#ranpoxreader

Y/n: Hmm? This is the 5th time in a day you said you bored.

Ranpo: I want to hang out!~

Y/n: But I have a case to solve and you have a case to solve...

Ranpo: Don't want to do it! I don't want to do it! I want to go play!

Y/n: Ehh... But I'm on a mission....

Ranpo: (puffy) I can't stand it!

Y/n: Come on, Ranpo, it'll be less boring if you go solve the case.

Ranpo: So when I'm done, will Y/n hang out with me?

Y/n: Yes, of course, you ask Tanizaki to take you to the crime scene and when you're done, go back to him. I will return to the Agency as soon as I finish my work.

Ranpo: You promised! Don't break that promise! I'll be done in a flash!

Y/n: Yes, you work happily, I promise.

/ Needless to say, Ranpo was excited to solve the case quickly, surprising Tanizaki, the detective, and even the killer. Not long after Ranpo returned to the Agency, Y/n finished his work. She takes Ranpo around to buy sweets and have fun, however.../

Y/n: Ranpo!!! Where are you?!?

Ranpo: Hmm?~ I'm eating crepes, the crepes here are delicious.

Y/n: Agh! You must tell me! Do you know how scared I was when I came back and didn't see you?

Ranpo: It's just that I think that place selling crepes looks delicious, you should try it again soon.

Y/n: Haizzz, I'll stay put for you. Ranpo, you describe the scene, I'll be right there and Don't-walk around.

/Y/n patted her forehead to find the talented but super childish detective, she swore that she would hold his hand next time and never leave him alone, lest she have to go all over Yokohama to find him again/

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(A/N: Deduction? More like seduction when it comes to Ranpo ammirite (¬‿¬) okay I’ll just show myself out now lol

Short background: you’re a brand new detective recruited by the ADA. You have no ability, like Ranpo, and you’ve been hired to work with him as a team, similar to Double-Black.)

The sun was setting over the crime scene, casting a soft orange glow against the victim’s face and painting the cement dully. Your cheeks flushed as Ranpo leaned down towards you, his eyes squinted without his glasses. You found this aspect of his appearance almost too adorable to bear. Hell, everything about him was charming. Of course, you’d never admit this to him, as his ego was already overfed as is.

“Good grief, I know we’re meant to solve this case together but I really could’ve done this all on my own.” After saying this, he opened his eyes fully and met your gaze, his face remaining impassive yet thoughtful. “Training junior detectives like you isn’t all bad I suppose, your stupidity greatly emphasizes the true magnificence of my ability! Gosh, you’re quite lucky to have me as a mentor, hm?” At this, you let out a faint ‘tch’ and backed away from the sleuth, watching him straighten up and yawn.

You didn’t try arguing with Ranpo, because you honestly agreed with what he said, blatant as it may have been. You believed if anyone had earned the right to be cocky, it was this man. He had endured a great deal of suffering being in the ADA, likely having to put in a lot more work than those who had abilities as a sort of crutch. You respected him, admired him, and wanted to emulate him.

“I’ve found two key pieces of evidence here, Ranpo-san.” You decided to give your best effort at impressing the detective, so you crouched down next to the victim on the ground and gestured for him to come near. He said nothing, instead giving a small nod to show you had his attention.

“The wallet found next to the body has a small keychain on the zipper, with a ring attached. I presume this was a wedding band, as it is set with a diamond and engraved. Clearly, the victim was divorced but they did not initiate the separation, as they would not have been likely to hold onto the jewelry if they no longer loved their ex-spouse.” You paused for a moment in contemplation, and Ranpo watched as you brushed a strand of hair out of your face. He felt an unexpected pang of longing in his chest.

“Secondly, there is a torn photograph of the victim and who looks to be her husband on the ground. From everything here, I conclude that she probably didn’t handle the divorce well, lashed out at her ex or stalked him, and he was driven to murder her out of spite. He probably had a hard time meeting other women with her around, so that could have been another motivating factor. The culprit is the person in this photo, so we just need to find him and it’ll be case solved!” You beamed at the man across from you, standing up expectantly. You were hoping he’d give you praise, because surely you had everything correct, right?

