#parenting decisions

Parents: Feeling tired, irritated, in need of a break? These three blog posts are the pick-me-up you need.

When do I find time to read?

Hardly ever, what with writing, editing, parenting, and that one bathroom break I get each day.

But at 2 a.m. when I’m finally able to crawl into bed, there are a few websites I visit before I close my eyes for five hours of fitful sleep.

The pieces I’ve recently found have helped me feel … normal. They’re by parents like me. Their kids are driving them nuts. They’re…

For months, I'm was nervous about leaving my daughter with my husband. My baby care guide helped ease my fears.

Mr. T and I have known each other since we were kids. Seriously — it’s been more than 20 years.

So if I’m honest and not being hard on him, I’ll admit that he’s one of the best men I know. He’s kind, caring, as considerate as can be. He’s patient, relaxed, and always even-keeled. I trust that he’ll always love and protect me and Baby Bird.

But for months, I wouldn’t trust him to care for our…

Yes, babies can feel it.  They can feel that just like they can feel circumcision, just like they can feel any other cut or trauma to their skin.

Does it matter if they can feel it?  That’s the next question to ask though.  Adults can feel it too, and at least babies won’t remember the experience.  We don’t fully understand how babies perceive this kind of pain, however, we do know that the pain can cause stress to the baby, which increases stress hormones and can affect the baby’s brain make-up.

Can babies consent to having their bodies modified, and does it matter?  That’s the 3rd, and in my opinion, most important question to ask.   Many of the arguments about circumcision discuss that baby’s inability to consent to a permanent surgery.  The same goes for piercing ears.  

In my opinion, it is not ethical to modify another person’s body without their consent.  If you were the person in charge of making medical decisions for a sibling while they were in a coma, would it be ethical to have their ears pierced or their penis circumcised while they were unable to advocate for themselves?  No. 

Parenting approaches is helpful, and can assist in overcoming how to Make Good Parenting Decisions #parenting #parentingTips #parentingAdvice #isParenting

Have your kids ever told you about their problems? Some kids have a difficult time at school. Moreover, they think that their teacher don’t treat them fairly. Yet, they are afraid of confronting their teacher.

Do you know how to make good parenting decisions in such kind of situations? What are you going to say to your kids? What advice do you give? It can be a difficult task.

You need to make a…

My husband mentions sometimes that we won't be able to sleep naked when the baby starts to get older (3/4/5 years old) because kids have a habit of climbing into bed with their parents. But I'm totally still gonna sleep naked. Firstly, children are not uncomfortable with stuff like that. A body is just a body to them. They don't even really know the difference between boys and girls yet. Secondly, I'm teaching my daughter not to be scared or ashamed of the human body. Neither my husband or I are gonna do anything wrong by our kid, so she's not gonna be in danger. We're clearly not going to have sex if she's in our bed, so it won't be weird. She'll just know that this is the way her parents sleep, and it's the most comfortable for them. Maybe she'll realize younger than I did that sleeping naked is more comfortable for her and she won't have as much trouble sleeping as I did growing up. And, if she does turn out to be more comfortable that way, she won't be ashamed of doing it because it's just a body, and she'll know that it's normal. And she should know that people are allowed to do whatever they want with their own body as long as it's not hurting anyone else. To me it's just always seemed silly that parents are like, "Well I don't want to scar her for life!" She's not gonna be scarred. She'll just grow up knowing nakedness and the human body is nothing to be ashamed of.

It really hurts my heart to hear that you felt like your abortion was forced on you.  I hope that you can find the peace and healing that you need.  I don’t know if you’ve seen any of my other posts on this topic, but please think about calling any of these after-abortion support lines:

Backline

Exhale

After Abortion

Abortion Experiences

You say you’d like info on your choices, but I think the first thing to think about is figuring out what your life will look like if you have a baby now.  Some practical logistics to work out:

If you get pregnant in the next few months, when would you end up giving birth?  What will you do about school at that point?

Who will help you pay for healthcare for you and your baby?  Who will help you pay for baby supplies?

If you go to school or work, who will take care of your baby while you do that?  If you don’t work, who will support you and your baby?

Where will you live?  Is there enough space for a family there?

What is your career goal?  How will you achieve that goal with a baby?  How would you achieve that goal differently if you did not have a baby?

Do you have a partner?  Will that partner stay with you if you decide to have a baby?   Would you want to have a baby with that partner if they decide not to stay with you?

How do you want to raise your children?  Do you want them to live in a specific type of household with specific rules, education, resources, etc?  Could you provide that for them now?

What are the major ways that you would need to change your behavior if you decide to become a parent?

None of these is a reason to not have a baby, I just want you to be thinking ahead so that you can be the best parent you can be.  The answer to those questions might be “I don’t know right now.”  You might also find good answers by looking into the resources in your local area.  What types of teen pregnancy and parenting organizations are there?  Ask your guidance counselor at school, ask your healthcare provider.  Did your brother and his girlfriend have any help?  Where are they living, and would they be willing to share hand-me-downs with you?  Really explore all your options before you make the decision.