#professionally done

First of all, it should be said that Tony Stark had at least two PhD’s, an argument could be made for four if you truly counted soft sciences, and Tony Stark Knew His Shit. 

There were four things he knew for sure: 

1.) Rhodey was his best friend for life 

2.) Quoting “mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell” to Pepper when she was drunk would never not be funny 

3.) You weren’t supposed to order three mimosas at a baby shower (thanks for the late advice, Jane) 

4.) He did not like the art teacher Steven Grant Rogers 

It all started when Mr. Kirby retired, Tony didn’t cry at this, and they had to look for a new art teacher. And they find a new art teacher who has biceps that could probably crush watermelons and a smile that melted the devil. 

Tony did not yelp and run into a wall. 

Or notice that Steve offered to help him up and gave a little smile that could’ve burned rocket fuel. 

And he definitely didn’t fall in love in about five minutes after Steve looks at him for maybe a millisecond and says that Tony’s Mona Lisa tie with the mustache on it is “cool.” 

“That’s your least-cool tie,” Clint says. Tony sniffs and turns. “Your coolest one is the one Natasha got you that says ‘life is nothing but robots and smiles.’ I like that one, why don’t you wear it?” 

“Because you like it.” 

“One of these days you’ll admit that you love me.” 

“This year is not that year.” 

“I didn’t say year!” 

“Point still stands.” 

Sure, Tony comes into the art room for lunch because they have nearly the same schedule and Steve doesn’t come into the staff room because he thinks Principal Fury is scary. 

“He wears an eyepatch Tony, how isn’t that creepy?” 

“Because he attends literally every musical showcase that we’ve ever done and cries if anyone sings Phantom of the Opera music. He’s soft like that.” Steve laughs. Tony smiles back and laughs a little, and no. He doesn’t think Steve looks cute. Or that he should ask him on a date. It’s stupid. 

He has a freak-out about feelings at midnight when he’s drinking a glass of wine. 

“Natasha, I need help.” 

“You called me. I was asleep. This better not be about your existential crisis among technology.” 

“It’s not that yet. It’s about emotions.” 

“Repress them.” 

“Natasha, that’s really unhealthy and you shouldn’t do that.” 

“Half of your problems solve themselves if people think you don’t care.” 

“THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS NAT OH MY GOD.” 

“So what? You’re a weakling? Sad. Spill, what is making the man sad?” 

“I kind of like Steve Rogers and I’m having a crisis because liking people is stupid and his entire face is fucking stupid and his organization of grades is literally the worst system ever and he won’t let me fix anything about it, and--” 

“Tony?” 

“Yes?” 

“I’m not dealing with this. Either do something about it or don’t.” 

“I’m not going to do anything about it.” 

“That’s unhealthy.” 

“You were literally talking about repressing your emotions, like, five seconds ago how are you able to give me advice?” 

“You called me asking for advice, likely because if you mess up Pepper’s REM cycle she will destroy you and anything surrounding. Including your little desk toys that you say you aren’t emotionally attached to.” 

“If you tell any of my kids this I will sue you so hard your head will fall off.” 

“Why do you think I wear chokers all the time? It keeps me together.” Tony snorts. “But Tony, in all seriousness. You like him. You should do something about it.” 

“I think not.” 

“Fine then, don’t call me. Call Rhodey and have him say the exact thing.” 

“Hmm. No.” 

“Bye.” The phone call ends with a click. 

Tony stays up until three a.m. He decides that liking someone is entirely too much trouble and should be avoided at all costs. 

No one told Steve this, and he shows up to Tony’s room in a patterned button-up with stars all over it and the sleeves are rolled up--the sleeves are rolled up--and Tony can’t speak. 

“Hey, I seem to have lost my grading pen, did I leave it in here?” He asks. Tony fumbles around at his desk before throwing an electric blue pen at Steve’s head and ushering him out with a nervous laugh and a throwaway line. 

“Do you and Mr. Rogers have a thing?” One student, Kamala asks. “Because I could see it.” 

“Kamala, what have we said about questions pertaining to my personal life?” 

“That you haven’t answered one since college?” 

“Exactly. I’m trying to break a Guinness World Record.” The class snickers as Tony waxes poetic about angles and how science was actually not superior to math, which explained everything about science. Dr. Banner could choke. 

Pepper hosts an end-of-the-school-year party in May, on the twenty-seventh. Tony tells Steve to go, because Pepper makes cream cheese roll-ups that are to die for, and there is even talk about Clint bringing his fruit punch again, which makes him redeemable. 

“I don’t get what you have against that guy,” Steve says. 

“He doesn’t have anything against me,” Clint responds. “He just thinks I’m not human. Which is a fair point.” 

“Are you?” 

“Pfft, I dunno. One time I woke up in a pile of Cheeto dust and a phone number. I called the phone number, it was for the CIA. That’s the reason I took off a week in December.” Steve manages to look mildly surprised, but then tells Clint about how they’re all pretty sure Bucky works for the CIA because he keeps mentioning Roswell, and only Rhodey and Wilson know about that one. Maybe.

As it turns out, inviting Steve to the summer party was a horrible idea because he’s wearing an actual t-shirt and shorts and shit he looks really good. Like, Cher in Moonstruck good. shit. 

Tony manages to say “THERE’S PUNCH” and then downs about two glasses and tries to put on AC/DC songs for the rest of the night. 

“You are so fucking useless,” Rhodey whispers. “Just talk with him.” 

Just Talking With Steve is Not Just Talking. Because Steve is Nice and Attractive and Has a Nice Sense of Humor. 

And maybe Tony wants to kiss him on the cheek. And maybe Tony laughs so hard he snorts when Steve does an impression of the school board director Pierce. And yeah, maybe he thinks he develops a heart condition when Steve hugs him goodbye and Steve smells like fresh soap and laundry and paint. 

They hang out a lot over the summer. Steve paints a lot; it’s his side job. His paintings are good, and Steve even lets Tony see the before of it all. Tony shows Steve his ideas for robots and his dreams about random things. They listen to old forties records and loud rock hits. 

Clint’s the one who points it out. 

“You guys started dating!” He says. Steve raises an eyebrow. 

“Huh?” 

“You went out to dinner last night.” 

“To discuss school,” Tony says. 

“You had wine, you were so not discussing school. You were probably bitching about the problem kids.” 

“Still school-related,” Tony butts in. 

“You have also stayed over at each other’s houses.” 

“Apartments,” Steve offers. “And driving home at three a.m.? In this economy? No thank you.” 

“You have clothes at his house, Tony,” Natasha adds. 

“Convenience, I am lazy,” Tony says. “Natasha is slandering my name.” 

“Is it really slander if both of you want to share a bed and make love or whatever cheesy shit it is that you do?” Steve and Tony look at each other. 

They do hang out more frequently. Tony got rid of his dating app. (Not like it was helpful anyway.) Steve had planned a picnic. 

“Son of a bitch, we are dating,” Steve says. “Okay wow, I had plans for this. They were good plans.” 

“Please tell me you weren’t gonna play Ed Sheeran.” 

“You think I was going to...? I have romantic standards, and they are set very low, Tony. You know this. Wanna go get eggrolls after this?” 

Okay so I’ve been wanting to color my hair for a while but don’t have the money to go get it actually done by my salon person. So here are some links from Amazon. If you have tried any of these brands, please let me know. Why you like or why you hate it. First up: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0147RUWW2/ref=cm_sw_r_oth_api_t0P0zb9M7546C Second up:…