“It’s dinosaurs on a train. We’d call it, hahaha I dunno, Dinosaur Train? We could, I dunno, we could talk about like feelings and diversity and stuff I guess, or whatever you want, it’s whatever.”
“Did you say dinosaurs… on a train?”
“Yeah we know, it’s all we have so far but—“
“Like a train, but it has dinosaurs on it…?”
“Yeah sorry sorry we are pretty high to be honest and we just thought—“
“Name your f***ing price. It’s a green light.”
-how I imagine the PBS pitch for Dinosaur Train went
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I am convinced that 90% of parenthood is just making sure this real life tamagotchi is kept alive. Didn’t get around to tummy time? Eh no biggie, try again tomorrow. Did they not get nap time? Meh, they’ll crash at some point.
Just remember, 90% = “A” grading on most grading scales.
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"Alright Zach, what's three times two?" Ben asks his three-year-old son, kneeling down beside his bed and smiling as the child counts on his pudgy toddler fingers.
"Six," Zach replies and looks at Ben expectantly. Ben's smile stretches even wider.
"That's right!" He applauds, holding a hand up for a high-five. "What's six times three?"
That was a harder one, but they'd gradually been moving into bigger numbers the last few weeks. Zach furrows his brow. He counts on his fingers, folds his arms across his chest, and then analyzes his covers in deep thought. Ben hears a noise from the hallway and briefly looks over to see Mal leaning against the doorway, furrowing her brow the same Zach is as she listens. She must have already finished putting their other son, Tyler, to bed. That means he's running behind.
"Eighteen," Zach replies, brightening up as he remembers the answer.
Ben laughs. "That's right!" He exclaims and then pushes up off the floor to sit beside the small child on the bed. Zach scoots over against the wall and pats his blue striped sheets, indicating Ben can move forward. Ben chuckles and reaches across the bed to pick up the book his son had picked out. "Alright, champ, are we reading about Rapunzel and Eugene tonight, or are we - what's this?" Ben raises an eyebrow as Zach reaches out for the thick book in excitement.
"It's my word book," Zach explains, snuggling into his pillow and opening it up. "Aunt Jane said all the kids in the high schools get one, and she gave me this one to keep. See? My name is on it." He holds the book close to his nose, flips through the pages, and takes a deep inhale. "It smells like a good book," he mumbles as he curls into Ben's side. "She said it'd help me learn new words."
"It's called a dictionary," Ben raises an eyebrow, fighting a little smile as he looks up to see Mal still looking at them confusedly in the doorway. "Dad used to read through this when he was younger too. Not as young as you, though. You can look through it to find words you don't know or go through and see which ones you do know."
Zach nods, opens to the first page, and skims down the entries. He skips over the letter 'A's and goes straight for the first long word he sees. "Aardvark," he announces, nuzzling his sandy blonde hair into Ben's side as Ben leans back against the headboard and starts combing his fingers through Zach's hair. "An animal with a long snout and a long sticky tongue that feeds mostly on termites and is active at night." He looks up at Ben with his finger on that last description. "That means they're nocturnal like cats, right?"
Ben chuckles. He can't believe how much his son knows. He's well aware it isn't normal for a kid to be this knowledgeable, but he isn't going to we complain too much. It's nice to have someone to talk to like this. "That's right," He agrees. "Like cats and snakes and lizards and things."
"It must live in a hot climate," Zach reasons. "And it moves at night when it's not so hot."
Ben hears Mal shift in the doorway and he glances up to see she's dropped her hands in something like surprise. He smiles up at her, and though he can't see her expression, he figures it must be something like pride. She hasn't been able to come in to help him put Zach to sleep the last few months as Tyler tends to turn his furniture into animals when he's anxious for bedtime and she usually has to round up and return a herd or two to its original form. Zach, however, doesn't have magic and prefers reading aloud to his parents as part of his bedtime routine, so that's pretty easy for Ben to cover as Mal tried to calm Tyler down. However, he was exhausted tonight, so Mal gets to listen in on what he and Tyler usually work on in the evenings.
"Abacus," Zach reads. "An instrument for doing arithmetic by sliding counters along rods or in grooves."
Ben puts his finger down on the word 'arithmetic'. "What's that mean, champ?" He asks.
"Math," Zach shrugs. "It's like what we've been working on. Multiplications. Like two times two and six times six."
"Which is?" Ben prompts, and Zach puts the book down to tap his index fingers together.
"Four and thirty-six," Zach announces. "Which together are forty."
