#rayper

Ben sighed, clutching his kazoo as he heard the cheering of fans on the stage. Alex walked behind him, clapping him on the back with his open hand. “You’re gonna do great, bro.” He promised, trying to help him calm his nerves.

“What if the fans don’t like me? I mean, you guys have been together for so long…” He murmured self-consciously.

Alex shrugged. “The fans will like you. We like you, ergo…” He trailed off, not entirely sure how to end a sentence after using the word ‘ergo.’

“Yeah, just remember tonight, make sure the chicks are 18 before you bring ‘em in bed.” Jack reminded him, giving him a good natured punch on the shoulder.

Ben glared. “I have Kaitlyn, remember?”

“Yeah? And when was the last time you talked to that broad?” Jack questioned, strumming on his unplugged electric guitar and practically vibrating in anticipation of the upcoming concert.

Ben looked down. “A couple months.” He bent down to retie a one of his shoelaces. “We’re taking a break.”

“Yeah, and I’m sure she’s having loads of fun fucking other guys.” One of the other, nameless members said.

“Hey guys? They’re ready for you onstage.” A girl with a headset on popped her head into the room. “If you’ll just follow me…”

“Alrighty, sweetheart.” Jack said with a wink, hurrying to her side so he could flirt with her on the short walk to the stage.

Ben dragged his feet, falling behind. His first concert with All Time Low. If someone had told him five months ago that he would be playing his kazoo onstage alongside All Time Low, he would have laughed in their face.

No one thought he could do it, and yet here he was, playing with one of the most popular punk-pop bands in the nation- practically kings of their genre. It was equal parts surreal and nerve-wracking.

“You’re awesome, dude. They’re gonna love you.” Rian said quietly to them as they stood just offstage, waiting for their opening act to finish up.

“Yeah, just don’t fuck up and you’ll be fine.” Jack teased.

“Prick.” Ben huffed under his breath, annoyed with his vulgar bandmate.

They finally made their way onstage and as soon as they stepped out, Ben nearly went deaf from the sound of high-pitched screams. Ben watched, mesmerized, as they worked the crowd like veterans, cracking jokes with ease. He stayed in the background for the majority of the concert, playing his songs but keeping quiet, energized yet intimidated.

Ben blew hard into his kazoo for the final measures of “Lullabies,” smiling as a final cheer rose up in the crowd. This was a cheap buzz, for sure.

“Whew!” Alex said, bouncing up and down, the adrenaline still pumping. “Signing time? Signing time!” He made a whooping motion with his fist and took off down the hall without waiting for directions from the girl in the headset. Jack followed with equal enthusiasm.

Headset-girl looked in his direction, appearing a bit stunned, but she seemed to catch herself, shaking her head with a smirk. “This way.” She directed what was remaining of the band down the hallway, the opposite way that Jack and Alex had run down.

“Should we go…?” Ben started to ask, only to be cut off by one of the nameless ones.

“Nah, they’ll find their way back eventually. Cause you know once they show up it’ll just be the Jack and Alex show and their won’t be any fans for us. Let ‘em wander for a while.”

Ben just shrugged and followed the others. Sure enough, the fans flooded in for the first twenty minutes, bombarding the three of them with posters and pens and iPhones for instagram pictures. Then Alex and Jack walked in, and the attention of the mass of teenage girls shifted, and they were pushed to the side in favor of more important band members.

A few stragglers remained, including a shy-looking girl that Ben smiled at and tried to subliminally beckon over for an autograph. It seemed to work, because she approached. “Hey, what’s your name?” He asked, uncapping his sharpie in preparation.

She mumbled something unintelligible under her breath. “Uh, what? Didn’t catch that.”

He glanced to his side for a second to see Jack wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. He grabbed a blank piece of paper and scribbled something on it, holding it up for Ben to see.

18? It read.

Ben clenched his jaw and looked away, annoyed. “Anita.” The girl said, raising an eyebrow at him.

“What?” He asked, distracted.

“My name is Anita.”

“Oh, right, right. So, um, hope you enjoyed the show.” He scribbled her name on the poster, writing his practiced signature below it.

“Yeah, whatever.” All traces of shyness were gone. The girl was just pissed off now. “Frankly, I’ve been to shows before, and I liked the band better without a kazoo player.” She snatched her poster back and walked away, going to stand in Alex’s massive signing line instead.

Ben’s mouth popped open at her forwardness, a little hurt by the comment. His phone dinged and he looked down at it out of reflex.

