My latest Guardian Books cartoon

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My latest Guardian Books cartoon

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I'm going to just start straight up killing people who say that reading in public is performative.
I need to rant for a second; for those of you who are reading this and donât follow me or my blog: I am a trans man living in Germany and I love reading and journaling. Iâve been journaling around my last year of elementary school (4th grade) and around that time I would pick up Barbie books from the library to read as well. I spent a lot of my life trying to live and fit in as a woman. Obviously that didnât work out, and most likely wasnât supposed to work out either, until I finally moved out and could begin with me transitioning. As I said at the beginning, I love to read and to journal. A lot of times my mum would say how feminine that is. I am still struggling a lot with body dysmorphia and identity issues, so hearing that really made me feel awful. I try to not be on social media too much but I have seen the whole âperformative maleâ thing going on. And it really makes me sad. For sure there are people who are performative, it doesnât matter what gender they are. And Iâm also sure that a lot of these things are just a âfunâ joke to get clicks, views and likes. But it really makes me feel bad about my own self and about how I go on in public. I like to read while Iâm in the metro or the train. I like to read in cafes. I like to journal in cafes. But Iâve also seen a group of people sitting across me and giggling. I have huge paranoia and in our age of digital access, Iâm scared that someone would record me and put me up online for shit and giggles. I wish things would be less about trends, likes, views, numbers. Itâs already a huge issue with the book community being incredibly toxic as in âyouâre only reading romance? How about you try out fiction for once!â or âyouâre not better than anyone else just because you read classics!â. And with that also things like âaudiobooks donât count as reading!â , âgraphic novels are just for kidsâ or âIâve read 27 books this month and you need to speed up to be just as goodâ. Life is already very stressful, hectic and tiring. Why are we making something like reading into a competition? Into a trend? Into a spectacle? Of course I like to take nicely put together, aesthetically pleasing pictures for this blog. Of course I like to take notes and put tabs in my books. Of course I take a picture of a line and send it to friends and be like âso me!â. And I know plenty other people do it too. So, why are we pushing and punishing each other for having our own way of reading? Maybe I canât take a joke. Maybe Iâm insecure because I am trans. But I canât be the only one thinking that sometimes certain things are getting out of hand.
Anyways, thank you for making it so far. I hope you will be able to purchase all the books you yearn for and reach your reading goals (if you have one)! đč
Wip part two:
Part one here: clicky
Still, that was fine.
Because, to be fair, the book was not there to be read.
No.Â
The book was there to be witnessed. Kinda like when Zach slowly teases Alexâs cock with his tongue as the older man reads from ancient Greek - or Roman, Zach doesnât really care, both empires had hot, shirtless guys and lots of sex and drinking and that's as much as attention he pays as he slowly deep throats Alex.
What can Zach say, art is subjective - or at least, he thinks heâs heard someone say that before. Frowning, he gave in and quickly grabbed his phone, typing in âis art subjective?â The first thing he saw was an article - Can art be objective, or is it always subjective and gave up. Why canât things just be simple - yes bro, nah bro, three bags full bro.Â
Staines, unfortunately, was no help either, to be honest with ya.
The little Jack Russell terrier sat under the cafĂ© table with his lead resting on top of Zachâs ankle, watching him with the judgmental expression of a dog who had seen his owner make many choices and approved of maybe two of them, one of which was feeding him. He had already sniffed the chair leg, barked once at a pigeon, tried to eat a napkin, and then settled beside Zachâs foot like a tiny security guard with anger issues.
But at least he was cute.Â
In five minutes or so, Alex would finish his subway crash readiness course and walk out of the office block across the street. With any luck, the first thing he would see would be Zach sitting outside the café, shirtless in the sun, legs spread in a way that looked casual but had actually required planning, wearing his white-and-blue striped shorts and pretending to be absorbed in literature like some kind of deeply intellectual beach bro.
Staines yawned and drooled a little on what used to be very expensive sneakers. Used to being the key word, because Staines did not respect the $400 price tag that came with Zachâs sneaker range and proceeded to chew all seven pairs.Â
It was fine, when you looked this good topless, no one was checking out your shoes.Â
A barista appeared, carrying a black coffee in a ridiculously small cup, apparently called a demitasse. Now, this isnât what Zach would normally drink for so many valid reasons - first being, pure coffee tastes like ass - no,actually, Zach thought to himself, that wasn'tâ fair giving he enjoyed rimming - pure coffee tasted like, well, shit.Â
Second, if you are going to pay $7 for something, then it should be big, bold and exciting - an ice coffee with extra caramel and whip.Â
But like the book, the coffee was nothing more than a prop. See, Zachâs look was now complete, book in one hand, pecs glistening in the sun and small, pretentious coffee in the other hand. Alex was going to melt so hard, like putty in his hands.
As he wait Zach turned a page for realism when he heard a cough, one of those fake coughs people used when they wanted his attention. Which did not surprise him. After all, look at him. He was a goddamn snack.
