgil, for example. Thomas and I. Everyone has a buddy except…” Except Patton. The name hung in the air uncomfortably. “I’m scared, Lo,” Patton spoke in a small voice I had to strain my ears to hear. “What if we never go home? What if we decide we don’t want to?” “Preposterous.” The light from the fire reflected off Logan’s eyes as he turned to Patton. “Everyone wants to go home. Virgil does, Roman does, even Deceit and Remus do.” “Do you?” Patton wanted to know. Logan hesitated. “I want to make sure everyone is safe.” Patton sighed. His head landed on Logan’s shoulder. There was maybe a second’s pause before Logan shifted his weight to his other hand and started rubbing Patton’s back. They sat like that for a while, logic and morality taking comfort in each other’s presence. I think I was starting to drift off when Patton suddenly lifted his head. “I’m going to get Roman to bed,” he said quietly. “You should sleep too, Lolo. We can talk more in the morning.” Logan nodded. Patton smiled and patted his shoulder, standing up and walking over to gently nudge Roman awake. Logan didn’t move from his spot beside the fire. I debated over going over to talk to him, but…No. Patton’s given him enough to think about. Might as well go back to sleep. I turned around to scootch back to my sleeping spot and saw a vague shape of purple. It seems Virgil decided to snuggle up to me while Roman was on fire duty. I smile softly and made my way back over to him. He opened his eyes blearily. “Thomas…?” “It’s just me, bud. Go back to sleep,” I told him. He nodded and pulled me tightly against him, closing his eyes again. I wanted to keep watching Logan all night, but Virgil’s rhythmic breathing lulled me back to sleep.