Hey, I know you’re at your show right now, but when you get a chance, go look at Kaitlyn’s Facebook page. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you. A text from his old friend, Kelsey lit up the screen.

His interest piqued, he pulled up her Facebook. He was glad for the fact that he was sitting down, because if he wasn’t he would surely have collapsed. Her profile picture, which had previously been a less-than-flattering duckface selfie, was now a picture of her, practically hanging all over some other guy.

A closer inspection revealed that it wasn’t just some other guy… it was Alexxx, one of Ben’s friends from his old high school. Feeling sick, he got up out of his chair, wishing for once that he smoked so he could have an excuse to leave. No one noticed him going, too preoccupied with the signing.

He sat in an empty corner backstage, just taking deep breaths and trying to convince himself that he had made the right decisions in life.

“Mr. Francis!” It was headset-girl, she looked startled. “I- sorry. I didn’t see you there.”

“S’alright.” He responded, sounding as glum as he felt.

“Are you okay? Can I get you anything, sir?” She asked, looking nervous.

 His face twisted into a scowl. “Yeah, you can stop calling me sir. It’s just Ben.” He looked up at her, realizing for the first time that she was actually quite pretty.

“Oh, okay… Ben.” She hedged, trying to decide whether she should talk to the obviously distraught boy in the corner or continue doing her job. He just kept looking up at her with those moody eyes though, so what was she supposed to do?

“I’m uh, Jenna.” She said, taking off her headset and sitting down next to him, hesitating for a moment, awaiting his approval.

“How long have you worked here?” He questioned, eager to get his mind off of recent events.

“Longer than you.” She dead-panned.

He laughed. Pretty and funny. “Too true. The fans will probably like you more than they like me at this point.” He sighed, becoming melancholy again.

“That’s not true.” Jenna consoled, instinctively resting a comforting hand on his shoulder, only to have it flitter away as soon as she realized what she had done. “They just don’t know you yet. Give it time.”

“I guess so.” He looked back at her, smiling at her kind words.

“And no offense, hiding backstage during a signing doesn’t exactly seem like the best way to win their affections.”

“Oh, right.”

“Yeah. You know where it is, right?” She asked, getting back up and dusting off her jeans while putting the headset back on.

“Uh-huh. Just down this way?”

“You got it.”

“And Jenna?” He said right before she turned away.

“Hm?”

“You’ll be at the next show, right?” He was doing that thing with his eyes again and she couldn’t stand it.

“Umm- y-yeah.” She sounded like an invalid to her own ears.

“I’ll see you soon, then.”

“Because I’m in love with you.”

Silence.

Dead silence.

Ben refused to make eye contact with Jenna. He was sure he had ruined their friendship for good now. “Are you going to say anything?” He whispered to her, almost fearful.

She merely stared at the floor, at a loss for words. “I… I’m sorry. I should go.” She decided, standing up suddenly. Honestly, the fact that he was hurt barely registered in her mind anymore. She just needed to get the hell out of there.

Now.

“What? No! No, look I’m sorry I said anything- just… don’t… don’t leave.” He begged her helplessly, making a grab for her hand.

For once, she pulled away. She ran away.

She was so caught up in her own thoughts that as she was making her escape, she ran right into Anita. Jenna had a bad habit of that- running into things.

“There you are! I’ve been looking everywhere for you! Kelsey and Brenna are off somewhere wreaking havoc, Corby is talking about how he beat the crap out of some kid, and you’ll never guess what I saw Kaitlyn and Alexxx doing down the hall.”Anita rambled with an uncharacteristically large amount of words for the usually fairly introverted girl.

“Ben said he loved me!” Jenna blurted, pulling Anita into a secluded corner so she could speak to her without having to continuously look over her shoulder, paranoid.

“Yeah, so?” Anita questioned rather unenthusiastically.

Jenna gaped at her disinterest. “What do you mean s-? Did you hear me? He said he loved me.”

Anita huffed. “Well we already knew that.” She stated impatiently.

Jenna gave a frustrated laugh, generally uncomfortable with the whole situation. “I would think that just the mere fact that the opinion was voiced is cause enough for distress. Not to mention he has a girlfriend.”

Anita smirked evilly. “Not anymore he doesn’t.” She stated, bringing out her phone. She presses a button or two and tilted the screen so that Jenna could see it.

“Oh, wow.” Before her was a rather compromising photo of Kaitlyn and Alexxx, devouring each others faces.

