#proj moon

Perspective of Jia Qiu to love interpretation

Jia Qiu is not used to the feeling of fondness. 

He doesn't think of romance or has the time to think about another person in that way, not when he is so busy juggling with the complicated situation surrounding himself and the City . Romance in the city is dead. How could two people find themselves together when the situations around themselves are so uncertain? When there's more looming death than there is blooming of life ? 

He had seen tragedies more often in his life than happy endings. Only those fortunate enough, only those with enough power, strength and inner prowess have the ability to test such waters. People of the backstreets , the people of Hongyuan , even his own Kong Family — a family he cared for, where he found tranquility and happiness had been taken away from him in a blink of an eye.

Therefore Jia Qiu does not let himself drown in those fairytales. He doesn't believe in love but he cares deeply for those who are around him. He cares enough to make an effort to not let them lose their paths on his watch and makes sure no harm falls their way.

Jia Qiu is noble in his existence and wise. He cares for people, and he sees the fragile threads that hold them together far more clearly than most. Where others only see someone show weakness or foolishness, he sees past their surface layers into their existing wounds and their fear trying to survive in a cruel city.

Perhaps that is why he refuses to let the people around him fall. Not out of obligation but because he understands too well how easily a single moment of despair can change the course of a life and lead them to ruins. Experiencing and witnessing the circumstances where people turn into monsters and trillions disappear over a course of one night. Promising youths allowing grief and anger to rot their hearts until nothing remains but bitterness.

Jia Qiu is familiar with that path too well , especially when he himself has walked dangerously close to it but managed to stop himself from getting swallowed by a city that never cared whether they lived or died.

Jia Qiu stands , watching the people fall and lose their lives on the Restructuring day. People screaming, not being able to do anything while watching their loved ones getting thrown off and crushed. Yet amongst the entire crowd his eyes fall upon one vehicle. One vehicle safe from all the problems and destruction — which he doesn't expect much from. The one vehicle carrying the small child with heterochromatic eyes leaning out of the vehicle fervently and frantically begging the older relative to let him save one life. Just one life. At least one life. Something shifts in his heart upon that action.

“……”

Jia Qiu knows he cannot control and change the fate of the City. He cannot change the chain of destruction and the fate of the lives already lost. He cannot bring them back or bring more destruction to avenge them.

Therefore, as the scene of the privileged cyan eyes who most of his family or the great family despises or envies flashes before his eyes , he gets the courage to choose differently. (Or he gets the idea of something he could choose differently. )

He holds a lot of grief in his heart for all the loved ones he lost , a lot of suppressed anger and the desire to avenge them. To burn the people who caused him so much anguish and pain, but if he follows the same path of letting the rage consume him whole , would there be any difference between the ones that wronged him and the ones he would wrong?

It's not an easy decision by any means. A part of Jia Qiu wishes to quench the thirst for revenge. To cut anyone's tongue who wrongs him and the ones living in the city, unfairly.

Hence he leaves Hongyuan in search of the meaning of life.

And as years passed by and he finally finds it and returns , Jia Qiu understands the choice within his reach. He cannot chose for the people who have their own choices. He cannot help those who go seeking for death with their wild actions with unfathomable reasons. He understands that he needs to take a life to do what's right and realises he needs to save or spare one when mercy is needed. 

He still loathes those who wronged his family. Who wronged him and killed innocents but eventually decides and learns to let go. He finally understands that he cannot save everyone , neither can be completely destroy in the name of revenge. 

He finally realises that ...

.....if he cannot save the world or avenge the ones who were wronged, then he can at least stand guard or attempt to protect the small circle of lives that fate places within his reach. That he will guide them when they stray, steady them when they falter, and pull them back from the edge when grief threatens to swallow them whole. 

The main goal of his family was to bring a positive change for the better of Hongyuan. To make it a place worth living, not only for those who were unprivileged, but also for the ones who were privileged so they would use the powers they acquired for the rightful purpose.

Jia Qiu doesn't always believe in happy endings because he knows how easily they disappear. Not every outcome of struggle or hard work is always bright. 

And he might not have time to ponder upon the concept of love or fondness but if he has any ways to express it , then it's not in the form of dreams or empty words or physical affection.