#random shoes

welp, i did not expect to bawl my eyeballs out on a random wednesday morning.

i was watching sherlock the other day and what the hell is eugene doing there?

post-irony is tired out. everyone hates this episode for being cheesy, apparently. it is. floating away into the ether at the end there was sheer camp. but like. the cheesy made me cry like a baby so maybe i’m an unrefined pleb OR i have a heart

love and monsters if it was good. it’s a wonderful life if it actually broke your fucking heart. etc. fundamentally altered something within me. even though it wasn’t actually written by him… peak rtd, it’s even got the trademark alternate timeline death by car accident… haven’t felt this way since watching all of us strangers last month i’m serious

none of this is criticism btw. i LOVE random shoes precisely because it makes my heart ache. eugene has the masculine version of my deadname and used to compete in interschool stem championships as a kid like me before he burnt out and believed in far fetched fantasies because he couldn’t face reality even at twenty or however old he is like me and all of that hits way too close for comfort i have to keep pausing and catching my breath. can life be good will it ever feel worth it will i always be trapped in my unchanging ways. a ghost while i’m still alive

watching torchwood as somebody with chronic low level suicidal ideation is a trip cuz. this is like the fifth episode now somebody has either killed themselves wanted to kill themselves or alluded to killing themselves. fantastic

watching random shoes w my friend and my GOD it is SO hard to not say anything. the first 70% of this episode is so hard