“Now will you please go reciprocate his feelings so we can move onto a new topic of discussion already?” She said.

“Um.” Jenna stated awkwardly.

“It’s that way.” Anita reminded her, giving her a polite shove in the right direction.

“Okay.” Jenna said, rather dazed as she walked back the way she came.

She found Ben sitting slumped against the wall, his shirt and suit rumpled but the blood now completely washed off his face. His cummerbund lay broken at his side.

“Hey.” She said quietly, feeling nervous again.

His head snapped up from his hands and he stared at her, gaping. “You came back.” He stated, quickly getting to his feet.

She nodded. “Me too.” She whispered fearfully.

“What?” He asked, confused and not sure what she was talking about.

“Uh,” She cleared her throat and tried to force herself to just say it. “Me- me too. You know, with the… the love… and stuff.”

He blinked at her, a slow grin spreading on his face as he realized what she was talking about. “Yeah?” He asked her.

She nodded slowly.

“Can you say it? In like, a sentence?” He teased, watching as she looked away.

“Why?” She asked, annoyed.

“Because I wanna hear it.”

She rolled her eyes at his answer. “Fine. I love you.”

His responding grin was blinding. “Me too.”

Then he kissed her.

THE FUCKING END

“Your girlfriend is looking for you.”

Ben gaped at her bluntness. “In… in the Hippodrome?”

Brenna rolled her eyes. “No, in the Death Star. Where do you think?”

“We were just coming back in anyway.” Jenna interrupted, walking back towards the direction of the building.

“We were?” Ben asked, following after her blindly.

Jenna ignored him and continued to walk away, forgetting that she was still wearing his jacket. She walked back through the doors leading into the auditorium and immediately ran into Kaitlyn.

“Hey, have you seen-” Kaitlyn started, but then stopped as her eyes surveyed Jenna’s attire. Ben walked in a moment later with Brenna in tow. “Isn’t that…” She trailed off, connecting the dots rather slowly.

“Ben, why is she wearing your jacket? W-what were you doing out there?”

“Oh, uhhhhh…” Ben stammered. Brenna merely smirked and stalked off, leaving Jenna to deal with it herself.

“I think I dropped something as I was coming in. Ben was just helping me look for it.” She lied easily, taking off the jacket and handing it back to him. He looked at her with grateful eyes.

“I’m… going to go get a drink.” Jenna said, walking in the opposite direction.

She stood at the punch bowl and tried to still her racing heart. She poured herself a cup of the red liquid with shaky hands.

Suddenly, the rambunctious group of boys standing next to her erupted in laughter. Her back to them, she didn’t know to duck out of the way as one of them rammed into her, effectively spilling the drink all across the front of her dress.

“Oh, shit…” She heard a male voice say. She turned around and saw Corby looking at her guiltily.

The Corby.

The Corby that, up until about two weeks ago, she had pined after desperately for about four years. That Corby.

“I’m really sorry.” He apologized as she merely stared at him. There was a beat of silence. “Um…” Corby stated as she continued to say nothing.

Jenna snapped out of her oh-my-god-he’s-talking-to-me trance and quickly grabbed a napkin, her embarrassment growing by the second. “Ugh, um no. It’s my fault. I- I wasn’t paying attention. Sorry.”

“I can’t believe I just did that.” He laughed, trying to seem concerned. Jenna rubbed furiously at the fabric of her dress, trying to get the red stain out.

“No, no. Sorry, it’s my fault.” She muttered, repeating it over again like a mantra.

“Um, let me help with that.” Corby stated, taking the napkin from her hands dabbing it delicately at the stain.

“What the hell!” The voice of Ben suddenly yelled, causing Jenna to take a startled step back.

“Ben, what are you doing?” Kaitlyn asked in the background. Her voice was inconsequential and Ben barely heard it. He was fueled by rage.

“Get your hands off of her.” He growled, ripping the older and taller boy away from his… friend.

“Dude, calm down.” Corby petitioned him, holding his hands up as if he were being arrested.

“Don’t touch her.” Ben warned, giving Corby a little shove to show he meant business. He realized in the back of his mind that Kaitlyn was a mere few steps away, pleading with him to stop.

It wasn’t that he held any contempt for the Corby. And in truth, he knew that nothing was really happening between the two. But he was angry, and frustrated, and on a very short fuse, and he was goddamn tired of having Jenna so close but never being able to tell her how he felt.

