#personal prndl

13. Do you get jealous easily?

uhhh yes and no? I definitely feel jealousy pretty easily with the people I like but I never say anything or act on it. I know it has more to do with my own insecurities than it does my crush or SO or whatever liking someone else. And hey, if they do like someone else better or they’re trying to make me jealous, then they’re not the person I want to be fucking with. I don’t chase people or convince people to like me. I’ve been doing that shit my whole fucking life. If you like me, cool let’s chill. If you like that other person better, cool I’ll see ya, bye.

16. Do you have any tattoos?

Not yet. IDK it’s really hard being an artist and wanting tattoos because the art I like changes so frequently that every time I choose something, I find it stupid 2 months later. Also I’m broke AF and paying my way through school. ALSO my parents always used to tell me “Never get tattoos!” not because they didn’t like them (they had a bunch) but because I come from a family of deviants so the lesson was “that’s how the cops easily identify you.”

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?

I’ve never written a song and I’ve never written a poem FOR someone. I’ve written plenty of poems ABOUT someone, but I’m honestly a shit writer so I just keep my shitty poems to myself.

47. How old are you?

8. Describe your crush

Well, he’s much taller than me considering I’m only like 5′4″. He’s really into music and architecture. He can cook and he can bake. He is really cute with some amazing hair and he’s really sweet even if he doesn’t think so. He dreams of having a cat just like me and he’s someone I can always talk to. We like so many of the same things and yet, he lives super far away from me... :( 

And somehow he thinks I’m cute... But he also thinks I’m really weird which is so truuuuuu

20. Do you shower every day?

9. Describe your perfect mate

My perfect mate would just be someone I could vibe with, laugh with, and grow with (aaand have a bunch of kinky sex with). They’d be goofy but also determined and ready to work together to make shit happen. I don’t think I could be with someone who just wanted me to take care of them or someone who was fine just settling for the sake of it being easy. I’m a person with big goals and aspirations and I need someone who gets that and wants not only for me to succeed but for both of us to be happy and working toward something we love. I think this is why I come off as intimidating when I try to date people my age. It’s as if they feel they can’t keep up or they’re not good enough for me (which is silly) because I have these big goals and I’m out here trying to make shit happen for myself. I want us to be two strong individuals. Perfection would be that PLUS they’d be into art, music, video games, smoking weed, late night discussions, reading, theatre, cats/animals etc. 

14.  Do you have a crush on anyone?

Yes i do

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?

We’re in the city and we start off by going out to dinner in a little hole-in-the-wall restaurant. The kind you have to walk down some old concrete stairs to get to and when you walk in the lighting is low and very warm and there are little candles on the tables. It’s not an expensive place but it’s intimate and comfortable. We laugh, eat, have a drink or two, flirt, talk about life, etc. Then we leave, smoke together, and go to a little art exhibit or a short theatre show together. Something fun that we can giggle to and maybe something a little risqué in topic choice. When that’s done, we go to a bar with a bunch of neon lights and some good music on where we talk and drink a little bit. After that, we go to the roof of one of our buildings or a patio or balcony or something and we sit there, cuddling, kissing, talking, and smoking together. That would be perfection. 

81. Who are five people you find attractive?

oh geez okay let’s do celebrities: Salma Hayek aka the one who made me realize I was gay, Natasha Lyonne, Shemar Moore, Matthew Gray Gubler, and Prince Fielder. 

In my opinion, it’s totally fine to not be in a relationship or to never be in a relationship. Your life and self worth is not defined by whether or not you have a significant other. That’s silly and perpetuates asexual and aromantic erasure. You’re a complete person on your own and you shouldn’t feel pressured to find someone to date just because we have this societal obligation to find our “one true love.”

I’ve actually never been in a relationship that’s lasted more than a week and I’m also turning 21 this year. I have nothing against being in a relationship, it just hasn’t happened for me yet and that’s okay. It hasn’t at all stopped me from loving my life and loving myself which is all that really matters. Personally, I think I would like a relationship at some point but when that happens, it’ll happen. I’m not going to let anyone tell me I need to rush into something just for the sake of being in a relationship. That’s how you end up with people you’re actually incompatible with (hence the week long relationship I mentioned before where I rushed into something and then got hurt).

blue: what do you do when you’re sad? what are some things you do when you can’t sleep? what was the best (non-romantic) night you’ve had? what kind of covers do you have on your bed? who is the last person you told a secret to?