#rarecrows

It was no secret that Jesper Fahey flirted with everyone.

That’s what Kaz told himself every time he felt oddly flustered in his presence. He also started acting strangely on occasion when he was around, like dropping a stack of documents if Jesper touched him or staring at his long, deft fingers raking through his messy hair. Ghezen, he was at a loss with Inej off capturing criminals on her new ship. They were taking it slow and hadn’t made promises to each other. Jesper was in somewhat of an open relationship with Wylan, so if either of them acted on their feelings, it’s not like they’d be cheating.

But Kaz Brekker wasn’t known for acting on emotion alone. He was called Dirty Hands for a reason and the name struck terror in the hearts of nearly every citizen in Ketterdam. So why did he feel the urge to kiss Jesper and doodle his name in a journal like a lovesick fool?

It became very annoying after a while. His waking thoughts were filled with the sounds of his cheerful voice and the sights of his handsome face. Everything came to a head when Jesper knocked on his office door one evening, high off the victory of another successful job. The clocks were nearing 12 bells, but everyone was still wide awake downstairs in the Crow Club, gambling away any money they had made that day.

“You rang for me, boss?” Jesper asked, dressed in a rumpled overcoat and his hair all mussed up. It was an ordinary look for him, but Kaz was seeing him in a whole new light.

He cleared his throat, hoping that the dim lighting was adequate in concealing the faint blush on his pale cheeks. 

“Everything went according to plan tonight?”

He nodded brightly, “Right down to detonating the explosives in the upper floor. Mark my words.”

“Who the hell is Mark?”

Jesper chuckled when Kaz’s lips curled into a short smile, “Damn, who knew you had a sense of humor?”

“Any plans for the weekend?” he asked, placing the file that he had retrieved in a drawer under his desk.

He shrugged, “Not really, Wylan’s out of town. Just planning to hang about the Crow club. You?”

“The same, I guess - ”

Jesper frowned, “Wait a sec - Kaz, why are you blushing? No, wait, let me guess. A hot date, right? This weekend? Who is it - ”

“Slow down, Jes. It’s not - ”

“Since when do you call me that?” he interrupted. 

Kaz felt his pulse beat faster as he struggled for an answer. Words never came easily to him, especially when it was admitting feelings. But he took the plunge and just spoke the first thought that came into his mind. Wasn’t Inej always telling him to be more open and honest?

“I - I think it’s you,” he said slowly. 

“What about me?” Jesper frowned in confusion.

“That’s making me - feel this way. The blushing and all.”

He winked, “I have that effect on people. I’m surprised you just noticed that.”

“I really want to kiss you,” Kaz blurted out without warning.

Realization suddenly dawned on Jesper’s face and he looked like he was about to burst out laughing. Before he could say anything else, Kaz leaned forward and kissed him.

It was nothing like he expected. With Inej, it felt soft and chaste. But with him, it was definitely different. It felt playful and exciting, speeding up his heart rate and making him yearn for more. He expected Jesper to pull away and he already had an apology in mind for his actions.

Instead, Jesper grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him closer, deepening their kiss. This is what he yearned for all those days and it was an absolute relief to finally achieve it. He tasted like whiskey and cognac, no doubt from spending time at the club’s bar. A gunshot rang out in the distance and he heard the familiar sounds of the Stadwatch, but none of that mattered. Everything in this saints forsaken city faded away until it felt like they were the only two people.

Suddenly, a knock rang out on the door. The two broke apart hesitantly, breathing heavily and staring deep into each other’s eyes. Jesper broke the silence first with an awkward laugh.

“So - uh….wow.”

“Yeah, wow.”

Kaz looked down at the table, realizing that his leather gloves were discarded. Damn, had he touched Jesper without realizing it? Nothing about this scene felt real. The whole world had a surreal, unnatural look to it. Especially during this evening when they were supposed to be focused on their job.

With a deep sigh, he grabbed his gloves and placed them on. The person pounding on his office door didn’t stop. On the contrary, they continued it in an irritating fashion. Kaz had the sudden urge to slit the bastard’s throat for daring to interrupt them.

“Uh, should I leave then?” Jesper asked, motioning towards the door.

He wanted him to stay. More than anything in this world. Kaz figured that one kiss would have halted all the pining in his heart. Perhaps he just needed to satisfy some lustful urges, but deep down, he knew it was different. But instead of asking him to stay, his mind betrayed his heart’s desires.

“Yes, send them in,” he replied in a steady tone.

Jesper nodded, looking crestfallen. “I’ll see you in the morning.”