And the mere thought of her with someone else was driving him crazy.

“What is your problem?” Corby said, taking a step closer. He was confident that his athletic experience far topped that of Ben’s, and he was able to take the boy easily in a fight. 

“Ben.” Jenna said quietly, lightly touching his shoulder. She might as well have screamed his name through a megaphone. He stumbled backwards, jerked out of his wrathful daze. “Don’t, please don’t.” She begged in a whisper.

For a second, he actually seemed to hear her words. For a second, he seemed to be calming down. But Corby had other ideas.

“Hey!” He yelled as Ben began to walk away as if nothing had happened. Ben turned around and Corby took advantage of this opportunity. He drew his fist back and delivered an effective punch to the face.

“Oh my god!” Kaitlyn shrieked obnoxiously, putting her fluttering hands to her mouth in shock. “Oh my god, Ben, oh my god.” She muttered, rushing over to her now-unconscious boyfriend who had blood streaming down his face.

A group of people had now assembled around them to witness the action, blocking the adults from seeing anything that had occurred. Corby flexed his hand, smirking at the boy on the ground before walking over to a group of friends who huddled around him, delivering pats on the back and insensitive cheers.

Jenna stood frozen, shocked by what just happened. She felt an overwhelming need to go and help Ben, but it didn’t seem appropriate. It occurred to her that she should probably go find a teacher.

Before she could leave however, Kaitlyn stood up, her face covered with smeared makeup and tears. “This is your fault.” She accused, glaring in Jenna’s direction.

“What? I- I didn’t… do anything…” Jenna denied on instinct.

“You did something. Why was he saying that about you? What did you do?” She hissed at Jenna, stepping closer as if she were stalking her prey.

“I didn’t-!” Jenna looked away with nervous eyes. “C-can we just take care of Ben right now and maybe talk about this later?” She asked, hoping to calm Kaitlyn down a bit.

Kaitlyn glared at her, her eyes softening only at the mention of Ben. “Later.” She hissed menacingly. From below them, Ben groaned as he began to regain consciousness, causing both the girls to scramble to his side to help them.

Realizing that the action was over, the crowd of people dispersed quickly. “Let’s take him to the bathroom and clean the blood off.” Jenna suggested reasonably, not accustomed to treating the wounded.

“How?” Kaitlyn asked. “Drag him?” She didn’t wait for Jenna’s answer, already beginning to pick up his limp arm, pulling him across the dirty floor.

Jenna didn’t have time to protest before a male voice interrupted them. “Maybe I can help with that.”

Kaitlyn spun around only to find herself staring deeply into the eyes of Alex. He brought Ben up so that he was standing up, leaning on Alex for support as he limped along in his semi-conscious state.

Jenna stayed a few steps back, knowing that she could probably slip away unnoticed at this point, but still too worried about Ben to leave just yet. Alex and Kaitlyn whispered in front of her like gossiping schoolgirls, completely oblivious to her presence.

They reached the bathroom and Alex rested Ben on the cold tile floor. “Let’s go find a teacher.” Kaitlyn suggested. “Jenna can stay with Ben while we go look.”

Jenna was amazed by the fact that it was only a mere moment ago that Kaitlyn was accusing Jenna of being a home-wrecker, yet now she was entrusting her with the responsibility of looking after him. “Um, yeah. Sure.”

Kaitlyn was already out the door, however, not seeming to care enough to actually stay and hear her confirmation. Jenna wet some paper towels and sat down awkwardly on the floor next to Ben.

Not really sure what to do with herself, she hesitantly began wiping the blood of his face. He groaned in pain and his eyes fluttered open. “Jenna?” He asked, as if questioning if she were real or not.

“I’m so sorry.” Jenna apologized, wondering if perhaps he had a concussion. “How many fingers am I holding up?” She asked, waving her hand in front of him. She wasn’t sure if that was the right medical test for a concussion or not, but it seemed legit.

 He merely laughed and shook his head. “I’m fine, Jenna.” He said.

Jenna slumped back down and handed him the wet paper towel so he could finish washing his face himself.  Ben smirked at the towel in his hand. “So… that was pretty bad, huh?” He said, trying to crack a joke.

“Why did you do that?” Jenna asked, not in the mood to beat around the bush.

Ben sighed, looking away. There was a long pause.

“Because I’m in love with you.”

