#party-bees

HonEY NO

You would think that since I’m fully capable of making frosting from scratch, (and I ate some genuinely expired, like 2 years after the BB, frosting from a can on a dare once), that I would know better by now.

JEEEEEAAAALOOOOUSSS my hair is too long rn but I have a horrid cold that I don't want to share with my hairdresser

@asexualconnor replied to your photo “Oh thank god a haircut.”

that is a VERY cute (and gay) haircut

@party-bees replied to your photo “Oh thank god a haircut.”

OH THANK GOD A CUTE FACE

Hello there, dear! I hope you are enjoying the Red experience, ha.

Naturally, there are some logical steps to getting involved in a new environment, but before I get to them - first and foremost, approach the situation with enthusiasm rather than anxiety. There is a lot of work, but it all starts with abandoning the fear that you may somehow fail. You live there now, and you will have to engage with the place and people in it whether you like it and whether you are uneasy about it or not.

Now, to particular points. You will likely be most successful if you start with gaining some acquaintances. Be friendly with neighbours and store cashiers. Research local events, both organisational and recreational - even if you do not end up attending, they can be conversation points. Show interest in how things work where you are now. Do not be afraid to confess to confusion, and let people help, even if you already know the information. Friends are trickier: friendships are built upon connections, they are not quite a neighbour you have to get along with because you live next door. You can look at places where individuals with interests similar to yours may gather, for example. Be open to experiences, in any case. A job is more of a matter of search and luck - you do not exactly ask an office building out for a dinner before an interview. You can use it to your advantage, though - for example, you could ask people whether any local businesses are hiring.

The struggle to find good lesbian monsters is real.

I’m going to have to see if I can conjure up at least one or two as a Christmas gift.

This is ridiculous and I love it. TWO exes with family connections???

lol i know right? i suspect that is exactly what car thief exbf is up to honestly but his uncle? totally chopped cars, but we curiously always got the biggest discount at the locally-owned-chain-restaurant (often only charged for a drink or something), even though generally we were impressively not kicked out for being drunk/high/loud assholes with friends.

Oh my god she gon fuck a cat

The last time I picked up a were-anything/”shifter”/anything similar paranormal romance, I made it like 300 pages into a mediocre story when the lady gave her tiger boyfriend a hj while he was completely 100% a tiger.

I threw the book across the room.

It was at that moment that I swore I would never read another one again, no matter how easy it was to find, no matter who recommended it. I was done, not happening, they were unwelcome in my home.

This, maybe 2-3 years later, is the first book that I picked up that’s even tangentially in the genre (and largely by accident) and went, “Surely you’re overreacting, they’re not ALL weird zo/ophile wank fests. People have standards and editors and surely nobody else got away with this in a professionally published book.” 

THIS IS LIKE TEN PAGES INTO THE BOOK

So sex with guns. Got it.

There’s also a poorly-tethered horse like 10 feet away, and they refuse to acknowledge the horse is there while any of this is happening.

So it’s like when the dog is watching you, but bigger and more likely to take a huge dump any minute now.

WEST VIRGINIA IS NOT DEEP SOUTH WTF. GEORGIA. GEORGIA IS DEEP SOUTH. NORTH FLORIDA. ALABAMA. MISSISSIPPI. IF THERE IS NO MORE SOUTH TO GO WITHOUT BEING IN MEXICO OR THE O C E A N CONGRATS IT’S THE DEEP SOUTH.

Like, do these people not own a map?

Do they just have no other way to describe a fallout game taking place in an area lacking a major city calling it “deep south”?

Or do they not have extremely specific memories of a specific place and time attached to the first five notes of that john denver song?