#rain-blo

Rollin' Up The Grape Ape!

The kanima was looking at cheap candy snacks to enjoy on the drive to Disneyland and came across a bag of gum-balls "cleverly" called 'Rain-blo". The kanima got a kick out of this and had to pose in his "good dicking kanima" pose. It's offensive, but forgivable because look at that adorable baby lizard! (He also has a toxin he'll use against you if you insult him, so best stay on his good side and only shower him with compliments).

RAIN-BLO SNOWBALLS BUBBLE GUM Soooo ready to love this, I was! What a perfect, perfect stocking stuff this would be, I thought, for allllll of those I hold nearest and dearest to my gum-loving heart! What fun we'd all have biting into these funny little things on Christmas morn! And the bubble-blowing contests! DEAR ME, the bubble-blowing contests we could have!!!! ALAS... THIS GUM DREAM DOES NOT COME TRUE. And even worse... these gumballs are like the things of gum NIGHTMARES. While the concept is a thing of genius, the execution of said genius is WAY questionable. These are just gumballs with outer coating that makes them look like snowballs. DUH, you're saying! I knew that, too (don't be so cheeky!). But that outer shell is, like, capable of breaking teeth. And it's also so sweet and sugary that it will no doubt also make you feel like you're sentencing your teethers to a grisly fate. It's concept-y and cute, you say! I AGREE. But, damn, this isn't being inflicted on the owners of any of the Christmas stockings in my near vicinity any time soon... Flavor Strength: 5 Comments: I love a good gumball, but these are subpar. Maybe it's all that candy coating added into the mix... Flavor Endurance: 4 Comments: All aboarddddd... first stop, Spit-Out City! Final thought: Packaging and apperance, though? TOP NOTCH. Nice try, Rain-Blo!

RAIN-BLO BUBBLE GUM BALLS Gumballs are just so much fun. They have that really uncomfortable first few bites when they feel impenetrable/awful and then they give way to gooey, soft bubble gum that always tastes soooo delicious! When I was a kid, my sister had a gumball machine and I don't remember howwwwww many coins I sunk into that thing (and/or how much money my sister made off of me! pft!), but I just loved that gum so much (even after it got hard and disgusting and OLD, which, let's face it, happened pretty early on). Rain-Blo keeps gumball dreams alive to the masses, and it does an allllllll right job of it. Bein' heavy on nostalgia works wonnnnnders for your credbility in my eyes, apparently, and therefore Rain-Blo gets a passing grade (though the ORANGE flavor seriously tastes like gawd-awful cough syrup at first chew). Here's a question though... we've come a long way in the gum industry since the advent of the gumball, right? Wouldn't it be possible to market gumballs again that are, like, made of gum that isn't half-gross? Couldn't we combine the technology (YES, I said TECHNOLOGY) that we have that produces, say, Extra Dessert Delights Mint Chocolate Chip and CONTAIN IT IN A GUMBALL? Doesn't that sound magical? Surely somewhere this is happening, but I want it on the mass market. PLEASE? Flavor Strength: 7 Comments: Aside from the orange balls, the flavors in the 4-pack seen above are pretty tasty... in that over-the-top, sugary fruit flavor sorta way. Flavor Endurance: 5 Comments: This one is tough to grade because the FLAVOR (grape, cherry, lemon, orange) goes away pretty quickly, but it leaves behind BUBBLE GUM which is a flavor in itself. I give it an OK, if only for about ten minutes. Final thought: Where's Willy Wonka when I need him? SERIOUSLY.