It has been two weeks since he last saw her. Two weeks, and he doesn’t think his heart can handle the pain any longer. Ben cranes his neck, eyes skimming over the scene at the park, searching for his one true love. She said she would meet him here at eleven. It’s nearly quarter past and there is no sign of her. She’s not coming.  Ben thinks, standing from where he sat on the swing. She’s not coming and she doesn’t love me.

His phone vibrates suddenly in his pocket, three steady pulses that mimic his heartbeat. His hands tremble as he pulls it from his pocket and stares at the screen. Jenna. His heart sinks — he already knows what the message says. Ben lifts the phone to his ear.

“Ben,” her voice floods through Ben’s ears. Oh, how he missed the sound of her voice. “I’m sorry, I can’t meet you today. Something came up with Corby.” So they were together. “He really needs me right now and I can’t leave him alone. I’m sorry, Ben. It’s just better this way.”

The line goes silent. Ben closes his eyes, that feeling returning to in heart. That feeling of emptiness, mixed with anger. Most of the time, it is the emptiness that overrides the anger, but this time, it is the latter. Fury rises in his chest. He cannot bear it anymore. He can’t live like this.

This must end.

And there is only one way to finish this.

  ***

The dark alley of the Hunt Valley movie theater conceals Ben from the mass of pre-teens standing at the entrance. Their squeals and screams make chills run up and down his spine. The noise reminds him of a time, not so long ago when he was with Jenna. She’d look at the teens, rolling her eyes, and mock their high pitched squeals.

The memory sends Ben spiraling in nostalgia. Sharp pangs shoot at his heart, every beat drawing him closer and closer to utter defeat. He loves her . . . so much he can barely stand it. Even now, standing alone in an alley, he can almost hear the sound of her voice — her laugh.

The noise snaps Ben from his reverie of memories. He wasn’t imagining it, it was her voice. Ben presses his back to the wall, and peeks over the edge of the building. Strolling from the exit of the theater, Corby and Jenna walk hand in hand. Corby leans over and mutters something into her ear, sending her into a fit of girlish laughter.

 At the sight, Ben feels sick.

Wrath begins to bubble in his throat, and he is thirsty. Thirsty for revenge, that is.

The couple stops just a few yards from the alley. “Goodnight, Corby,” he can hear Jenna says. “I love you.” She wraps her arms around him before turning to depart, a smile on her face. Corby stands alone now, grinning as his love recedes into the darkness.

Ben licks his lips, anticipation creeping over his skin. Now is the time to put his plan into action. “Corby!” he hisses. The other boy turns, frowning into the alley.

“Hello? Is someone there?” He takes a few tentative steps forward. One more step, and Ben springs into action. 

“Stop messing with your hair you look fine.” Brenna rolled her eyes at Jenna as she watched her put her hands up to fix her hair again. “He’s not even here yet.”

“Are you sure?” She asked with emphasis, nervously pulling on the hem of her dress.

“Why? It’s not like you care, right?” Anita teased with a purely evil smile on her face.

“Shut up.” Jenna responded intelligently. She found that when it came to the subject of Ben, she had trouble coming up with witty retorts.

“Where did Brenna go?” Kelsey asked, using her vertical advantage to scan over the crowd, looking for the shorter brunette, who was nowhere to be found.

Brenna, meanwhile, was making her way to the water fountain, unaware she was being followed. She turned down a hallway and an arm shot out, tugging on her arm and pulling her against the wall.

Ben.

“Did you tell her?” He whispered, hoping that the dark corner would hide their altercation.

“What the hell is-?” Brenna started to ask, pushing him off in a hurry.

“Just tell me. How much did you tell her?” He asked, sounding desperate. He glanced behind himself, paranoid, undoubtedly looking for either Jenna or his girlfriend.

“Nothing!” Brenna hissed angrily, pushing him back another foot.

He ignored the shove, sighing in relief and pinching the bridge of his nose. “Don’t. Please, please don’t tell her.” He begged.

Brenna huffed and looked away, hating that she was caught in the middle of all this. “This is your problem dude. But you need to get your shit worked out. You can’t do this to… either of them.” She said. He didn’t need her to elaborate on her vague statement. The meaning behind her words was fairly obvious.

“I don’t know what-”

“Don’t care.” Brenna stated before walking away, thoroughly pissed off.

Ben took a deep breath and straightened his tie with one hand before walking into the figurative lion’s den. He could see Kaitlyn out of the corner of his eye, but he ignored her.

He only had eyes for Jenna.

