Why do I have so many fic ideas right now, and no energy to write them? 😭 Bless me with some creative juices, please!
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Why do I have so many fic ideas right now, and no energy to write them? 😭 Bless me with some creative juices, please!

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Not to be morbid on main but the queue function make it as such that you could literally be dead and your mutuals will only notice you're offline after a few days. Oh and don't get me started on the schedule function. I for one have at least one post for the year 2032...
You know what I'm going to queue this post just to prove a point lmao ))))))
Albus Severus should’ve been named Arthur Rubeus instead.
JUST SAYIN’
Distortion is Everywhere (at the End of Time)
-video essay script-
(incomplete, I found this on my computer)
Introduction:
Distortion in art has fascinated me for a long time. I usually dislike modern art (or at least what we usually think of as “modern art”), and I can barely stomach horror of any kind. Ironically, however, one of my favourite pieces of media, Everywhere at the End of Time by The Caretaker, is in every sense a piece of modern art, and also quite a creepy musical experience. In this video I will discuss many pieces of art and/or artistic experiments involving distortion, especially those that transmit a feeling in between creepy and melancholic.
The Timeline:
I will approach different types of distortion, particularly in audio and video format, in the order that I first discovered them, and at the end I will relate them back to EATEOT, as I feel there are many parallels.
Reversed songs:
The first such videos I remember watching are various songs I knew, but the audio was reversed, such as The Saltwater Room by Owl City. [give video example of the original and the reversed part] Of course, many used such reversed songs either for finding hidden messages (either for scary or comedic purposes), but as soon as I learned those weren`t true, I was able to enjoy the melody as it was, and I found it quite fascinating that a melody could sound just as good reversed, despite the obvious distortion, especially of the vocals. And, depending on the song, it could sound sadder or happier than the original. [give video example Dear You from Higurashi]
Later on, I would discover that some songs used reversed parts, usually of instruments, for their intros, and I recently made a few videos in which I un-reversed the songs so as to uncover what they originally sounded like. [give video examples]
Reversed segments appear in the post-awareness stages of EATEOT, and a prominent reversed progression is played in The End by C418.
Very slowed-down songs:
The next type of videos I came across were songs slowed down by 800% to even 2000%. My favourite one was Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap, slowed 8 times, using Paul-stretch on Audacity. This normally sad song (with an end portion mostly known as a meme [video example]) became an almost ambient piece, amplifying those seconds which sounded the most beautiful, making them seem like a glorious choir. [video example] Obviously, it also has many uncanny moments, as the original itself, but now stretches over many more seconds. [video example] Indeed, this prolonging of time was both the advantage and the disadvantage of this technique. There are many other slowed down songs which rather sound scary than anything else. [screenshot examples: Call Me Maybe, X-Files, etc] As a final example, Inspector Norse by Todd Terje, slowed down 20 times becomes absolutely unrecognizable, going from an upbeat house/ electro track to a 2-hour long ambient piece, perceived by many commenters to sound like sea waves.
The extreme slowing down of samples is mostly used in the post-awareness stages of EATEOT, especially the creepy siren segment of H1, but also earlier in stage 3, and later in stage 6.
Generation Loss
Funnily enough, it was through the Steamed Hams meme that I learned what generation loss is. [give video example] It was at this point in time that I became interested in the use of distortion in art, whereas previously I treated the subject more like a morbid curiosity. For a quick definition, generation loss entails making copies of copies of copies, many times, or many “generations”, which depending on where the video was stored (VHS, CD, DVD, etc), the quality will decrease gradually, or very fast. In the case of VHS tapes, it only takes about 15-20 generations to completely destroy the information on the tape, whereas on DVD, for example, even after 50 generations the video still has some semblance of shape and colour, for example. [video examples] This, of course, applies to audio only and picture only files. Pictures, however, are rather resilient, as it takes thousands of generations of copies for them to degrade significantly. This is noticeable, for example, in Pinterest photos that look grainy, because Pinterest, and not only, works in such a way that each time a picture is pinned, a copy is created. I recently did such an experiment on my channel. [video example]
Now, moving beyond the merely technical side, generation loss feels very much like a metaphor for forgetting, or even one for death, and there is something more bittersweet than it would ever be creepy. Of course, these images and sounds are distorted and unsettling, but much more than that, they feel like… loss itself. Such a method has been used a long time ago, by Alvin Lucier in his album I am Sitting in a Room, in which he recorded himself in a room, then played the recording in front of the recorder and so on, the final song becomes very wavy and abstract. Now, his purpose was to discover the underlying frequencies of the human voice, not necessarily explore degradation, but his work has a lot in common with the generation loss videos.
This is, from a certain point of view, a natural distortion, whereas EATEOT is a synthetic (albeit naturalistic) one. Another example of natural distortion used artistically would be The Degradation Loops by William Basinski. [video exmple]
The End by C418 vs EATEOT
The End by C418 (and other Minecraft music)
I didn`t really pay attention to Minecraft music as I was playing it when younger, but more recently I took an interest in the End music, which is very complex and intriguing. While the tracks from Volume Alpha are nostalgic and calm, and most of the others in Volume Beta are either electronic ambiental or progressive house, this one is very unique in its length, structure and mood. What begins as a glitched tape or vinyl playing the track Minecraft, continues as an increasingly jumbled mess of sounds and bits and pieces of memories from many previous Volume Alpha songs, some more easily recognizable than others. This is a genius use of musical motifs, producing an eerily nostalgic feeling throughout. There is an almost heartbreaking segment at about …, where Dry Hands plays faintly, going off-key, as if a memory was fighting to survive, or the horrors encountered by the character in the Ender dimension are so overwhelming that even happy recollections become tainted. The clearest sample is Sweden, played in an epic, triumphant version, but even that is drowned out by the noise. At the end, at least in this particular video, the screen fades to black, but the music is more than mere static. There are many sounds heard here, from electric buzzing, to inverted notes and finally a crescendo drone leading to the same tune as at the very beginning, looped, then finally stopped by somebody turning off the pick-up and leaving in the distance. One could only wonder what that means, symbolically. Maybe it was just a dream, or maybe it represents the escape from the Ender Dragon, or something else entirely. It is indeed a track that invites reflection, as is clearly seen in the many poetic and philosophical comments. My favourite one is this [show comment], which describes Steve`s journey away from home, forgetting everything about home. It was this that ultimately led me to find EATEOT.
