#percyjackson

Percy Jackson had fought Titans.

He had fought Giants.

He had fought primordial gods.

None of those experiences prepared him for Pride Month.

Specifically, none of them prepared him for dating a child of Dionysus during Pride Month.

"Absolutely not."

You looked up from where you were currently surrounded by glitter, rainbow streamers, six different flower crowns, and enough craft supplies to qualify as a fire hazard.

"Absolutely not what?"

Percy pointed.

At everything.

"That."

You looked around.

"What about it?"

"All of it."

"That's not very specific."

Annabeth snorted into her coffee.

Percy glared at her.

"You are supposed to be helping me."

"I am helping."

"You are laughing."

"Correct."

You smiled.

Annabeth smiled back.

Percy looked betrayed.

"You've teamed up against me."

"Obviously."

"We've been teamed up against you for years."

"That's not comforting."

You ignored him and held up two shirts.

"Which one?"

The first shirt said:

BE GAY. DO CRIME.

The second shirt said:

ASK ME ABOUT MY DAD'S WINE COLLECTION.

Annabeth immediately pointed.

"The wine one."

Percy nodded.

"The wine one."

You looked suspicious.

"You're agreeing too quickly."

"Because the first option is going to get us arrested."

"Only if I'm caught."

Percy groaned.

"See? That's exactly the problem."

You kissed his cheek.

"You're cute when you're worried."

"I'm worried all the time."

"Exactly."

Across the pavilion, several campers were constructing a float.

Unfortunately.

The float was being supervised by your siblings.

Which meant chaos.

"Why is there a giant inflatable grape?"

"Representation."

"Representation of what?"

"Dionysus."

Percy stared.

"The grape?"

"The grape."

"That's ridiculous."

The inflatable grape immediately burst into rainbow-colored confetti.

Everyone cheered.

Percy looked toward the sky.

"Why me?"

Because the universe hated him.

That was the only explanation.

The day of the parade somehow got worse.

Or better.

Depending on who you asked.

The float was beautiful.

Purple vines wrapped around the sides.

Rainbow flowers covered every surface.

Music blasted from hidden speakers.

Campers danced everywhere.

And somehow, despite nobody admitting responsibility, the giant grape had returned.

Bigger than before.

"How?"

Percy demanded.

Nobody answered.

You absolutely did not answer.

Because it had been your idea.

Percy narrowed his eyes.

"You did something."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You have glitter on your face."

"So?"

"You only get glitter on your face when you're lying."

Annabeth immediately lost her composure and started laughing.

"You have a lying glitter tell?"

"Apparently."

You gasped.

"Traitor."

"Percy's right."

"You too?"

"You literally sparkle when you're planning crimes."

"Those are unrelated events."

"They're really not."

The parade began.

People cheered.

Music played.

Rainbow flags waved overhead.

Children danced in the streets.

Couples held hands.

Families celebrated together.

And for a little while, everything felt wonderful.

Then the monster attacked.

Because of course it did.

Percy noticed first.

His expression changed instantly.

One second he was laughing.

The next he was reaching for Riptide.

"Monster."

The word spread through the campers immediately.

The crowd remained blissfully unaware.

Which was good.

Panic was the last thing they needed.

Unfortunately.

The monster chose that exact moment to emerge from beneath a rainbow balloon arch.

A dracaena.

Thirty feet tall.

Armed.

Angry.

And immediately confused.

Because the second it appeared, your powers reacted.

Vines exploded from the pavement.

Flowers erupted everywhere.

Rainbow glitter materialized out of thin air.

The monster got hit directly in the face with approximately six pounds of magical glitter.

It stopped.

Blinking.

Percy stopped.

Blinking.

The monster sneezed.

Glitter erupted from its nose.

The crowd cheered.

Apparently assuming this was part of the performance.

"Oh gods."

Annabeth looked horrified.

"What did you do?"

"I don't know."

"You absolutely know."

The dracaena sneezed again.

More glitter.

The crowd cheered louder.

Someone handed the monster a pride flag.

The monster accepted it automatically.

There was a long pause.

The dracaena looked at the flag.

Looked at the crowd.

Looked at itself.

Then awkwardly waved.

The crowd lost their minds.

Percy doubled over laughing.

"You weaponized Pride."

"I didn't mean to!"

"You accidentally turned a monster into a parade participant."

"I DIDN'T MEAN TO."

The dracaena looked increasingly confused.

Then a little happy.

Then extremely happy.

Your siblings immediately surrounded it.

"Welcome!"

"Happy Pride!"

"We have snacks!"

Percy was crying.

Actual tears.

Annabeth was no longer helping.

Grover had fallen over.

The monster accepted a flower crown.

Then another.

Then somehow ended up dancing.

By the end of the parade, nobody had fought anything.

Nobody had been injured.

The dracaena had acquired seven pride flags.

Three flower crowns.

Two friendship bracelets.

And an emotional support grape plushie.

Percy watched it leave.

Then looked at you.

Then at the monster.

Then back at you.

"I'm never questioning Dionysus kids again."

"Good choice."

The dracaena waved one final time.

A shower of rainbow glitter exploded overhead.