YAAAAASwho the fuck put the peeps in the microwave Patrick, bless his heart. Or Rebecca, if she’s drunk and Patrick is laughing and telling her to do it.

who forgot to put the cat outside before sex Patrick because “it’s his cat!”

who posts vines of the other doing embarrassing shit Neither of them really do this, but Rebecca would post the vine over Patrick because if Pat posted it, Rebecca would threaten to divorce him until he took it down

who breaks the most phones They both do and both in the dumbest ways, and are terrified to tell the other about how they broke their phone…again. Only for the other one to say ‘Yeah, me too’ and hold up a cracked iPhone

who dies first Can we not. If Patrick dies first, Rebecca would wear black every single day of the rest of her life and probably move in with Camilla or their daughter. If Rebecca dies first, Patrick would move in with one of the kids, probably Dash. If either of them die, the other would be so lost and miserable all the time.

which one I could see as being lactose intolerant Rebecca. She’s not, but I think she has a weaker stomach when it comes to food

who thinks they can do something really well even though they can’t Rebecca, on the rare occasions that she plays video games with Patrick. She’d suck and he’d just let her win, feeding her ego. Then she’d bring it up later if someone was talking about it in conversation and be all “Halo? I’m so good at that game, I beat Patrick. Patrick, tell them.”

who is more likely to get kicked out of the bed Patrick, though it surprisingly doesn’t happen very often. There’s a lot of threats of “you’re sleeping in the fucking guest room tonight” but by the time nighttime rolls around, they’re either making up or have made up.

<333333333333

leaves their dirty clothes on the floor

Neither for longer than a night. They both like their clothes too much to see them on the floor like that.

forgets to run the dish washer

Patrick. And Rebecca will groan loud enough for him to hear so he knows he’s fucked up. But then when she does it, it’s totally fine obviously.

pumps gas for the car

Patrick, not that Rebecca wouldn’t but he’s usually the one driving anyway so it’s on his side.

drives when they’re going somewhere

Patrick, Rebecca keeps busy in the car and prefers to be driven around even if it’s technically her car. Unless Patrick says something about how he should drive because he’s the guy, then she will be like “fuck you, sit in the back” and she’ll drive.

rearranges the furniture

Both but it’s mostly just Rebecca directing Patrick to move things, asking his opinion then changing it back

falls asleep with the TV on

Rebecca. Usually just whenever they’re watching a movie or a series and they’re cuddling. But she’ll say she saw the part he’s talking about if he starts teasing.

gets to use the bathroom first

Depends on what for. If it’s to actually use the bathroom, probably Rebecca. If it’s to get ready, they’re both in there fighting for space and yelling to stay on their side of the sink, and oh my god, you have so much shit do you even use all of that

decides the temperature for the ac/heater

Both. Like they definitely break their ac/heater several times throughout the year because they’re both switching the temperatures to what they want without saying anything to the other. Until it’s broken and they’re both blaming the other.

sets up holiday decorations

Both of them and omg this would be so cute because they’d put music on and just look forward to the day they get to put things up. Rebecca would actually sing along with Patrick and it would just be a magical time in their house

leaves the lights on

Rebecca because she’s afraid of someone sneaking up on her. Mostly her husband. Actually, if it’s ever dark in a place Rebecca has just been, it’s because she’s hiding around the corner to scare him.

uses the bathroom with the door open

Patrick. Rebecca would never

fixes the plumbing (or calls the plumber)

AY AY AY AYYY

who stays up late at night to read and who sleeps with their head on their lap

They would both do that. Rebecca would probably be working and use Pat’s head as a desk. Patrick would be on his phone, reading something on there and Rebecca would get mad if he used her head as a desk.

who has the more complicated Starbucks order

Rebecca. She types it up on her phone to show them because so many people have fucked it up. It’s a Grande, half sweet, non-fat macchiato with a caramel drizzle, usually, unless there’s pumpkin spice lattes.

who wants kids and how many

Both but later. They’ll both say way later than they actually want. Rebecca just wants one, maybe two because she always says she’d be better off without the rest of the Clarke kids (even if she’s only half serious). But Patrick would want more because he was an only child growing up and could have used a brother or sister.

who looks best in a tux/ gown

They both think they look amazing in their tux or gown, but they’d both say the other looks best.

who despises the other’s favorite food

I actually think they would have similar tastes for food. Rebecca might go on and on about lobsters and soufflés but she’d be just as happy with a stadium hot dog. However, I think she’d be the only one to actually stomach caviar.

who is the dog person and who is the cat person

Patrick is both but Rebecca is definitely a dog person who is getting a soft spot for cats too.

who feeds the ducks at the park

Patrick. Rebecca’s terrified they’ll poop on her or attack her which only makes Patrick give them more bread so they follow her around.

who cries over the aspca commercials

Both, but Rebecca tries to hide it.

who has the motherly instincts

Right now, Rebecca probably more over Patrick. Just because she has a niece and nephews that she actually loves spending time with and carrying around.

who laughs too much

Patrick but that’s okay, she thinks it’s cute.

who is the worst cook

Rebecca, but not by much and she wouldn’t admit it. They each have a couple of dishes they’ve gotten good at but it’s hard to find some new things to cook that actually turn out.

who watches too much TV

lmsrp’s disney character contest

Patrick Harrington Jr. as Max Goof (A Goofy Movie, 1995) 

You most certainly can!! 

Max 

Despite having been in a longterm relationship with another man he has internalized homophobia. He never considered himself gay because he didn’t want that title on his sexuality, he doesn’t consider himself bisexual either, because to him sexuality is black and white, gay or straight. He does hate himself for saying homophobic things and for years he didn’t let himself feel that hate, he used narcotics and alcohol as a way to get rid of the feelings, but now that he is sober, he’s forced to recognize his actions and forced to face all that hatred. 

