Apr 13, 2023
Okay but imagine a robot girl....whose a container for slime girlboy, who has a braingirl suspended in them. And they all live together and work together as one.
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Okay but imagine a robot girl....whose a container for slime girlboy, who has a braingirl suspended in them. And they all live together and work together as one.
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Two things
I have heard people complain about but I haven’t personally encountered:
1. People trauma ranking. Honestly I don’t think I have significant trauma that would warrant OSDD. I have not found people agreeing with me on that though. I have found people telling me that my experiences matter and that abuse is abuse.
2. Endogenics asking to take up space in traumatogenic community or even following me even though I do not have a DNI for endogenics. Maybe I haven’t been around long enough or been in the right spaces but I personally haven’t seen endogenics trying to claim traumatogenic space. I have seen bad behavior where some endogencis were abusive towards traumatogentics, but this has been two people, which is hardly representative of a community. Apparently I’m more interested in endogenics than they are in me. I guess I’m just fascinated with this idea of plurality because I’m technically a system but I feel that I’m a singlet. Endogenic experience seems to be the exact opposite of what I experience (e.g., no trauma background and a non-experience of plurality). I suppose I could create tulpas to try to feel more plural (but only if I were under the tutelage of someone experienced with creating tulpas from the tradition they came from, and only if there seemed to be a call from the beyond human world to do so, which seems unlikely for an aetheist to get) but tulpas are entities that are created or invited in to one’s mental space, they aren’t fracturing of one’s identity, so I still have no idea what traumatogenic plurality feels like, even though I technically am plural and traumaotgenic.
Does that last sentence sound complicated? LOL It’s supposed to. Welcome to my weird world. Anyhow I truly am interested in endogenic experiences and syscourse and don’t feel triggered reading syscourse unless someone is obviously being abusive (which has only happened two times) but the conversations seem to allude me. A friend said that she thought this may be because I’m the opposite of endogencis (e.g., a traumatogenic system who does not identify as a system) but who the fuck knows.
Anyhow, I am grateful that I haven’t had these experiences although I would like to learn more about what it is like to be endogenic. To anyone who would say my trauma was insignificant I’m likely to agree. I have this OSDD-1a diagnosis but I don’t identify as having trauma even though I’m told that my experiences were trauma, and I don’t identify as being a system so it’s oftentimes a mystery to me why I am where I am. I remain mystified about why no endogenic systems have tried to interact with me. Apparently I’m just a stodgy old guy who is traumatogenic but doesn’t identify as having a system so maybe this makes me ultra extra boring. Oh LOL I actually do have an 80 something year old member of my system who has some thoughts about this, but he just kinda doesn’t give a fuck about anything because he’s Crotchedy Old Man. So yeah, sorry this ins rambly but that’s my state of affairs.
Research day!
So, today we’re spending most of our time reading through posts on Tumblr about systems, duality, plurality, and other type things that help us understand more of what we have and connect with other such beings who have more than one consciousness in their being. If you want to ask us questions about our experience, please do! We love talking and would love to connect. Also, if you have any newbie/youngling tips you feel like you want to share, we’d love that! Other than that, down the rabbit hole we go!
~Ryn & Jade