He made a beeline straight for her watching as she laughed with her group of friends. She had never looked so radiant, so glowing. His love for her grew the longer he looked at her.

He took a deep breath and steeled himself to go after her. As he walked over to that side of the room she looked up and searched the surrounding area. He made eye contact with her and smiled, but she glanced away as if she hadn’t seen him, even though she clearly had. He smirked. Her awkwardness was one of the many traits he revered about her.

“Hey. Don’t say hi to me or anything.” He joked to her as soon as he walked up. Immediately, her friends stopped their conversations and shrank back, trying to blend into the walls, but staying within earshot.

“I didn’t know you were here yet.” She said.

He grabbed her hands, intertwining their fingers. Whenever he was around her he couldn’t stop himself from touching her, even in the basest of ways. He swung their hands back and forth between them to make it seem more casual.

“Ben!” Kaitlyn shrieked from across the room. He jerked back, ripping their hands apart and putting his behind his back, his face a flaming red. He tried his hardest to wipe the deer-in-the-headlights look from his face. “Ben, it’s our song! Come dance with me!” She shouted again as Justin Bieber’s “Boyfriend” played on the speakers.

It took him a second to realize that he wasn’t caught. He gulped and looked back to Jenna, who was looking away. “I should, um… probably go.” He said, staring at his slightly scuffed dress shoes.

“Yeah.” She whispered, glancing behind her as if she were looking for someone else. He wondered if she was looking for someone else. Like, someone else-else.

“Um, but I don’t really have to.” He said, biting his lip.

Jenna’s brow furrowed, confused by his never-ending mixed signals. “But, she… She’s your girlfriend.” Jenna muttered, momentarily forgetting that she was supposed to feel uncomfortable as she tried to decipher the hidden message behind his statement.

Ben shrugged. He held out his hand. “Dance with me?”

Jenna struggled for words. “We… we shouldn’t do that.” She said, trying to convince herself as much as she was trying to convince him.

He looked at Jenna, sure of only one thing. He didn’t want to leave her.

“Do you want to take a walk, then?” He asked, offering his hand one last time.

Jenna fought an internal conflict and decided for the first time in their sudden, secretive relationship that she would throw caution to the wind. To hell with girlfriends.

She accepted his hand, fighting the grin off her face as they walked through the double doors together, into the cold nighttime air. “Where are we walking?” She asked, wrapping her arms around herself for warmth.

Ben shrugged his suit jacket off his shoulders, holding it out so she could slip her arms into it. He couldn’t help but love the way his clothes looked on her. It was the possessive part of him that made him think that way, he was sure. “Away from here.” He said, as if it were not obvious.

Jenna tried not to feel elated as they strolled the sidewalk, being careful not to wander too far off from the bright lights of front entrance of the Hippodrome. Ben shoved his hands down his pockets. Their silence thickened.

Jenna wondered idly if perhaps their awkwardness was, in fact, not awkwardness, but sexual tension, as her friends had tried to drill in her brain so many times before.

“I like your dress.” Ben stated as if he were fishing for things to say.

“Thanks.” Jenna paused, then realized that it was still her turn to say something. She decided to go with her gut and apologize. “So, um, sorry about Brenna the other day, you know, on the phone. That was just…weird.” She said, making a face that was between a grimace and a smirk.

Ben chuckled nervously. “Um, yeah… weird.”

“As much as I hate to break up this lovely little scene over here, y’all need to get back in there.” Brenna’s sarcastic voice cut through the tension like a knife cutting water.

They both snapped their heads in her direction, seeing her observing them from a few feet away, her thumb pointed in the direction of the Hippodrome. Although her words were mocking, her expression remained serious.

“Um, why?” Ben asked, not making eye contact with her.

“Your girlfriend is looking for you.”

“He’s in love with you.” Brenna pointed out as she slammed her ballet shoes onto the slick wood floors with a dull slap.

Jenna jumped at the sound, paranoid as usual. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She tried to say convincingly, wishing it was true.

Brenna knew her far too well. She rolled her eyes. “Right, of course you don’t.” They had to cut their conversation short as Kaitlyn walked onto the stage, hair pulled in pigtails and covered in glitter as usual.

That didn’t stop Brenna from smirking the whole rehearsal however, much to Jenna’s continual annoyance. From across the stage, Jenna watched as her phone vibrated in her bag, the screen flashing with his name.

He was calling her again.