While staying with Sheryl, he came to appreciate his mother in a completely different light. She took care of him and also let him do his own thing, while worrying about him. It was during this time that Max realized that he has quite a lot in common with his mother and they bonded over the death of the two men they loved while those men were on the job. Though it took him some time to actually open up about his relationship with Thomas (and even then he wasn’t willing to disclose a lot), the two of them still bonded.

He doesn’t know how to reconnect with his family, it feels awkward now and he hates that.

Max has ten tattoos, most of them on his torso and when he is one year sober he will get another one. 

He doesn’t want children and he doesn’t want to get married. 

He is hopelessly in love with Caroline and tries to make up every pain that he has caused her but is at a loss and tends to come off just a little pushy and insecure. 

He and Jon used to share a room when they were younger and Max was always the one who was making up excuses for Jon when he snuck out of the window.

He loves Van Morrison and U2 and he hopes to one day go to Ireland so he can visit where they started. 

Only in his home will you see him wearing jeans and a tshirt, otherwise he is always in a button-up shirt and some sort of casual dress pant.

He really wants to be a man that his family can be proud of, the man that he was when he was in his twenties and working for the NYPD but he doesn’t know if he’ll ever be able to have that again as a support counsellor. 

He really misses the force but he doesn’t like the dangers of it and what the stress drove him to (he puts a lot of blame on his former job).

Patrick 

Is a huge Bruce Springsteen fan and would gladly follow the man around on his tours if he had the money and time. He hopes to be playing stages in front of crowds like the Boss when he’s 65+. 

Patrick is incredibly vain and tries to look his best no matter what. Even when he’s lounging around the house he’s probably done his hair, just in case. 

He honestly doesn’t miss the days when he slept around, even though he says that a lot to a few of his friends, he loves that he’s with Rebecca and he’s very happy being a one woman man. Cheating really taught him what was important. (Don’t get him wrong, sex is really high on his list but it’s not important as being with Rebecca) 

Has a very large collection of video games even though he’s really quite rubbish at most of them, 

When Rebecca thought she was pregnant and while she was still in Europe he went out and bought a few things for the baby: a build-a-bear that he named “Bruce” and dressed in a leather jacket and guitar, a cheap ukulele, and a little “I heart NYC” onesie. 

He honestly doesn’t care about what the rest of the house looks like (as long as it has a few Bruce framed posters) as long as he has his office/studio. Bex can do whatever the hell she wants with the living room.

He does actually notice Rebecca wearing things to match him when she comes to gigs, he just doesn’t always say anything, it does make him feel great and it gives him a huge ego boost. 

He doesn’t regret their elopement one bit, even though she hasn’t said “I love you” yet. He knows that she does and that it will be a great day when she does actually say it. 

Though he hasn’t gone to visit his father in prison yet, when he does visit it will become a monthly thing because Patrick still wants to impress his father.

Who’s the cuddler: I think it depends on the situation because I don't really see either of them being huge on cuddling.

Who’s the big spoon/little spoon: They'd alternate

What’s their favorite non-sexual activity: Probably would have been just walks in New York through Central Park or shopping together back in the day. Or attending events and performances and making little comments under their breath about other people. 

Who uses all the hot water: I honestly feel like it would be Pat in the shower or Rebecca if she wanted to take a bath

Most trivial thing they fight over: Everything What hour of the night Pat is up playing guitar and how Rebecca always gets on edge about everything during Fashion Week. Or exes. But there's really no such thing as a trivial fight with them, they'll make it a bigger deal than it needs to be.

Who does most of the cleaning: They both do but I feel like they would both be complaining while they do it

What has a season pass on their dvr/Who controls the netflix queue: They both do but their movie selections is where they actually compromise with each other

Who calls up the super/landlord when the heat’s not working:  Rebecca because she knows how to bitch and would get so fed up and just be like 'GIVE ME THE FUCKING PHONE I'M GOING TO CALL THIS BITCH UP'

Who leaves their stuff around: They both do, just I don't think a whole lot of stuff

Who remembers to buy the milk: Aww they probs used to grocery shop together and that just gave me feels. I think Patrick would drink more milk than Rebecca does because she isn't huge on cereal and I can see him having it a lot so yes. 

Who remembers anniversaries:  Lol Rebecca but Pat has good intentions

Who cooks normally: They either meal prep together or just order out/go out a lot

How often do they fight: A lot. Like. All the time. 

What do they do when they’re away from each other: Facetime or text or call all the damn time that it's just better to be together so that they're not so attached to their phones

Nicknames for each other: Bex or babe or any other kind of endearment, Rebecca wouldn't let him call her anything stupid obv. She calls him hon and honey though

Who is more likely to pay for dinner: Patrick before, but now probably Rebecca. Actually right now now, she'd be like lol I'll pay for my own gl bitch

Who steals the covers at night: They sleep so close together that this isn't even an issue

What would they get each other for gifts: Rebecca would have gotten him clothes and nice watches and those kinds of things. If it were now, she would get him the same stuff but probably get him guitar things and all that jazz too. Patrick is golden with jewellery and dresses or more songs written about her

Who kissed who first: I don't think we ever decided but I can see it being Patrick kissing Rebecca first

Who made the first move: Patrick

Who remembers things: They both do

Who started the relationship: Patrick

Who cusses more: I think they're both pretty equal tbh

What would they do if the other one was hurt: Figure out who/what hurt them and then destroy it. TAKE THAT BITCH DOWN. 

Who is the dirty talker: Pat