anywho one thing i think about a lot in regards to weird route queen (or i guess no-mercy route queen in general, or whatever the dr equivalent to that is called) that's always stood out to me is how absolutely like. freaked out she gets at the sudden prospect of Being Alone out of nowhere
because queen's USED to being around People. extremely used to it, even. she's at the peak of her "purpose" as a darkner and gets constant attention from lightners as the library's "state-of-the-art" public use laptop. and even then she's got legions of staff worshipping her every move and keeping her company. she has endless attention and company, and it's just what she's used to! what she's always been used to!
but suddenly all of that just. kind of disappears. even in normal route, it's said that the reason queen became so "extreme" is that she lost her internet access. suddenly, inexplicably, she can't get online. what are the implications of something like that, for a darkner? for a darkner who's been used to nothing but an endless stream of attention and use from those little gods in the world beyond? i doubt queen ever really thought about the possibility of losing that, because why would she? why would SHE lose it? she's queen! she's optimal and perfect and smart and cool. and entirely self-confident. she never even considered her novelty wearing off and YET, all of a sudden she's lost one of her main "uses" due to something entirely out of control. that isn't fair. that's weird. surely the lightners will stick around though, right? they've got to. they have to. she's her. she has a million other things going for her, and besides, sheβs making their utopia regardless. She knows whatβs best for them, sheβs always known whatβs best for them, and sheβs the only one who can bring it. there's no way this would cause that attention to waver, right?
but THEN it really gets to a point in weird route because suddenly, it's not just this looming threat, this strange unseen anxiety of falling to the bottom of this fucked up hierarchy of servitude and subjugation like every darkner before you, this warning foreboding in the distance, everybody ELSE is gone now too. there are no swatchlings, there's no tasque manager, no regular tasque or whatever else, there's only you. you alone with nothing. nothing and nobody and HOLY SHIT how are you supposed to deal with it?? going from being at home basking in constant attention and company from others to this unfamiliar place where almost everybody you've ever known is notably ABSENT- something you never would have conceived happening to YOU, who's perfect and amazing and beloved, is FUCKED and she DOESN'T know how to deal with it. she's doing SO SO bad in there
LIKE SHE MISSES HOME!! SHE MISSES HER GUYS!! SHE MISSES BEING LOVED AND ADORED AND KNOWN!! AND SHE DOESN'T HAVE THAT ANYMORE AND SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
it really does stand out to me because queen's the only like. main darkner boss thus far who is at the "peak" of this intended arc of attention and use and servitude whatever that darkners are supposed to undergo. king's been at rock bottom long enough to grow bitter over it, while tenna has slowly faded from being loved into obscurity. queen's still at the top, mostly. and due to the nature of who she is, how she is, and her own self image, she thought that'd never change.
but it did here. it did so suddenly and so violently and so cruelly due to factors completely out of her own control, like it did most other darkners. in this route she's lost everybody and it truly is prominent to me just how she acts when that's suddenly thrust upon her, this idea of being abandoned with nobody out of absolutely nowhere. she doesn't know what to do with herself. she spends her time just standing in an unfurnished box staring at a wall. instead of acting like... well, queen, she's just so hauntingly quiet and lonely and confused and hurt. and it SUCKS