Unfortunately for her, Brenna happened to be on that side of the room. The choreography made it so Jenna was physically stuck to that side of the stage, forced to witness the horror as it unfolded before her very eyes.

Brenna, evil glimmering in her eyes, took Jenna’s cell phone from the safety of her bag and flipped it open, glancing at the name with malicious glee and answering the call. Jenna, who lacked super human hearing and was not well-versed in the tactics of lip-reading was left to merely guess at what they were saying.

“Hello?” Brenna answered the phone, watching Jenna as she tried to mimic the motion of wringing her neck.

“Jenna?” Ben’s voice was groggy over the line, as if he had just woke up or possibly finished crying.

Brenna decided that now was the time to tap into the better angels of her nature. “No, it’s-”

“Shh, don’t talk.” He whispered into the phone. “I need you to just listen right now.”

Brenna snapped her mouth shut, unsure what to do or say as he just continued speaking, unaware of the mistaken identity. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you… for a while now. I… I…”

He sighed heavily as if the words were impossible to get out. He gave a nervous laugh. “Sorry. This is harder than I thought it would be.”

Brenna stood where she was, shocked to the point where she was practically frozen in place. She made eye contact with Jenna, who read her dumbfounded expression and assumed the worst.

Oh god. Jenna thought, so caught up in wondering what was going on on the other side of the stage that she almost missed her cue. It’s going to be something really bad. Maybe his dog died or he’s failing out of high school or something. She considered seriously.

Meanwhile, Brenna was at a loss for both words and actions. Ben continued his monologue. “I like… talking to you. I like it way too much. I like it better than talking to…” He trailed off. “What I mean is, I think I’m- I know I’m falling in lo-”

Conveniently in that very second, Jenna made her way to the other side of the stage, ripping the phone away from Brenna. Brenna merely stood there with her eyebrows raised. Jenna answered the phone herself this time.

“Hello? Hey, are you there?” She heard Ben say as soon as she put the cell to her ear. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-”

“What?” Jenna asked, walking away from the noise so she could hear him better. “No, sorry. That was Brenna, she stole my phone. Sorry, what were you saying?” She repeated, apologizing needlessly with an anxious laugh.

There was a pause. “You… you mean…?” He stated disbelievingly. “I… I have to go!” He exclaimed before abruptly hanging up, leaving Jenna with nothing but dial tone.

She looked at her phone in surprise, wondering to herself what Brenna could have possibly said to elicit such a passionate reaction from him. She walked back over to her friend, not sure whether she should be confused or angry.

“What did you say to him?” She asked.

Brenna blinked at her, unsure of whether she should share the information she just overheard. She looked between Jenna and the phone in Jenna’s hand in quick succession. “He’s in love with you.” She said, her voice sounding shocked to her own ears. The difference was, this time she meant it.

But just like before, Jenna denied. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She said, rolling her eyes once before walking away again.

Jenna stood outside the recital room in the cold air, tapping her foot and checking her phone for what had to have been the third time in the last minute. He said he would be here. He said he was only a minute away.

She would wait another minute, she decided. Another minute and then she would go back inside where it was warm. Just then, a car peeled into the lot, practically burning rubber as it spun into a parking spot in a glorious blur of dirt and gravel.

Jenna stood frozen in her place, shocked by how close the car came to nearly chopping her to bits. With wide eyes she watched as none other than the infamous Ben stepped out of the driver’s seat, flipping his tousled hair with a smirk. Jenna was floored by this uncharacteristic badass-ness. Where was the short, shy blonde boy with braces she had come to love? Certainly this Evil-Knievel emerging from the sports car was not the same boy?

“Hey. I’m not late am I?” He asked, as if the answer were not obvious.

Jenna endeavored to remain polite. “Not really. It just stared.” She refrained from telling him that by ‘just started’, she really meant ‘just started twenty minutes ago.’

The little white lie was worth it- the budding smile that emerged on his face will never fail to make her swoon. “Well then let’s go wifey!” He said, the grin plastered on his face as he grabbed her hand.

Jenna’s generally squeamish nature made it so that her instinctual response was to rip her hand away, and possibly run screaming. She had to remind herself that it was just Ben. He was just… affectionate. It meant nothing.

Right?

As they walked back into the warmth of the building she tried not to second guess herself. Thankfully, he began to chatter, filling up the silence with meaningless small-talk. “So are you excited for Cappies, oh date?” He asked teasingly, giving her hand a squeeze.