“Nooope! Goodness (y/n), I suppose I shouldn’t hold you to such high standards but I was hoping I’d have a bit of competition! Ah well, let me give you a rundown, then.” Your face turned bright red and you quickly scanned the ground for more clues, not finding any. What had he seen that you overlooked? Ranpo opened his mouth to continue, not taking his piercing gaze off of you.

“I don’t even need my super deduction glasses for this, it’s so simple.” He smirked and your already-warm cheeks got warmer.

“First off, the ring is important, so you get a point for that. But, this woman was not divorced! Rather, she was widowed when a member of the Port Mafia murdered her husband.” Ranpo’s playful expression turned into one of sadness for a brief moment, and you fought the urge to comfort him. He rarely wore vulnerable faces like that.

“If you take a closer look at the picture, you’ll see the date on it is marked one week after the date engraved on the ring. Similarly, the date on the ring was only one week and three days ago, so they were newly-weds. Divorce after that short amount of time, huh?” You realized that he was right- probability was an important aspect of this line of work and you needed to master it.

“What else?” You asked quietly, feeling a bit discouraged. Ranpo walked around the corpse to your side before going on, noticing the change in your demeanor.

“The outfit that the woman is wearing in the photo is the exact one she has on now; however, her clothes here are dirty as if they’ve been slept in for days. Her makeup is also streaked down her face, but not in such a way that it appears she was crying recently, it’s more like she never got the chance to wash it off and just wore it around the streets for some time. Furthermore, her jaw is broken and she suffered three bullet-wounds to the chest, trademark of the Mafia. Also, note the dried blood on her fingernails. In conclusion...” The man turned to face you once again and tilted his head to the side, he placed a hand on your shoulder and your thoughts became muddled.

“This woman’s husband was murdered one week after their wedding, she probably knew he had dealings with the Port Mafia but agreed to the wedding if he left that life behind. Gang members, being vicious and cold-blooded, decided to kidnap him and murder him before he tried to get out, and so she set off in search of the groom. She found his mutilated body, evidenced by the older blood on her fingers, slept on the streets for a few days in shock being unable to return to their home and face reality. She might’ve seen someone involved in her husband’s murder so the Mafia killed her too, or they just killed her by association. That part, I’m not sure of, only because each is equally cruel and equally likely by the hands of these criminals.”

When he was finished, you felt numb. There was no sadness or fear, only an empty sort of sensation deep in your heart. “Sorry, I really am disappointing. I just, never would have imagined such a thing...” You were cut off by a warm, heavy feeling coating your shoulders and you realized Ranpo had given you his cloak and was ushering you back towards headquarters.

“Don’t apologize for being good-natured, (y/n). This job can dim the light in good people like you, but your heart is strong. I know you’ll bring peace to a lot of people, so don’t give up, okay?” He smiled at you kindly and patted your head.

Maybe you could do this, after all.

(Sorry, I'm writing about bsd quite a bit because? Imlove??? but feel free to send requests for other animes/one-shot concepts!! Also, I'm writing this in bed at midnight on my phone instead of my laptop out of laziness so apologies for typos I'm exhausted and will fix them tomorrow if there are any! ^^)

You walked into the crowded cafè, your heartbeat becoming louder with every step you took towards the line at the counter. You were out shopping for used books to read in your spare time and decided to get some coffee as a pick-me-up; unfortunately, the particular spot you had chosen to buy from was very popular, especially on weekends.

