Here to announce that the brain has, in fact, chosen violence and latched onto the following muses with its awful little raccoon hands. these are the ones currently chewing through drywall in my skull, demanding attention, plot, suffering, tenderness, disaster, and someone to PLEASE perceive them.

some of them do not get loved on nearly enough, which is a crime. a genuine injustice. a personal insult to me and the haunted swamp i call a blog. alexander excluded only because he is new and has, understandably, been yelling the loudest.

so, in no particular order except the order in which they are actively ruining my life:

ALEXANDER FITZGERALD TBD / Bridgerton / SCREAMING IN MY HEAD a study in / an outsider in high society, regency era revolutionist, overcoming presumption, pomp, and circumstance alexander is not underloved solely because he is currently the newest shiny object in my brain and therefore has been sprinting through my skull in full regency boots. HOWEVER. if you want in on that energy? by all means. this man is all sharp edges under polish, rebellion dressed in finery, and “i know exactly how society sees me and i refuse to bow to it.”

GAR LOGAN Ryan Potter (Animated Available) / Teen Titans / Semi Active a study in / finding light in the darkness, surviving transformation, loyalty through it all shapeshifter. heart of the team. wild card. please, i am on my knees asking for more love for gar. he is all heart, all ache, all “i make it funny so you don’t notice i’m hurting.” give me friendships, give me found family, give me people who see the grief under the grin.

BERLIOZ BONFAMILE Dylan Minnette / Disney / Active a study in / quiet talent, unspoken grief, the weight of legacy reserved. refined. rebellious. he deserves SO much more attention than he gets and i am staring directly at the dash about it. give me soft things, tense family things, artistry, complicated expectations, the sadness of being the quiet one in a loud and glittering world.

MASON RIVERA Noah Centineo / OC (911 Verse) / Active a study in / sirens wailing, reckless heart, and staying when it’s hard human. first responder. loyal. mason is built out of loyalty and bad ideas and that particular flavor of love that says “i’m here, even when it hurts.” i need more of him immediately. give me emergencies, emotional collapse, found family, slow burn, ride or die dynamics, all of it.

VERSO Animated / Expedition 33 / Active a study in / control as survival, truth as a weapon, power kept deliberately close strategist. manipulator. moral wildcard. this one is for the people who like their dynamics a little sharp around the edges. verso is SO fun to write and deserves more people willing to get weird with power, tension, mind games, shifting loyalties, and the question of whether he’s helping or making everything worse.

LUKA DEVEREUX Leo Woodall / OC (The Originals) / Active a study in / secrets that fester, beauty as a weapon, and the thrill of survival witch-blooded. con artist. irredeemably charming. luka should be in ten thousand more threads than he is. he’s dangerous, magnetic, slippery, and exactly the kind of man who smiles while setting the room on fire. give me supernatural politics, bad decisions, flirtation with teeth, enemies, allies, marks, and people who absolutely should not trust him but do.

BAZ GARZA Luke Pasqualino / OC / Active a study in / things that go bump in the night, talking to the dead, hating a gift psychic. investigator. pessimistic. BAZ MY BELOVED MISERABLE BASTARD. if you like haunted men, burnout, dry humor, supernatural horror, ghosts, reluctant compassion, and someone who would rather bite you than admit he cares, come here. he deserves more love than i can say.

RORY BYRNE Max Thieriot / One Tree Hill / Semi Active a study in / alcoholism, post traumatic stress, self-destruction veteran. amputee. despondent. rory lives in that space where pain and tenderness keep missing each other by inches, and i need more people willing to get in the trenches with him. give me messy healing, relapse, grief, love that stays, friendship that refuses to quit, and all the ugly beautiful parts of survival.

NICK CALDER Jeremy Allen White / Stranger Things / Highly Active a study in / protecting those who cannot protect themselves, setting a good example, overcoming circumstance nick is one of the loudest muses in my head and i would LOVE more for him always. he’s grounded, loyal, rough around the edges in the best way, and built for protective dynamics, found family, trailer park loyalty, survival, and “i’ll handle it” energy even when he absolutely should not have to.

so yes. this is me gently, lovingly, ferally shaking the dash by the shoulders and saying: please come ask about these muses. please come plot. please come scream with me. please come make my life worse in the best possible way.