(for your visualization)🙏

I read the post about “It is ok not to write smut in your fic” by my good and wise friend @anarchycox I totally share with her the vision that sex is not necessary in a fic, but I better than anyone else I’m conscious that if I ‘ever’ write smut (which never occurs because I suck at it, not pun intended.) I will got plenty of notes, comments and reblogs. Let’s be honest.

It is clearly wrong to be forced to add sex to a piece of writing just for the sake of kudos and comments, as it is for trying to satisfy your readers - who fail to capture the real meaning of the written piece - but fandoms (any fandom to be fair) prefer works rated M and E over the rest, especially if it adds sex. 

It is fair to explain for many that the use of M or E rating does not implies the depiction of sexual encounters among the characters, but to be clear that some of the topics covered in the piece can be shocking and may cause discomfort or distress in the reader by narrating a very detailed violent scene or because the confession from one of the characters involved might be disturbing to the reader, it is not referred to sex only.

So, having M or E rating should not suggest the presence of sex as relevant part of the written piece. We are (and I included myself in this) misreading the rating system.

I can see it here in Kingsman (now I put a tag). I’ve been writing different kind of things, from character-centered drabbles to more long stories including OCs to enrich the narrative... and guess what? What do I get? A couple of kudos and almost no comments. You can go and check in AO3, I’m not a liar and I know I’m not the only one who has experienced this here.

I’m not complaining, but in my case (from my personal morals and beliefs, I repeat MINE) I don’t really go to the homosexual trend in explicit terms in my writing and that has affected my visibility in the fandom. I knew from the beginning that something like that would occur, because this is not my first fandom (I stopped writing for 6 years for many reasons), so I’m not that naive.

But you know what? You feel the pressure. I feel the pressure. Because sub-consciously I know that if I write Harry and Eggsy banging in a dark alley I will get kudos, that if Merlin and Eggsy shag until exhaustion in the comms room, I will get praised, but in the end, does it matter? Do I have to betrayed myself for praised?

NO, I DON’T. Because there are readers for every writer, experienced or novel, maybe my readership has yet to come, maybe it will never come, but I will keep writing because I love it, because I feel it, because it has helped a lot while struggling with my English, which happens to be my second language.

So, yes. Do I think I deserve better? Yes. AND SO DO YOU.

look, there is a lot of rage going on right now because of a few voice lines in the PTR, and without getting into personal head canon preferences or the discourse (tm) I just want to make it clear that I am no fan of Gency

and it’s all because of what happens in game whether it’s in quickplay or comp, whenever I get put on a team with someone who considers themselves a pro-Genji (c) there are a few things that almost all of them do to make the Mercy experience difficult or downright aggravating

They seem to have peanut levels of allergy to the point or payload. This shouldn’t be too much of a problem or surprise - Genji is supposed to be a flanking offense, right? And therefore the usual happening of them going off to live out their cyborg ninja fantasies on the other side of the map should be expected. Where the grief happens is I’ll be busy keeping the rest of the team alive on the objective when Genji starts spamming for heals after taking three damage. Then comes the demands to pocket heal them, or the solo rez, or any number of things that benefit them and not the team as a whole

Then there’s the abuse. There seems to be a very real thing where the more ‘pro’ a Genji main considers themselves, the more entitled they feel to put down others in their team (this also seems to be true of many a McCree). If Mercy doesn’t immediately fly away from the actual fight to pocket the demanding cyborg or solo rez from the other side of the map, then the shit hits the fan.

“Why do you even bother playing?” “Who plays a healer is FPS?”

“Most useless member on the team” “Mercy is the most trash hero in the game”

“Play a real support”

I’ve had people actually throw comp games because I decided to focus on the team instead of their shiny metal butt.

In isolation none of this would be too bad - Overwatch is an online multiplayer after all and you have to expect the odd turd on your team. But this has been the ongoing story for two comp seasons in a row now and I can help but wince whenever I see that genji icon pop up

Why don’t I like Gency? Because Genji players shit me up the wall.

Here’s the thing. Ship whoever you want

Gency, Pharamercy, Torb x Bastion - who cares

What I'd done in my previous life that I feel so unlucky in this life? Everything seems off, something is wrong somewhere. I'm tired tho. Nothing went well. All is pain inside me, in front of me.

Tonight when I listen to Circles by Post Malone, it remind me of you. It make senses now. You once posted about this song, and we talked about it.

Now I realize you'd changed since then. You're no longer reply to my message like you did. Your life change 360°, upside down.

But still... I pray the best for you though. Who doesn't change, right? We're adapting to new life right now- in this pandemic, in this new norm. It hards, it hurts, but life goes on.