Once you got to the back of the line, you felt the blood rushing to your face and considered leaving. Two girls around your age had gotten in line behind you and were laughing loudly, blocking the exit. You decided you'd stay to get your drink rather than subject yourself to the painful situation that would inevitably ensue should you try to get out the door. It would likely go something like this: you'd turn around and say "excuse me" in your usual quiet, polite voice and, because they were busy talking with one another they wouldn't hear you. You'd then try to maneuver around them and accidentally bump into one of their shoulders, and the girls would either glare at you, laugh at you, or say something rude like "watch where you're going." Things always went this way, and while you knew it was mostly your fault for not speaking up and being assertive, part of you just wished people would be more aware and mindful of their surroundings in public.

Since you left your phone at home, you didn't have much to distract yourself with while waiting, other than the art of finding patterns in the floorboards. You liked to have something to fiddle with in situations like these so you didn't accidentally make eye contact with a stranger or engage in unnecessary interaction.

You saw the back of the person's shoes in front of you step forward out of view and you shuffled up a bit, grateful that the line was progressing. Wondering how many more orders there were before yours, you decided to glance up quickly. Instead of your gaze falling on the back of some stranger's heads, you directly met a pair of vibrant hazel eyes.

You felt more heat rise to your face and you quickly looked away, smiling amiably, glancing around aimlessly at anything but the man in front of you. You wished he would turn back around.

"Excuse me, miss! I don't mean to be too forward but you are positively angelic! I am truly blessed to be in the presence of such beauty, would you perhaps want to commit a double suicide with me?!" With this, he clasped his hands together as if in prayer and leaned closer to you, his mouth upturned into a beaming smile, awaiting a response.

"Er.. haha, what?" You laughed awkwardly, certain that your face was now the color of fresh strawberries. You'd never had such an odd encounter with someone before, and you weren't sure if this guy was crazy or...?

"Ah my apologies, I should at least introduce myself before I suggest an act of eternally-binding love. Dazai Osamu." Dazai extended his hand toward you, and you shook it hesitantly. You knew your palms were covered in cold sweat and you hated yourself for it, you couldn't help but think he probably found you unappealing now.

"Ah, my name is (y/n). Nice to me- et y- ou." You felt the air leave your throat in a distorted, constricted manner as it typically did when you felt overwhelmed. Talking to anyone, let alone a tall, handsome guy was immensely difficult. Again, you cursed yourself for being so stupid and felt a small wave of nervous laughter pass your lips.

Dazai took note of your anxious state and his brow furrowed slightly. He felt an odd desire to protect you.

"Hey, this line is taking quite a long time, hm? I know a much better place to get coffee, and it's a lot less crowded! Care to go, love?" After asking, he gestured back towards the doors, and you shook your head with a faint, jumbled 'ohmhmsurethankyou.'

Once you were back outside, you began to feel a bit better. The streets were expansive, so it was easy to avoid bumping into others. Dazai led you on a short trip to a new cafè wordlessly, and only once you finally sat down to drink your coffee did he ask you a question.

"You seemed a bit nervous back there, is everything okay?"

You finally looked up at him properly and took a second to appreciate the pleasantness of his appearance. His dark brown hair matched his eyes, which coordinated well with the tan dress coat he wore. The sun hit the jewel of his tie at such an angle that caused small, blue spots to flicker across the table as he shifted his body.

"Ah yeah, I'm alright, thank you. I just, don't do too well in crowded places, ahah.. I guess I'm pretty shy, you know.." You said this in a forced sort of tone, which Dazai must have seen through instantly given his retort.

"Hmmm.. I could be wrong, but I don't think 'shy' people have trouble breathing around strangers. Seems to me that you have social anxiety, no?" The man brought his coffee to his lips and was now watching the people across the street. You wondered if he was avoiding eye contact to make you more comfortable.

"I guess so.." you laughed nervously yet again, and went on, "I've tried all sorts of things to help it but I'm just not good with people. I don't let it prevent me from living my life or anything, so it's not that big a deal." You chewed on the side of your cheek, despising the silence.

Dazai said nothing, but he had a grin on his face and still was not looking at you.

"Funny you should ask about me though, I mean, apparently you want to kill yourself. That's a more, uh, prominent issue." You felt relieved when he finally turned his head back to you and spoke.