#prettyandfunny

While re-watching Ted Lasso with my parents, I thought about Brett Goldstein and his comedy show, “Brett Goldstein Grew Up in A Strip Club” about his time co-running a strip club with his fucking father. My life is just as interesting. Today? It is not. I was meant to fly back to NJ today, and lug all of my pretty-city belongings back to NYC on Tuesday. I live on the mother-fucking Upper West Side in PENTHOUSE A! PHA LADIES! Why am I so afraid of going back? 

So, why not me? Why not write again, and why not one day star in my own single-cam smash hit? I spend my nights watching Succession and Grey’s Anatomy, is that not enough? I submit auditions to the void, I work at my dad’s finance company. I do my daily workouts, and I eat the same foods every day. I’m so fucking interesting! I speak freaking Italian (conversationally)!!! I want to be friends with Tik Tok star Eli Rallo! 

I’ve got no advice, I’ve got nothing sound and fabulous to offer. But I do think my life is funny and I can tell it in a funny manner. My boyfriend lives far away, and sometimes it’s all relative because Brooklyn from the UWS feels just as far from Burlington to UWS: both weekend trips. 

I am definitely insane. My therapist listed indecision as a symptom of my anxiety, but the one thing I am sure of is that I am insane. I’m fucking funny though/too.