“Um… you realize Kaitlyn is going to be there, right?” She reminded him. He stiffened and released her hand, becoming rigid, as he always did when her name was mentioned.

“So?” He questioned rather harshly.

“So… isn’t she going to be your date?”

Ben rubbed the back of his neck as he tried to hide his obvious frown. “I guess…” He said reluctantly.

Not wanting to upset him, Jenna tried her best to take back her words. “But I could be your other date though!” She said, putting in extra effort to sound cheery.

He looked back at her, giving her a small smile. It was nothing near to the mega-watt grin he had gifted her with mere moments ago, but it was something. It was something better than a frown. She hates it when he frowns. “Yeah, definitely.” He whispered, reaching for her hand again.

This time, Jenna was expecting the hand-holding. She braced herself for it and tried to keep a nonchalant expression on her face as he gripped her hand in his. This was not a big deal.

She looked up from the ground and realized that maybe it was a bigger deal than she had first thought. Before her, in their seats, sat the family of Kaitlyn- cousins, parents, the whole shebang. And here she was, holding hands with Kaitlyn’s boyfriend.

For a moment, she wondered if it was at all possible for her to spontaneously combust out of embarrassment.

Ben seemed generally unconcerned.

He led Jenna past the family without even a glance in their direction. She breathed a sigh of relief when none of Kaitlyn’s over-protective Aunts jumped out in front of them, accusing Jenna of duplicity.

“So why aren’t you dancing?” He asked as they took their seats, ignoring the annoyed shushes from the other audience members around them.

“I’m not in this show.” Jenna tried to explain tersely, hoping it would encourage him to quiet down and enjoy the performance.

He did not pick up on her subtle hint. “I’m going to the next one, will you be in that?” He asked, making no effort to keep his voice down.

“Yes. But you aren’t allowed to watch me dance.”

Ben smirked, but sounded incredibly sincere when he spoke next. “Too bad. I’m going to anyway. And I’ll bring you flowers too.”

She kept her eyes focused on the stage in front of her, trying to hide her smile. “That’s not really necessary.”

“Yes it is.”

“Jenna!” The loud whisper-yell of her friend, Brenna, broke through the awkwardness. Jenna glanced behind her to see Brenna waving her hands in an animated fashion, trying to get her attention. “Come sit over here!” She exclaimed.

They moved back a few rows, resulting in Jenna squished between Brenna on one side and Ben on the other. Her wallet rested in her lap. Brenna made a grab for it.

“Ooh, look at this. A Learner’s Permit. How fancy.” Brenna said, dangling the card in front of her face in an effort to tease Jenna.

Jenna snatched it out of her hand and quickly hid it from sight. “Hey, I wanna see!” Ben said, feeling rather left out.

“No, I look horrible in that picture.”

“No you don’t. You look pretty.” Brenna said with only the slightest bit of sarcasm in her voice.

“She always looks pre-” Ben nearly reveals, catching himself at the last second and turning his face to the stage in embarrassment. There was a stunning silence.

“Well…” Brenna’s voice drawled out into the awkwardness, elongating the word in an effort to be humorous.

Suddenly, there was applause and people were beginning to stand on their feet. Jenna realized that the show had ended and parents were now making a mad rush to the stage in order to get pictures with their children.

“Ugh, let’s get out of here.” Brenna said as she began to walk in the opposite direction, eager to get out of the way of the bustling crowd of proud family members wielding outdated Kodak cameras.

“I’ll be there in a second.” Jenna called after her, turning back to Ben who now stood, hands shoved down his pockets and eyes staring at his shoes. Jenna glanced past him. “Kaitlyn’s probably looking for you.”

“Yeah.” He stated glumly.

There was a pause, and neither made a move to leave. “You should go find her.” Jenna suggested.

Ben heaved out a massive sigh of discontent. “I’m going out to dinner with her and her family after. I’ll text you?” He said, looking up at her with sad puppy-dog eyes.

Jenna smiled at him. “Sure.” She conceded.

He smiled and pulled her into a hug. It’s scientifically proven that the average hug lasts three seconds. Jenna counted. This one lasted six.

After she pulled away she offered him one last goodbye smile. “I’ll see you at Cappies.” She said over her shoulder as she was walking out. He gave her a half-hearted wave before turning away.

Just as she was about to leave through the double doors, Jenna glanced back to see Ben walk up to Kaitlyn and give her a congratulatory hug. Jenna counted.

Two seconds.