âDo you really think some poor chick is going to fall for your dumb routine?â asked a frankly very attractive lady with long brunette hair and massive tits. Honestly, if it wasnât for Alex, he could have been tempted to try to charm her.
But as fuckable as she was, she couldnât compete with Alex.
Alex was the whole package wrapped up in very serious, very boring Swedish wrapping. Being âdownbadâ in L.A., in summer, in 2026 was kinda cringe, for real, but Zach was alright with taking that âLâ since it came with, ya know, that âDâ.
âBaby, baby, calm ya farm. This isnât a dumb routine. Like, Iâm wounded.â Zach pressed a hand to his bare chest, deeply committed to the bit. âIâm just here, chillinâ like a villain, waiting for my man.â
Staines gave a sharp little bark from under the table.
Good timing lil buddy, Zach thought as as he pointed downward at his cute wee demon. âEven my dog supports me.â
The brunette looked under the table, and her eyes lit up as she cooed. âOh my god, is that a Jack Russell? Heâs so cuteâ
Yes, yes he was. That is why he got away with destroying everything with his surprisingly sharp teeth.Â
âYeah, Queen. His nameâs Staines, and heâs amazing. Me and him are tight as.â
Green Juice, the blonde sitting across from her with tiny sunglasses and a green drink, stared at him. âYour dog is called Staines?â
Somehow Zach felt they wouldnât appreciate the deep thinking behind the cum stain joke, so he opted for the safer explanation.Â
âAfter his patterns on his fur,â Zach said. âTotz not a cum reference.â
Nailed it.Â
Or not, apparently.Â
âThat clarification made it worse.â Green Juice replied, which was wild, if you ask him. There were no pleasing some people.Â
âHeâs gay,â the brunette said to Green Juice. âOf course. This is West L.A. All the hot guys are gay.â
âBi, actually,â Zach corrected. âMenace to both sexes.â
âGreat,â Green Juice said, laughing into her straw. âWe love an indecisive king.â
Oh, wow.
Okay.
Well, Zach wasnât going to stand for that kind of bigotry in front of his book, his dog, or his carefully curated intellectual aura.
âThat is bi erasure, and also, like, totz rude,â he said, pointing at her.
The ladies had a quick regroup, which mostly involved looking at each other in a way Zach found unnecessarily coordinated, before turning back to him with a pointed look.
âItâs not erasure if we canât get rid of you,â Green Juice said simply.
Fact check time, thank you very much.
âAh, well, you were the ones who got all up in my grill like some wannabe detectives, thank you very much.â
He was just here waiting for his man, and still people had the audacity to attack him just for reading. The struggles of being this damn attractive, he grumbled to himself. No one understood how hard it was being this good-looking.
Luckily, as a firefighter, he was strong enough, both mentally and physically, to carry the burden.
His quiet little struggle.
Unnoticed by the world.
Staines sneezed.
He was cute even when he sneezed, bless his tiny soul.Â
The brunette leaned forward and glanced curiously at the book in his lap, then back at him. âAre you actually reading that?â
Well, no, but still rude, Zach thought as he looked down at the book. Yes, it was just a prop, but there was nothing that said it was a prop. There was nothing that would give away he wasnât actually reading it. So, clearly, they were just being snobby again.
Just because he was a shirtless bro, hanging out a small cafe with a tiny coffee, a stupid book and his canine best friend did not mean he couldnât actually read.Â
âAh yeah, Queen,â he said. âItâs, like, one of my favourites, actually.â
That showed her, or so he thought.Â
Green Juice leaned sideways to read the cover. âWhatâs it about?â
âSociety.â
The trick to sounding deep was give a vague, all encompassing answer, like somehow all the worlds problems could be solved by this one book - that there was no real answer, just a whole lot of boring ass worlds. It was one of the reasons he dozed off listening to politicians speak at the LAFD fundraiser back in March.Â
The brunette smiled. âThat broad?â
âItâs a broad book.â
âItâs upside down.â
Zach froze.
For one very long second, the entire city seemed to stop around him. The traffic, the chatter, the hiss of the café machine behind him, even Staines nosing suspiciously at a dropped crumb under the table, all of it faded into a heavy, humiliating silence.
He looked down.
The book was, unfortunately, upside down.
Whatever.
He flipped it without a word and flicked another page as if that had been his intention the whole time.
The brunette laughed and gathered her bag, nudging her chair back. âWell, good luck with your man.â
âCheers babe, but for realz I donât need luck. Not when I have, like, amazing pecs and thick thighs.â
âSo so humble, babe.â
Green Juice stood too, slipping her phone into her tiny handbag before giving him one last once-over. âYou look like a stripper who got lost on the way to jury duty.â
Weird compliment, but okay, some people werenât great at dishing them out, Zach could understand that. Plus, he was honestly hot enough to be a stripper, or have an Onlyfans if he wasnât a firefighter and Tommy told him he couldnât - and he also would love to serve on jury duty.
Standing up in court and being like, âYo, king, we find that dawg in the docks guilty as fuck, straight to jail.âÂ
Wait.
