#pg 163

“Could you not stand over my shoulder like that?”

Getting a diagnosis never changed who I was. I had always been neurodivergent, and I always will be neurodivergent. So, in some ways, those words on that piece of paper that gave me an official, clinical name for myself didn't really change anything. But in other ways, it changed the world. Because now I understood who I was. Now, I had a better understanding that this weird, strange, crazy roller coaster that I was on wasn't a solo ride. I was now able to seek resources, and find community groups, and grow a deeper understanding of who I was. I was now able to see myself for the human I was, instead of the human I could never be.

Professor Cohen proffered a novel by Laura Ingalls Wilder called The Long Winter. "I've marked a particularly memorable passage. During a snowstorm, a pioneer family huddles together in their shack, unable to get warm. Pa begins to play the fiddle and tells his three daughters to dance. They giggle and prance, and this keeps them from freezing to death. Later, Pa must tend the livestock, or the animals will die. He holds on to the clothesline to make it to the barn. Inside, Ma holds her breath, waiting." When I took the novel, Professor Cohen covered my hands with her own. "We can't see what's coming. All we can do is hold the line."