Everywhere at the End of Time by Leyland Kirby
EATEOT is the final project of Leyland Kirby under the pen name The Caretaker. This 6-album journey represents the mental decline of an Alzheimer’s patient. I found this video in my recommended list about a year ago, and it struck me as the best, and most meaningful piece of modern art ever, hands down. The amount of attention to detail is quite astounding, especially once you reach the post-awareness stages, where every form of distortion previously discussed is used together, and every previous song is reused, representing the most accurate possible rendition of the experience of forgetting.
The two compared
There are very many parallels between EATEOT and The End by C418, both in theme and execution. Both use previous songs as samples, usually quite distorted ones, to signify memories before a certain tragic separation from reality (EATEOT: Alzheimer`s, The End: going into the Ender Portal and leaving home seemingly forever), now shredded to pieces. Both have clarity or so-called bliss segments in their most chaotic moments, and also representations of terminal lucidity. Overall, The End has a very post-awareness feel to it, sometimes more like stage 4, stage 5 or even stage 6 at one point.
More marginal similarities include: the motif of Ending, finality in their titles, the fact that they are the longest tracks in their respective projects. Last but not least, I cannot help but notice that in Minecraft there is this team of Notch, C418 and …, a group of experimental artists who were also friends, and in EATEOT there is the duo Leyland Kirby – Ivan Seal, both modern artists who are also friends.
EATEOT compared to everything else
While I think that the biggest similarity is between those two, there are also great parallels between EATEOT and generation loss, with the defining difference that generation loss has more of a focus on the technical side of things, and it is a more “natural” type of distortion. However, the overarching theme is still there, namely memory and the lack thereof. Of course, the musical series the most similar to generation loss is The Disintegration Loops by William Basinski, which was at first created on accident, as he wanted to transfer his loops to a digital format, but the tape ended up gradually wearing off.
temptation tuesday
rules: share something about an idea you have/something that's speaking to you/an au you'd like to see and are considering writing/etc. etc. Basically anything that is tempting you away from your current wips!
tagged by @thebuckley-hans and @madneysjee ❤️
1. Buckley Siblings Ghost Whisperer AU! Now this is definitely happening, and is in the planning stages but it does keep distracting me from finishing the WIP I want to get out soon 🤣
2. Almost 2 years ago, I started a 911: What If series and only published one fanfiction! I really want to get back to that and one idea that has been in the works since late 2021, is a Season 4 AU where May decided to become a firefighter instead of a dispatcher.
3. Same 'what if' series as the one above, this time an AU where Eddie and Maddie are a part of Season 1, instead of Buck, his absence becomes a huge mystery they have to solve.
4. I have a 6x10 time loop fic on my mind, where Chimney keeps reliving the day, and is deadset on saving Buck, but nothing he is doing is working.
I'm pretty sure most people have been tagged at this point, so please do this if you want, I'd love to see ❤️

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My brain sometimes behaves like an 8 year old. It hides behind things and jumps out at me in the hopes of messing me up. One of its favorite
Getting to know you Meme
1) Where were you born?
2) What’s your fave food?
3) Fave color?
4) Favorite way to spend a day off?
5) What color is your underwear right now?
6) Rainy days or snow days?
7) What color is your sky?
8) If you could own any pet, what would it be and why?
9) If you were a car, what would you be?
10) Have you ever been in love?
11) What’s the last thing you ate?
12) Dancing or drinking?
13) Can you cook?
14) Do you have any siblings?
15) Are your parents still married?
16) Most embarrassing moment?
17) Read the book or watch the movie?
18) Team Edward or team Jacob? Or team they can both do better than her?
19) Is the glass half empty or half full?
20) Do you currently have a crush on anyone?
21) What first draws you to someone?
22) Most romantic thing someone can do for you?
23) Ever gone skinny dipping?
24) Do you think we are alone in the universe?
25) Jack & Jill or Dick & Jane?
26) Do you still watch cartoons?
27) Your worst habit?
28) Have you ever given up sleep just to talk to someone until all hours of the night?
29) Cats or dogs?
30) Walk or ride?
31) How tall are you?
32) What color are your eyes?
33) If you could meet one person who’s passed on, who would it be and why?
34) What are you wearing right now?
35) What color are your shocks right now?
36) Is there such things as ghosts?
37) If someone confessed to you, would you be happy or annoyed?
38) Do you have a ‘bucket list’?
39) Have you ever crushed on someone and not told them?
40) Have you ever been out of the country?
41) Favorite vacation spot?
42) Do you dance like nobody’s watching, or dance like you’re having a seizure?
43) White or dark or milk chocolate?
44) Do you crush/fall in love easily?
45) Are you a flirt?
46) Do you believe in 2nd chances?
47) Do you ever want to get married?
48) Ever kissed someone upside down?
49) Ever been Rick Rolled? Do you even know what that means?
50) Are you shy?