Imagine a stripper court - naturally you could only have hot criminals and judges, but stillâŠÂ
He should totz pitch that to MTV or someone.Â
The brunette laughed as they started walked away, at last, if you ask Zach before she stopped. With a small chuckle, she came over, kneeling to pat Staines who fell in love with her straight away (traitor).
The brunette stopped petting Staines long enough to give Zach a look of genuine pity, which was uncalled for, before she took the book from his hands and smiled. âWell, good choice for looking smart, but do you actually know anything at all about One Flew Over the Cuckooâs Nest?âÂ
Yes, he knew it was a classic.Â
And it was probably about birds.Â
His somewhat blank expression must have been the answer she was expecting, because she took the moment to womenspain (which was totz a thing, btw)Â
âItâs basically about this loud, chaotic dude who gets sent to a psych ward and starts beefing with the scary control-freak nurse who runs the place like a tiny dictatorship.â Brunette explained, which was nice, if she was telling the truth.Â
His plan had been to google any questions Alex had asked him about the book. To be fair, his plan had been not to talk about the book because they would be busy sucking each other off on the floor of Alexâs apartment.Â
Still, it was probably helpful, right?Â
Like, to know a brief summary.Â
So, Zach nodded along slowly, making a mental note so he could look intellectual for once. âOkay, gotcha Queen. So, like prison vibes, but with worse lighting, that's rough.â
Green juice sighed way too loudly, and way to judgy for someone who gave off pretends to be spiritual while actually a bitch vibes for real. âStacey, why are you helping this himbo loser?â
Um, he was not a loser thank you very much. He had asked Tommy, actually, in a moment of rare self doubt and Tommy had confirmed, in a roundabout way that he was amazing. Okay, so Tommy hadn't quite said amazing, but Zach understood the message.
Around him, Stacey playfully waved her arm at Green juice bitch with a stupidly sexy smile, âCynthia, relax, I think Iâm making progress.â
Okay, still rude.
Stacey continued to explain the book, âKind of. He thinks he can charm and bullshit his way through everything, because heâs funny and reckless and thinks rules are for boring people.â
Green Juice looked pointedly at Zach.
The brunette looked pointedly at Zach.
Even Staines looked up, which felt targeted.
Deeply troubled by the looks, Zach frowned. âYo, hold up, why is literally everyone looking at me?â
âNo reason,â Green Juice said.
It felt like there was a reason.Â
"Just maybe there's a reason the universe led you to this book." Stacey said innocently.
He was totally going to ask Grok later if he had been insulted, but he was going to ask now. No, he had pride.
She carried on, âBut the thing is, the system is bigger and uglier than he understands. Itâs about freedom, control, power, masculinity, rebellion, and what happens when someone refuses to shut up in a place designed to break people.â
Okay, that sounds pretentious for snobby people to read. In a world so dark and depressing, why would you read about it when you could read smut or superhero stories?
Or smutty superhero stories?
âI think Iâll stick to the Batman and Superman.â Zach replied, before flexing slightly, âBut, uh, cheers - that was, like, legit right?â
With a laugh, the brunette grinned which made Zach feel less confident in trusting her, âSure, it was âlegit.â Good luck with your man, I hope it goes well.â @do-androids-dream-ao3acc @railwolf91 @fiyaerrigan @betterthanfakemouthstatic
My problem with performative reading (and why I hate it) it's only when people post photos about books and don't read, when they buy very expensive or multiple copies of the same book and don't read, that thing people even made a joke on tiktok where people just stare a fucking ton at a page so they are cleary not reading (bc you can't really need 20 minutes to read ONE page).
My fucking problem it's with people who don't read.
People
Who
Don't
Read.
If you read it and what to post your book with a good looking drink, in that very Dark Academia style, it's okay!!
Just actually read iiiiit. It's gonna be good for your head (and this world can't handle be more illiterate)!!!! đđđ

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
I hate the whole concept of performative reading because maybe Iâm just so consumed by my book that I need to take it with me everywhere? Maybe I just gotta read in public. I donât need to worry about being judged for that.
hereâs the problem with rory gilmoreâs reading habit
Roryâs goals when it comes to reading. But, should she be the poster child for reading?
PERFORMATIVE READING RESEARCH
My name is Giulia and I am a postgraduate student researching reading trends at University College London. The following survey is a key portion of my Masters of Publishing dissertation investigating performative behaviors and attitudes in readers. The survey will take approximately 10 minutes to complete and is best viewed on a laptop, desktop, or tablet rather than a smartphone. Any and all responses are extremely valuable. Please complete the survey to the best of your abilities! Thank you for participating! This is an anonymized survey strictly for participants 18+. It is part of research conducted for the Masters dissertation of Giulia E. Vidoni at University College London. All data collected is for dissertation research purposes only. All information given is protected by University College Londonâs ethical code of conduct regarding research and data collection. Information will be password protected and permanently deleted after a designated length of time. There are no personal identifiers in this survey and all data in the final dissertation will be used anonymously. You can withdraw from this survey until the point of submission.
https://opinio.ucl.ac.uk/s?s=74375