"Good job," Ben smiles over at Mal. She is standing very still in the doorway, and he can't tell if she's breathing or not. Zach keeps reading, mumbling by his side, and Mal slowly creeps into the room to hover by the foot of the bed. Zach finishes reading about 'abolitionist' and then reaches for a pencil on his headboard to circle the word, indicating he's interested in learning more about it. Ben isn't surprised - it's the same kind of concept he lives for. He leans forward to take Mal's hand and it's then that he realizes her face is drawn and taut and she's staring down at the book in Zach's lap like it's an evil thing she doesn't want around her son. Ben frowns. "What's wrong?" He asked.
Zach looks up immediately and sets the pencil and book aside. "Mommy..." He whines, leaning on his knees with his arms outstretched. "Are you feeling sad?"
"No, baby," Mal smiles a little tight, scared smile. He knows the look, but he hasn't seen it for a while. Not since Zach was born. There's the occasional exception - when their toddlers go near stairs or when they first started standing or when Ben tosses them into the air, but for the most part, he doesn't see the 'I don't like this at all' face. She takes Zach into her arms and hugs him tightly, and Ben tilts his head at her while Zach's head is turned away. She ignores him, which raises Ben's concern even more.
Ben puts a hand on Zach's back. "Bud, it's time for bed," he announces. "I'll read more of your new dictionary with you tomorrow, but Mom and Dad had a long day today. You can stay up a little longer and read, or you can go to bed now."
"I'll go to bed," Zach yawns. He climbs back into his covers and then pushes the dictionary away. "You can answer my questions later." Ben snorts, pulls the covers up around the little three-year-old, and then kisses his hair as Zach closes his eyes. He and Mal walk to the door, glancing back every so often as parents are wont to do. Ben lets her into the hall before him, shuts the door softly, and then turns with an open mouth to reask Mal what happened. He doesn't get a syllable out before she's practically exploded into rushed whispers.
"You're doing multiplication with him?" She demands, clutching her hair. "And he's reading a dictionary? He's four! He's not even four - he'll be four in three months! How long has this been going on?"
Ben blinks. "Is it a problem?" He asks. "You already knew he liked reading."
"Well, I mean, I'm glad that he's smart and everything, but..." Mal chews on her lip with wide eyes darting back and forth without landing on him. "Don't you think he's too young?"
"He's gifted," Ben shrugs. "I have no idea where he gets it from, but he catches on so quickly. We've been doing multiplication together now for almost two weeks. I'm trying to get him to learn his fours and sixes."
"I thought you were doing additions?" Mal questions, biting her lip and turning from one side to the other as if she can't decide which direction she wants to go. "I thought you were going to be starting subtractions once he got the hang of it."
"We did," Ben shrugged. "He caught on really fast. He can do two-digit addition and subtractions in his head and everything else on paper. So I moved to multiplication." He catches her hand as she spins around in a frantic circle. "Hey - what's the issue here? He's smart, so what?"
Mal rips her hand free only to wave it in front of her like she burned it and she's trying to shake off the pain. "I don't know that stuff, Ben!" She snaps in a whisper. "What's a noc- a n- an animal at night! and multiplication is like... second grade here, right?"
"Third," Ben corrects quietly.
"That's not better!" Mal snaps. "Why is he growing up so fast? Why is he learning so much? I mean, I'm happy - I am! He's such a brilliant, perfect boy, but he's going to grow up thinking I'm a dunce because I can't answer any of those questions!"
"You can't answer what six times six is?" Ben drawls slowly, though he understands her panic now. Auradon schooling system is intimidating enough to Mal, whose Dragon Hall classes barely taught them to read and write. If not for Yen Sid, the vast majority of Island Children would have had to retake elementary courses in High school, and some of them still can't read or write.
"Of course I can!" Mal snaps. "But... but... he's going this fast and he's just going to keep going! I just had my baby Ben - I don't want him to be big yet!"
"You're not going to lose him," Ben tells her, taking her hands and squeezing them tightly. "Mal, he adores you. Did you see how sad he got when he thought you were sad in there? You're his whole world. He and Tyler both think you're the literal sun." He drags her into his arms and lets her claw around at his collarbone for a hold before wrapping her hands around his back and letting out a little breath.
She's a good mom. She lifts Zach up to pick books off of higher shelves and retrieves toys that Tyler likes to hurl across the room and she lets all three of them - Ben included - curl into her when they watch movies together and she's the stabilizing rock that holds his little family together. But he gets how this scares her. After all, Zach won't be little forever, and his questions are only going to get more complex and hard to answer.
Tyler gets a little older to where he's now three and Zach is four and Tyler is no longer attempting to create a zoo in his bedroom before bedtime. Ben and Mal start rotating again, and Mal learns very quickly that Zach's bedtime routine is now very far out of her depth. A stack of various encyclopedias - some children's and some not - sit beside his bed with his dog-eared and marked-up dictionary in a prized position on his headboard. She manages to help her baby get through brushing teeth and pajamas without fumbling too much, but then Zach is curling up into his pillow and pulling the blue comforter he got at Christmastime around his shoulders as Mal skins the spines of the encyclopedias for something she recognizes. "The Plant World", one reads. "How Government Works - for children", says another. "You can speak French!" a third announces.
