#proprocrastinator

A WEEK BEFORE ASSIGNMENT IS DUE:

In order to procrastinate like a pro, a week before the assignment is due, have a conversation with yourself. Tell yourself things like, “...HAH! Seven days of working on this thing is plenty of time,” and, “I’ve done a paper in, like, four hours. This’ll be a piece of cake!” 

6 DAYS BEFORE ASSIGNMENT IS DUE:

You’ll probably have one of these conversations:

“Hey, Jess, did you do that assignment for Writing?”

Assignment? What assignment?! God, I hope it isn’t due soo- “You mean, the one that’s due next Monday?”

“Yeah, I always like to get a head start though.”

“Mannnn, you got me stressin’ and no I haven’t. We still have 6 days to get it done!”

5 DAYS BEFORE ASSIGNMENT IS DUE:

*BINGE WATCH TV*

4 AND 3 DAYS BEFORE ASSIGNMENT IS DUE:

Spend these days lying to yourself about how close the deadline is and how long it’ll take to do the assignment. 

2 DAYS BEFORE ASSIGNMENT IS DUE:

Finally look at the assignment and tell yourself that it’ll take no time to get done. Then put the thing away until about 4 hours before the assignment is due. 

FOUR HOURS BEFORE ASSIGNMENT IS DUE:

Have a mini panic attack before reciting things like, “I can do this!,” and “This’ll be easy” while rocking back and forth in the fetal position. 

FINAL STAGE:

Turn the assignment in three days late. Like this blog post. 

Hello fellow classmates and avid Palm Springs attendee! I hope you all had an amazing Labor Day weekend and enjoyed eating hot dog sausages at any gathering that was held in that period of time.

In lieu of such nationalistic views, I must say that argument is used by a society that “values democracy and equity” (64). This quote comes from University of Tennessee English professor Rebecca Jones’ publication “Finding the Good Argument OR Wh Bother with Logic.” The need for a “good argument” would call for logic, or the lack thereof in many arguments that we may find ourselves in today. Pressing issues are to be resolved only when both sides of an argument now what it is that they are arguing about and are passionate about the cause that they believe in. It takes a lot to pursue one side and not think about the other. The use of counterarguments provides for a solution to that specific problem for I think that in order to debate a crucial topic one must understand both sides of it and be open to multiple perspectives. Otherwise, opponents would just be ignorant as information from the counterpart comes in one ear and out through the other. An example being news shows when “prepared speeches are hurled across the long distances” (62) rather than actually engaging in the skirmish to resolve the conflict. This metaphorical war provides for two sides and no middle ground, which only means that progress would be at a standstill until a compromise is made. Like Jones stated, news shows would be considered as a “four ring circus” where the host as analogous to the ringmaster and the other three political advocates would be the lion, trapeze artist, and fat lady who sings until the show is done. I’m not saying that it does not make for good media, but there is a shift of focus from actual politics to entertainment. The video of Jon Stewart on Crossfire would basically replicate what I said in actuality for he calls out the hosts for putting politicians on edge with their ethics in the way they deliver their questions. How do you call that for “fake news?”

Alternatively, Jones may be appealing to her primary audience of first-year university writing students with certain devices that I have seen throughout reading the introduction. At first glance, one may notice that the diction used in the publication is similar to that of a first-year college student’s vocabulary. Her reading would well be in the range of what we are capable of understanding due to prior knowledge or context. I could tell that she would try to make the transitional period from high school to college a great one. Along with diction is the use of a political cartoon, which in my case shows how she can portray her argument with a cat fight. Terminology is implied to the point where a basic human being would be able to discern what the main idea of the text is about: argument. One last thing that Jones might have used to appeal to us would be the use of the television sitcom The Brady Bunch in relation to our age and generation where “Netflix and Chill” was relevant for a time. More like “Hulu & Commitment” if you would have asked me!

Well, I would like to thank all two of you(if not more) who took the time to read this saucy sausage post and have a wonderful rest of your day & night!

DISCLAIMER: I accidentally erased my first version of this blog post so hopefully I can get by with this new and improved one