"Can we read my dictionary?" Zach asks after patiently waiting about thirty seconds as Mal examines each of the unfamiliar titles beside his bed. Mal nods with a swallow and Zach retrieves his blue and white dictionary and opens it up in the middle. She takes a deep breath to calm herself and then panics again when the first word Zach reads is unfamiliar.
"Minuend," He mumbles as he lays his head down on her shirt and leans the book open on her legs. "A number from which another number is to be subtracted."
Mal's skin crawls. Now that she's thinking about it, the word sounds vaguely familiar in the back of her head. Maybe it was included in a lesson years ago or something. But the fact she didn't know it is the problem. If he asks any questions, what will she say?
Luckily, most of the words are pretty straightforward and there isn't a lot that she misses. There are mislead and mission and mistake, all of which are pretty okay, and then the occasional word like mirth or a mite.
"Mite - o - chon - drian," Zach sounds out and then pauses to yawn. "One of the parts found in the cytoplasm of a cell outside the nucleus that provides the cell with energy released from the breakdown of nutrients."
"Baby, do you know what that means?" Mal blurts out. Her head is spinning. It's somehow easier to remember what the various terms mean from her high school classes when Zach is sounding out the big words so carefully, but she still only has a vague recollection of what it means.
Zach nods. "We're made up of cells," he explains, running a hand up his arm. "And cells have DNA that tells them how we need to be built. And this is part of a cell that makes energy." He curls up closer to her arm. "Dad told me about it a while ago."
Of course Dad told him. Dad is smart and was taught these things as a child. Mom was not.
"Mitosis," Zach begins, yawns widely, and then looks at the page through half-lidded eyes to finish. "Process of cell division by which two new nuclei are formed, each containing the original number of chromosomes." He finally sets the book down, rubs his eyes, and then rolls over onto his pillow. Mal reaches over to tuck him in. "Mom?" He calls, eyes closed as he mumbles against his pillow. "How does a cell get the same number of DNA when it becomes two new ones?"
Mal's mind blanks out and she stammers a little as she slides off his bed onto her knees. "I, uh, I think they double, baby. They double up and then divide."
Zach squeezes his pillow, opens his eyes, and looks up. "But... they're already doubled?" He ponders aloud. "They're in a twisty spiral."
That Mal remembers. Her teacher had a giant stretchable model that Evie and Doug once rented out and examined in their dorm room. "Maybe they double the twisted DNA?" She suggests, relaxing a little as she runs a hand up and down Zach's back.
Zach shrugs and buries his face into his pillow. "I'll ask dad tomorrow," He yawns. "Goodnight mom."
Mal sits down hard on her tailbone with every bone in her body vibrating. Her son's words go through her like a bullet. 'I'll ask Dad'. She slowly forces herself to get up and walk to the door. She pulls it shut before she collapses beside the frame and presses her fingertips to her head.
Why is he asking questions like this already? Why doesn't she know the answers? Has he already caught on to the fact she's not nearly as smart as he and Ben are? How much longer does she have before he realizes she's a complete idiot who has no chance of ever learning half of the things he practically downloads into his brain?
Ben finds her there, on the floor outside her son's room mumbling 'questions' and 'cells' underneath her breath. And at three a.m the following morning, when he's awakened by the light of her phone as she reads a seventh-grade lesson on cells and biology, he doesn't say a word.
"You know, just because you don't know about lightning and thunder doesn't mean you're not smart," Ben sighs from the doorway as Mal clicks through the twenty tabs she has open on her computer. "You just know other things. Who cares if Zach knows what the plant is called - you know whether or not it's edible."
"Great," Mal snaps irritably. "You and he can talk about electricity and... reactions in the atmosphere and I'll tell him where best to stab a man so he dies." She snaps the lid of her laptop shut with her eyes closed and lets out a ragged, ashamed breath. "I can't tell him things like that," she moans. "He already knows you're smarter than I am and I'm scarier than you. If I tell him things like that, he'll think I'm a monster."
"He's not going to think you're a monster," Ben sighs, pinching his fingertips to the bridge of his nose. He already knows he doesn't have much chance of convincing her, though. They've been having this discussion for almost two years now.
"Why is he growing up?" Mal groans, burying her face in her hands. "I can't deal with him getting bigger and all these things... Tyler still can't read by himself and he's almost four now!"
"Zach's a special case," Ben sighs. He's not sure how to console her - is there any consolation for a mom who feels like her baby is growing up too fast? And all she says is true - Zach amazes everyone who meets him. He's somewhere in between a third and a fifth-grade level as far as his knowledge goes, but his rationing is beyond even some adults Ben knows in the courts. Most of what he knows is from reading or Ben and Mal talking with him. They called in a tutor a while ago, and Zach was nice enough to her, but he simply learned too fast for her to be able to develop lessons for him. The local school kind of shook their heads and said that it would be a waste of his potential to have him sit in with even the sixth graders, who need things to be taught more than once whereas he remembers everything, and the only premiere school for kids his age is five hours away, so the only schooling he's done has been online and at-home activities. Now that Tyler is almost to kindergarten age and he's being grouped in with the rest of his age group, he and Mal are starting to understand exactly where a child of Zach's age should be. And it's not sitting upside down in the armchair in the library reading Einstein's theory of special relativity for fun. (He couldn't understand it, but he keeps track of words and phrases and that's how he figures things out)
"Is this good for him?" Mal sighs, tugging on her hair a little. "He's not around any other kids except for his brother and his cousins. and he's moving so fast... what happens when he levels out?"
Ben shrugs. It's going to be a long time before Zach levels out. And he's not too concerned with Zach's friends. Sure, the crown prince doesn't get out much, but he's kind and amicable and gets along well with everyone. He's not a very temperamental child, even when pestered by Zach or Jay's kids.
"We need something he can focus on learning that he won't master the moment it's out of someone's mouth," Mal sighs. "Preferably something with other children." She glances over at Ben with a soft, pleading sigh. "For my sanity and his sake."
"I don't think there's a problem," Ben sighs, sitting down beside her. "But it might be good for him to know what it's like to not learn something right off the bat."
"I was thinking of putting Tyler in dance," Mal sighs. "The other moms at the school have some of his friends in a class together. It's like a tumbling, gymnastics program. After school... let out some of his energy."
"Well, it's not like he can go battle pirates for fun like you used to," Ben snorts, nudging her side even as Mal frowns. "That sounds good. Are you going to put Zach in one?"
"Well, then I'd have to drive out there and back and then there again to drop him off and pick him up. Tyler can walk with his friends. One of the moms works in the building," Mal sighs, brushing her hair out of her eyes. "It would be better to have something I can take him to when I drop Tyler off at school."
Ben puts his hands on her shoulders and rubs his fingertips into her shoulders. "Maybe... music?" He suggests, and then a new plane of understanding opens to his eyes. "Actually... that's a great idea. Learning an instrument helps make connections in kid's brains. He'll have to practice to get good at it and train the muscles in his fingers to-"
"Oh my gosh, you're just like him!" Mal groans. "Why did I marry someone smart? This was a horrible idea!"
Ben laughs. He can't help it. He kisses her cheek and mumbles an apology against her skin. "I'll talk to him and ask what sounds cool," He tells her. "And then I'll get back to you, okay?"
Thus, Zach begins taking guitar at age five. They pick a studio two buildings away from the public library, so for an hour and fifteen minutes Zach does guitar, then he goes to the library for weekly crafts lessons that other homeschooled kids participate in, and then waits the last hour or so before Mal or Ben picks Tyler up from school. He doesn't mind the wait since he gets to read, but he does mind the lessons themselves. Guitar, it turns out, is hard for him. He gets annoyed, but never angry. Sometimes he asks Mal if he can not go, but he doesn't argue when she disagrees. Once he kicks the empty guitar case, but their oldest child isn't very explosive or hot-headed. Ben's proud of him. After all, it isn't easy to struggle with something, and after learning everything else so easily, it's hard to have to practice something as simple as plucking strings in the right order.
For the first time, he progresses at the same rate as the other kids taking it with him, and Ben sees all of Mal's nerves relax one by one. It's still hard for her to see him move so fast in other subjects, but so long as she can listen to him complain about disliking guitar and how much the strings hurt his fingers, she's convinced that he'll still come to her for advice and comfort and she can keep trying to be a good mom.
For several months, Ben listens to his eldest mutter in the family room as he plucks and presses and then strums on his instrument. Sometimes he has to close his eyes when an out-of-tone note vibrates in his ear or when he hears Zach growl in the little way that reminds Ben a.) his son is struggling and b.) the Beast curse definitely still lives on in their family. Then, one day, he walks through the room and listens to Zach play 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' without any pauses and on all the right keys. And then Zach sets down the guitar with a proud smile and looks up for approval. And at the moment, man, wow. He's been proud of Mal before, but never like this.
Today I lost sight of my daughter and I was looking around the living room like “wtf she was just here” and starting to panic because it really felt like she had vanished into thin air and then I heard myself toot but I was like wtf I didn’t toot I’m sure I didn’t and that’s when I realized she was just shadowing me so hard core that I couldn’t see her, like she was as close behind me as a person can possibly be without touching, and she only revealed herself with the toot.
Anyway I had a lot of apprehension about becoming a mother, but this is good.